Chapter 4: The Hiroyuki Council
I
Satoshi knelt before the Hiroyuki Council, his head bowed. Even though he didn’t lift his head, Satoshi sensed the heavy pressure of the Elder’s gazes upon him. Satoshi couldn’t bear to look any of them in the eye--least of all his mother. There was no way now he would become an Onmyouji. But even more heart-wrenching than failing to summon a shikigami was that he disappointed his mother. That he shamed his entire clan.

“Satoshi-kun,” one of the Elders spoke. “What you have done was very dangerous. Trying to summon a shikigami on your own…what were you thinking, boy?”

His hands clenched into fists, before tear drops dotted the wood paneling below him. Satoshi knew it looked undignified, but he couldn’t help it--there was so much pain and hatred locked deep inside him. He felt it underneath the surface, broiling and seething with such untamed malice--but what scared Satoshi the most wasn’t the acclimation of the darkness in the human soul over the years. He was afraid of the darkness and sin that dwelled deep in him.

“I-I’m sorry…” Satoshi said through numb lips. “I just…I…”

Satoshi couldn’t speak. His throat clenched and it became harder to breathe. Nothing but silence was coming from the Council. While Satoshi reflected on the sin he committed, he felt a comforting hand on his shoulder. Satoshi looked up and saw his mother’s gentle face before him.

“Satoshi-kun, the Elders have put a seal on your body that restrains the curse the aragami cast upon you. We were surprised to find that your body was able to hold so much hatred and malice,” Akiko said before her eyes took on a sadder cast. “The seal can only hold on for so long. One day the curse will spread throughout your body, eating you from the inside and poisoning your mind. So remember, Satoshi-kun...never give into the dark will of the curse.”

“Lady Akiko,” another Elder spoke up. “This boy will be a problem. I understand that he is your son and the only reminder of the great Kohryu Hiroyuki…but he is a threat to us all. One day he will become a demon that we Onmyouji are sworn to protect this world from.”

“What are you implying, Elder?” Akiko said, her eyes flashing in a rare moment of anger. “He is my only son.”

“We understand that you are reacting out of a mother’s instinct, but please remember your duties as an Onmyouji. We are to preserve balance in the world and to protect it from threats. Do you understand?”

Akiko closed her eyes, before she said, “I will train him myself. Satoshi will become a fine Onmyouji. I know that he has the power to resist the curse. I have faith in him.”

“Lady Akiko, I must plead with you to rethink your decision. Do you understand the danger that you are putting the entire clan in?”

“Kohryu would have faith in my decision,” Akiko said. “He would never give up on Satoshi. I will never give up on Satoshi.”

The Elder bowed his head.

“We will respect your decision to train Satoshi as an Onmyouji. Unfortunately, once he becomes of age, then he shall be exiled from our clan. He shall not step foot on our sacred grounds again.”

With that, the Elders then stood, bowed, and the meeting was adjourned. They filed out of the room one by one, and none of them looked Satoshi in the eye when they passed. In their minds, Satoshi was already dead and exiled from the clan. Satoshi trembled, though surprisingly, he did not cry this time. He simply resigned to his fate, knowing that, once he reached the age of manhood, he would be gone forever. And while he lived here, it would be like he never existed in the first place.

“Oh, Satoshi-kun,” Akiko whispered, enfolding her arms around her only son and embracing him close to her. Silent tears trekked down the beautiful woman’s normally dignified face. “I’m sorry that I couldn’t do more for you. It breaks my heart, knowing that I will be part from you…”

She then kissed him on the forehead, trying to smile through her tears as she petted her son’s long hair. “Know that I will always love you, Satoshi-kun. Now and forever.”

II
Seasons change. People change. But his mother’s love always remained constant. Satoshi knew that there were many things that he owed his mother for—her love, her providing food and comfort, his clothes, taking care of him when he was a helpless and defenseless babe, teaching him Onmyoujutsu, imparting life lessons and knowledge and education into his head. Satoshi knew that he had to work hard, for her sake. He trained underneath her tutelage and soaked up her lessons well. He was excluded from the Village’s Academy of Onmyouji, who would one day become a Court Magician’s to train and act as a retainers underneath the Emperor. That dream and ambition faded away, though Satoshi thought another path existed for him out there.

The seal and the curse ebbed and flowed within him. Sometimes there were good days, sometimes there were bad days. But as long as he had his mother, that was the only thing that mattered. She was his entire universe. The other Clan members may have shunned him—though his mother was always there for them.

The Stern Elder, in his own way, would look out for Satoshi as well. Though he had to keep up appearances, or else the other Elders would accuse him of showing favoritism and excusing a rotten apple from his misdeeds. Sometimes in their private meetings, Satoshi and the Stern Elder would sit on the bench in the park and they would partake in the eating of dango together, watching the sakura trees. Then just as soon as the Stern Elderr would come, he would disappear.

The other children noted that there was something wrong with Satoshi. But upon seeing that their parents shunned him, none of the children wanted anything to do with him and stopped playing with him. Sometimes Satoshi would hear an undercurrent of dark thoughts corrupting his head, trying to overcome him with malice and hate, though Satoshi fought against this subconscious will with all his might, remembering his mother’s words to never give into the curse.

“Satoshi-kun,” Akiko said, leaning down on the floor on the low-end table as she prepared dinner for them. “It is time for dinner.”

Satoshi put on a smile for her, thanking her for the meal. “Thank you, Okaa-san. Itadakimasu!”

He clapped his hands together, as though in prayer before he started to eat his meal of fish and vegetables and rice. It was prepared by loving hands, and his mother possessed a culinary streak that could make even the humblest of dishes taste gourmet.

“How are you feeling?” His mother asked.

“Fine,” Satoshi said, thinking about it. “I was studying an arcane book about demons. If I can understand my enemy and their psychology, then maybe…maybe I can prevent myself from giving into the curse.”

“Demonology isn’t exactly a diagnosis,” Akiko said, before reconsidering. “Though people have often blamed certain illnesses on demons before when it was perfectly ordinary causes. Do you have a dream, Satoshi-kun?”

Satoshi paused in his eating, gawking at her with some rice on his cheek. Akiko took the rice from his cheek with her chopsticks and put it in her mouth, smiling playfully.

“A dream…” Satoshi stuttered. “I…I don’t know. I guess I want to cure my curse? Not give into it?”

“That is not a dream,” Akiko said, poking his nose. “A dream is something wondrous and beautiful, a silver lining that keeps you going even when it seems like you’re in your darkest moment of despair. You need to have that something to hold onto…even when it feels like the curse is at its worst.”

“Well,” Satoshi said, slowly eating his rice, considering and chewing thoughtfully. "I thought I wanted to be like Father, but I decided on something else.”

“And what would that be?” Akiko said, though there seemed to be a twinkle in her eye that said she knew.

“I wanted to go on an adventure around the world and perform good deeds,” Satoshi said. “I want to make up for the mistake I’ve made, summoning the demon. I will pay off the sins I’ve created by taking on the sins of others and helping others become better people, their best selves.”

“Do you think you want to be a scholar, a teacher? Or an Onmyoujutsu guru?” Akiko said, that same twinkle in her eye.

“I want to be the best person that I can be,” Satoshi said, gobbling up his rice, fish, and vegetables. Once he was finished with his meal, he patted his slender stomach, which was filled with nutrient-rich food, though he still lingered by the table to have good after-dinner conversation with his mother. He always savored these moments, after having eaten his mother’s home-cooked meals and partaking in a conversation with another human being. No one else would speak with him. That was just the way of the village.

“So,” Akiko said as she began to clean up the earthenware dishes from the table. Satoshi helped with washing and cleaning them in a nearby river, cleansing the utensils and food. “I want you to self-reflect on your dream. Cherish and hold onto it. I think it will be your ‘something’ to make it through really hard times.”

“You mean I haven’t been through the worst of it yet?” Satoshi joked, though there was an unusually somber cast in his mother’s gaze as they began to make their way back to the mansion, walking along the stone pathway and between the verdant grass and wildflowers that surrounded them.

“How is your seal?” Akiko asked.

Satoshi cocked his head.

“It’s doing fine, actually. I’m surprised it’s lasted this long, actually,” Satoshi said, before looking up toward the sky. “That is something that I’m grateful for.”

“Yes, there are many blessings in this life,” Akiko said, smiling gently. “My greatest blessing of all was you.”

Satoshi smiled, before saying, “I’ve been keeping up in my training, too! Pretty soon I’ll be a Master Of All. What do you think of that?”

Akiko smiled openly at him. “You’ve always been a quick learner, Satoshi. However, remember to be humble and treat everyone equally. Remember, it’s not about treating just your equals with respect, but those of a lower station. Help bring them up to your station or higher, if you can.”

Satoshi clenched his hands into fists.

“I’ve always wanted a rival to challenge me and push me to go on! Though I…besides you, Mother…I really don’t have any friends…”

Satoshi drifted into silence, though this was more contemplative rather than depressive.

Akiko put a hand on Satoshi’s shoulder.

“I’m sure that you will meet the right people some day, Satoshi,” Akiko said. “They will respect you because of your kind and gentle heart. And if you find those people who treasure you as you are, then hold onto them fiercely. They might be your precious people and you might share them in on your dream too.”

Satoshi grinned, before he cast his gaze toward the starbound sky.

“Thank you, Mother.”

Akiko stood next to him, brushing a shoulder against him. Satoshi looked down, blinked, then realized his mother stood a head shorter than he. When did he suddenly overpass her in height?

He then glanced up toward the heavens, and noticed a magnificent sight—a shooting star streaking across the midnight blue and violet expanse of the night. Satoshi stood there, awe-inspired, before he turned to his mother and saw her with a glint of tears in her eyes as the starlight reflected in her green eyes.

“What did you wish for, Mother?” Satoshi inquired out of curiosity.

“I wish for safe journeys and travels for you, when you come of age,” Akiko said, while she wiped her eyes with her kimono sleeve and smiled up at Satoshi. “What did you wish for?”

“That is a secret for now,” Satoshi said, smiling. “I feel I’m not worthy of the wish yet, but I will make it a reality with my own hands.”

Akiko nodded and smiled, before she turned toward the heavens once more, a resplendent portrait of serenity as her burdens eased.

III
She taught him many things, from the cycle of the stars to the nature of the elements and spiritual divination that foretold the future. This was the nature of an Onmyouji, to be attuned to the spiritual aspects of the world. Akiko used everything in her repertoire of knowledge to teach her son to use magic, and he was an eager student that easily learned. Akiko prided in her son’s abilities, though she also knew with a heavy heart that everything depended on her to raise her son right and make sure that he used his powers responsibly, instead of giving into the malice that surely festered within him everyday.

“The elements are Fire, Earth, Water, Wind, and the Cosmos,” Akiko explained to her son one day. “An Onmyouji can channel these different energies and project powerful magic through these mediums. Do you understand that, Satoshi?”

Satoshi nodded, eager to learn more as he rested his hands atop his knees, stuck in a kneeling position on a cushion. “And Onmyouji also use the principles of yin and yang in their magic.”

“That is correct, Satoshi-kun. Can you explain the principles of yin and yang for me?”

“Yin and yang is the principle of two seemingly contrary forces that work together to create a complementary whole. Yin and yang is like male and female, fire and water, and light and dark.”

“Very good. Remember the principles of Yin and Yang while you do your work, Satoshi. There may be a dark malice inside of you, though there is also a bright shining soul that cannot be extinguished by the darkness of the corruption. You need to realize that the corruption within you is there to teach you a lesson about what it means to be human, to be kind and generous to others, to show love towards your fellow human beings and creatures that inhabit the earth.”

“I understand that, Mother, but why don’t the rest of the family see it that way?”

Akiko closed her eyes and went towards her son, gathering him up in her arms and then stroking his hair lovingly while she spoke in his ear. “They are set in their ways. They see you as nothing but the malice that is inside of you, when in truth, you are so much more than that. You are Satoshi Hiroyuki, my beloved son, and you will become an Onmyouji that will be worthy of standing in your father’s place. They don’t see that, though. But one day, maybe I will be able to change their minds.”

“You don’t have to change their minds,” Satoshi said. “I’m prepared to make a journey to get rid of my curse.”

“I still feel as though time is slipping by through my fingers,” Akiko said as she patted her son on the head lovingly. “The closer you grow to manhood, the more that I fear that I will never see you again. That’s a possibility that leaves a deep ache in my heart. Oh, and to think that I lost my husband, and now I’m losing my only son, as well…”

“I will come back,” Satoshi promised her. “I’ll learn everything that you’ll have to teach me. And I promise that I won’t give into the malice.”

Akiko smiled through her tears, before saying, “I trust you, Satoshi-kun. You are still full of hope and dreams, just like before. That’s the side of you that I see, the little dreamer that wishes to become a powerful Onmyouji and follow in his father’s footsteps. You are truly becoming a man in heart and spirit.”

“Do you think that I will be great like Father?” Satoshi asked. “Even though I have this curse upon me?”

Akiko’s smile turned sad, though nonetheless, she faced her son and wrapped her arms around him, kimono sleeves draping forward. “My dearest son, you don’t have to worry about a thing. I think that you will become a great Onmyouji, just like Kohryu. Even though the rest of the clan may fear you, for what you bear inside of you, I have faith in you, Satoshi.”

Satoshi closed his eyes as he returned the embrace that his mother gave him. “Would Father have faith in me too?”

“Yes,” Akiko said. “Your Father and I love you very much. You know that, don’t you, my sweet Satoshi?”

“I know,” Satoshi said, before his mother rose up from her knelt posture.

“It’s time to train,” Akiko said more seriously now. “Soon, you will be able to receive your very own shikigami.”

Satoshi nearly toppled over his mother when he embraced her in a fierce hug, unbelieving what he just heard. She was going to allow him to summon a shikigami, even after the accident that happened years ago with the god of malice that came out of the portal? His dream of becoming an Onmyouji was still within reach. Though how did his Mother manage to convince the Hiroyuki council to let Satoshi summon a shikigami?

“I know what you’re thinking, Satoshi,” Akiko said as she petted her son’s head. “I fought against the Elder Council and said that you will be able to summon a shikigami for your thirteenth birthday. You wouldn’t be an Onmyouji without a shikigami companion by your side. Besides, thinking of sending you off by yourself…saddens me greatly. It would bring me ease to know that you have your shikigami for your companion, if no one else.”

“Thank you, Mother,” Satoshi said as he continued to hug his mother. “This is very important for me. You don’t know how important. I owe you everything, including my life.”

“There, there, Satoshi,” Akiko said as she put her hands on his shoulders now and stood up. “You don’t owe me a thing. You’re my beloved son. That will never change.”

Satoshi stood as well, before he followed his mother into the room where he performed the ritual for a shikigami so long ago. He shivered a bit, as this room still gave him nightmares about that aragami that materialized from the portal that he created in the room. However, having his mother’s hand to hold and having her by his side eased him greatly, and Satoshi knew that his mother would successfully invoke a shikigami into life for him.

She drew the summoning circles on the ground, before she spoke the incantations for summoning a shikigami. Once she uttered the words, a bright glow emanated from the circles in the ground, and then flames seared straight out in a fiery maelstrom. Satoshi flinched and covered his eyes with his arms, though his mother remained calm as the fire then died down and formed an amorphous shape of fire, and then it materialized into a blazing hot egg. Satoshi looked towards his mother, and she nodded for him to go ahead and take the egg.

Satoshi then took the egg in his hands, and found it searing hot. It was like touching the blaze of an open fire, though Satoshi somehow intuitively knew that he must hold onto the egg no matter what. This was a test of his will, a test to show that he was worthy of bearing the shikigami that this egg would bring forth into the world. Satoshi held onto it, face contorted in pain as his hands were burning, burning, and then there finally came a point when the burning had ceased and the egg felt cool to the touch.

Cracks spiderwebbed across its surface, and a young chick fell out of the egg and into the awaiting palms of Satoshi’s hands. Satoshi stared at it in wide-eyed wonder, before turning to look at his mother, who nodded in approval.

“There is your shikigami, Satoshi,” Akiko said as she brushed Satoshi’s hair aside from his face. “Take good care of him and raise him well. For he is also born as a part of your soul, as your inseparable companion. When an Onmyouji makes a pact with a spirit in the Otherworld, they materialize and shape from a person’s will and soul. Such a beautiful shikigami. I don’t understand why the clan cannot see that you are Satoshi and not the aragami that is sealed within you.”

“My very own shikigami,” Satoshi said in awe as the young phoenix began to stretch its wings and fly around Satoshi’s head. It landed atop his head, finding refuge there, and stayed still. “I love him. I think I’m going to name him Feng Huang.”

“Go ahead and do so,” Akiko said with a smile. “I see that you’ve put a lot of love and effort into that name.”

Satoshi began to cry tears of joy, and his phoenix fluttered from the top of his head and perched itself next to Satoshi’s kneeling form, tilting its head towards his upraised hands and crying upon them. The burn marks from earlier started to heal from Satoshi’s hands until they were completely unmarred.

“Healing tears,” Akiko said. “A fine partner for my son. Take care of him, Feng Huang.”