(Yuria’s POV)

 

I waited with bated breath for my daughter to say anything. Each second felt like it would last for an eternity, trapping me in a prison of self-doubt and agony.

 

Her face had grown pale the second she saw what was in that picture. I couldn’t really blame her. Anyone would be shocked to see that kind of image of someone they really cared about.

 

“M-mom..” said Anna, her voice so small and quivering that I had to make a great effort to listen “Is-Is this person... you?”

 

She had a look of complete disbelief and shock. It was like she couldn’t possibly believe what was in that picture.

 

‘I can’t really blame her for not wanting to believe that image to be true’

 

“Yes, it’s me.” I said, confirming her doubts.

 

My words caused a crestfallen expression to appear on her face.

 

I could only chuckle in self-derision at her reaction. I knew that she would make that kind of reaction, but it still hurt me to see my daughter make that kind of face to me.

 

The photo she was seeing was s small memento of my dark days. Something that I kept to myself as a reminder of my lowest moments, in case for some reason I started to miss those days.

 

I heard that sometimes people would miss the most inexplicable things, so I kept to actually remember what those days felt like.

 

The photo was a younger me, from roughly fifteen years ago, in a micro-bikini surrounded by naked men. I had a melted expression of pleasure, my body covered by their seed and written all over with derogatory names.

 

Cock-sleeve.

 

Cum-bucket.

 

Meat-toilet.

 

And many others much worse them those.

 

I never felt anything remotely like a longing for those days ever since I abandoned that life, so today was the first time that I’ve seen this picture in years. And just like I imagined, it brought only painful memories and hurtful images of my past.

 

I don’t miss those days, and I’m now certain that I never will.

 

“B-but, how? How can this be you mom?” asked Anna, her voice starting to grow stranger “How could you-”

 

“This is from before you were born” I interrupted her, my voice strangely calm even for me.

 

Anna simply looked at me at a loss for words. Apparently, my current state caused her to not know how to deal with the situation.

 

‘It’s really strange, isn’t it? The way I’m so calm with this entire situation.’

 

“I won’t enter the details about how things went in that direction, it would take weeks, but for now suffice to say that I’m already familiar with the worst that people can think and do.” I said, my voice still unnaturally steady.

 

‘Somehow I feel... like I’m not talking about myself’

 

“I saw what true depravity and degeneracy looked like, and for a time I thought that I was happy with being a part of that world.” I said, my voice still sounding so calm that even I was a little unnerved “But that changed when I had you two.”

 

“U-Us?” asked Anna, her voice so small that I barely could hear it.

 

“You and Rina” I said, my voice now gaining a little bit more of ‘life’ “ When had the both of you, it was like a wake-up call. It was only then that I manage to gather the strength necessary to get out of that world”

 

Anna at this point was only looking at me, her previous shock and desolation gone and in their place was attentiveness and focus. It was like her previous thoughts had been put on hold, being replaced by pure concentration.

 

‘This might or might not have been a mistake, but I have to make sure she hears what I have to say seriously’

 

I caught her by the shoulders and stared deeply into her eyes. She looked back at me, her gaze firm and focussed. There wasn’t anything negative in her eyes. There wasn’t judgment, disgust, disdain, shame, or anything alike.

 

It was uncanny.

 

‘I can think about that later.’

 

“You know why I’m telling all of this Anna?” I asked, and when she shook her head in denial I continued “It’s because I want you to take the advice I’m about to give you very seriously”

 

She took a while, her face not showing anything that she might be thinking, but she eventually gave me a small nod in understanding.

 

“I learned a long time ago that what people call normal doesn’t really matter. We need to search for what can make us happy, regardless of what others might think” I said, trying to best express my not so easy to explain belief “So you shouldn’t care if this situation that we found ourselves in is a little unusual. Compared to what I’ve seen and experienced, it’s by far much more ‘normal’”

 

My voice was turning a bit bitter bow, so I had to stop to compose myself a little. Anna showed me for a brief second a look of... sadness?

 

‘What is she sad about?’

 

“So, instead of focussing on the unusual in this situation, you should focus on what’s the best way to make sure that we all can be happy” I said, giving her my final advice “I accepted Takashi’s confession to me because I got the feeling that he was being truly genuine, and that he might really be capable to make all of us happy. But I was also afraid that he might become a degenerate if I weren’t there to advise and help him when needed, and I don’t want to see that happen”

 

I tried my best to convey to Anna why I was willing to accept Takashi without getting into too many details. I truly loved him but I could not simply accept him like that when I had to consider my family as well, but I wouldn’t be able to explain everything to Anna in the little time we had. Takashi and Rina might leave their game anytime soon, and I wanted to wrap up this situation with Anna as fast as possible.

 

“This is some of my reason, and the advice that I have for you Anna” I said, wrapping up this talk “Will you take my words seriously Anna?”

 

“...I will” she said, her voice trembling a little bit.

 

I was satisfied with the answer and certain that she would take my words to heart, so I released her from my grasp. The second my hands let go of her shoulders however, she practically tackled me.

 

“Wha-! What are you doing Anna?” I asked, surprised by her sudden move.

 

“...I’m sorry mom” she mumbled, her face buried in my chest.

 

“...sorry?” I asked back, still a little confused.

 

“I”m sorry. And thanks for... for everything” she said, her voice quivering more than before.

 

Before I could say anything I notice a wet sensation on my clothes. Anna’s arms were holding me as strongly as they could and her voice was whimpering a little bit.

 

She was crying.

 

I hugged her back, trying to calm her down a little bit.

 

I tried to say something, but the words were stuck in my mouth. It was like my brain couldn’t find the proper words to express what I was thinking.

 

Suddenly I felt a hot and wet sensation on my cheeks. I was so concentrated in my conversation with Anna that I didn’t notice that my eyes were moist and hot.

 

At some point, without even realizing it, I started to cry.

 

‘When did this- I already came to terms with my past, so why-’

 

I didn’t know why I was crying, but I also didn’t feel like finding out now.

 

I simply held my daughter in my arms, while she cried together with me.

 

And at that moment, I felt like a dam inside of me had been broken.