The full moon was shining at its brightest across the horizon. Through the open window of a bedroom, a moonbeam continued to provide a ray of dim lighting, creating a cool blue ambiance when it mixed with the darkness inside.
Sitting still in the shadows, on a floor of furnished wood and facing a blank wall, a girl in a ruffled kimono had only herself. Though her solitude lasted only about five minutes, the silence of no activity and the cold of the evening winds made her delude herself to spending time alone for an eternity.
It was nothing new; this was how she always operated, and she was used to it.
She never stopped hating it.
For better or worse, no matter how much her life had changed, it was always lacking what she sought.
Her life since birth was already worth loathing. Spending every day laying down on a futon and only walking a few steps on weak legs with heavy breaths before an inevitable collapse was something nobody would ever want. It made her unable to perform any physical activity or see what was beyond the confines of her home. It also limited the number of people she could interact with.
Then she turned ten. Her life had taken a sudden turn for the worse when she and her sister lost their parents to a common thief. She walked down the path of the assassin to rebuild her household and earn a massive income despite her young age and lack of outside financial support. Thanks to training, she became more physical and came to relish the effects of violence to some extent, but a thought always haunted her at the back of her head:
"Who would want a killer for a friend?"
At her own pace, she discovered herself to be a [Renegade]. That opportunity allowed her to escape the frailty she so despised, but it came with a cost. The price for staying healthy was to frequently rob others for their vitality, or else she would regress to her weakened state again. Not only that, the other innate abilities every other [Renegade] possessed ruined her efforts of living a decent social life. Her [Influence] didn't stimulate any negative emotion unto others, but it still caused nothing but unnecessary trouble for herself and to the people around her. Her [Laws] or at least one of them made social interaction far too risky.
And it wasn't like she could just explain to everyone about how to interact with others like herself. After all, the [Renegades] were prejudiced as a threat to the public. She had to stay wary because any information she shared may be used against her. Any friends she made may betray her.
Then she found her way to Cameron's Feint, Sarkansas. What was supposed to be just another assassination, led to an unforeseen creation of a new bond with another person through a heinous contract. To spend time with another person again, it was a re-discovery that re-kindled her internal flames. Sure, it paved the way for both good and bad experiences with still more to come, but it also brought back a spark that told her she could still find a reason to exist, no matter how tainted she already was as a person.
To develop connections with others. Whether or not she wanted to admit it, that was what a forced loner like Rio Kiyodera desired the most.
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The rigid turn of the doorknob reached her ears. In an instant, Rio was freed from her cage of eternal time when she was given company.
Lucas let himself back into his bedroom with a cup of hot steaming tea in each hand, both of which were both mildly shaking due to the amount of blood he’d lost. Keeping the tea from spilling over the cup's brim proved to be a hassle for Lucas even after he removed his socks to prevent accidental slipping. Not even re-entering Rio's [Influence] gave him any significant help.
"Hey... I uh, brewed us some chamomile. This should put us at ease."
Lucas was doing his best to make himself sound more mellow, a complete contrast to the "frankly my dear, I don't give a damn" attitude he wielded against Rio when she provoked him.
The cup that was better maintained was carefully laid next to Rio, who continued to sit the same way she did as before Lucas left the room. She was still motionless and unwilling to respond, hugging her knees to herself and burying her face between them. Nothing changed after she heard the white piece of porcelain getting placed to her left, on the floor.
"You should drink that before it gets cold," Lucas suggested, sitting crossed-legged with his back facing Rio's at a distance that could fit up to two people between them.
The stains on his sweater and pants were getting bigger from all the blood they continued to absorb and the blood running down his neck made the once pleasant breeze feel like a nasty chill biting his skin. Lucas was still a mess. Having chosen to prioritize Rio's well-being over his own partially due to his guilt, he wasn't in the mood to tend to himself until he was certain he and Rio could put their differences behind them. He drank his tea with tiny sips to bear its heat while waiting for Rio to get started on hers.
It did not differ from five minutes prior. Rio continued to ignore him.
Sighing, Lucas figured that Rio was still sour over the things he said to her as a way of retaliation. Now that his composure had returned to normal, he couldn’t help but shudder under the weight of his actions, and what he wanted most at that moment was to address them before his guilt could weigh him down further.
After figuring that only he could make things progress in their situation, Lucas took the initiative. He placed his cup down after the last drop of tea went down his throat.
"...Rio?" Lucas peeked over his shoulder to a curtain of raven hair. "About everything I said, I--"
"My head hurts a lot, but this is nothing compared to every truth you have spoken."
Rio finally responded. Her dual voices were still present, and their contempt shook Lucas to his core. "Yes, I cannot help but feel superior to those who are not [Renegades]. Yes, I actually believed friends or relationships will always remain a daydream for me. They were all in the back of my head until you were so kind as to remind me. Good job, Lucas. Superb."
She acknowledged Lucas on how he read her like an open book, but her gloomy tone and the unsettling nature of her voice left Lucas with a victory he wasn't proud to carry.
Lucas cleared his throat to give himself time to mentally prepare. It was unnerving for him to hear Rio, now talking with two voices at the same time - one that sounded like the playful tone he acquainted himself with alongside a slightly deeper voice that distorted with a minor echo. Nobody in the right mind would consider that to be "human."
"Yeah... I want to say that while I can't undo everything I said, I'll come clean now and admit that I went too far. Sorr--"
"Apology not accepted."
His attempt to say "sorry" was shot down without a second thought. The fact that Rio did so without hesitation while expecting it at the same time led Lucas to lower his head in shame.
So, everything he said was true. Words can be harmless, but what he said affected Rio on a very personal level. Because she didn't forgive him, his guilt doubled in weight. Petrified, Lucas had no idea on what he should do next. His eyes were twitching and fighting to stay open but falling asleep was impossible for him.
Growing bored of sitting still and wanting to find out what was next to her, Rio shot a quick glance at her cup of tea while keeping most of her face hidden within the safety of her crossed arms. Within the cup were ripples on the clear honey-yellow drink's surface. It was coming from a single pink flower bud with its petals all gathered at the top and center to form an unbloomed shape. Its base was flat, allowing it to float like a raft.
From the looks alone, the presentation looked like a peace offering. Rio laced her fingers into the cup's ringed handle and picked it up, the cup warming her hands without eliciting a wince. Her lips touched its brim, and she smelled the warm ribbons of vapor that emanated from the tea. A sip told her that her beverage didn't have much bitterness. In fact, it was sweet and airy with the harmonizing infusion of red apples and honey. It was so easy to take that Rio could drink it straight in one sitting despite the heat, but it only took the first sip for her to feel warm and fuzzy on the inside.
It was almost like an [Influence] was at work. Before she knew it, more negative traces in her emotions faded away to where staying angry felt like a waste of time and energy.
Thinking with a clearer head allowed Rio to re-visit her squabble with Lucas from another point of view, which helped her to understand why he had taken such as a stand against her. She got a taste of her own medicine not just because of her prejudiced accusation - it extended to when they first met, which was just about a day before.
It made Rio recall a few moments where she teased or used Lucas on every chance she got despite having just met: how she enjoyed his fumbling as he tried to eat dinner with chopsticks at her house, how she used him as a life-bank for her third [Law] when she needed to recover, how she used him as a cover-up in front of his best friend so she could have an excuse to stay in his house, and most recently, how she jabbed him around while goading him for his answer on how her kimono pajamas looked on her.
Now that she thought about it, she never did this before - not even to her sister. Lucas was the first person she ever picked on, and to Rio, it happened naturally from her perspective.
Maybe she wanted attention.
Her mood improved, and it was only continuing to do so as her reflection went on. Rio placed a hand near her left eye and ran it down to her cheek. All she felt was a smooth surface with no ridges. This told her that the glowing azure cracks that once broke out on that spot had receded until they disappeared like they were never there to begin with.
Having calmed down to some extent, Rio tested her voice.
"Lucas?" her voice called, singular and recognizable.
In response to the sound of his name, Lucas lifted his head but did not look back as he was uncertain of Rio's mood and not ready to meet her face-to-face.
"You want to apologize, right?" Rio asked him, her voice growing softer to the point of lacking even a trace of hostility. "I can tell that you now have second thoughts but saying 'sorry' and being forgiven like that is not the way I do things."
Lucas was puzzled over Rio's views on apology and forgiveness. Judging by what she said, Rio wasn't the type of person who would be satisfied with apologetic words alone. The extent of how much someone should repent to earn her forgiveness piqued his curiosity.
"Then what will it take for you to let this all go -- UWAAAHH!!!"
Lucas tried to ask a question, only to lurch with a high-pitched yelp when he was interrupted by a sudden bit of weight that landed on his shoulder. His breathing intensified, and his heart slammed on to his chest, almost like it was about to burst out.
"Calm down, will you?" Rio, who was now directly behind Lucas, took her hand off his shoulder. "It is only me," she assured him, but then remembered that he probably didn't see her as someone who he'd feel safe with anyway.
Lucas was no longer the only person to be baffled. His reaction was considered far too exaggerated for Rio, who only placed a hand on his shoulder from behind. She was the only person in the room with him, and there were no signs that something or someone else could have joined them. Still, there were more important matters to attend to.
"Anyway, let me see your neck," Rio said, shelving her minor curiosity for the time being as she moved around to face Lucas directly before kneeling to his eye level.
After his breathing became more stabilized, Lucas allowed Rio to look at the damage she did to him. He craned his neck to one side, slightly removing her from his field of vision while exposing the first mark she left on him. Both sides of his neck had the same wound: bite marks from a head turned sideways.
"They may be very bloody, but they are not as serious as you may think," Rio said after examining the personal signatures she left on him.
"Maybe because you're not the one who got bit," Lucas pointed out with a grumble.
"At least I missed the important veins," Rio told Lucas, her satisfying words relieving him from some of his worries. "Now hold still. I will heal your wounds for you, starting with this."
She gently held on to Lucas' shoulders. By doing so in front of him this time, Lucas didn't react like he witnessed a jumpscare. Getting a sense of how more considerate Rio appeared to be made him lower his guard, much to his own surprise. Rio leaned forward, closer to one of the bite wounds.
I guess this is what she considers an apology, Lucas thought as he allowed himself into Rio's care, still wary about the painful effects of [Reaper's Embrace].
His senses alerted him that something wasn't right as soon as Lucas felt what was happening to his neck. What was wiping his wound wasn't dry and it didn't appear to feel like anything similar to the tissue paper nearby. In fact, Rio didn't even grab a single sheet. What was wiping, no -- caressing his wound was soft, flexible and wet. His skin crawled as a viscous trail replaced his blood on every spot it touched. Lucas dragged his sight to the left corner of his eyes and glimpsed in shock at how dangerously intimate Rio's face was to his neck.
"HMNN!!!"
Rio uttered a muffled cry when she was shoved off by a sudden and forceful push. Lucas scrambled several feet away, panicking in a similar manner to escaping Rio's clutches from their earlier fight.
“WHAT THE HELL, RIO!?" he gasped for the air he lost and exclaimed after reaching a safe distance.
Lucas was frightened beyond his wits, one hand clutching his chest like he was suffering a heart attack. Rio was left wide-eyed after landing hard on her backside.
"There is no need to be afraid," she said, one hand rubbing her soft behind while the other was raised to gesture Lucas that she meant no harm.
"Afraid!?" Lucas rigidly placed a hand on his neck then shook his head while shooting a cautious stare at Rio. "How can I even stay calm when you..." He looked at his fingers, which were dirty with red and bubbly transparent liquid. "...when you just licked me!?"
Rio, who believed she did nothing wrong, tried to explain her actions.
"My tongue is not made of skin, so [Reaper's Embrace] will not activate even if I touch you with--"
"No, no! Forget [Reaper's Embrace] for one second!" Lucas interrupted.
He whipped his head away and he threw his hands outward, both index fingers pointing up as if to tell Rio to shut up and stay far away from him. Before he knew it, his thoughts broke free through an unhinged rant.
"I... I never was the type of guy that didn't mind getting touched without warning, let alone getting licked! A...and it doesn't make things any better even though it was done by someone who's a girl and around my age, for once!"
Gasping, Lucas slapped both hands over his mouth as he uttered a garbled "oh shit.” He was too late to realize that in his panic, he may have said a little too much.
"'For once'?" A bothered Rio monotoned the most suspicious phrase she heard just then. "Lucas... Did something happen to you?"
"F-forget everything I said!" Lucas changed the subject as his body trembled. "If you really want to treat me properly, I have some medical supplies I left downstairs. I'll get them now!"
He rushed himself out of the room, forgetting not to slam the door shut on his way out.
That outburst Lucas put on display reminded Rio of how the day started that morning when he dramatically panicked over how he didn't want her to touch him. She found it strange because, for some reason, he did that on his own without her trying to do anything.
「I thought he was simply afraid of [Reaper's Embrace], but it seems that's not the only reason.」
Rio held her chin as a peculiar interest emerged within her. She was starting to see Lucas in a new light.
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The hallway appeared to stretch farther than usual for him. Lucas went from one end to the other, but he couldn't walk forward in a straight line. He wobbled with every step he took, and each step shifted him to a different lane. His shoulders bumped the walls whenever he strayed too far in one direction. Throughout his wobbling, Lucas held both hands to his head as cold sweat broke out all over his convulsing face. Every thumb and finger did their best to vigorously massage his scalp and relieve him from a dizzying migraine.
Rio's seemingly harmless invasion of his personal space became the catalyst for a horrendous memory. One from years ago and thought to be forgotten. It invoked flashing images of a shadowed figure in the form of an older but still fairly young man holding a set of lacy clothes in one hand, and a thin book in the other. His friendly but distorted voice kept calling Lucas by an affectionate pet name while his sweet demeanor urged him to change into the clothes he was presenting to him.
Like an audible slideshow, more similar images kept playing until they became too much for Lucas to bear. Upon reaching the stairway and before he could go down one step, Lucas fell back and sank to the floor, his back scraping against the wall on his way down. His hands clutched and yanked on countless strands of his hair for recalling what he had been suppressing to the darkest corners of his mind.
The entire hallway was disturbed by a primal scream as its solid walls were hammered repeatedly by the underside of an out-of-control fist. The dense bones in Lucas' hand prevented it from breaking no matter how many times he abused it against the wall, but that didn't stop it from drawing blood after several painful strikes. When his hand grew numb and unable to take any more of his self-inflicted punishment, Lucas, his breathing now erratic, tucked his limbs to himself in a desperate need for comfort and curled into a fetal position, toppling over to one side. His sobbing would have drowned him in his own tears if it wasn't for the pain from his migraine overwhelming his senses first.
Darkness engulfed Lucas' vision. He blacked out, returning the hallway to a state of silence.
No one was there to witness the act.
