In the past three months that I had spent on this world, for some reason I had never really imagined what I would do when I met a living person. For so long I had been living solely with Ahn’Khareen, and I guess I had just gotten used to the undead. I had known of course that other people were out there, but never had I stopped to think about what I would say or do when I met them.

     Meeting them while I was bathing in a river had never crossed my mind.

     “Good afternoon.” The woman said, a little distantly.

     “This is, uh, a little awkward. I wasn’t exactly expecting anybody to be… well here.”

     I kneeled in the river, trying to preserve at least a little modesty. The woman blushed as she realized what I was doing and looked a few feet to the left of me.

     “Imagine how I feel sirrah. These are the lands of the Lord Esmaraldis. None are allowed into the forests unless they are his game wardens or the wood cutters.”

     I looked her over, and she was clearly neither game warden nor wood cutter. She was short, perhaps just over five feet tall, and she looked to be around my age, perhaps eighteen or nineteen. Her skin was pale, which made the freckles dotting the bridge of her nose and her cheeks stand out vividly. Red hair, again like mine, was hanging loose behind her, with ringlets curling around her face and ears.

     Her clothes were also quite nice, but practical at the same time. A close-fitting forest green jacket covered a white shirt and yellow vest, paired with a calf-length skirt of the same green which was slit along both sides. Warm looking grey woven stocking covered her legs underneath the skirt, and a pair of sturdy looking black leather ankle boots completed the look. Notably however, a long knife was sheathed on a belt over her hips and her hand rested awfully close to it as she narrowed her eyes.

     “What are you doing in these woods?”

     “Well…” I fidgeted in the river, feeling the cold start to seep into my bones. “I guess the simplest explanation is that I live here.”

     “Truly? You do?”

     She seemed strangely surprised by that.

     “Well, yes?”

     “So, you don’t work in the village then? I would have recognized you if you did.”

     Ah ha! I thought. There’s a village near by! And where there’s a village, there’s people who know what’s going on!

     “No, I don’t.”

     “What do you do all day then?”

     I thought about it, trying not to give away the fact that a lich had a cave nearby and I was studying necromancy from her. God my life is weird.

     “Let’s just say I’m a student of nature.” It was a stupid line, and I wasn’t proud of it, but it seemed to satisfy her.

     She leaned forwards, suddenly interested. “So, you’re a scholar?”

     “Well, yes, I suppose that’s as good of a word as any.”

     I’d never really thought of myself as a scholar before, but considering I probably had more education than most people in this world since I had been in school for the past twelve years, it was probably true.

     “I see.” She said, with a new look in her eye as she considered me again. “I had heard of naturalists sequestering themselves in nature to better understand the mortal condition, but I always fancied those stories as just that. Stories. And now I am meeting with one face to face.”

     “Oh, trust me, I know what it’s like to have stories show up in front of you.”

     “Pardon me?”

     “It’s nothing. But that’s me; a naturalist, a regular Thoreau.”

     I bowed sitting down and cursed quietly when my wet hair stuck to my face, and I had to brush it back.

     “A what?”

     “Erm, Thoreau was a scholar who did what I am doing now. Living in the woods and all of that.”

     “Interesting.” She frowned. “I haven’t heard of him, and I’ve read most of the commonly available texts.”

     Wincing at the slip of my tongue, I hurriedly tried to cover my tracks. “That’s because, er, he was elven.”

     “Oh, I suppose that explains it. I suppose I can’t say I’ve read many elven texts, but I suppose naturalists are more well-read than I am.”

     “What about you then?” I said, eager to deflect away from any questions that would out me as not belonging here since the only books I had read since coming to this world were on the nature of magic.

     “Excuse me?”

     “Well, if nobody is supposed to be in these forests, then why are you here?”

     Her cheeks flushed again, although I couldn’t tell if it was from anger or embarrassment.

     “I might have snuck into the forest when no one was looking.”

     Well, isn’t that the pot calling the kettle black? Still, I probably shouldn’t upset the only other person besides Ahn’Khareen that I had met.

     “Well, I guess we’re both rule breakers. I won’t tell the police, er, the town watch if you don’t.”

     A glint sparkled in her eye. “Very well sirrah, I suppose I can keep mum about it.”

     “Why did you sneak into the forest in the first place? I mean I kind of live here, but what about you?

     “Oh!” She chuckled and pointed back at the edge of the bank. “I came here to paint!”

     I had been too focused on the woman in front of me, but now that I looked, there was indeed an easel and a bag laying on the edge of the forest. She must have placed them down when she saw me floating in the river.

     Silence hung in the air for another couple of seconds between us, the only sound was the burbling of the river flowing around me. A chill settled down around my back, like if somebody was staring at me behind my back. Looking around nervously I couldn’t see anything but knowing what lay out in the woods didn’t ease my sudden paranoia.

     “Pardon me, but would you possibly mind looking away?”

     Her eyes narrowed slightly, and her hand drifted closer to her knife. “Sirrah, while I do not believe you have come into this forest to do any mischief, I’m not a fan of turning my back on a strange man.”

     “If you don’t mind, I would prefer to continue this discussion out of the water, and into some clothes.”

     I waved at myself, and she followed the gesture before blushing and looking quickly away.

     “Ah, well yes of course in that case, I mean, dreadfully sorry.”

     She hurriedly looked the other way, although her hand remained by her knife. I couldn’t fault her for that at least, I was a stranger where I apparently shouldn’t be. Wading through the rest of the river took only a second, and for once I was quite thankful for my robe, considering it was simply a woolen sack that I could throw over my head and be fully clothed in just a second. I was pretty sure she had stolen a look though, as once my head popped out of the neck of the robe her face was a bright shade of red, even if she kept up the pretense of looking away.

     Deciding not to comment on her ogling I coughed to let her know I was decent. “Thank you miss.”

     She opened her mouth to say something but checked herself. Then she smiled and tilted her head. “It was my pleasure sirrah.”

     I couldn’t help but blush myself, she had gotten me there. “But perhaps now that I’m clothed, I could learn your name?”

     “What do you- oh! Oh, my apologies I’ve been frightfully rude! But of course, I am Penelope, Penelope Mara.”

     She stumbled over the name, but I wasn’t sure why. The only thing I could think of was that she was trying to hide who she really was, but without knowing anything of the local politics, it didn’t mean anything to me at all.

     “Well, it’s a pleasure to meet you, Miss Mara.”

     “Please, call me Penelope.”

     “Okay then Penelope, my name is William Amsel.”

     “William Amsel.” She said, rolling the word around in her mouth like she was tasting it. “I can’t say I’ve heard it’s like before. Is it southern?”

     “Er, no, I come from the north?”

     That was the wrong thing to say, considering how she leaned forwards with a passionate light in her eyes.

     “Really? Oh, from how far north? If you are a scholar, did you come from the capital? Say do you have any news, any discoveries, or recent inventions? Perhaps some new clothing ideas?”

     Her questions were almost desperate with anticipation and hope, and I felt terrible when I had to let her know that I wasn’t too familiar with the news.

     “Ah, of course.” She said, clearly disappointed. “Of course not. We’re just very far away from the capital you see, and not much news nor modern fashion makes it down this way.”

     “I may not be up on the news, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t seen some new clothes on my way here!” I blurted and hated myself for it.

     “Oh really? Please do tell!”

     I cursed myself for a fool, but I really didn’t want to alienate the first person I had seen in three months who was still breathing. Besides, it wouldn’t do any real harm to talk about fashion, right?

     One the one hand I felt like I was making a huge mistake. If somebody did come down from the capital and the fashions were different, I would be found out. As well, spreading any knowledge from Earth probably wasn’t the best idea. Who knew how it could affect this world? On the other hand, she just admitted that there wasn’t much communication between here and the capital to begin with, and it was just fashion. I wasn’t telling her the secrets of gunpowder or electricity; it wasn’t anything serious.

     Either way I was committed, so with a mental shrug and a sigh, I began talking fashion.

 

--##--

 

     “It’s not that I don’t believe you sirrah, I just find it… hard to fathom. Why would you wear these “shorts” without some kind of stockings to cover your legs?”

     I sighed again, a trait that I was starting to pick up from Ahn’Khareen who apparently had an addiction to the habit. Explaining some of Earth’s fashions to Penelope had been more complicated and frustrating than I had imagined when I started this conversation. The main problem was that I didn’t know any of this world’s current fashion standards, so some of what I explained was already in fashion, or completely out of it, or simply so different that it was hard for her to imagine.

     I tucked my hair back behind my ears in annoyance as it fell in front of my eyes. “Shorts are for when it gets hot, and you don’t want to wear pants because they’re too warm.”

     Penelope frowned. “But why not simply wear a skirt? Besides, stockings let your calves breath as well if they are made correctly. These shorts as you describe are essentially breeches without being fastened below the knee, so why not use those?”

     She stared at her painting easel, which had been repurposed to serve as a fashion catalogue of sorts. I had drawn out several different fashions from Earth, which several of which had already apparently taken root here. For one apparently both men and women commonly wore pants, which had not been the case for women back on Earth for most of history. Also, after some delicate questioning it turned out that underwear on this world was practically the same here as on Earth, except for the lack of any elastics or synthetic fabrics. That would be good for me at least, so I wouldn’t have to wear any loincloths like I had been fearing.

     “Well, men don’t commonly wear skirts where I’m from.”

     “They don’t?” She said, honestly confused. “Are you not from up north? I was taken to understanding that it wasn’t uncommon for men to wear skirts and stockings or long socks?”

     I nearly laughed, then paused as a thought struck me. Wouldn’t that just be a kilt?

     “I guess they do sometimes.”

     “Hm,” she said and tapped a few other sketches we had made. “Regardless of these “shorts”, I see the fashion has changed from having many layers to just the opposite, but in an interesting way. Instead of showing wealth by having a lot of cloth, it seems to have changed to ensuring that everything improper is covered, but only barely so.”

     “Yes, that’s a good way to put it!”

     “Of all of these fashions though, I have to admit these… “hoodies” interest me the most. It almost reminds me of some elven fashions, although I doubt that they would ever be popular amongst the nobility. Still, some of the designers may have taken inspiration from more foreign sources, and it might be better suited for the commoners.”

     It was honestly impressive how much knowledge of fashion I had managed to dredge out of my mind. I had never been one for wearing fancy clothes, jeans, t-shirts, and sweatshirts usually did for me, but my friend Lily in high school had been a fashionista in her own way and had constantly talked about it. Thankfully for me, I guess I was listening more than I thought I had been.

     “Despite your knowledge of modern fashions, you do not seem to follow in their wake.” Penelope said, running an appraising look over my quite plain robe.

     “Ah, that’s more because of a lack of other options.” I said sheepishly, brushing my hair back from around my eyes and ears. “When I began my, I guess you could call it my sabbatical, I didn’t have much other clothing.”

     Leaning over, I tapped one of the sketches she had made representing blue jeans and a t-shirt. “That’s closer to what I used to wear.”

     “Hm. If you say so sirrah.” She continued to watch me for another few seconds, then sighed. “Come here.”

     Confused and a little concerned, I moved a little closer.

     “Turn around.” She demanded, and with even more trepidation I did so.

     She seemed nice enough, quite friendly in fact once it was clear I wasn’t going to harm her, but I didn’t let that stop me from drawing in mana for a spell, just in case.

     “I can tell you haven’t had long hair for long.” She said conversationally, and I heard something rustling from behind me.

     I turned to look, but she turned my head forcibly with her hands.

     “Tsk. Be still.”

     Finally, she seemed to find what she was looking for, and quickly she had gathered up all my hair and was tying it back.

     “Your hair just long enough to be clubbed, thank Ilna.”

     She pulled my hair into a loose ponytail and folded it up onto itself until it was hanging at the nape of my neck, then tied with a ribbon she had pulled from somewhere.

     “There!” She said, satisfied, and I turned back around to face her. “Now you do not look like some common vagabond, much more refined!”

     She beamed at me, and I hesitantly felt at my hair. It did feel better to have it tied up, even if I hadn’t heard of “clubbing” my hair before.

     “Thank you. Really, I mean it, it’s very nice.”

     “Excellent!” Penelope’s smile turned mischievous “You can pay me back next time by telling me what the newest hair styles in the north are.”

      “I… next time?”

     “Of course!” She gestured at the sky. “It’s starting to get dark, if I want to make it home before night I should leave now. Besides, my father would be quite upset with me if I didn’t.”

     I blinked up at the sky that was, indeed, starting to turn orange as the sun slowly set. “Oh, right. You don’t want to be caught out in these woods at night, especially not with the goblins.”

     She froze, staring at me wide-eyed. “Goblins?”

     “Well yeah. When I first arrived here there were a bunch of goblins that chased me down, I barely managed to escape. Did you not know about them?”

      “No.” She said, clearly skeptical. “There have been rumors, but there haven’t been goblins in these parts for years.”

     I frowned. I didn’t know much about my ambushers upon my arrival to this world, and I couldn’t remember if they had a permanent camp or anything. It had been too confusing, too sudden for me to tell.

     “Do you want me to walk you back?” I asked anyways.

     She mulled the question over for a long moment. “I doubt there are actual goblins around, but you would be willing to do that?”

     I nodded and pulled my socks and shoes on. I was long since dry anyways. “Of course.”

     “And if there are goblins?”

     “I can’t promise anything, but I think I should be able to take care of a couple of them.”

     She smiled at me, stood cup, and curtseyed. “Well, you may not be such a vagabond as I first took you to be.”

     “Vagabond?” I tried my best to sound affronted as I stood up myself. “And here I thought I was an honorable naturalist?”

     Her laughter followed me long after I walked her back to the edge of the forest and most of the way to a small village, before she bid me farewell and I made the long voyage back to the lair in darkness. Still, I was comforted by the warmth of her touch, and I couldn’t help but gently feel the ribbon she had tied into my hair.