Hey there voices, you guys just missed out on what Lina calls "Prime Content", but you'll get to hear about it after I explain what happened after that whole dragon business because a lot of things happened. It's actually been three years… just kidding. I felt like being dramatic there for a moment. In reality, it's been two days since June took me. I'm back with Mel and we're on this hill. It's called Melancholy Hill, but here's a neat thing my geography teacher back in Maid School taught: There are ninety-two different hills called Melancholy Hill here in Mendass. It seems a lot of people like being sad on a hill. I'm not sad, though. Mel and I are here for a picnic, which we just had.

Back to catching you up, Lina and Myka returned with Merry, but not Mimi. Apparently, Mimi has married into Trogen royalty, which is kind of wild. Because of that, we'll be going to Trogen next, after… where even are we?

"We're on the border between Bellum and the Zombielands."

Thanks Mel! Speaking of Mel, she's stroking my head right now, and it feels great. So do her thighs… I mean lap. 

"Madeleine, I can feel you squeezing them."

Oh… uh… sorry?

"You can continue."

Coolio. Anyways, back to what I was saying. We're going to Trogen to set up base in another mansion. Hopefully, this one doesn't burn down. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention this, but the mansion that the Sacre Pla royal family let us stay in had burned down. Some random noble pissed off Maxine, so she went crazy all over Sacre Pla. Also, amidst that chaos, the Demon Empress finally managed to recapture Sacre Pla. Man… what world-changing events.

"I'm surprised most of the major events in Mendass aren't caused by us."

I'm not.

"You're terrible at acting surprised."

Insanity has allowed me to peek into the future.

"Yeah, yeah. Can you get me a sandwich? You're closer to the basket, and my legs are asleep."

Aye aye, captain! I reached over to the picnic basket, grabbed out a sandwich, and handed it over to Mel. Now, back to the news. The Shadow Clones have obviously made some progress with the Sacred Power goal, but some have gone beyond that! I don't know how or why, but the Shadow Clones seem to be slowly taking over Mendass. 

Shadow Clone #34 has more or less gotten the Church under her thumb, but I guess that's a given when you're the lover of their Goddess. I will say it was weird getting a personal holographic message from the Cardinal when Mel and I randomly visited a temple to see if we could get married. Oh, don't worry voices, the wedding hasn't happened yet. It'll happen once I find a way to get the Judge of Souls his invite. I did say I'd invite him to my wedding.

"Don't forget my parents and Speedy. I guess we could invite Merida, too."

Shadow Clone #53 has somehow managed to become Queen of the Sky. The birds fear her, the dragons obey her, and the clouds move with the flick of her wrist. She also has a flying train, which is how Mel and I found this nice hill. She was taking us to Trogen when I spotted this hill and wanted to have a picnic on it. By the way, the train conductor really likes locking herself up in her room when she's not conducting. I looked in her room and found this computer setup that reminded me of Mammy. Mel was flabbergasted when she saw it.

"Of course, I'd be confused! How did she get a three-monitor setup here?! How can she even run three instances of Crysis?!"

I have no idea what Mel is saying. The other Shadow Clones have more or less gotten hired by some influential families, so they're not as exciting as 34 or 53. Hmm… what else?

"Have you mentioned the unconscious person next to us?"

"Nope."

"Do you want me to explain it?"

"Hmm… no thanks. You can keep eating that sandwich."

"Got it."

So there's an unconscious person next to us! Why? Because a Shadow Clone came with it over her shoulder and then plopped it down right next to us. By the way, it was Shadow Clone #34. I could tell because the woman who was next to her was blinding.

"Blinded by the lights."

"What do you mean by that, Mel?"

"I just wanted to make a reference."

"Oh… cool."

As for who the unconscious body is, it's Avit, the Goddess of Life. Why is she unconscious? Why was she given to us? What are we supposed to do about her? I have no idea, but it does remind me of a thing one of my Maid School friends said… I didn't have friends in Maid School.

"Don't worry Madeleine, I'm here."

"I know."

Oh yeah, I also looked into Avit's eyes, here's what popped up!

Sure is an ability I'd expect the Goddess of Life to have…

Man, being on a hill really makes you think about life, huh?

"Okay, we're going to stop right there. Get off my lap, Madeleine. We've got to get back on the train and head to Trogen."

"Eh? But your thighs!"

"No buts, and we can continue on the train anyways."

"True! But why now?"

"Because you were about to get philosophical, and philosophy doesn't suit you."

"Hey! I'll have you kno-" And that's when Mel shut me up with a kiss. Welp, guess I'll go back on the train… but first, I need to summon some Shadow Clones to carry the Goddess.

Character profile: Avit

Sacred power: Lifebringer

Favourite God: [DATA MISSING], the God of Death.

Description: The Goddess of Life. Avit is unconscious solely because she's an alcoholic. If your job involves the lives of people in Mendass, you'd be a crippling alcoholic too. Other than that… uh… there's really not much to Avit. She's either piss drunk out of her mind or shaking and crying at her office table because Mendass is too chaotic of a shithole, and no one wants to be her subordinate because the work is hell and her drinking parties are worse.

Chapter reference: On Melancholy Hill by Gorillaz