Yup... I'm screwed...

Is that really Kawākari? Why is he wrapped in ribbons and gagged? No... That can't be him. This must be a dream. That's right! That's what must be it! A dream of my infatuation for him.

I get up and walk over to this Kawākari present.

I sat down close to it to examine it. Rubbing my hand across the hair, it feels soft to the touch.

Soft...

I then begin to poke its cheek and it feels spongy like a real person.

Pudgy...

I then begin to poke where its mouth is covered up. When I did...

"Ouch!!"

It bit me!!!

I slapped it back for revenge. When I did, it sounded really loud and my hand was hurting too. Not only that, but it began to thrash around and yell in a muffled voice. It was only at this moment where I found out that this was really Kawākari and not a dream.

"Ka-Kawākari!?"

He was looking at me with teary eyes.

"Oh my god! It is you!"

I remove the gag in his mouth and he begins to cough up for air.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you. I thought this was a dream."

"You could've *cough* remove the gag first to *cough* check. *cough* *cough*"

I give him a couple of minutes to settle before asking what happened. During those minutes, my phone went off and I went to check. What I saw was the Christmas update for the otome game.

When I loaded up the game, the main menu song played and Kawākari was aware of something and tried to stop me.

"Wait! Don't play the update!! I beg of you!! Don't play it!!"

I was shocked to hear this. The update was almost done and I begin to wonder what he didn't want me to see.

I walk up to him and ask why. He looks away in a flustered manner and doesn't speak.

"Fine. Be like that." I take the gag I took out from his mouth and put it back on him. "Wait here! I'm going to play an update♪"

He yells at me, but all I heard was MMMMM!!

Now what did he not want me to see...

I was going through his route and saw the Christmas update.

"Here it is!! The update!!"

I begin to play through the update and I was impressed and surprised about what it was about.

In the game:
You return back home, to where you and your new love one lives.

Before you left the house, he said he had a present for you when you came back.

Now that you are back home, you wonder what kind of present did he get you.

You step inside and at the door step, you see rose petals going into the house.

Your heart begins to race with excitement as to wonder what he set up for you.

You follow the rose petals to the bedroom and you found a very special, one of a kind present that's only meant for you.

In front of you, he was sitting up in bed, tied up with ribbons and was looking at you with teary eyes.

"I didn't buy you a Christmas present since we're on a tight budget this holiday... But, do I count as one?"

Your heart skipped a beat after seeing his special present for you.

His timidness and shyness excites and tempts you to go over the edge with him.

I stopped it right there and exit the game. I look to where Kawākari was and he looked like he was utterly devastated.

I walked over to him and sat him back up against the wall. Tears were streaming down his cheeks. I sit down on his lap, almost straddling him with my legs. I remove the gag again and wipe away his tears.

"I didn't want you to hear that... I didn't want you to hear that timid side of me."

Hearing his cracked voice for the first time in person, I actually felt bad for him, but this was the very person who I admired the entire time.

I whisper into his ear, "I don't mind hearing you like that. After all, it made you seem even cuter than before."

I move away and plant my hands on his shoulders. I smile at him and decided to do something I should've done since the beginning.

"Hello Kawākari, I'm Airis and I'm a huge fan of your work and voice. It's nice to meet you in person."

He was surprised to hear this from me. He smiles back and said, "Hello Airis, I'm happy to meet a fan of mine in person as well. Thank you for supporting me throughout the game."

"You're very welcome..."

Even though Kawākari is famous now, I still feel close to him. Or rather, even closer to him than usual.

"Hey Kawākari..."

"What is it?"

"Are we still friends?"

"What do you mean by that? Of course we're still friends-"

"But! After that day, I felt so distant from you! Like! We were on the same level all the way, but before I knew it, the gap widen between us and I feel so lost! I don't know what to do anymore! How am I suppose to look at you now? As my best friend? As the voice actor of my virtual boyfriend? As a celebrity? Who are you!"

I plunge my head into his chest and cry it out. I was so confuse about our friendship. Kawākari is my best friend, but once he revealed the fact that he's something more than just a high school student, I feel like I'm not even worth being here with him.

"Hey! Hey! Looks at me Airis. Look at me."

I look at him this time with tears in my eyes.

He was looking at me with very concerned eyes, but at the same time, he was smiling in a gentle way.

"No matter how far I may seem to be away from you. I'm closer than you think. Don't let my accomplishments in life destroy what we created over the years together. You're forever my best friend and it will stay like that."

I grip his shoulders because those words were hurting me.

"That still doesn't change the fact that I feel so far away from you. You're not even in my reach anymore! We're always in hands reach together, but now I feel like there's an ocean or the vast universe separating both of us. I feel lonely."

"You're not lonely! I'm here! You can feel me, right! That means I'm here by your side! I'm here with you! There's no ocean or universe that's separating us! I'm actually here! In your arms! ...Way much more closer to what you're imagining."

He's right... He's in my arms. He's way more closer than I thought. Then why do I feel empty... Should I ask?

"You said you love someone in that text when I made you mad. May I ask who is this lucky person?"

"...I'm sorry I can't..."

"Why not?"

"I just can't..."

"Why can't you tell me!"

"..."

"Kawākari!"

"......"

"Tell me damn it!"

"Fine!! If you want to know why I can't tell you it's because the person who I love won't love me for what I am to her, her best friend! She will love me for being her beloved voice actor in some game who voiced her virtual boyfriend, whom she wants to be with! ...You don't understand and possibly you will never will, but all I wanted her to do was smile. That's all I ever wanted..."

Kawākari... Are you saying... That you fell in love with me...

"Kawākari... I-"

"Please stop already. You said it yourself before I left. It will take some time before you will see me as that. So take your time and allow that to build up."

I clench my teeth together in frustration and all I wanted to do was just punch him. I begin to clench his shirt and try to find a way to convince him.

"This is meaningless. Hurry up and untie me already."

"No... I will never do such a thing. You belong here."

"No I don't. Let me go already."

"I won't!"

"Let me go!!"

"I will never do such a stupid thing like that!!"

"Stupid!! How is letting me go stupid?!"

"Because I love you damn it! I don't want to let go of you!"

"You're in love with Kawākari the voice actor, not Kawākari your best friend!!"

"No! I love both of you!"

"No, you love the voice actor!!"

"Yes, I'm in love with him!"

"So-"

"But my best friend is also someone I love dearly. Please don't let me choose between two different sides, when I know it's just only one person we're talking about. Kawākari... Why can't you accept the fact that I love both sides of you? You're only one person, but you treat yourself as if there were two of you. There's no one else here except for you and I. There's no Kawākari whose my best friend and another Kawākari who's the voice actor I admire and love. All I see is my best friend who I know that does something amazing outside of school and I'm proud of him."

"... Do you really love me?"

"Yes. I do."

"..."

I've rendered him speechless and I took this opportunity to reenact the Christmas special kiss scene in his route.

"Hey Kawākari, I'm so glad I didn't untie you yet."

"Why's that?"

"Because I can do this to you as much as I want to!"

I hold his face in my hand and draw close to him. His head was already hitting the wall so I took that moment to indulge into my best present this year.

He couldn't move anywhere so I didn't hold back on him. I planted one soft kiss on his lips again and again and again.

I stopped for a bit and he said, "You're so mean. Using me like this."

I went back in and said, "It's your fault for giving me such an amazing gift! Just for today, okay? Let me have my way with you."

"Okay then. I'm all yours. Do what you want to me."

"Thanks." I was kissing him as much as I wanted to and I was able control on how I liked it. I pulled back and said, "Kawākari?"

"Yes Airis?"

"I love you so much. And thank you for the best Christmas gift ever."

"Anything to see you smile."

"Yeah right! Hehehe!"