UnfortunateHobbyist

I've paid for another illustration through Pixiv Request for a character in the story. That character hasn't been introduced yet, but I intend to write them some of their own extra chapters to flesh the character out before they become relevant to the story in any way. I just want the artwork beforehand.

Vaqelin broke into cold sweat as he kept forcing himself to remember. It seemed as though his mind was being flooded with memories of his former life. As he kept going through the experience, he explained that for whatever reason, he hadn’t thought too much about those times ever since he reincarnated. He just hadn’t thought who his parents were. Where he lived. How he lived. Not even how he died, the ultimate reason why he finds himself in this world.

General memories of his world came easy. Things about his studies were also easy to remember. How to do basic things as well as more complicated things. It had helped him pick up the language, magic and the various subjects at school. As an aside, he later had found out he had access to some sort of a floating “user interface” that would’ve allowed him to just choose to understand the language and cast spells, but it wasn’t available when he was small. Or maybe it was just impossible to access it.

Can’t say I’ve seen something like that. More proof that I haven’t been “chosen” by a god. Unless there’s some dumb rule attached like having to have your organic eyes to see it or something. But why would they do that?

As he went through his memories, he told us of his demise. He made dark jokes about it at least not being a truck that got him. It had been an explosion of some sort. It was all very sudden. There was absolutely no warning. It just happened. He tried his best to act as if it’s not affecting him, but I could tell. Remembering his own death wasn’t all that pleasant.

At least I didn’t die before when I arrived. Even my arrival wasn’t exactly fun, for sure. It hurt a lot, but I never had to die.

With each memory he recollected, however, he seemed to run into an increasing number of frustrating dead ends. Not everything came to him easily. A lot of the finer details of his former life seem to elude him, like in a haze. At least he can’t remember the finer details of his death, either. It bothers him, but I think it’s also a blessing of sorts. No living person should remember how death feels.

But among the finer details, there were some larger ones as well. Ones you would normally take for granted.

After a while, he had remembered his former last name. Courtois. He simply couldn’t remember his first name. No matter how hard he tried. He couldn’t even remember what he looked like. As if it had been struck from his memory. But he had a lingering feeling he looked very different to how he looks like now. Maybe it actually is a blessing in disguise that he doesn’t remember? Who knows.

“… This worries me, “ he says, placing his hands on the table, “I always thought I remembered everything from before but I didn’t dwell on it too much. I had too much to learn in this world, too much to adjust to. Has my former self started to fade or something? Was my death too traumatic?”

Avilia chimes in. “Or maybe they were wiped on purpose?”

“By my patron? That’s…” A short pause. “That’s possible. The spottiness of my memory in some parts does seem very deliberate. I’m happy about having lost some of them, for sure, but why can’t I remember… Never mind. This is a problem for me to figure out.”

“If you say so,” I respond. “In all honesty, I think you should write down the things you remember. What if slowly forgetting the parts of your old self that aren’t helpful to your new life is just part of the reincarnation process? We have no way of knowing if the summoned heroes suffer from the same problem.”

“Ah, right. What you’re saying is the human mind is malleable and the memory is unreliable. It’s possible. And since there’s no literature on reincarnations, there’s no way to know how my experience compares to that of others.”

I nod. Yes, something to that effect. There’s a reason why I often end up relying on my software to give me a more complete view on my own memories. Not that he needs to know.

“… Thank you for this conversation,” he continues, “It has given me a lot to think about. I’m really sorry about Karine forcing the mantle of a summoned hero on you. I’ll try to support you as much as I can.”

I sigh. “She couldn’t have drawn a bigger target on my back if she tried. I would’ve liked she had told me she was doing to pull that stunt beforehand!”

“You would’ve told her not to do it, right?”

“Of course! It’s a lie! I can’t fill the shoes of a summoned hero. And I don’t need that kind of attention!”

“I understand. Before I found out no one knows about reincarnations, I was afraid of being outed as some sort of a summoned hero myself instead of being allowed to live my life the way I have. But I doubt Karine did it to send you on dangerous quests like summoned heroes normally are.”

That doesn’t make me feel any better, now does it!

-*-*-*-*-

Having left Vaqelin in the room to his thoughts once the conversation was finished, Avilia and I were now standing behind the door to the meeting room.

I really need to talk to Karine.

I open the door, and Avilia goes in first with me after her.

Karine is there, alone, sitting in one of the chairs on the side facing towards the door. She looks tired. But that changes nothing.

“Oh you two,” she says, “How’d it go?”

“Fine,” I say with a somewhat resentful tone, “But that’s not what I want to talk about.”

“Oh?”

I walk up to the table and place my right hand on it.

“I can’t believe you lied about me being a summoned hero.”

“I’m sorry about that. But we need someone to rally behind. And there’s no better candidate than you. You see, I’m not entirely convinced you aren’t here for...”

I shake my head. “Seriously? And what in the world possessed you to think that?!”

“I’m sorry! I I couldn’t think of anyone else as fitting for the job. I can’t shake the feeling that you’re still...”

“You’re sorry? You’re trying to ruin my life, and you’re sorry?”

“What? No! That’s not what…”

“It’s not? Why the hell would you make up such a lie otherwise? Heroes are summoned to fight in wars, right?!”

“… Yes. But I have no intention…”

“Sure, you say you don’t, but what about the others?!”

“The others have no say in it.”

“Can you promise me that? Can you really promise that? Or are you just lying to me? Are you sure they won’t demand some sort of proof of me being a summoned hero, some sort of a display of power?”

“I’m certain,” she says with an exasperated voice, “They accepted your retrieval of my family’s heirloom from the town as proof enough. And the fact that I’m now openly siding with them. It’s undeniable that your arrival here has put things in motion. And that you obviously aren’t just some local pretending to be different.”

“So what’s the point of making them think I’m one, then?”

“As I said, we need someone to rally behind. Other mages might rally behind me, but what about others? They just see me as a spoiled daughter of a rich merchant family. But you? You strike a very different image.”

“And you don’t think them thinking I’m an ELF might cause problems?”

“Not at all,” she says and shakes her head. “If anything, that’ll work in our advantage. Who better to fan the righteous flames of rebellion than someone ostracized by the current regime? And stands for justice and the will of the people?”

“You do realize that no matter how you spin it, I can’t trust you anymore? And none of this changes the fact that this is all based on a lie.”

“I’m sorry you feel that way. But I didn’t see any other way to do this. Had I told you ahead of time, you would’ve just said no, right?”

“Of course!”

“See? And this is before you even hear what I intend to offer you in exchange for your cooperation.”

What? What does she think could entice me to take part in her little charade?

“You see, I know how precious your arms are for you. Before we strike out, I intend to make you a pair myself. So you don’t have to risk the ones you use now. They seem rather intricate in their make. Quite irreplaceable.”

What?!

“… You can do that?”

She nods. “I’m confident I can. I learned quite a bit from working on your arms.”

Okay. That does change things a bit. If I could remove my arms and legs as something that uses power entirely… It’d go a long way to help me survive.

“Could you do the same for my legs?”

She looks surprised. “Your legs?”

I nod.

“I don’t see why not. I’d need to see how they connect to your body first.”

“And while you’re at it, could you do the same procedure to my legs you did to my arms?”

“Yes, I’m confident I could.”

I calm down a bit and sit down.

“You see, as I was trying to say, I’m not entirely convinced you aren’t here for a reason. You might not be a regular summoned hero, but maybe you’re something new? A hero for a new age, or something?”

“That makes no sense.”

“Just think about it. Why are you here? Why did you appear in that particular town, in this time?”

“Due to an accident and a few coincidences?”

“That’s one way to look at it. Obviously you are here due to an accident. But what if you appearing in this location, at this time, wasn’t a coincidence?”

I stare at her. It does seem this is something she honestly thinks could be true.

“So you think me stumbling on your documents for you was the will of some higher being?” I scoff at the thought. “Anything’s possible. The Moon could be made of cheese, too.”

She sighs. “Laugh all you want. I just want you to think about it.”

I turn to look at Avilia, who’s been quiet all our conversation. She smiles at me.

Well, at least I now know why Karine did it.