Side not: What’s normally italicized is in these ‘ ‘ it has to do with writing programs I am using, usually I edit but I’m just barely writing atm so I am not for now.

Indra downed another specially concocted medicine she had made for herself out of the remnants of her travel mixers. Slyly, she’d been gradually making one for Hawke. Having the words in braille rather than written out made it easier for her to keep her illegal drugs under the radar. The sector declared them illegal ten years back because they were ‘too efficient’ and would cause problems with the economy. More like they were a medical advancement everyone wanted to bury to keep the money tucked into the pockets of the wealthy. That was how it always worked, wasn’t it? Bending the rules to continue to feed into the higher level of society. Indra curled her lip in disgust. 

The neck brace stood only as an adornment at this point in time. Indra had no intention of letting them know what she was doing. Then again, wasn’t her and Hawke’s rescue illegal? It wasn’t like Hao would go: Oh well, now that you’ve been carrying illegal drugs my conscience is troubled and I can’t protect you. And if she did, Indra could run. Hawke couldn’t but now that she was doing better she could drag him. This territory was familiar. Indra could get home from here. 

Unless that was what Hao wanted.

What if this was all a ruse to get Indra to lead the commander’s straight to Akio? If they hadn’t found her already. It wouldn’t be the first time a friendly face had been a mask of deceit. Indra poured one more bottle into the cocktail for Hawke and did a theatrical performance of struggling to walk, just in case someone was watching as she made her way toward his bed. This would get him well enough to walk—but, nothing in her bag would bring back his sanity. That would take time to heal. She’d go over with him all the grounding exercises that occasionally worked for her. Everything was a process and walking forward from this level of trauma would be a long one. 

Indra put a hand on Hawke’s arm. He twitched. She jolted back, her heart skipping a beat. It was okay. He was sedated. He wasn’t going to hurt her. Unless, what they used on him was for humans. Hawke clearly wasn’t one but the knowledge of Harken’s was very little. Indra and Haim had searched nearly every library in the galaxy in search of just the tiniest bits of information to help them make suppressors. Clearly, that knowledge had an expiration date. Indra knew Hawke was still taking them, the problem was they had stopped working. Now, all they could do was wait and see what this new part of Hawke would be. 

Grabbing a syringe, Indra put a good amount of the concoction in Hawke’s IV. 

“What are you doing?” Hao asked, her voice short. 

Indra cleared her throat. “He needed another dose of pain meds, I was—“

“Thinking you could lie to someone who reads your mind.” 

Ah. Indra had almost forgotten that Hao was just as invasive as Haim. Starshit. 

“If what you’re using helps, I have no qualm with you using it. But I’d rather you weren’t skulking about like you’re assembling a bomb to explode yourself and us as a consequence. Understood?” Hao asked, matter of fact, no indicator in her voice to showcase what she was feeling on way or another. 

“Understood, Cap,” Indra said with a mock salute. 

Hao groaned and walked away, her footsteps retreating into another room a good distance away. 

“I feel so helpless,” Indra whispered, moving to smooth Hawke’s roughly cut hair out of his face, only to find it so short it was no more than fuzz on her fingertips. That was right. They have to cut it for the surgery, he wasn’t going to be happy about it, but what else were they supposed to do? Risk getting his long locks in his brain? He’d deal with it. 

“I wish I could help you, wish I could fix this, fix everything but—I’m not Haim, I’m not some gifted gebul with mind reading and repairing powers.” Indra swallowed. A stabbing pain in the back of her head pounded into a headache founded in heartache. “That;s why he chose Akio over me, isn’t it?” Indra gripped the bedsheets in her hands until they shook. “Because I’m heartless. Selfish. I didn’t care about Akio’s feelings, I left her. I left everyone.” 

If Hawke were awake, Indra knew he’d argue, he’d thank her. He’d say ‘If you left I would be dead.’ Or he’d say ‘I wish you’d let me die.’ Perhaps she should have. With everything he would face for the rest of his life, it was selfish of Indra to keep him alive. What if Hawke didn’t want to be? 

“Akio is everything I’m not. She’s caring, she always knows what to say, what to do, when to give hugs and—“ Indra bit her lip. “I miss her. I wish she was here. I wish she was holding me, telling me that—“ Indra held back a sob. “Telling me that you’re going to be okay, that we’re going to be okay. I want her to lie to me and mean it.” 

Crackles of communications inn the other room pricked at Indra’s ears. She held her breath for a moment and slowed her breathing to be the quietest it could. 

“Slow down, what happened, B?” Hao’s voice gently cooed. 

“It’s Eris—she set off the bomb and ran, I don’t know where she is,” a familiar voice crackled over the radio. 

Indra clenched her jaw. Bolivar. The traitor. Eris was alive, that was good to hear but where was she? And how much longer would it remain that way? 

Standing up, Indra walked around the room, her footfalls no more than a brush of a ghost against the floor. She listened, nothing. No one was here. It was just her, Hawke, and Hao. Indra gripped her cane tightly and removed the neck brace. 

“I warned you that she would be a loose end. I told you what was to be done. Tie it up. The Commander is on the planet now. If he hears of your failure, you won’t be enjoying the remaining year of your life,” Hao spat, her tone taking on a gentle annoyance. 

“I—I can’t,” Bolivar said, followed by a long silence. 

Indra drew her sword in time with the crackles of static. 

Hao growled. “Are you saying you’re incapable? I will send a weapon after her, be grateful I’m your middle ground. Find a new place to set up base and carry out the instructions I gave you. Out.” 

The device clicked off. 

Gritting her teeth, Indra waited for Hao to move, preparing to match her. She knew Hao worked for the Commander, and that this rescue was out of guilt but this—Indra couldn’t stand ideally by while her friend, her family was being hunted. 

“You don’t want to do this,” Hao stated bluntly. 

Indra’s arm moved without her consent, pressing her own blade into her throat. “What the starshit—“ 

Hao’s helped shoes clicked across the pavement toward her. “Indra. I did all of this for you. I’m risking my ‘life’ and sanity for you and Hawke. Now, you try to stab me in the back? I told you to choose who you saved.”

Her scaled hand settled on Indra’s shoulder. “You chose.”

The more Indra pulled at her blade to remove it from her throat, the more it pressed in, causing blood to trickle down her chest. “I can’t choose between family.” 

Hao stepped back, her control temporarily wavering. 

Indra whipped around, stabbing her in the gut. 

Hao gasped. 

Sharp claws ripped into Indra’s forearm. “Trust no one. I was conditioned to trust ‘no one’, and I trusted you! I trusted you because the Se’li I loved—because Akio loved you!” Hao wrapped her claws around Indra’s forearm and threw her backwards with an abnormal amount of force. 

Indra slammed into the wall, her shoulder cracking on impact. She screamed, falling forward. 

Weapon. 

Hao was a weapon. 

How could Indra have been so stupid?

Wheezed breathing echoed in the emptiness while frantic beeping begin to fill what had once been a peaceful silence. What had been safe, turned feral. 

Indra staggered to her feet, blood filling her mouth from whatever internal damage Hao had caused. “Did you really trust me?  Or was this the last chance to redeem your conscience?” Spitting out the blood, she listened for Hao’s movements, calculating her next strike. That was—if Hao didn’t try to control her again. If she did, this fight was already over. Indra lost.

A squelch of flesh and hum of weaponry sounded above the machines. Hao’s status as a weapon was confirmed. There was no way Indra could win. 

But she had to. 

For her. 

For Hawke. 

For Akio. 

For family. 

Indra dodged the first swing, falling directly into another that cut into her thigh. Sharp, burning pain tugged at her weary body, beckoning her to give up. To curl up now and take death swiftly. Stars what a wimp her conscience was. 

The next swing missed. 

Indra parred the third, the force of the hit snapping her wrist. 

Hao was too strong and she was angry. 

Indra needed distance, she needed to be smart she needed—

Blinding pain shattered her spine, bringing her to her knees. 

The sword fell from Indra’s hand, clattering on the floor. 

A zing proceeded two sharp objects being placed to her throat. 

“I told you, you shouldn’t have done that. I’m a weapon, Indra, you’re nothing more than a Se’li with a severe disadvantage,” Hao hissed. “I’m surprised you haven’t died yet with the attitude you have.” Hao dropped the blades. “I won’t kill you, but I won’t save you either. Suffer for your choices, idiot.” 

The beeping of the machines turned into a single line. 

Hawke. 

Hao yipped, turning the room to silence. 

Strong arms pulled Indra to her feet, placing a concoction to her lips with trembling hands. “Home.” Hawke’s voice was gruff, deeper and more gravelly than it had been before. 

“We can’t go home,” Indra whispered. “They’ll follow.” She drank the medicine, instantly relieved as the warmth trickled through her injuries and began to mend them. 

The familiar clank of metal entered the warehouse. Really? As if this day couldn’t get any better. Indra retrieved her sword. “If you come a step closer, I will kill you.” 

“Indra, I made a mistake, I shouldn’t have—I thought they were going to protect us, but they didn’t, they lied,” Bolivar cried. “Please—“ He clanked, probably falling to his knees in some dramatic display Indra couldn’t see to scoff at. “I don’t expect to be forgiven. But let me make amends, please. I need your help.” 

Hawke laughed darkly, causing a chill to travel down Indra’s spine. “Oh, that’s rich cousin. Why don’t you go fuck up someone’s life and then come back asking them to help ‘you’. Fuck. The. Starshit. Off.” 

“We need to save Eris,” Bolivar pleaded. “I don’t want her to die, that’s why I hid her away.” 

Indra scoffed, moving toward Bolivar and whacking him with her cane. A sharp crack echoed through the empty warehouse. “You’d let everyone else die. Traitor.” She turned back to Hawke. “Not making a good case, is he?” 

“Nope,” Hawke spat. 

“What do you want me to do?” Bolivar asked, grabbing Indra’s hand. “I’ll do anything.”

Smacking him away, Indra snarled. “Get off your sorry ass and save her yourself.”