After spending the first day… indulging, I used my laptop to look for a job the next morning. There weren’t a lot of choices and I wasn’t sure what qualifications I needed, so went for a waitressing job to start with. That was how I got through college. The application didn’t ask me for any details, filling itself in. Right after I sent it, a notification told me I had a new email, which was my schedule and the location.

It really was heaven, I thought.

Looking at the schedule, I worked weekends, but had Monday and Wednesday off. Today being Wednesday, I realized I wouldn’t get a break for a while, so decided to make the most of today, settling in for a lot of gaming.

In the afternoon, Freya called to ask if she could come over.

“Sure,” I said.

“Great. I’ll be there in a minute,” she said, sounding happy.

I smiled, idly thinking if I had any snacks for her. It felt like, exactly a minute later, the doorbell rang.

“Right on time,” I said, opening the door.

She stepped inside with a smile.

Soon enough, she was watching me play again—I really needed to use my first pay to get another chair. It was just as fun, great hearing her gasps and shouts, feeling her hand move around by my ear as she aggressively pointed where she spotted someone. Distracting in the nicest way. I liked playing seriously, but I liked the company too.

Because of the time, she joined me for dinner. I felt like I’d mess up if I made anything fancy, and I didn’t have much in my fridge, so we just had grilled cheese sandwiches. She said it was her favorite, no reason to overthink it.

I let her sit afterwards—couldn’t make my guest stand for hours—and she played the puzzle game, my turn to point at the screen and give hints.

By the time she was ready to leave, I felt great, and I felt she was great. There was a sense of closeness, like we were friends. But I did wonder if she wanted more. It was subtle, the way she looked at me so bright, how she touched my arm a lot when we talked, standing close to me.

I tested the water. “Thanks, I haven’t had this much fun since I broke up with my last girlfriend.”

She didn’t frown or step back or anything like that. “I had fun too,” she said.

As I said goodbye, I leaned in to pat her elbow and she didn’t seem to mind, still smiling.

My thoughts lingered on her for the rest of the evening. Before going to bed, I set my alarm clock, then snuggled in. After a while, I glanced at my chest of drawers and licked my lips.

“No, you have work tomorrow,” I mumbled to myself.

The next day, I went to my waitressing job. It was easy enough, other waitresses around and the place wasn’t overwhelmed with customers at any time, handling it well. I was even paid by the day, so I could order a chair as soon as I got home. One thing that was strange, the other waitresses all talked about auditions. Well, that was a Hollywood cliché, aspiring starlets working tables until they had their big break.

I wasn’t interested in that, so focused on my work.

Another perk, the place only served breakfast and lunch, closing at three. No rush to get home, I loosely followed the GPS on my phone as I looked around. The architecture all seemed modern, not too ugly, not anywhere I recognized. The streets were clean, air too. A nice place to live.

At home, I used my pay to order a chair and food. Like last time, it all arrived within the hour, very convenient. Freya didn’t call again, but the new chair wasn’t entirely a waste, more comfortable than my camping chair.

Although I had plenty of time, I didn’t want to spend every day gaming. Going back to the job website, I checked out more of them, not entirely understanding the requirements. “A logical brain? Decent social skills?” I muttered.

Once I was well and truly cooked, I noticed a help section, so checked that.

“Improve your logic skills by playing chess, puzzle games, or reading murder mysteries? Improve your social skills by practicing talking in the mirror?” I mumbled.

It wasn’t exactly wrong, but it wasn’t right either, and I was already drained from trying to work out the requirements for other jobs. Giving up on making sense of it all tonight, I just looked for the job I wanted.

Conservationist stood out to me, but we were in a city, not sure if that was right for me. I mentally favorited it, moving on for now. Gardener was maybe better. I had experience in office settings, so maybe a business career until I had some savings. Or tech support—it looked like it promoted into a programming role and I had learned to script to make mods for games.

Head full of thoughts and ideas, I left it there for the day and came back to it after work the next day. Tech support definitely looked like the best option. Long hours and good pay, so I could make money quick. It was even for a game company. If I did get promoted, maybe I could make my own game one day. I had heard the industry was tough, taking advantage of young people’s passion to overwork them, but I thought heaven would be different.

I didn’t like taking a job and quitting so soon, so I worked until Sunday afternoon. The boss said it was fine for me to quit immediately, no notice required, apparently common for waitresses to pass auditions and quit.

The tech support job also took Mondays off, so I started Tuesday. It was like going back in time, squeezed into a cubicle in an air-conditioned office, too cold with my jacket off, too hot with it on. At the least, the customers weren’t too rude. Angry, upset, but not abusive and none of them threw around slurs.

At the end of the day, I went home with double the pay of my waitressing job. Mentally tired instead of physically tired, I had the energy to spend some time with my vibe, my mood perking right up for the evening.

Since I started working, Freya hadn’t visited. I took the time to call her, chatting for an hour, not really saying anything, but feeling great by the time we hung up.

A simple life, yet nice.

After working for a week, I splurged out on furniture, making my apartment more like a home. Couch, dining table and chairs for two, comfier bed, microwave. There was even a service that took away unwanted furniture and sold it, getting a little back from the old bed and camping chair and table. The only thing missing was a gaming PC, but it was pointless until I saved up. No reason to waste money upgrading over and over. Once I had a good one, then I just needed to keep it up to date.

That had kept me too busy to notice anything was wrong. However, I had Sunday off, so invited Freya in the morning. She agreed.

“I missed you,” I said, letting her in.

“Me too,” she said, smiling.

It was normal enough at the start. She noticed the new things, excited about them. I thought it was a bit much, but it was cute, seeing her fussing over a dining table. I thought that, maybe, she was looking forward to sitting down and eating together. Honestly, I would’ve found it a slog to visit someone and have to eat standing up.

With the laptop on the dining table, we gamed until lunchtime, then ate while watching another video of kittens playing. Afterwards, I asked her if she wanted to game some more.

“I like slow and peaceful games,” she said.

Hearing that mentally jerked me. Déjà vu. “I know,” I said, distracted.

Nothing else like that happened, but I couldn’t settle down. The first thread was unravelling.

After thinking about it all night, I invited her over again the next day. This time, I really paid attention to what we talked about, noticing how shallow it was. “You said grilled cheese sandwiches are you favorite, right? What cheeses d’you like in them?”

She shrugged and said, “I don’t mind.”

Wrong.

I asked a few other things, then finally broke. “If you don’t mind me asking, how did you die?”

“I’m not sure what you mean? Aren’t I alive?” she said, frowning.

This wasn’t heaven.

Not at all.

Over the week, I listened to the callers at work, how they made no sense. Everything slowly turning into gibberish. Day after day, then my day off again. I called Freya over. She smiled at me, asked me simple questions. It didn’t matter what answer I gave. Sure, she could say something that made sense, but her reaction was… shallow. Words and expression, but no meaning.

“Well, I hope you cheer up,” she said, patting my elbow.

I lowered my head, licked my lips. It finally clicked. “Can I hug you?” I asked.

“Sure,” she said.

I held her tight, patted her back, then stepped back. “Can I hug you?” I asked.

“Sure,” she said, same tone, same expression.

Like she was a robot. Like she was a Sim.

My feelings were out of control, lonely, afraid, full of this inexplicable dread. Since I now knew, I asked her to hug a few times, then told a few flirty jokes, then gave her flirty touches, then finally asked, “Can I kiss you?”

She looked around shyly, then said, “Sure.”

I leaned in, desperate. I needed to connect to her, to feel like she was real, like she was human.

But the moment our lips touch, I was overwhelmed with disgust. Disgusted at myself. I pulled away, her expression still the same, softly smiling, blushing—unable to read my reaction that wasn’t programmed into this twisted game-like reality.

“You should go,” I whispered.

“Sure,” she said, smiling.

I was never going to invite her over again.

The laptop my only distraction, I sat down and opened it. No matter how long I played, though, I couldn’t forget, couldn’t shake that sense of dread. Eventually, I stopped playing and just sat there. Maybe for an hour, I stared, trying not to think.

But I had to think.

My next move, I opened up the shopping website and put a bunch of wine into the cart. Just that, I remembered something that went well with wine, going to the “health and wellbeing” section. At the end of the categories, like someone had loaded in a smutty mod, was the adult toys category.

I had money. Not enough for the crazy stuff, but still good stuff. A set of butt plugs, tentacle dildo, vibrating nipple clamps, bottle of lube. Something for everywhere.

Half an hour later, my doorbell rang.

I drank a few chugs of wine first, then warmed up in the shower, the weak spray tickling my pussy while I squeezed my boobs. Absentmindedly thought I should get a better shower.

Then I went to my bed, naked.

With a little rubbing and pinching, my nipples were hard, ready to put the clamps on. I gasped, painful at first. Painful, but good, especially once I turned them on. So sensitive, I had to just sit there and breath carefully for a bit. If I moved too quickly, it was like I reset, the sensation too much to handle again.

I wasn’t used to toys other than vibes. They did the job and I wasn’t usually single for that long or could find someone for a fling.

But this was nice. More like what I was used to. Having sex, I liked my partner playing with my nipples. As I got used to it, my breaths were deeper, hotter, and I felt my pussy tremble.

I picked up the butt plug, not much wider than my thumb. Never did anal before. I had a girl ask, but I was too worried, thinking I needed an enema first. Too much of a hassle by myself.

But now I only had myself.

I coated it in lube, then gently pressed it. From what I remembered hearing over the years, I was supposed to relax, but I didn’t exactly know how to relax my asshole. I wasn’t in a rush. Slowly pressing it, breathing in and out, resisting the urge to clench, until it finally slipped in.

When it did, it felt incredible and weird at the same time. I had to calm down for a second, feeling like I needed to poop, but then there was just this tingling and a sense of doing something wrong—something naughty. Giddy, I gently swirled it a bit, my asshole still not comfortable with it, the strange feelings mixing with my horniness, pussy clenching, dribbling.

I turned my attention to the dildo. Already so horny, I didn’t hesitate, quickly lubed it up, then pressed it against my entrance. It was a little big and long, but tapered, the tentacle’s end like a fingertip. Even if it was bigger, I was so wet.

It went in easily and I gently slid more and more in. Fuck, it felt good, the little suckers such a weird sensation against my insides. And the noises—squelching. It sounded so hot. I slid in as much as I comfortably could, not that much since I was only used to fingers and a vibe, but just looking down and seeing it, seeing that tentacle inside me—fuck.

And I wasn’t expecting it at all, but, once enough of the dildo was in, I felt it press against my butt plug. That set off my asshole again, clenching. My whole area down there sort of spasming as the sensations rolled through me, set off each other, set me off more.

I’d done a lot, but not much actual masturbating, yet I was already so close. Below my stomach, that warm and floaty feeling. Senseless. I didn’t really think any more, couldn’t think any more, just looked at whatever and my hands moved.

Slowly, I slid the tentacle in and out, over and over, squelching, squirming, my muscles constantly tensing up. I licked my lips, looked at my vibe. One hand kept moving the dildo, the other held my vibe in place, touching my clit through the hood.

It was too much the second the vibe touched, but my hand wouldn’t move it away. Desperate, I kept fucking my pussy, curling up, hoping my butt plug wouldn’t fall out, nipples tingling, all those electric feelings coursing through me, mixing together.

And the feeling below my stomach swelled, hotter and hotter, reaching a bursting point and—

I shuddered, then collapsed, dildo sliding out, vibe falling onto the bed, but the nipple clamps kept buzzing, butt plug still in. Again and again, my entire body tensed up, wave after wave of pleasure following, mind a blur, blissed out. My nipples were too sensitive at first, but I couldn’t move to take off the clamps, had to suffer, tears in my eyes as I could barely breathe. Then that passed and the tingling numbed, finally able to take shaky breaths.

After that, I just lay there, soaking in the pleasure. I felt so good. So human.

For now.