Chapter 4: Tia
I sneezed as the cold air tickled my neck. I had my hair cut to the shortest the hairdresser was willing to do to a woman. She was hesitant, of course, when I asked for it specifically. No woman would cut all of their hair if not suffering from matted hair or lice, the hairdresser said. No matter what social status a woman, hair was still one of the defining pride of womanhood.
But that was the reason I’ve decided to cut my hair. To shed all her lingering pride. To finally kill the woman that was Resolutia. Now, only Tia remained.
The hairdresser bought my hair - she said they're too nice to trash and would make wigs out of it. I had no idea that was how they made wigs so I just accepted it. The woman also gave me some commoner's clothes to change out of the maid uniform I stole. She didn't asked question, just nodded when I requested them.
After parting from the coach that supposed to take me to the next town, just an hour after I feigned to have forgotten something at the Capital, I was left by the roadside. The coachman tried to stop me as I told him that will be walking back, but I assured him I will stick to the paved road. The sun was still pretty high too, so he left after warning me not to wander off the road.
I walked back to toward the Capital but turned at the first fork on the road towards an old dirt path. The sign said it lead to the village of Drell. I am not aware of such a village, nor I had any knowledge of the world aside to decorate myself with vanity. They were not important to Resolutia. All she wanted to do was being married to the Prince Alex and became his Queen. Resolutia never thought of the responsibility that might came with being a Queen, except that she could do anything she wanted as Queen.
I involuntarily shivered at the thought of Prince Alex. Of how he lured her in his trap with praises I believed was reserved just for me. How he advised me how to further strengthen my rank within the Rose. How he said he would be relying on me to be his strongest support.
Then he just tossed me aside like trash.
No. I had always been trash in his eyes. I just refused to believe it. I really thought I could change his mind.
Chasing away those terrible memories, I made my way towards that village of Drell.
It wasn’t a long walk, but the condition of the road did made it harder to travel by foot. The shoes I wore was the most comfortable I had but it wasn't made to be walked with. A stroll in the garden would be fine, but not for outdoor use. The small bag that I took from my house started to feel heavy in my grip. It only has two pair of clothes, some extra socks, and my purse where I keep the money I had with me. I felt discouraged when I packed them yesterday, realizing I knew nothing about how to be a commoner. All my life, I had been served and pampered, surrounded by luxury paid by my Father.
But staying was not an option. I had to do this.
Taking my time, I studied the view in front of me. The old road was a narrow, bordered by the open field that eventually will drop to a cliff with the sea underneath. While on the other side was the sparse trees that connect to the edge of the Capital. I wondered if there would be dangerous animals here, but I told myself that it would be fine since it was still noon. A bit thoughtless of me, but that was the limit of common sense Resolutia used to have. Now as Tia, I had no choice but to learn it by experience.
Looking at the sun already slanted towards the west, it was the time Lily was supposed to come and wake me up. I placed those letters in easy view, so there’s no way she would miss seeing them. I wrote one for Father, one for Diana, and one for Nora.
To Father, I thanked him for always listening to my childish demands. He was a good man, but a bit of a pushover. My mother, Selena, had always shared her ways to control her husband with me, since I was the only one who wanted to listen. Nora never liked Mother. She probably learned far early that that was not a nice thing to do, to control your spouse with threats and demands.
To Diana, I conveyed my late congratulation to her marriage with Father. I didn’t particularly hate her, but she were never affected by how rude I was to her. She simply saw me as an undisciplined child, one she would try to straighten out but didn’t because it would be beyond her boundary as the stepmother. I don't think I ever talked to her at all.
To Nora…
My feet stopped. A dread overcame my head and made it hard for me to breathe. I had left in order to run away from the summon to the Rose Castle. Nora would be named, but Resolutia would demanded it to be changed. I would voluntarily made my way to the Rose, making enemies with the other candidates, trying my best to latch myself to the Prince. That was how it supposed to be!
The Rose would be a place bathed in blood and schemes. And I was sending my sister to such a place.
But…
What was the accepted amount of selfishness a person was allowed to admit? I don’t want to repeat the ‘future’ the Goddess had shown me. I don’t want to be Prince Alex’s pet again. I don’t want to kill all those women in the Rose.
But...
I also don’t want to leave Nora to that kind of place. She would survive better, perhaps, since Nora was far more clever and wilful. But there were no shortage of such a person in the Rose, and all of them perished by the prolonged and ruthless fight for the Prince’s favor. Eventually, only the most selfish and heartless would survive. One who was just as terrible as the Master of that Hell.
Tears fell down my eyes as I buckled and dropped to my knees on the uneven ground. I left my sister to such a monster. It was supposed to be me. Would it have been better if I were to take her place and let myself be murdered by jealousy of the other candidates? Like how the 'future' is supposed to be?
Should I turn back now? Should I just accepted my fate to die in the Rose?
No. I don’t want to die. Not now that the Goddess had gave me another chance.
Gripping my hands tight to my chest, I prayed hard, but not to the Goddess.
Please forgive me for being so selfish, Nora, but I wanted to live too.
“Are ‘ya alright there, Missy?”
I looked over my shoulders to see a rickety old cart being pulled by a messy piebald. The one who spoke was an old man with a few missing teeth at the front, holding the reins. I wondered if those old eyes could still see at all, but he did saw me so it must have.
A little boy no older than 5 jumped down from the back of the cart and came towards me. He held out his hand to show a piece of caramel candy, half melted in his palm. I wondered if I should take it.
“Tony! Don’t give people somethin’ that was once in ‘ya mouth, ‘ya brat!”
The boy grinned mischievously. He clearly did tried to purposely give me something half eaten. I politely refused him and he just shrugged and pop it back into his mouth. The way he smiled in glee made me a bit curious if I should accept it. I liked caramel candy too.
The old man had left his cart by then, and knelt beside me. It was weird to see how genuinely worried he was for a stranger like me?
“Are ‘ya hurtin’ anywhere? Do ‘ya want help, Missy?”
“No, I’m fine. I just remembered something… awful.”
I said as I stood up again while holding his bony hands as support. I must have knelt there for some time, my feet had fallen asleep and was shaking.
“Ah me old Da’ used to have that too. He joined the war, ‘ya see, when he came back ‘ome, he always get the Ghost. Da’ would cry for no reason. Da’ finally jumped off the cliff into the sea, trying to escape the Ghost.”
It was such a dreadful memory, but this old man told them with a smile in his face. Was it because he was overly friendly, or the memory had already been too long in the past to remember how sad it used to be?
“I… don’t think it’s something similar, but I thank you for your concern. I’m sorry to hear that about your father.”
“Ah don’t be, Missy. Da’ was not a good man to me or to Ma’ anyway. No one missed him when he’s gone.”
No one would miss a bad person when they’re gone... Would my family forget about me this easily as well?
“Are ‘ya headin’ to Drell, Missy? I can give ‘ya a ride.”
The boy named Tony immediately hopped back into the cart when he heard this and waved his tiny sticky hands for me to follow him. To the old man, I accepted his kindness and got up into the cart. Tony sat beside me, looking up with a big smile.
“I’m Tony. I’m six.”
He said while showing his five fingers. He stopped to count, then add another two fingers in his other hand. I smiled at him.
“Hello, Tony. I’m Tia.”
Slowly, the cart traveled the uneven dirt path towards the end of the road.
My journey as Tia would now start.
I am a fan of how the story is changing so much from her past life. Most of these types of 'Went back in time before I was evil' or ' Reincarnated as an evil person' stories will still follow the same structure with the same environments and characters. But here we have the MC almost immediately disowning her luxurious life and trying to live alone.
I am curious as to how the family will react when they find her and that she's been living as a commoner.
Thanks for the chapter!
I think she couldn't really have done anything in regards to the rose. She could take her sister's place, but that had already been done and the result was pretty bad. She doesn't have any control over the rose nor the authority, so either way, better to try another way: aka, let Nora try her hand with that place. Maybe she'll keep her wits about her and listen to the advice in regards to the prince.