Bob walked into a supply fort a bit past the border between the Atrien Kingdom and the Dark Lord’s Realm. Inside, undead, orcs, and goblins were carrying crates to and fro, supervised by dark sorcerers and dark elves. Adoel followed in complete silence, her eyes unfocused, staring blankly forward as she slouched over in the air.

Bob made his way into the central structure until he came to a large office. Sitting at a desk was Londibni, her forehead furrowed as she scribbled away. He could barely see her past the mountains of documents on her desk.

 

“Londibni.”

 

She slowly looked up as he walked towards her desk and gave him a tired smile.

 

“Hello Bob, anything to report?”

 

Bob shrugged.

 

“The Grand Alliance is still bickering, frontlines haven’t moved appreciably, and the Hero Princess is still tearing through the realm.”

 

Londibni heaved a sigh and massaged her temples.

 

“I told General Jreghug that we need to try and contain her. But no. ‘How much can one little human girl do?’ he said. ‘Just ignore her, the real fight is ahead’ he said. And now she’s demolishing our rear areas, disrupting our supply routes, and isolating our weaker forces to boost her levels. But that stupid orc doesn’t care about anything besides the frontlines, so of course he just complains that the food is late without realizing that’s because he’s letting an elite team rampage unchecked along the exact route said food is supposed to travel. And then he told me to ‘handle it’. Just what am I supposed to do with a handful of logistics units against a monster like that? I haven’t even been in the field since the war started and he dumped all the ‘dumb paperwork’ on me! Even you’re going to pass me in levels at this rate! What level are you now anyways, Bob?”

 

Bob checked his status.

 

“59 now.”

 

“See? And the hero’s going to be growing even faster! It won’t be long before she’s pounding on my door!”

 

“Well, I think I have a plan for that. I just need your signature here…”

 

Londibni signed and stamped the paper before Bob even finished.

 

“Do it. If you can fix this situation, then I don’t care about the details.”

 

“...got it. I’ll do my best.”

 

“Please.”

 

Bob walked out of the room and shook his head. He had wanted Londibni’s cooperation, yes, but she hadn’t even bothered to read the document before signing. Work stress is scary.

 

---

 

A few days later Bob strolled back towards Londibni’s office. He had barely knocked once when the door flung open and a teary-eyed Londibni grabbed him by the shoulders.

 

“BOB! WHY IS GENERAL JREGHUG HERE?! SAYING THAT I SPECIFICALLY REQUESTED HIS PRESENCE?!”

 

Bob tilted his head.

 

“Because you did?”

 

“When?! How?! Why?!”

 

“You stamped the request I gave you, didn’t you?”

 

“WHY WOULD YOU HAVE HIM COME HERE?! I have no idea what to say to him! He’ll have me tortured for this!”

 

“You don’t have to say anything to him, just stand by near the throne room and wait for me.”

 

“Wait for you? Wait for you?! You caused this situation in the first place! I…”

 

Londibni was interrupted when an explosion rocked the castle. Bob simply nodded.

 

“Right on schedule.”

 

“Bob…what was that?”

 

“The Hero Princess is assaulting the fort.”

 

“WHAT?!”

 

“Fortunately, General Jreghug happens to be here to deal with her. Still, shouldn’t leave things to chance. Why don’t you head over and start preparing an ambush? Wait for my signal.”

 

Londibni’s eyes watered as she staggered down the hall.

 

“What…how….why…just what is going on?! Why, why is this happening?! Bob, I hate you!”

 

At that moment, Adoel’s dead eyes gained a small amount of life. She made a sympathetic expression as she nodded as hard she could, repeatedly.

 

---

 

And then Bob waited in one of the hallways, wanting to confirm if the Princess’s party was sufficiently strong to take on General Jreghug.

He heard the clang of armor and a rush of boots upon the stone halls, growing louder with each passing moment. Soon he saw shadows flickering in the light of the torches. A group approached the corner…

 

And there they were, the hero’s party. Led by none other than Hero Princess Aurélie Laffitte de Atrein, Holy Sword Faithkeeper in her hand.

 

Bob activated his Analyze skill…

 

And he froze.

 

“Adoel.”

 

The tiny angel hung limply in the air, eyes unfocused. She whispered under her breath.

 

“...don’t say it.”

 

“What’s this ‘Hero’s Retainer’ title the princess has?”

 

“...what do you think?”

 

“Did she follow one of the previous heroes or something?”

 

“...no.”

 

“Is there another hero or something? Maybe it’s some sort of official role in the Kingdom?”

 

“...no.”

 

“So…it’s referring to me?”

 

Adoel covered her face with both her hands.

 

“...yes.”

 

Bob tilted his head.

 

“How on Earth did that happen?”

 

Adoel just whispered under her breath.

 

“...I don’t want to talk about it.”

 

“Hm? What was that?”

 

“...nothing.”

 

Bob rubbed his chin. Eventually, he shrugged.

 

“Well, in any case that’s certainly convenient.”

 

“...of course it is. Of course it’s going to help you. Of course.”

 

Adoel landed on the floor and curled up into a ball. Meanwhile Bob sent a small sliver of mana forward. So small only the most sensitive and focused of mages might notice it.

 

Unless it contacted someone with a connection to Bob.

 

Hero Princess Aurélie suddenly stopped, her eyes widening. Her companions stopped as well, turning to her. Ser Émeline spoke first.

 

“My Lady, what seems to be the matter?”

 

“Go on ahead, I’ll catch up. There’s something I must do.”

 

Ser Émeline was about to object when she caught the look in Hero Princess Aurélie’s eyes. She nodded and lead the group onward.

Hero Princess Aurélie turned to the small corridor to the side. Bob had not yet dropped his Presence Concealment but Hero Princess Aurélie was bound to him by an oath of honor. She would always know when and where her liege called for her.

She rushed into the corridor and took a knee, bowing her head.

 

“My hero, your servant is most honored to meet you.”

 

Bob stood in front of her, arms crossed, and dropped his Concealment. He nodded his head.

 

“You’ve done well, Hero Princess Aurélie.”

 

You have accepted a Retainer’s Oath from Aurélie Laffitte de Atrein!

 

You have chosen to bestow the power and glory that is rightfully yours to another! You have earned the title: Selfless Hero!

 

Name	Effect
Selfless Hero	User may grant the effect of hero skills and holy blessings to retainers and allies. In exchange, may gain a portion of experience and learn new skills based on your Retainer’s achievements.

 

“Your servant is not worthy of your praise, milord. I know it is only due to your ceaseless efforts that I have come this far.”

 

“Don’t diminish your own achievements. It was by your will and strength you grasped these opportunities, no matter who provided them to you.”

 

Her face flushed as her chest filled with warmth and pride.

 

“You honor me too much, milord. Please tell me, how may I serve you?”

 

“You know who awaits you here?”

 

“We heard General Jreghug is inspecting this supply base. It seemed a good opportunity to test ourselves against the Eight Generals as well as disrupt the flow of supplies to the front.”

 

“You’re correct, General Jreghug is waiting in the throne room. Now, about your assault…”

 

---

 

General Jreghug sat upon his throne. The gray orc was a veritable wall of muscle and hatred, the scavenged leather and armor he wore doing little to hide his thick arms or solid chest. He tore through a roasted bird leg with glee, a huge cleaver resting against the side of this throne.

 

Suddenly the doors slammed open. Hero Princess Aurélie stormed into the room, cutting down the guards in front of her. She was followed by ever faithful Ser Emeline, the knight following up with sword and shield to keep the Hero Princess from being cut off and surrounded.

Behind them was an elf warrior in elegant silver armor, with an elegant and deadly glaive in hand. He held the line for the backliners, wielding blade and magic in equal measure. His body glowed with light as his twin sister stood behind him, chanting with a glowing staff in hand.

A crossbow bolt as thick as a man’s arm shot past the pair, piercing several orcs together. A dwarf marksman held a crossbow, a fearsome device that would take five men working together to load. He pulled it back with a single hand and loaded another shot.

Behind them all, a halfling cleric quietly stepped into the corner, chanting her healing spells from corners unseen, her faith protecting her from all harm. That and a history with the Thieves’ Guild before she repented and joined the clergy. A most tricky opponent to face, for one moment victory against her comrades seems sure, and the next she’s stolen away the precious kill with her stealthy healing spells.

 

Hero Princess Aurélie strode forward, pointing her blade at the orc.

 

“General Jreghug, the Dread Orc General of the Dark Lord’s Horde, prepare yourself! I, Princess Aurélie Laffitte de Atrein, shall bring you to justice this day!”

 

General Jreghug swallowed his food, then rose to his feet. He chuckled darkly as he grabbed his cleaver.

 

“The battlefield ain’t no place for a little girl playin’ hero. You’re gonna regret coming here!”

 

With that, General Jreghug leapt high into the air, the floor cracking under the weight of his jump. He held his cleaver high as dropped down. He swung his blade down directly on top of the Hero Princess.

 

CLANG!

 

A gust of wind blew through the room.

Princess Aurélie held her sword in a high guard.

General Jreghug’s cleaver rested against it.

He had been stopped completely.

Princess Aurélie was entirely unharmed.

And unmoved, despite the powerful blow leveraged against her.

General Jreghug just stared eyes wide, blinking several times.

Then, he did what all good, powerful orcs do.

 

And started running for dear life.

 

The General always boasted about how orcs were the epitome of a warrior race, born with savage strength and with a natural love for fighting. But this was not entirely true. Orcs do not love fighting. Orcs love inflicting violence upon other beings.

Which means orcs love fighting…people weaker than them.

 

They do not love fighting legitimate threats.

 

Of course this was outside of the expectations of the hero party, so they simply stared in shock as the Dread Orc, one of the Dark Lord’s Eight Generals, ran for the emergency escape.

And promptly stepped on a bottle rolling across the room…

The bottle exploded into some sort of sticky liquid, trapping the Dread Orc in place.

He pulled with all his strength but he could not free himself from the trap.

He started to sweat.

And looked back.

Princess Aurélie was approaching, blade at the ready.

 

“Y-You can’t win! E-Even if you kill me, I am but the weakest of the Eight Generals! S-So you better surrender now! I-I’ll put in a good word for ya, and we’ll make sure ya get a painless death! How about it?”

 

Princess Aurélie just tilted her head.

 

“Yes? We already know you're the weakest, that’s why we came for you?”

 

The Dread Orc frowned. His heart was full of regret as the golden blade approached his neck…

 

---

 

Your Retainer Aurélie Laffitte de Atrein has slain: Jreghug (Level 107 Orc) You have gained 96 XP! Level Up!

You are now level 60! +1 HP +1 MP +1 Strength +1 Magic +1 Skill +1 Speed +1 Luck +1 Magic Resistance

 

You have orchestrated the death of one of the Dark Lord’s Eight Generals! You have achieved a feat worthy of a hero…by manipulating someone else into doing it for you? How…heroic. You have earned the title: Hero by a Borrowed Knife!

Name	Effect
Hero by a Borrowed Knife	Conspirators are more likely to go along with your plots and authorities are less likely to question the results. Third parties deal x1.5 damage to one another when manipulated into fighting by your actions.

 

“Huh, neat.”

 

Bob analyzed the new title as he walked into the hidden room to the side of the throne room. Inside he found Londibni, trembling and sweating as she clutched her black bow close to her chest.

 

“B-Bob, what are you doing?! Quick, come and hide before that monster kills us all!”

 

“Don’t worry, I have a plan.”

 

“Plan?! What kind of plan could you possibly have? Didn’t you see that monster slay one of the Eight Generals in a single blow?! What can we possibly do here?”

 

“This.”

 

Bob grabbed Londibni’s arm and hauled her to her feet.

 

He placed an arrow coated in a special liquid in her hand.

 

And then he shoved her out the door.

 

“BOOOOBBBBB?!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!!!”

 

“Better act quick. You should aim for the hero.”

 

Of course, the hero party had already turned to face the open door. Londibni trembled but she wasn’t a lieutenant of an Eight General for nothing. She quickly drew her bow and fired the arrow. The arrow wobbled in flight due to her trembling arms, but her skills compensated and so it landed on target, striking a gap in Princess Aurélie’s armor. The Dwarven Marksman just shook his head and laughed.

 

“Hah, as if something like that could even scratch our blockhead Princess!”

 

Princess Aurélie raised her hand to her forehead and slowly fell backwards.

 

“Oh no! I have been mortally wounded by that foul minion of the Dark Lord!”

 

Her companions just stared at her. Ser Emeline sighed and walked over.

 

“Actually, my lady, it doesn’t look that bad.”

 

“Please…Ser Emeline…take me from this place.”

 

“Looks just like a flesh wound to me.”

 

“It is the deadly poison…I wish…I could see my father…one last time…”

 

“Don’t worry, Princess! Help is on the way! All-Cure!”

 

The Halfling Cleric wasted no time stealing away Princess Aurélie’s ‘pain’.

 

“See, you’re going to be fine.”

 

“B-But…just as I was growing better, I felt the cold grip of death pulling me back. Please Ser Emeline, we must retreat before this powerful foe! Save…the others…”

 

Ser Emeline just heaved a sigh and turned back to the rest of the party.

 

“Well…we got one of the Eight Generals, so I guess we’re fine to leave?”

 

The rest of the party shrugged and nodded. The ever faithful knight just sighed once more.

 

“Very well My Lady, we will depart to ‘address’ your ‘wound’. In fact, I think I should put you through the full training regime, just to make sure everything’s working properly.”

 

Princess Aurélie suddenly froze, her eyes shooting open.

 

“U-Um, actually, I think I’m feeling much better…”

 

“No no, My Lady, we must not take any chances with your safety. Your father would have me executed should anything happen to you.”

 

“N-No, I should be all right I think. I just need a night of rest.”

 

“And what better way to rest than after a good workout session? Don’t worry, I’ll make sure to take good care of you tonight, My Lady.”

 

And so the hero’s party retreated, Ser Emeline dragging a crying Hero Princess Aurélie along the ground by the back of her collar. Londibni was frozen in place, trembling as she watched events unfold her mind couldn’t comprehend.

Bob simply held his head and sighed. Of course the Hero Princess wasn’t in any danger, the ‘poison’ was just a healing potion infused with Bob’s mana as a signal for Princess Aurélie. But well…this was not exactly what he expected.

 

“Adoel.”

 

“...what?”

 

“Princess Aurélie is a princess, right?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“So she should be some sort of public figure expected to conduct diplomacy and public relations, correct?”

 

“...that should be the case.”

 

“So it’s reasonable to expect she’s had training in acting and public speaking, right?”

 

“That would seem reasonable.”

 

“So…”

 

“...she did run off a lot to go adventure in dungeons. Maybe she missed a few courses?”

 

Bob just heaved a sigh.

 

---

 

As Bob went to sleep that night, Adoel curled up into a ball on the floor. It was about time to submit her latest report. And that meant remembering all the terrible things this evil hero forced her to do on behalf of the Dark Lord. Tears filled her eyes.

But she was an angel, commanded to assist the hero on his perilous quest. She had to face this evil, report his fell deeds.

And so she reflected on all that had occured.

 

That cruel, evil hero…

 

Had manipulated the Hero Princess into fighting one the Eight Generals.

 

Checking her level first to make sure she was strong enough to handle it.

 

Then betrayed the Eight General he was working for to make sure he couldn’t escape.

 

Guaranteeing the Hero Princess could bring him to justice.

 

Then arranged for her to be apparently wounded by an attack that couldn’t possibly harm her.

 

Causing the hero’s party to retreat before reinforcements from the Dark Lord’s Army arrived, such that their trail was too cold to follow by the time the trackers arrived…

 

Adoel froze and her eyes shot open.

 

Wait a minute…

 

Wasn’t all this actually good?!

 

Like, actual hero work?!

 

Adoel trembled and bit her lips.

 

No.

 

She refused!

 

He was definitely planning something evil with this!

 

She knew he was!

 

She refused to believe he had intentionally done something good!

 

He wouldn’t trick her!

 

He was evil!

 

Definitely evil!

 

She would prove it! If it was the last thing she did!

 

That no good, evil hero!

 

---

 

Londibni knelt in a dark room, lit by dim torches. A black throne made of jagged metal and rock stood before her.

 

She dare not look upon the figure sitting upon it.

 

A voice came down on her from above, a fell tide that caused her chest to constrict and her heart to pound. She felt her veins run cold as an icy gaze gripped her heart.

 

“Most impressive. Londibni Grenuc, for driving off the Hero after she slew General Jreghug, you shall take his place. Rise, the newest of my Eight Generals.”

 

Londibni rose to her feet, a smile upon her face.

 

“I am most honored, my lord. Please, command your servant.”

 

“I expect great things from you, my General. Go now, and await my command.”

 

Londibni gave one last elegant bow, and then began walking from the room. Her stride was unerring, her back perfectly straight, her face displaying an expression of pride and satisfaction.

 

Inwardly, though?

 

Inwardly a single word filled her mind and her heart.

 

“WHYYYYYYYYYY?!!!”

 

Bob's Current Status: