"Call me ASAP."

 

The only new text from Matthew. I knew calling him back was urgent, but at the same time, would I want to know what was happening? Could I go with the stress of knowing something big is happening? What If I'm overthinking it?

 

I sat my phone on my lap and turned to Jeremy, driving the car down the winding backroads towards home.

 

"Do you know of anything happening back at the house?" I asked him. He shook his head and continued to look forward. I replied to Matthew, trying to act casual and get a feel for the situation.

 

"Hey. What's up?"

 

With only a moment's delay, I received a call from Matthew. Hesitating, I answered and held the phone up to my ear. "Hello?" I said into the phone.

 

"Lyall? Where are you and Jeremy at?" Matthew asked, sounding a little frantic.

 

"We are on our way back from Pines. We had a holdup and stayed overnight at-" But I was cut off.

 

"What's your ETA?" Matthew said.

 

"Probably half an hour? What's going on?" I asked.

 

 I could hear Matthew whispering in the background. Matthew's voice was muffled, but I could hear Nash talking in the background. I heard the phone shuffle, and Matthew spoke.

 

"Some stuff is going on. We need you guys back here as soon as you can." He said.

 

"Is it Barclay?" I asked.

 

"No," Matthew said. "It's Benji. He's been missing since last night."

 

"What do you mean missing?" I asked, "Like ran off missing?"

 

"I wish I knew Lyall," Matthew said. "Meet us at the house."

 

The call ended, and Jeremy looked over at me. I was unsure if he had heard the conversation or could read my face, but he knew something was up. We continued to drive until we made it back into town. Pulling up to the house, I could see quite a few cars parked on the street. We parked the car and walked into the house. Unlike usual, there were a few more people in the house, some of whom were hybrids. 

 

The first person I ran into was Rylie. After seeing me, who looked surprised, shocked, and angry. She walked up to me and immediately stepped in my way.

 

"Where have you been? What happened to a quick errand?" She yelled.

 

"We had something come up, had to stay at a hotel," I said again.

 

"Sure looks like something came up, Mr. feathercheeks" She said as her expression changed to worry. "I'm glad you guys are alright." She wrapped her arms around me in a hug, and my face pressed into her neck feathers as she squeezed. 

 

"Have you heard anything from Benji?" She said, pulling away from me.

 

"I haven't. What's going on?" I asked.

 

Matthew interrupted from the side. "Benji got upset over something's last night while you two were out," Matthew said, sighing. "He walked out, and no one has seen him since."

 

"Do you think...." I started to ask before stopping.

 

"We don't know," Matthew said. "Nash and a few others are out looking for him. Some friends volunteered to ask around if anyone had seen him. But nothing so far."

 

"Does he have any family around?" I asked

 

"No, after his Mom passed, he had no one." Matthew said, "Technically, Damien was his guardian."

 

"So he's gotta be somewhere around here, right?" 

 

"That's the hope," Matthew said.

 

"I guess Jeremy and I will drive around and look," I said. 

 

But then I heard a voice shout from across the room. "They found his shirt at Newberry park!" The voice was coming from a man with white feathers on his chest. He looked oddly familiar, but I could not place him.

 

"Jeremy! Can I borrow your car?" Matthew shouted. Jeremy nodded and tossed his keys towards Matthew. The keys fell just short, and I bent over to grab them. 

 

"I'll drive," I said, turning to the door. 

 

We, along with several others, walked out and climbed into cars. Matthew got into Jeremy's with me, and Rylie got into the other bird hybrid's car. We started driving towards Newberry park, about 2 miles down the road. When we arrived, we could see Nash and another man talking.

 

"Where was he?" Matthew shouted as he exited the car.

 

"Near the edge of the woods," Nash said, holding a shirt. "Sides are cut out, so I assume it's his"

 

Matthew took the shirt and looked at it. "Yeah, he was wearing it last night. Find anything else?" 

 

"Just the shirt and a few feathers. Not sure if they are his or a crow's," Nash said. "But just a shirt could be a good sign."

 

"Let's search around," Matthew said. "Ask some of the folks around if they had seen him."

 

Matthew and Nash split off and began walking door to door, asking if anyone had seen a feathered kid around. Jeremy followed Rylie down the street to talk to the few people in the park's pavilion. I walked along the park's perimeter edge of the woods and eventually reached a small dirt path between two bushes. I followed the small path about 3 feet in the path and was met with a chain-link fence. The trail continued following the fence with a line of thick overgrowth covering the view from the park.

 

Reaching the end of the fence after about fifty feet, the path turned around the fence and downhill to a creek. Trying to keep my footing, I walked down the trail. About halfway down the decline, I felt my foot slip and landed hard on my side. I was sliding down towards the bottom when I reached the small rocks at the bottom. 

 

Standing, I could see wet rocks around the creek's edge. With the creek's low water and slow speed, something had to have disturbed the water and soaked the stones. I walked further down the stream and came across a large hill. The side of the hill was made up of concrete slabs that had been broken up into large chunks and thrown down the hill. The number of empty cans around meant this must be a popular place for drinking and hanging out. The concrete sections hung off the side of the hill with small pieces of rebar hanging out of some slabs.

 

Walking across the concrete slabs was not easier after the fall I had earlier. I kept walking forward, following the path of the water, walking against the flow. I'm unsure how far it could go back, but I would need to turn around at some point. Reaching the end of the concrete slabs, I decided to turn around and head back, having found nothing. Turning around, I started the trek across the slabs once again, but when I made it about 20 feet, I could see what looked like a person in a black hoodie lying against one of the slabs. I could not see a face, only the black hood, and shirt on their back.

 

Out of curiosity, if that was a person or just an abandoned garbage bag, I yelled, "Hey!" The figure did not move much, but I could see it move. The coat on them almost looked shiny? Walking closer, I began to get a clearer image of what I was looking at. The hood was black, but along the front side, it was pulled tight and had white peeking out from the chest.

 

"Have you seen a young man with black feathers around here?" I asked the figure, "We are desperately trying to find him."

 

Getting closer, still about 15 feet away, I saw the coat expand, and once it did, I realized that it was not a coat or hoodie. The 'hood' was comprised of black feathers smoothly transitioning down his back, meeting the white feathers of his tail. 

 

"Benji? Is that you?" I said quietly.

 

The body pushed up from the ground, its head turning to face me. It was Benji's face, but from the chin down was white feathers down to his chest, black feathers reaching his waist. Around his face were the same black feathers wrapping around his head and neck. All of his human hair was replaced with jet black feathers. Around his black eyes were orange and blue flesh forming a circle around each eye. His arms were still as they were, long flight-ready feathers meeting with hands at the ends of his arms. Giving him his awkward arm/wing hybrids.

 

Benji stared at me with a look like a scared child. His voice cracked on the verge of tears as he spoke. "It got so cold... I couldn't." Benji said, "They just started coming... they wouldn't stop growing." His hands reached for his face.

 

"It's all going to be alright. Let me call-" I said before being interrupted.

 

"No," Benji shouted. "I mean, not yet. They can't see me like this," He said, looking down as he attempted to hide his face with his right arm's feathers.

 

I stopped, reaching for my shirt's pocket to grab my phone. I sat down on the concrete and tried to make myself comfortable. I laid down, my side resting against the flat concrete chunk, looking down slightly at Benji. His eyes were shut, and his body was shaking. The blue eyelid would occasionally open to look at me before closing again.

 

"Well, I can wait then," I said to Benji, reaching my hand to him. "But you have to tell me what happened to ya."

 

Benji looked at me irritated before looking at the ground. He stayed quiet and seemed to be on the verge of talking but could not start. The shaking seemed to subside.

 

"It's between us. I won't tell anyone. I promise," I said to him in a whisper.

 

"I'm... "Benji started before hesitating. "I can't stand being treated like a child." Benji lifted his head and pulled his arms to his sides. "I get that I am young, but I feel like everyone tries to make every decision for me. I won't get to be an adult, so why bother?"

 

"I think I know what you mean," I said back "with everything happening these past few weeks, everyone has been a little stressed." 

 

Knowing everything Benji has been through makes it hard even to begin to come up with encouragement. He lost his Mom, followed by his father figure in a short time. Leaving him a kid with no family, not to even begin with his changes on top of it. 

 

"Is it worth the effort?" Benji said

 

"Is what worth the effort?" I asked

 

"Look at me. I'm more bird than human now, and I wake up to check if I'm closer, then go to sleep to hope I don't change more." Benji said, "I don't even know where I'll end up! I can't stay here unless I want to become a thing to gawk at in a zoo."

 

"Benji, we will figure something out before then," I said.

 

"When? I could go at any second if I wanted to. I can already feel what's next." he said, rubbing his face with his feathered arms. "Before long, I'll be taken away in a box. Never to be seen again."

 

Do I tell him? Would telling him we found Damien make it better, or would it just upset him more? Even though it wasn't the Damien we knew, we at least know what became of him. But seeing what being around that place did to Jeremy, I don't know if I want to risk it.

 

"Why did you come here?" I asked, trying to change the subject. 

 

"To the creek?" Benji asked. "I was headed for the park to cool off. But when the changes started."

 

"And you were cold?" 

 

"It was freezing last night! I started feeling numb, then out of nowhere, I felt super hot and pulled my shirt off. When I realized what was happening, the feathers were already spreading." Benji said, running his hand against his neck. "I guess it was warmer after that. I found this little space and climbed in. It was warm and quiet. Next thing I knew, it was daytime" He began to pull himself entirely out of the tiny space.

 

As he climbed out, I could get a better view of him. Covering his body were black and white feathers. His torso still had a human build to it, but it looked almost like he was wearing a wetsuit. He stood up, and I could see his hair was missing and his head covered in a smooth rounded layer of feathers. Had he grown the toucan's large beak, you would not be able to distinguish his head from a bird's. 

 

As he stood in front of me, he pulled his wing-arms up and close to his sides. Seeing him do this reminded me of the later days we had with Damien before he lost his hands. He stood with a look of embarrassment as he tried to keep from making eye contact.

 

"You weren't the only one last night," I said, chuckling. I held my hand up and rubbed my cheeks. "If only you knew the story," I said quietly.

 

Benji looked at my face. "When did you change?"

 

I told Benji about running into the hawk and Jeremy's kingfisher, and I left out the parts with Damien. Benji laughed. Even though it was embarrassing to tell him about the housekeeping, it was great to see his mind off his changes, even if it was only for now. I led that into the call from Matthew and how so many people were looking for him. 

 

"Maybe, we should find the others. I think they would be happy to see you again." I said, "I think you have Nash looking for a parrot!" To which Benji chuckled a bit.

 

"You think they will be mad?" Benji asked.

 

We both stretched a bit before climbing down to the creek's edge. We walked the same way out that I walked in. The steep incline gave us some difficulty as my shoes were slick, and Benji seemed to have little help due to the tiny claws digging into the mud. We reached the dirt trail that let out into the park. I'll admit I was nervous to know how everyone would react to his changes. 

 

As I stepped out into the park, I could see Matthew talking on the phone. Once he caught a glimpse of me, he started walking toward me quickly, and he brought the phone down away from his head.

 

"They may have found some feathers near the bridge, and Nash does not know if they are Benji's or just a crow's." As he finished, Benji stepped out beside me. "Benji? Jesus Christ, kid! We thought you were gone." Matthew shouted as he ran up and wrapped his arms around the toucan.

 

I pulled my phone out of my pocket and sent a text to Nash, Rylie, and Jeremy, letting them know Benji was safe. It wasn't long before Nash's vehicle pulled up, and they pored out the doors. 

 

Rylie walked up and gave a long look at Benji. "The feathers look good on you. Orange 'round the eyes? Looks rad," She said with a wink. 

 

"I'm glad I still have lips. I know you make it work, but I don't know. Have you seen what a toucan looks like?" Benji said, laughing. 

 

Nash called the rest of the search party off. After talking about the changes, everyone seemed to relax a bit. We started piling into the car to head back to the house. As we drove, Nash joked about Benji's new 'winter coat,' claiming it was naturally sourced and 'just in season.'

 

Once we arrived at the house, almost everyone had already left. Still waiting at the house was the fellow with the white feathers on his chest. Nash stopped to talk with him as everyone else walked into the house. In passing, I could hear Nash thanking the man. Not wanting to seem creepy, I kept on walking in.

 

Matthew told Benji to clean himself up, and Benji immediately walked upstairs. Shortly after, we could hear the shower start. We all sat down on the couches, and even in the late afternoon, I could tell everyone was exhausted already. 

 

"How'd you find him?" Matthew asked.

 

"I don't know, and I guess I just happened to see him in the woods," I answered.

 

"I can't believe he is as far as he is," Matthew said. "I mean, I'm the furthest still, but he changed that much in one night?"

 

"Do you think the cold did it to him?" Nash asked. "Or do you think he..."

 

"He's too smart to let himself change here, especially with winter coming," Rylie said. "The snow would kill him."

 

"If he were just a few years older, this wouldn't be a problem," Nash said.

 

"Older? What would that have helped?" I asked. He may be young, but I can tell that Benji is mature enough to handle himself at this point.

 

"You didn't hear about last night?" Nash said. "Benji isn't allowed to stay here. He's a minor without a guardian, and Damien was his legal guardian before. Now that he's gone, they want to place Benji with either family or in a home."

 

"So he's upset because he's being taken?" I asked, "None of us can become his legal guardian?"

 

"Not while he was mostly human. They argued that he needed to be in a regular home since he wasn't very far along. Now that he is further, it could help us or hurt us." Nash said with a sigh. 

 

"I'm going to argue that it will help us." Matthew said, "No regular strangers will know what is best for him than this group of strangers."

 

We sat quietly around the table. I looked up to see Rylie's emotionless face staring at me. I broke eye contact and looked down; I could tell she was still looking at me.

 

"So, what happened to your face?" Rylie asked. 

 

I reached up and felt the feathers on my cheeks. "Just a small change. Nothing too bad." I said. I tried to play it off as nothing, but I knew she would be upset if she knew I went looking for Damien.

 

"What were you doing in Pines again?" She asked slyly.

 

I went to answer, but I couldn't for the life of me remember what I had told them before leaving. I tried to think back on what I had said, but the longer I took, the more suspicious it would be.

 

"We visited a relative," I said confidently.

 

"And you only had to go because your mom's car broke down?" She asked. Both she and I knew she had caught me in a lie. "You might as well just tell me what you were doing." She said, sitting back in the chair.

 

I took a deep breath before starting, "I took Jeremy to Pines to try and find Damien. I mean, we did see him, but yeah." I said, defeated.

 

"Pines?" Nash asked, sitting up more interested. "As in the bird sanctuary in Pines?"

 

"Yeah? They have him there with another woodpecker," I said.

 

"It's funny that he and Darren are together again," Nash chuckled.

 

"Darren like the-"

 

"The Osprey! He used to hang out here with us." Nash exclaimed. "He was an odd fellow, but he and Damien were close."

 

"Darren is the reason we have the house. He initially owned it." Matthew said. 

 

"And you all knew him?" I asked.

 

"Well, by the time I met him, he was pretty far along," Matthew said. "He was only around a couple of months when I was here."

 

While we were talking, Jeremy walked down the stairs and into the room. He wore a set of loose boxers in place of pants, and his legs were still covered in blue feathers. He walked past me and took a seat on the couch.

 

"A little late to the party, are we?" Rylie said to Jeremy. He nodded his head slowly. "So Lyall won't say what happened to his face. What's the story with your legs?" Rylie said jokingly.

 

Jeremy looked over at me and nodded his head. He looked at Rylie again and shrugged. He kept a relaxed demeanor while doing so.

 

 "I know it had something to do with the sanctuary you guys went to, so either I can guess, or you two can spill it.' Rylie said.

 

Jeremy's eyes went huge. He looked at me and nudged his head toward Rylie, asking if I had told her. I gave a loose shrug which caused Jeremy to shake his head. 

 

Nash laughed. "You two can't keep a secret to save your life, can you?"

 

Rylie stood up. "Well, if you ain't going to talk, I guess I have other things to get done. Nash, let's go talk to him." Nash stood up and followed Rylie up the stairs. Once the door shut, Matthew leaned in toward me.

 

"So, how was Damien?' Matthew asked.

 

"I guess he is fine," I replied. "Not sure what we expected to be honest." 

 

Looking back on the trip, we didn't accomplish anything we set out to find. Or I should say, I set out to find. Jeremy happened to come along, and all I managed to do was further his changes. He didn't seem upset over it, but I can't help but feel bad for him.

 

"Well, I can probably guess how it went," Matthew said. "I spent so much time doing the same thing you are doing." He leaned back into the seat.

 

Confused, I asked, "what do you mean?"

 

"I looked for answers. I had myself convinced I could figure out how it works. I chased down every idea of how the changes ended." He said.

 

"Did you find anything?" I quickly asked.

 

"See! You don't even realize you're doing it." Matthew laughed. "All I did was stress myself. Your changes are happening pretty quick, wouldn't you say?"

 

I looked at myself. Sure, I had some significant visual changes, but it was slowing down. "I've had a few, but the first ones are the biggest right?" I said, unsure.

 

"Mate, for first changes are usually in week one. You've been at this for over a month," He said quietly. "I think you're stressing yourself too much. I only say it because I did the same thing and spent so much time looking for answers. Hell, I spent two weeks trying to communicate with a raven hybrid, ex-hybrid."

 

While I didn't want to believe him, the more he spoke, I realized maybe I was doing more harm than good. I chased down a bird to ask it questions, and it sounds crazy now that I look back at it. Damien seemed no different from any other woodpecker, and Darren was... different. Maybe that's how ospreys are? 

 

"It took the beak before I realized what I was doing." Matthew continued, "Now I've been months without changes. Maybe I would know if I tried harder or worked a little longer. But is it worth knowing if I lose myself to find out?"

 

"The ravens, they changed you?" I asked quietly, glancing at Jeremy. I could see him staring at me as I asked.

 

"You are persistent. You know that?" Matthew said. He took a deep breath before continuing. "I think our minds are split, sharing space with the animal's mind. I felt a different part of me when I was around the ravens. I didn't want to stop the changes and wouldn't realize until I snapped out of it."

 

Thinking back to Jeremy and I's interactions with the hawk and kingfisher. I didn't want to leave the hawk and wanted to stay with it. I imagine Jeremy was not far off. He chattered with her and was engrossed in it. We both fell victim to ourselves without realizing it. 

 

"I think... I felt that yesterday," I said, looking at Jeremy. "Did you feel it?"

 

Jeremy's eyes darted between Matthew and me. He closed his eyes and gave a very slight nod. His eyes slowly opened but started forward, not looking at Matthew or myself. 

 

"How's the saying go?" Matthew said. "Don't fly too close to the sun? I'll be the first to tell ya. You'll get burned."

 

Maybe I was pushing it. Perhaps I've been pushing others too? Why do others seem To change faster around me? Kole was doing fine with almost nothing new before I started changing, and Damien had his episodes after I had shown up. Jeremy though, I don't think I can entirely blame myself there. 

 

"Lyall!" I heard Rylie yell from up the stairs. "Can you come up here for a sec?"

 

I looked at Matthew, wondering if he had any idea. He shrugged and walked to the kitchen, and I stood up and walked toward the stairs. Walking up, I could hear Rylie saying something, but it was muffled. I walked into Benji's room, and on the bed sat Rylie and Benji. 

 

Although I had already seen him quite a bit in his current form, seeing Benji with his new changes is hard. If you had seen a photo of him before today, you would not recognize him now. His hand was rubbing at his lips when he turned to look my way. His eyes were black with blue circles surrounding them. When he looked at you, the many colors were almost distracting. 

 

As I sat down, Rylie got up and started to walk out of the room. I watched as she slowly walked towards the door, closing it quietly behind herself. All I could think of was the last time I was in a situation like this. Alone, in a room with someone deep into changing. Looking back at Benji, he was still staring at me. 

 

"Sorry about today. I know whatever you were doing yesterday was stressful, and coming home to this probably didn't help." Benji said. 

 

To further add to the distraction, every time he would 'blink' instead of his eyes closing and opening like mine or any humans. His eyes would be covered by a clear-ish eyelid that, for a split second, covered his eye with a gray membrane. I tried to keep on track, but I felt worse for him with every detail I found.

 

"You weren't any trouble for Jeremy or me," I said, putting my hand on his shoulder. "We are just glad you're ok," I said, not knowing what would be the right thing to say. I had never been good at situations like these.

 

"I know, everyone keeps saying that. But I caused a big ruckus, and it all could have been avoided." He continued, "You know what I mean, right?"

 

"I know, but it's not a big deal. I'm here for you whenever you need me," I said confidently.

 

"So you won't mind being there when my final change happens?"