The next morning, at the <Home>--

The door to Fainn's room opened slightly while Fainn and Elma slept.

"Psst. Elma. Psst," came from the door.

Elma did not stir.

"Elma. Psst. Elma."

Still, Elma did not stir.

The door opened further, and in slipped Svilran as she dragged herself across the floor like a covert operative behind enemy lines. Of course, she was dressed for the occasion, wearing an all-black outfit consisting of a tactical turtleneck sweater, a tactical beanie, black cargo pants, and black combat boots. She reached the bed and poked her head up over the side. She was thankful that Elma was sleeping on the exposed side and not Fainn. That said, her back was to Svilran.

Aww, Svilran thought. I hate to seem like I'm ruining this moment but...

Svilran tapped on Elma's shoulder.

My Heroes need me!

"Psst. Elma. Psst. I need you to wake up."

Elma mumbled something as she swatted Svilran's hand away.

"Elma. Please," Svilran whispered. "The fate of the Hero Hub depends on us."

"Whuzza--danger?" Elma said as she turned in the bed. She landed on her side, facing Svilran. Her eyes opened slightly. "Hey, Madam Goddess..." Elma's eyes sprang open, her heart racing. "Madam Godd--"

Svilran shoved her hand against Elma's mouth. "Shhh!" Svilran said as she poked her head over Elma's body.

Fainn was still. Elma's outburst hadn't woken him up, much to Svilran's relief. She lowered herself back to Elma's level and uncovered Elma's mouth.

"Madam Goddess, I'm sorry. Are you upset? I won't do it again--"

"No, no, it's okay. I am not some hard-working, devoted woman walking in on her partner in bed with some harlot after a long night at the Infirmary."

Elma's eyes were as wide as she was tense. "Uhh..."

"I'm saying it's not like that!" Svilran said, a wide smile on her face. "I am simply a hard-working, devoted woman who walked in on her partner in bed with the other woman she expected to be there. It's okay." Svilran nodded smugly. "I was actually giving you two time to yourselves, you know. Consider it my 'thank you' for your hard work, Elma."

"Oh... okay... whew." Elma wore a smile. "So, what do you need, Madam Goddess?"

Svilran clasped her hands and furrowed her brow. "Dorthaunzee needs us!"

"Zee?! Did something happen?!" Elma whispered, overcome with worry.

"I'm not sure yet! Kanae said it was a matter of grave importance. Dorthaunzee's happiness is on the line!"

"Oh my gosh!" Elma sat up with incredible vigor, so much so that the sheets fell off her chest.

"Hmm." Svilran stared at Elma's bare, exposed chest and then into Elma's eyes. "So you sleep in the nude?"

Elma, nonchalantly, glanced down at her upper body and then at Svilran. "I have shorts on. Fainn just likes pressing his face into my chest, so I make it easy."

"Oooh," Svilran said, nodding repeatedly. "Right, of course," she giggled. "Yes, he does like doing that." Svilran looked at Elma's chest again and then at her own. Then, she made eye contact with Elma, a smug smile on her face. "There is certainly a place for both of us here."

"Goddess... Are you angry at me?"

"What?! No, not at all. Come, you must get dressed posthaste! Dorthaunzee awaits!"

"Right!"

Elma kissed Fainn's cheek and climbed out of bed. She found her shirt and slipped it on before following Svilran out of the room.

"By the way, Madam Goddess, your outfit is very cute."

"Oh my gosh, Elma, isn't it just? I never thought I'd have the opportunity to wear it."

The two closed the door, leaving Fainn by himself.

But then the door opened, and Svilran tiptoed in quickly and quietly. She climbed on the bed and kissed Fainn on the cheek. "Sweet dreams, Fainn. You can count on me! I'll protect Dorthaunzee's happiness!"

Then, with the happiest smile on her face, Svilran left the room.

 

At the <Infirmary>--

"Thank you for being here," Kanae said.

Svilran and Elma were sitting at her bedside, both anxious. (Svilran had switched back to her default obvious because, 'obviously,' she wasn't stealthing around anymore.)

"Where's Zee?" Elma asked.

"She will not be joining us at this stage," Kanae calmly replied.

"But she's in trouble?"

"Yes, she's in distress. Great distress."

"But she's in her room," Svilran said, having checked through her Hub awareness.

"Yes, but her heart's in distress."

"Okay," Elma said, noting they weren't getting anywhere. "Please explain, Kanae."

"Right. See, as it turned out..."

Svilran and Elma both leaned in.

"Dorthaunzee is madly in love with Fainn."

"WHAT?!?!" Svilran yelped.

"Oh... that makes sense."

Svilran, utterly shocked, looked at Elma for answers. "Does it really make sense?! Why aren't you more surprised?!"

"Well, Fainn does so much for her that, yeah, it makes sense that she would have feelings for him. And I mean... I'm hooked up to Zee a lot. I know how often she thinks about him. It's like once every 20 seconds when we're out on Missions. It'd be weird if she wasn't fond of him."

"Oh," Svilran said, scrunching her face. "I guess I'm just surprised because I thought she was too devoted to her higher power..." Svilran furrowed her brows. "So that's why she hugs him so tightly... Hmm... How scandalous. Sneaking hugs like that..."

"I'm glad you two could see the truth once it was pointed out. On the note of 'truth,' last night's reveal truly shook Dorthaunzee," Kanae said.

Elma nodded. "So that's why she refused to spread spores."

"Yes. She was experiencing severe shock and didn't want to let us know."

"Aww... Poor Dorthaunzee," Svilran followed, almost on the verge of tears. "Well, I'm okay with it! If Dorthaunzee likes Fainn, she should be free to have her feelings answered."

"I agree. It would be silly to draw a line now," Elma followed.

"This is why I have concocted a plan," Kanae said, her facial muscles having regained enough function to make a devious smirk--one made creepier by her charred complexion.

Elma was completely unfazed by the extraordinarily terrifying sight of a burnt-to-a-crisp person smirking deviously. She continued without a problem and asked--

"We're going to tell Fainn on Dorthaunzee's behalf?"

"No!" Kanae said, her eyes wide. "Words do not a timeless bond make."

Elma raised a brow. "Are you sure, Kanae? I understand that communication is hard with Dorthaunzee, but that's why our stepping in and helping that way would be immensely helpful. We would be doing what Zee can't--"

"Do you want Dorthaunzee to be impregnated thrice and then tossed to the side when Fainn's loins are required elsewhere?"

Elma's jaw dropped, and she shot Svilran a horrified look. "Well, I wouldn't want that." She looked at Kanae. "Is that actually a possibility?"

Svilran held her chin and wore an expression of dire concern. "Humans... There were many human males who frequently abandoned their extra women... They even denied the existence of their offspring many times... Fainn is descended from those types of men... And those humans did pick up those habits from some gods... The chance is not nil..."

"Hold your horses--does that mean we're in danger of falling victim to the same thing?!" Elma cried.

Svilran responded with a laugh and puffed her chest out. "Of course not. We aren't the 'extra' women in this equation. I'm the Hub's other half, and you're the first Hero. We're obviously the safe ones..." Svilran cocked her head to the side. "Well... Maybe your position is in question, Elma..."

"I came together with Fainn first," Elma shot back, which provoked a devastated look from Svilran.

"But I am the one that allowed for all this to happen, so I'm essential! Yup, yup, we're both essential. He can't abandon us by saying he's going out for mead and herring then never return!"

Kanae cocked her head and muttered, "Isn't he bound to this very small piece of land regardless?"

"Ahh, I agree with that, Lady Svilran," Elma said. "Yes, we're probably fine, but Dorthaunzee--"

"Yes, we must help her and do all we can to ensure a happy life for her!" Svilran looked at Kanae, more determined than before. "Please guide us, Kanae!"

"And I am happy to do so!" Kanae put on an air of smugness. "I am actually very well-versed in these matters. I have personally borne witness to many courtship rituals. In fact, all the ones that I personally watched over turned out to be very productive and happy. I know everything that must be done to ensure an excellent union."

"Whoa," Elma said. She, a former slave, had no wisdom in the matter. She would certainly not know how to question this woman who professed to know so much.

"Wow! We have our own little cupid," Svilran followed.

Elma cocked her head. "Cupid?"

"Oh, sorry, that was the name of a momma's boy from Earth who got very good at match-making. His personal servants inherited his name and worked as messengers of divinely-ordained love." Svilran shuddered. "They did cause quite a bit of chaos in their first generations, but they settled down once that era of deific rule waned. Anyway, this is good for us!"

Elma giggled. "Wow, Kanae. To be compared to a deity--that's quite noteworthy."

"Surely, Svilran is just too kind. Thank you. I will do my best to live up to the name regardless."

Svilran laughed. "What is the plan, Master of Ceremonies, Kanae? What do we need to do?"

Kanae smirked. "There is no need to fix what is not broken. There are steps that young pairs of Drollfall take in their courtship rituals. We will simply replicate all the steps that are possible on the Hub. We will miss a few, but we should be able to get the majority!"

Svilran pumped her fist. "Whatever it takes for Dorthaunzee's happiness! I refuse to let any of my Heroes suffer if I can help it!"

"I'm ready to help wherever possible as well!" Elma said.

"Great, then here is the plan. We will, as watchful guardians, ensure everything goes off without a hitch..."

And so, a woman who only ever watched children fumble around clumsily, a woman who had no reliable wisdom regarding matters of the heart, and a former goddess of questionable origins and office prepared in secret.