Baxterbro

Video

An average day in the box canyon of Blood Gulch we see two "soldiers" standing on top of Red base. They both are holding pistols.

One with Orange armor, his name is Dexter Grif. 

The second one with Maroon armor, his name his Dick Simmons.

Simmons turns to Grif. "Hey."

"Yeah?" Grif says as he looks to Simmons.

"You ever wonder why we're here?"

"It's one of life's great mysteries, isn't it? Why ARE we here?" 

Black smoke starts to come out of the hole on top of Red Base.

Grif continues "I mean, are we the product of... some cosmic coincidence, or... is there really a God? Watching everything? Y'know, with a plan for us, and stuff? I dunno, man. But it keeps me up at night."

The two stare at each other and an explosion goes off inside the base and someone yells.

Simmons ignoring the explosion. "What?" He asks in confusion. "I meant, why are we out here, in this canyon?"

Grif also ignoring the explosion. "Oh, uh... Yeah."

"What was all that stuff about God?"

"Uh... hmm? Nothing."

A soldier walks by them with Scarlet Red armor that has black scorch marks, his name is Cyprus Ash. he's holding a DMR.

"Hey, Ash." Grif and Simmons say together.

"Hi." Ash says as he walk down the ramp.

Simmons looks back to Grif. "You wanna talk about it?"

"No." Grif quickly says.

"You sure?"

"Yeah."

"Seriously though, why are we out here? As far as I can tell, it's just a box canyon in the middle of nowhere, with no way in or out."

"Mm-hmm."

"The only reason that we set up a Red base here is because they have a Blue base over there. And the only reason they have a Blue base over there is because we have a Red base here."

"Yeah, that's because we're fighting each other."

"No, no, but I mean, even if we were to pull out today, and they were to come take our base, they would have TWO bases in the middle of a box canyon. Whoop-dee-fucking-doo."

"What's up with that, anyway? I mean, I signed on to fight some aliens. Next thing I know, Master Chief blows up the whole Covenant armada, and I'm stuck in the middle of nowhere, fighting a bunch of blue guys."

On the side of a cliff that's overlooking Red base there are two two Blue soldiers. 

One with Cobalt armor and holding a sniper rifle, is Church.

The one standing next to Church, has Aqua armor, is Lavernius Tucker.

Church is watching Grif and Simmons through the sniper scope.

"What are they doing?" Tucker asks Church.

Church turns to Tucker. "What?"

Tucker turns to Church. "I said, what are they doing now?"

Church lowers the sniper rifle. "God damn, I'm getting so sick of answering that question!"

"You have the fucking rifle, I can't see shit! Other than those random explosions! Don't bitch at me because I'm not going to just sit up here and play with my dick."

"Okay, okay, look. They're just standing there and talking, okay? That's all they're doing. That's all they EVER do, is just stand there and talk. That's what they were doing last week. That's what they were doing when you asked me five minutes ago. So five minutes from now, when you ask me "What are they doing?",

An explosion goes off at Red base again.

Church continues. "My answer's gonna be, 'They're still just talking, and they're still just standing there.'"

Tucker looks to Red base then back to Church. "What are they talking about?"

"You know what? I fucking hate you."

Back down to Red base.

"Talk about a waste of resources." Grif tells Simmons. "I mean, we should be out there finding new and intelligent forms of life. Y'know fight them."

"Yeah, no shit. That's why they should put us in charge."

Then a new red soldier comes in, His name is Sarge. Just Sarge. "Ladies! Front and center on the double! You, too, Ash!"

"Fuck." Simmons whispers.

"Yes, sir!" Grif says to Sarge.

The sound of glass breaking is heard inside the base. "Yes, Sir!" Ash yells within the base.

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06-27-2022