Director: Dear Chairman.

Fade in to Caboose's mind

Director: I too hold the protocol in the highest regard. The doctrine kept us all safe during the Great War. If you are insinuating, sir, that we violated it in any way, or that we were derelict in our duty to the military, well then I suggest you be direct, and tell me exactly how we did so.

Cut to Church's ghost standing over Caboose's body, surrounded by everyone else

Washington: What is going on?

Church: Wash, stay calm. We can explain.

Washington: I don't want explanations, I want the truth. Now. When were you gonna tell me about this?

Church: Okay, maybe I should start from the beginning. You see, Caboose here, killed me by accident once. Well actually, more than once.

Caboose: Not my fault. Tucker did it.

Church: Shut up.

Washington: He killed you. As in... dead.

Sarge: Then we reached an agreement. I built Blue over here a new body-

Church: *Laughs.* Agreement? More like we kicked your ass, and you didn't have much of a choice of what you wanted to do!

"Who kickedwhatnow?" Sarge asks.

"I remember that very differently." Ash says.

"What are you, an idiot?" Simmons asks Church.

Sarge starts to grumble.

"You guys totally gave up!" Church yells.

"That's bullshit!" Grif yells.

The Reds start protesting.

"Then there was the time Tex kicked your ass all over..." Church starts. 

"STOP!" Wash yells. "Focus." Wash turns to Sarge. "How did you build him a body??"

"With a Robot Kit of course!" Sarge replies. "I'd already used ours to build our helper... Lopez!"

"And a mighty fine job you did too, Sir!" Simmons kisses Sarge's ass.

"Yeeah, it's always great to have a helper nobody can understand!" Grif says sarcastically.

"It adds diversity." Ash says.

Sarge continues. "Blue team hadn't used theirs for some reason... they even had an extra! We used that for your buddy.... uh, what's her name."

"Alison or Tex." Ash tells Sarge.

"And...that didn't strike anyone as odd??" Wash asks. "That you would have a kit to build a robot that looks like a soldier?"

"That's just standard issue equipment...right?" Simmons asks.

"WHAT? No!! Have you ever run into anyone else that has one?!"

"...We don't really get out that often." 

"I'm not really allowed to leave the base." Ash says.

Sarge speaks up. "Okay smart guy; if they're so rare. Then why did command send us upgraded ones when we were told to ship out to Rat's Nest?"

"You guys went to Rat's Nest too?" Church asks.

"I was sent to an abandoned town." Ash adds in. "It was lonely."

"I used some of the spare parts to spruce up Lopez!" Sarge explains. 

"Spare parts?" Simmons asks. "Did you fix his voice thing?"

"Ya know, I didn't even think about that until just this second! Kinda obvious in hindsight. Probably best not to mention it to him if you see him..."

"Meh. He wouldn't understand anyway."

"Your team sucks." Church says.

At least our team has kills and not team kills." Ash says to Church. "Dipshit."

"Hey!" Caboose starts. "That's not nice!" He turns to Church. "...He means us, right?"

"Yeah." Church answers. "And shut up."

"STOP IT!" Wash yells. "I can't stand this! No. More. Bickering! You have to be the most immature soldiers I've EVER MET! What even happened to you Minne, you've never acted like this before."

"Your face is immature!" Grif insults.

"Shut up!" Wash orders Grif.

"And I've always acted like this?" Ash says.

"From now on everyone just keep quiet and don't talk unless I ask you a question! That's an order! I need to figure this out."

"Hold on!" Sarge speaks. "You can't order us around!"

"Yes, I can."

"What's your rank?"

"My rank?!" Wash says incredulously. "You still don't get it, do you? You think you're real soldiers?! You're not! The only one here is Minnesota. The rest of you are nothing."

"Suck it, Grif." Ash says to Grif.

"Whatever!" Grif says. "Your face is...nothing."

Wash continues. "We use your outpost as testing grounds! PRACTICE. You never noticed that you didn't have anything to do unless a Freelancer showed up? Or you made a call to Command?"

Sarge goes silent. "...You're making that up."

"Am I?"

"Think about it. Name one thing that ever happened to you that wasn't directly proceeded by Command calling you, or sending someone to your base." Wash looks between the Reds and Blues. "One thing." Everyone is silent. "Anything?? No? I thought so." He turns to the Reds. "You three go assess the vehicles. Minne, go with them. See if you can find some trail of the META while you're at it."

"Ooooh! Finally a take charge leader!" Simmons says as he begins to walk off. "I like it!"

"Shut up!" Grif and Sarge say as they follow after Simmons.

"Yeah! The team is back together!" Ash says as he follows his team.

Washington: Church, get back in your armor. You're just going to draw attention to yourself like that.

Church: Fine. But first-

Washington: No, no first. Get in your armor.

Church: I really think I should tell you what it is-

Washington: Sh.

Church: I have a message from Delta.

Washington: Delta? Why didn't you tell me?

Church: Oh come on, seriously?!

Washington: How did you get in contact with him?

Church: He left a message for me in Caboose's head. Actually for me to give to you. I guess he figured out I would get in there and find it.

Washington: How would he know that? Did he know what you are?

Church: Well I didn't tell him. But he seemed pretty smart. Maybe he just put two and two together.

Caboose: Four!

Church: That wasn't a test.

Caboose: Yes it was. I won. A-plus.

Washington: What was the message?

Church: He said "memory is the key."

Washington: Memory is the key. Did he say anything else?

Church: Nothin' important.

Caboose: Memory is the key? What does that mean?

Church: He said Wash would know.

Washington: Memory is the key.

Church: Yeah I know, it didn't make any sense to me either. Just sounded like some kind of stupid riddle or somethin'.

Washington: Gather your gear. We're leaving. Now.

Wash walks off.

Caboose: I think he's angry because of what you said to him.

Church: Yeah. If I knew it was gonna make him leave I would've said it sooner.

Cut to Wash arriving at the Reds and an overturned jeep

"What's the status of the vehicles?" Wash asks Sarge. "Report."

"You could have asked nicely." Grif says.

"You're right. I could. Report!"

"They're all busted." Sarge reports. "We could probably fix one by taking the parts from all the others... that's one of my specialties! Gonna take awhile though."

"How long?" Wash asks.

"Coupla days..." Sarge answers 

"No time. We need to start moving ASAP. And we need seven seats. You're going to get me two Jeeps and a bike in a few hours."

"No can do. Not gonna happen."

"Then we'll have to get them somewhere else. And I know exactly where we can find them."

Church and Caboose walk up to the group.

Church: Why, where are we going?

Washington: Delta was right. Memory is the key.

Church: But what does that mean?

Washington: It means that only one thing remembers everything about these A.I. and where they come from. It will know how to stop them. We need to unlock the Alpha.

Church: The Alpha?

Washington: And that means we're going home. ...We're going to Command.

After end credits, cut to Doc standing in the middle of the facility

Doc: Hey Guys? I'm Here! Anybody?! You guys suck. Stupid windmill.

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07-11-2022