Operator: Situation is critical, sir. Should we do something?

Director: Yes. Send her in.

Operator: Roger that. Come in Number One, Number One you are green.

South's, North's names flash on the leader board.

Director: Activate failsafe.

Operator: Copy sir. Initiating beta protocol.

Cut to the soldiers surrounding North and South.

North Dakota: Well, out of the frying pan and into the fire.

South Dakota: Eh, think I can take about 50 of 'em. How 'bout you?

North: How 'bout you save your jokes until we get out of this?

South: Where the hell is extraction?!

"We're trying!" Minne yells through the comms.

Cut to Demo Man with soldiers standing behind him. They're all aiming at North and South.

Demo Man: Attention assholes! Stand down, you're surrounded!

In the background, a figure in black armor is seen edging their way into position.

Demo Man: Give us the data file now! You will be taken into custody! We can do this the easy way or the hard way! There is no escape, so give us the damn data file!

"Don't you think it's time?" Minne asks over the comms.

The soldier in black leaps down and kicks the soldiers around them off the platform. They then punch the Demo Man away from the turret and uses it to shoot a support beam, causing the platform, and the soldiers standing on it, to collapse.

North: Get down!

North grabs South and shields her with his body as the other platform is broken. The two then get up and look at the female operative attacking the soldiers.

North: Son of a bitch.

South: What's going on?

North: It's her.

South: What? What's she doing here?! Minne, did you know about this?!

It's silent on the comms for a few seconds. "... Maybe."

The female operative uses the turret to shoot a few soldiers who are getting too close, kicks it so it spins while firing off bullets, ducks the turret, and backflips onto the helipad. Her armor changes from black to a light blue color as she spins.

Female operative: Okay, my turn.

She begins engaging the armed soldiers in hand-to-hand combat. Cut to a soldier looking for a gun while the Freelancers run or flip around behind him, kicking, punching and shooting any soldier who gets in their way.

Unknown soldier #1: Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God. Oh, yes! A rifle!

Unknown soldier #2: Uh, hey man.

Unknown Soldier #1: I'm saved!

Unknown Soldier #2: Uh, I hate to bother you but I think that's my rifle you're holding.

Unknown Soldier #1: (firing randomly at the Freelancers ) What the hell are you talking about? Just grab any rifle! Like look at that, there is seriously a pile of rifles...

Unknown Soldier #2: (talking over him) No, that's my good luck rifle. That's the one I sleep with every night.

Unknown Soldier #1: Are you kidding me, man-?!

They both cry out as South kicks them off the platform. As the Freelancers fight, the Red Demo Man can be seen in the background getting back to his turret and aiming it at South.

North: South, look out!

North pushes her out of the way and gets shot several times in the chest and visor.

North: Gahhh!

South: North. NO!!

"Damn it!" Minne yells over comms. "Carolina, hurry!"

The female operative flips backward away from the line of fire and fires a grappling hook at the turret. It latches to the front.

Demo Man: What the- !?

The female operative yanks the hook backwards and the turret smacks the Demo Man in the face. It fires beneath him, collapsing the catwalk beneath. Most of the soldiers fall to their deaths, but the Demo Man falls on a ledge jutting out under the catwalk, and attempts to get up. South is seen helping North walk.

South: I got you. Move!

She tosses North against the railing rather painfully. The twins then both fire their weapons at the remaining soldiers.

South: Come in, command! We have wounded! You need to get us out of here, RIGHT NOW!!!

The female operative runs behind the twins and grabs them.

Female operative: Come on, you two. We're leaving.

She tosses herself off the edge and yanks North and South over with her.

There's a moment of silence, and the camera pans back to show the remaining soldiers moving toward the edge. Before they can get there, a Pelican rises up, with the Freelancers on the roof.

"Just in time." Minne says over comms.

Female operative: (gesturing) Sorry about the mess, fellas. (As she starts walking towards a hatch in the roof, she turns on her helmet radio.) Package is secure. Everybody on board.

She climbs down a ladder leading into the Pelican's troop bay. Where we see a soldier in red armor with white trim.

There is a Special DMR on his back.

That soldier is Agent Minnesota.

He holds his arms out. "Carolina! Miss me!"

Carolina ignores Minne and enters the cockpit and climbs into the co-pilot's seat.

"Okay, then." Ash lowers his arms.

"Somebody call for a ride?" The pilot says

"You're late." Carolina says.

Ash and South help North into a seat.

Pilot: Ah, well, you can take it out of my tip.

The Pelican pivots and flies off. The base explodes behind them.

Cut to Blood Gulch, with rockets hitting the cliff.

Ash is at the front of the Warthog.

"Nice shot!" Donut says to Simmons. "Hit them again, Simmons!"

"Roger!" Simmons says as he fires the rockets launcher at the cliff.

"It's too loud and big." Ash says. "Can we get rid of it?" Ash asks softly.

"No!" Donut says.

"Ok." 

"Did we hit 'em?" Sarge asks.

"I don't know, hard to tell." Simmons says.

"Missed, bitches!" Tucker yells from the cliff.

Ash gasps. "He said a bad word."

"Aw, damn it." Simmons swears and Ash gasps again.

"I have a plan." Donut starts. "We need to use stealth."

Simmons: Great idea.

Donut: Okay. Let's try this. Sir, you lay down some cover fire. Ash you stay here and use the rocket launcher. Simmons, the two of us can sneak around their backsides and slip on in.

Simmons: Ok. Just saying stealth was enough, man. We don't need to expand on good ideas. Especially after other people have already agreed to them.

Sarge: Sounds good, sir. I mean... wait. I'm the "Sir". But we should do that. Make it so.

Ash looks to the rocket launcher. "But, it's big and noisy." Ash softly says. "It makes things explode. I don't like that."

"Hey Reds! Yo!" Church yells. "Hold on a second, cease fire."

Donut: Who the hell is that?

Sarge: It's one of the Blue guys. He's just walkin' up here.

Ash hides behind the Warthog. "Scary!"

Donut: By himself? That guy is fucked.

Simmons: Totally.

Donut: He's gonna get totally fucked.

Simmons: Ok, see? Right there. You changed the way you said it again. Could you not do that please?

Church: Hey guys, hold up. Can you hear? Hello?

The Reds, minus Ash, open fire.

Church: (dodging the bullets) Ah! What the hell?! Cease fire man, it's me!

Donut: Yeah, we know it's you, dipshit. That's why we're shootin'.

Church: I just wanna talk for a second!

Simmons: Yeah, so what? What does that mean?

Church: You know, I just wanna talk to you about... uh... someth- ... oh shit. I think I fucked up. I fucked up, didn't I? You guys don't know who I am.

Sarge: Maybe we should give him a chance. See what he has to say. He could provide some intel by accident. Or give us the Blue perspective. I always wanted to hear that.

Donut: I wanna shoot him.

Simmons: Ok, just to be clear. I understand what you meant by that. I get that you want to shoot him with bullets.

Donut: Red-hot bullets.

Simmons: Please, it's enough.

Sarge: Let's hear him out. Then we shoot him.

Donut: How about I just wound him? Then he can still talk and I get to shoot him. That's a win-win.

Church: Not for me, I get shot!

Simmons: Ok, how about this? Donut gets to shoot you in exchange for you getting to say what you need to say.

Donut: Five minutes of talking, for one shot. Where do you want it, Blue? The shoulder or the foot?

Church: Well, obviously I would pick the foot, but I don't want you guys to shoot me in-

Donut: Deal.

Donut fires his pistol. Fade to black.

Church: OW! SON OF A BITCH!

Donut: Okay, your five minutes have started. Go.

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07-17-2022