Chapter 2: That Awkward Moment When You Introduce Your Harem To Your Mom

Elaine was slightly impressed with just how red Evelyn had managed to get, her cheeks flushing to nearly the same shade of red as her hair. Less amusing were the terrified expression and the trembling and when Elaine saw it she caught Evelyn in a tight hug and tried her best to calm her down.

“I'm sorry,” Elaine said quietly. “I should have been more careful.”

She heard and felt Evelyn swallow before the redhead whispered: “You're wrong.”

“Huh?” Elaine asked and looked down. Evelyn was still red-faced, still shivering, but suddenly she saw those signs in an entirely different light, even more so when she shifted and suddenly felt the heat radiating from between Evelyn's thighs, even stronger than before she'd fingered her to orgasm.

“I didn't think I would find the idea of being watched so hot,” Evelyn admitted. “That's what scares me.”

Elaine gave her a smirk. “Guess we'll have to explore that idea sometime soon, don't we?”

“Y-yeah.”

**

It took them a little longer to clean up and when they were finished they joined the rest of their team. Elaine wasn't all too surprised to find Prudence waiting with them.

“Evie!” Ophelia called out and rushed to catch Evelyn in a hug.

“I'm glad you're okay,” Alexis said, standing apart but smiling radiantly.

“Welcome back, badass,” Cassie said with a grin.

Abigail stood in the back and waved from the hip, Prudence right next to her.

Evelyn felt her cheeks warm as she looked at Prudence but from the way nobody was mentioning anything untoward she had to assume the angel hadn't told them. Then again, of their four other teammates three were in the same relationship Evelyn was so it wasn't as if anyone here would judge her for enjoying her girlfriend's company, right?

Right.

“Good to be back,” Evelyn finally said. “So, what happened while I was out?”

“Sweet fuck-all,” Cassie said cheerfully. “We've just been sitting here, waiting for the other shoe to drop.”

“Did you visit your families yet?” Evelyn asked.

“Nope,” Ophelia said. “We wanted to but someone decided that she needed her beauty sleep.”

“You're acting like you weren't worried about her,” Alexis said.

“Oh I was worried about her,” Ophelia said. “But she's fine so it's okay to joke around now.”

“It's okay,” Evelyn said, looking over at Alexis. “We can all go together now.”

And so they went, off in search of their families.

“Was there something you wanted to talk about?” Elaine asked Prudence as they headed towards the residential area of the camp, hanging back with the angel and watching her girls walk ahead.

Prudence blushed a little and stayed quiet for a little while before admitting: “I was going to ask how Evelyn was doing and how you were holding up, but...”

“I'm not going to apologize for being inappropriate,” Elaine said.

Prudence chuckled. “I'm not expecting you to. I walked in on you, that's on me. But you did do it in a relatively public space, with the door unlocked, so I'm not going to apologize either.”

“Fair,” Elaine said, then asked: “Does it bother you?”

“Does what bother me?” Prudence asked.

“That I'm with girls?” Elaine suggested. “That I'm dating multiple people?”

“Why would any of that bother me?” Prudence asked, her tone suggesting that the question wasn't rhetorical.

“I guess I'm still expecting someone from Heaven to judge me for it,” Elaine said. “Last I checked the Good Book has some strong things to say about this sort of thing.”

Prudence started chuckling. “You've met Jeanne, haven't you?” she asked.

Elaine didn't say anything, though she felt her cheeks warm. She hadn't just met Jeanne, she'd beheld Jeanne, in the most biblical of ways.

“If you're expecting judgment from Heaven you won't find it,” Prudence said. “The Bible is inspired by the Holy Spirit but it's still written by people. People living in their own realities, with their own biases, interpreting the messages they were given in their own contexts. Sometimes meaning is lost in that translation. But trust me when I say that, so long as you cherish your partners, so long as your relationships with them allow you all to nurture each other, then neither the Lord nor the Council have any problem with it. I will say that the more people you gather into this kind of relationship the harder it will get to keep them all happy but you know that already, don't you?”

“Y-yeah,” Elaine said. This was a new perspective for her. She hadn't expected to be told outright that Heaven wouldn't judge her for her relationships. But something was nagging at her. “What about you though?”

“Huh?”

“You said Heaven wouldn't judge me,” Elaine said. “But what about you?”

“You care that much what I think?”

“I know nothing about you,” Elaine said. “Until recently I thought of you as just a powerful angel, aloof and stoic. But that's not all you are, is it?”

Prudence chuckled. “True enough.”

“So?”

“I would be the biggest fucking hypocrite if I judged you,” Prudence said. “If anything, I'm jealous.”

“Of me?” Elaine suddenly had a horrible suspicion. Prudence was Jeanne's subordinate, wasn't she? Did Prudence carry a torch for her boss? Was she angry that Elaine had gotten to fuck her?

But Prudence alleviated her fears when she said: “Of Jeanne. Of Evelyn. And of the others. You're a great piece of ass, Elaine. I can see what they see in you.”

Elaine's mouth hung open. She hadn't expected the angel to come on to her so blatantly.

“Let's talk this over once the danger is dealt with,” Prudence said. “You realize this is just the calm before the storm, right?”

Elaine let out a breath. “Yeah. Something bad is coming.”

“You two coming?” Cassie called out and Elaine looked up to notice that the entire group was standing in front of one of the housing units.

She joined the rest of her team and then looked at the list of doorbells next to the front door.

There were many names she didn't recognize but what she did notice was the name 'Caldwell' right above the name 'Bigsby'.

“What are the odds?” she asked quietly.

“That's what I thought,” Alexis said. “Oh god, what if our parents can't stand each other?”

“Considering what a spectacular daughter they have I have no doubt your parents are amazing people so there's no way that's a problem.”

“You sweet-talker,” Alexis said, her tone exasperated but a soft smile on her lips.

“Which bell should we ring first?” Evelyn asked.

“Definitely Elaine's,” Alexis said instantly.

Elaine's lips thinned as she heard that. This was a pivotal point in their relationship. Elaine had never asked whether Alexis' family knew about her preferences, whether they were fine with her being attracted to women. And even if they were, would they be fine with her dating a woman who had three other partners? How would she explain that? Hell, how would she explain that to her own family?

Hi, mom and dad, yeah, I'm back. Yeah, I have a harem now, no big deal. Oh, and by the way, I am ageless and immortal now.

She swallowed at that last thought. She still believed she'd made the right decision, but...

She shook herself out of it, reached past her girls and rang the doorbell for Caldwell.

**

Lieutenant General Francis Hayworth was feeling frustrated. Again.

Part of that came with the job. Hayworth was in charge of Project Divinity, overseeing the development of a squad of superhuman soldiers spearheaded by a mad scientist so amoral he got kicked out of Hell. He was also not a very politically correct person so oftentimes he considered himself the tard wrangler of Base 15, keeping the various egos and their eccentricities in check and considering where to allocate which resources. All in all he considered himself to be fairly good at his job. There had been no major issues with the Project so far, the casualties were significantly below what had been expected, and despite being astronomically weaker than the other staff members both the staff and the cadets respected his authority. Professor Stollos' insistence on leaving the cadets at the Ohio refugee camp had actually been the first time any of the other staff members had gone against his explicit wishes. Although, to be fair, the Professor had bargained for only a few days, trying to come to an agreement instead of simply opposing him.

Frankly, that concerned Francis. Not so much the Professor disagreeing with him, but the way he'd bargained for those two extra days. That, more than anything else, had convinced Francis that an attack was indeed still coming. The Professor was many things. Brilliant, ethically challenged, fucking batshit crazy if those facial expressions of his were anything to go by, but most of all, behind all the cynicism, behind all the mad scientist mannerisms, behind all the barely restrained power, Francis knew the Professor's type. He was an idealist. There were things the Professor genuinely believed in, ideals he would give everything to uphold. And that made him easy to work with. Because those ideals of his aligned almost perfectly with what Francis needed of the man. But that also meant that if the Professor gave him dire warnings he would be a madman not to listen to them.

But aside from the military concerns there were other reasons he was frustrated. For example the fact that he hadn't been able to see his wife in seven months, except for some sporadic video calls. Even that would have been okay. There weren't enough hours in the day when it came to running Base 15 after all. He could have spent his time immersing himself in his work just fine, if not for Rachel.

Rachel was the nurse in charge of Base 15's infirmary, a succubus with terrifyingly powerful healing magic, the daughter of Lilith and Adam and the step-daughter of Lucifer himself. And Rachel had been coming on to Francis very aggressively as of late.

At some point he'd stopped thinking of her as 'Nurse' Rachel and simply thought of her as Rachel now and he wasn't quite sure when it had changed.

No, that wasn't right. He knew damn well when he'd dropped the title in his mind.

The last time he'd tried to vent his frustrations with a video call to his wife they'd been interrupted by their daughters. Francis loved his daughters with all his heart but goddamn it, a man had needs and their interruption had come at the worst possible time. It was even worse considering one of the last things his wife had said to him during their playtime.

You need to fuck her, daddy.

His wife had told him, not implied but told him, to fuck Rachel. Rachel had been trying to get him to cheat on his wife with her for months now. And after all the frustrations, after all the times he'd denied himself for the sake of his marriage, his wife had told him to sleep with this other woman, her only demand being that he would have to send her photo evidence of it that she could use to masturbate.

So right now he was in a situation where he couldn't really think of a good reason not to visit Rachel anymore. He could cite his principles and his unwillingness to be unfaithful but his wife had explicitly asked him to do it. He could cite the fact that it was unprofessional to do that kind of thing with a colleague but it wasn't as if literally anyone else at the compound cared about that. So the only thing he had left was his own sheer bloody-mindedness. He'd held back for so long despite her goading and the fact that pretty much nobody recognized the effort he'd put into upholding his principles annoyed him.

But at the same time he wasn't stubborn enough not to admit that he was reaching his breaking point. In fact he could argue that there was no better time to do it considering all the cadets were currently out and so the chance of any intimate encounter with Rachel sparking awkward rumors was at a minimum. There was just one concern left. What about Jeanne?

Last Francis checked the angel had something going on with Rachel. Would she be jealous? He had an enormous amount of respect for the living legend and upsetting her was the last thing he wanted.

He could of course raise the issue with either of them but doing so would mean he had to tacitly admit what he wanted of the succubus.

He sighed and stared down at his desk, at the picture of his wife, smiling that slightly naughty smile that always reminded him of what she'd been wearing under her clothes when this picture had been taken.

You need to fuck her, daddy.

**

When the door opened Alexis knew without needing to be told that the woman in front of them was Elaine's mother. The resemblance was striking, though not quite as striking as she would have expected. Elaine had clearly gotten most of her facial features as well as the fluffy brown hair from her mother. The height and the muscles clearly must have come from her dad, though, because the woman in front of them was positively tiny, slender and waifish and barely five feet tall. She looked like a pixie come to life. The comparison turned even more apt when the woman saw who had rang her doorbell and started crying as she threw herself at her daughter, her eyes going all glossy as she began tearing up.

“Hey mom, I'm home,” Elaine said, her tone as soft as Alexis had ever heard it.

“Elaine,” her mom sobbed, “How are you here?”

“You were in danger,” Elaine said. “You didn't expect me to stay out of that, did you?”

Elaine's mom leaned away and grabbed her daughter by the shoulders, then studied her. “Wait. You're saying you're with those superheroes who saved us?”

“Yes,” Elaine said.

“You look good,” Elaine's mom said. “Strong, happy, confident.”

“Come on mom, we've talked just a couple weeks ago, remember?”

“Yes, and you didn't look anywhere near this happy then,” Elaine's mom said. “Now, are you going to use those manners I taught you and introduce me to your friends?”

“They're my team, mom,” Elaine said, her tone far too petulant for the kind of badass she usually was.

“Nice to meet you, ma'am,” Evelyn said, stepping forward and holding out her hand to shake. “I'm Evelyn.”

“What a polite young woman,” Elaine's mom said, causing Ophelia to let out a snort. Elaine's mom paid it no mind as she shook Evelyn's hand. “I'm Emily, this beanstalk's mother.”

“Nice to meet you, Emily,” Cassie said in the exaggeratedly chipper tone Alexis was beginning to think of as his 'streamer voice', “I'm Cassie!”

And so things went, everyone introducing themselves and having Emily either shake their hands or engulf them in hugs. When everyone else was done Alexis stepped forward.

“Nice to meet you, ma'am,” she said. “I'm Alexis.”

Emily shook her hand with a smile, then her eyes narrowed as she scrutinized her. “I can't put my finger on it but you look familiar.”

“I-I don't think we've met,” Alexis said. “B-but...”

“How good do you know the Bigsbys, mom?”, Elaine asked.

“You mean downstairs?” Emily asked. “They're great. We spend time with them almost every day. Why?” She paused, then looked at Alexis again. Finally she smiled and said: “Well, that explains a lot. Your parents rave about you, you know?”

“U-um,” Alexis stammered out.

“And I'm beginning to see why,” Emily added.

Alexis felt herself blushing but clearly Emily didn't want to embarrass her any further because she said:

“Come in, come in, no need to stay out there.”

**

Elaine had brought girlfriends home before. Many times, in fact. Even so, this situation still felt incredibly awkward to her. She was seated on a couch, Alexis and Ophelia to either side of her and Evelyn and Cassie next to them in turn. Abigail and Prudence were sitting on a smaller sofa off to the side and Emily was on a little love seat opposite her daughter. Without explicitly stating things, Elaine's lovers had all staked their claim on her by seating arrangements alone. And Elaine's mom clearly picked up on it.

“Excuse me if this comes across as rude,” she said, “normally I'm better at noticing these sorts of things, I promise, but... which one of you is dating my daughter?”

Elaine cringed as Alexis, Ophelia, Evelyn and Cassie all raised their hands.

“Elaine Sydney Caldwell,” Emily intoned, outrage in her voice. “I did not raise you to be some sort of casanova who sleeps around on her partners!”

Elaine cringed again. At the three-naming, at the tone and at the accusation. She'd almost managed to convince herself that this kind of relationship was fine, that she wasn't a cheating bitch, but having her mother lay it out like that brought things back into perspective.

But then, before she could start feeling even worse about it, her lovers rushed to her defense.

“You've got it all wrong, ma'am,” Alexis said.

“We're fine with her having other partners,” Evelyn added.

“If you're going to blame anyone, blame us,” Ophelia said. “We convinced her to do this.”

Elaine's mom blinked. “Wh- b- I...”

Elaine smiled as she looked at her lovers coming to her defense like that, then looked at her mom and said: “I know it's weird. I felt awful about it at first. I was scared of messing this up. But it works. Alexis, Ophelia, Evelyn and Cassie, they're all precious to me.”

Her mom stared a bit longer, then took a deep breath and asked: “So, how did this happen?”

For a moment Elaine couldn't answer her mother because she was too busy staring at the notifications telling her that Alexis, Ophelia and Evelyn had reached Bond Level 9 while Cassie had reached Bond Level 7.