Have you ever been really tired? When your thoughts start to drift around between world of dreams and reality. Your eyes hurt. You struggle to stand when your entire body wants to give up and lay down. You start to hear voices, see strange things in the corner of your eye. But you dont care cause you're so tired.

Everything so floaty. Concecrate on reality. Concetration. What was I doing? Find management office of this idiotic Academy. Find my room. Get to the bed. Bed is good. Earth here is good too, but i need to get to the bed. Why though? Floor is good too?

Look at the map. Its written here. Management office. Letters attack my eyes with sharp edges. I look up. A gate into the Academy complex. Management office is so far...

- Hello, um, do you maybe need help? (Uknown girl) - a girl's voice. An ugly, fat, blackhaired girl with too big glasses and greesy face. She's tall too, so she's really massive.

Help. Do I need? I look at her with dull eyes. Her words at last spark my last pair of synapses that weren't striking because of too long work hours. She fidgets nervously under my stare.

Small. Fidgety. Dark. Selfhate. Need for appreciation. Loneliness. Fear. Hope. Weak Talent. Determination.

So tired.

SO BLAND. Oh, shut up.

- Management office.(Me)

- So, um, are you looking um, for your room? I can... um, show you the way?(Helpful girl)

Selfhate. More selfhate. Nervousness. Stress.

I shut down for a few seconds. Did i hear something?

Shut up. I DIDNT SAY ANYTHING. YOU'RE HALLUCINATING. She wants to lead. To office. Where is bed. Ouh it hurts to think so much.

- Yes.(Me)

Small explosion of happiness. Ouh, my eyes. Don't think. Forward.

- O Oh, s... so i'll lead the way, ok?(Helpful girl)

She went throught the gate and i followed. It looks like the acadamy was a one big old looking building in the middle of a giant park. And other, smaller buildings. There were multiple trees around. Trees were happy because of warm sun. Sun is good. There are ants here, too.

- S... so there a building where all p...people... - she forgot a word - Teachers live. There is a secretary too. There is.. a board. In front of it. There writes um, is written. Where your room is for now. You dont need management office.(Helpful girl)

So i dont need to talk to anyone. Good. Why is it so faaaaar though. At least there is sun.

- Ok.(Me)

There were other students around, walking with their baggage. Looking for probably the excatly same thing as me. Sounds of people talking to each other. Seniors guiding their juniors, inviting them into clubs.

- Um... you passed the Etheral Compability test?(Helpful girl)

I remained silent.

- Yeah, of course you did, how would you be here otherwise. I am stupid, ha ha....(Helpful sad girl)

Awkwardness shines with fidgety lights. We walk forward. I am so tired.

How long till we get to the board.

- I am a second year. If you have any questions... Like what clubs to choose? Or about teachers... Some are really scary, ha ha...(Helpful sad girl)

I repeated myself.

Sour and rotten stink of self hate. I am soooo tired. Oh, pidgeons. Focused on some humans that can feed them. Fat pidgeons

We walk for some time. So much green. Green weed, green trees... green hair? No matter. We walk next to some buildings. One stinks of adrenaline, of chaos. It jumps like lightning. It wants to move. Arena. A place for fights.

In another place the earth is wet with grey color of struggle and tiredness. Physical training. The sweat got into the earth.

Another building is scary. The smell of blood, pain, fear. But not strong. Smell of medicines. Of disinfecting. A hospital?
No smell of death?

An excited building. Full of screams of happiness, applause. A good building. Place of music. Echo of a thousand songs.

And lastly a building of older people. A stressed and lazy building. I dont like it. Teacher building.

- Uh, so, the board is there. - She pointed with her hand. - I am Evelyn... So if you ever need any help... You can ask for me? So... Goodbye.(Helpful sad girl)

She made a little bow and turned away.

- Angel.(Me)

- What?(Evelyn surprised helpful girl)

- My name. And thank you. (Me)

- Huh? Ah, uh... You're welcome? (Evelyn helpful girl)

I walked away from the small explosion of confusion and then happiness. On the board were nailed down several lists. A group of people was reading them and then going their way. Other first years. They were talking to each other. Getting to know their peers. Oh, what a bother.

There were three teenagers next to me, talking. Brown, Blue and White.

- Oh, why cant we be roommates?(White)

- Its temporary anyway. After the test we will be assigned to a new room. (Brown)

- Do you maybe know your Ether Alignment? If we get the same we could get into same class.(Blue)

- I got Earth Ether predispositions. I will know for sure after the test, but I am quite confident. (Brown)

- Wait, you guys already know your alignments? Dont you need the test for it? (White)

- There are online guides on how to guess it. For the example there is difference in effect of self reinforcement based on your alignment. If you are Earth you get more mass, toughness and strength. Air makes you have less mass, greater speed and reflexes. Fire gets you strengthened overall with explosive power. Water strengthens like fire, but makes you more flexible.(Brown)

- Flexible? Like you can touch your knees with head?(White)

- Yea, during the reinforcment. (Brown)

- I can do that even without. (Blue)

- And how do you reinforce?(White)

- Its like adrenaline. When you want to fight or flee your body activates it.(Brown)

- I never did it. Are there other ways to guess?(White)

- Character traits i guess? But its not that accurate. Earth are usually responsible, practical and hardworking.(Brown)

- Oh, stop gloating. What are the others.(White)

- Water are flexible, adaptive and empathetic, Fire are assertive, loud and commanding and Air are freespirited, forgetful and creative. (Brown)

Brown and Blue looked at White with suspicion.

- What? I am not that forgetful! Things just sometimes... dislocate themselves!

- Do you remember how we looked for your bicycle for an hour and then you realized you actually didnt take bicycle with you? (Blue)

- Or when you forgot your sandwich in your backpack for some weeks? And then you let me borrow it?(Brown)

- And tell me how often do you get to places on time? I started telling you the time we meet an hour before it actually is so you are on time.(Blue)

- Ok, ok, maybe sometimes I am a little forgetful, but... Wait, you are actually coming hour late, too? And then you guys berate me for being late?!(White)

Blue put his hand on White's shoulder.

- No not at all. But you really fit an Air guy.(Blue with stone face)

- No! I am not an Airhead...

They walked away talking. I looked at the list to find my name.

STRANGE AURAS.

What strange auras?

ALL OF THEM. SO MANY COLORS. DIFERENT. STRANGE. SPICY. HOT. SEGREGATED. EVEN ECHOS ARE STRANGE.

Awesome. They were probably this way before the End.

List.

My name.

Angel. Angel Hope. I said they could give me any surname, but really.

Its hard to read.

THIS LIST DOESNT HAVE YOUR NAME.

Fuck.

THERE IS ONLY A SIMILAR ONE. HERE.

A puff of black smoke appeared around one of the written names.

Angela Hope FE136

Maybe they made a mistake. Oh my fucking god.

CHECK YOUR ID.

What. I got it out of my back pack. There were some papers next to it but i never bothered to check what they actually are. Something about refuge permission.

Whatever.

I looked at the blue piece of plastic i got a month ago through some bullshit procedure.

My face stared at me from the photo. I looked like a victim of hunger from the south. Black, sunken eyes. Skin streched thightly on bones, dry lips. Dark hair in soldier style, which is like a centimeter long.

I looked myself in the dark eyes. I dont like doing that. Its like they were accusing me of everything. Thats why I never checked my ID.

UNHCR no.:

791-0C0916

Name:

ANGELA AUBREY HOPE

Country of origin:

North Edrin

Sex:

Female

Issued date:

09.07.1997

Renewal date:

09.07.2002

The card was full of QR codes and barcodes.

I was too tired to curse. I just wanted to lay down and forget about everything.

Mistake in ID.

I walked away from the board and found a bench I could sit on. I stopped thinking for some minutes, just looking around. At the beautiful, hot sun. It was like 30 celcius, a really warm day. Other students were walking next to the bench and dragging their bags to the living quarters.

I dont have to hurry anywhere. I am so tired of it all. Maybe I will just sleep here? Maybe I won't wake up?

Why is everything always going wrong. Again and again and again. Mistakes. Mistakes and more mistakes. Errors. You could solve them just like that but you decided to not care. To overlook it. And here you go.

No matter what you touch it always falls apart. No matter how hard you try you always lose everything. Again and again.

Whats the point of it all.

WAIT A MOMENT!!! NO, NO, NO. BRO, DON'T DO ME LIKE THAT. THERE IS ALWAYS... NEXT MEAL? GOOD THINGS? LIKE... SUN? YOU SAID ITS GOOD. DONT FALL APART!!!

Yea, sun. Good thing. I wonder how long it will take for someone to destroy it here, too. Everything will end. There will be always someone to fuck everything up. And even if i try to stop it I will fail. So what's the point of it all. I am so tired. I need to sleep.

YOU SLEPT FOR THE LAST 20 HOURS. YOU DONT NEED TO SLEEP.

I just want to forget about everything.

NO... NO! I AM DISSOLVING! AAAAARGH!

One girl came with a bunch of big men in black suits. Bodyguards. They were sweating buckets surrounding the blond girl and listening to her complains. She was wearing a totally not accustomed to this weather long blue dress and a white hat.

- What do you mean she doesnt want to move? Just make her? Give her some money. (girl with bodyguards)

- We tried persuading her, my lady, but she doesnt want to change rooms. If you just wait a little we will find you another room.(Tired, sweating, annoyed, bald bodyguard)

- No? I don't care! Lead me to my room and throw her out! I am Isabella Awanet and I will not stand it! What do you take me for! (Spoiled girl with bodyguards)

- We are doing what we can to...(Poor, bald bodyguard/servant).

- Then do what you can't do! I am not paying you for nothing! My god, why are you all so incompetent! All I am asking for is a room for myself! Is it this difficult?! Why you didnt take care of it earlier? I swear, I will talk to my father and have you all fired! Fired I say! Its boiling and I am standing here, waiting for you idiots to do something! And you do nothing. What are you paid for?! Run and bring me something cold to drink. (Angry girl with bodyguards)

- Um, what excatly do you want to drink? (A really stressed bald bodyguard)

- TAKE A GUESS!!!(Angry girl with bodyguards)

- Yes, of course. On it.(Stressed bald bodyguard)

He walked away with fast steps.

- Why are you not running?!(girl with bodyguards).

He started running.

- Motherfucking spoiled brat.(Bald bodyguard under breath).

The blond girl breathed deeply in and out and looked around, challenging with her stare anyone that would dare to look. She stared down a couple of interested in drama students.

Then she looked at me. Our eyes met.

I could look down. I could avoid confrontation with someone visibly angry with connections. But I am so tired.

OH! OH! CHILD! CHILD! COME HERE! ATTACK HIM! WAKE HIM UP!

You are so annoying. Shut up. It's not like she can hear you. Or maybe it doesnt matter. Yea, it doesnt.

- What the hell are you looking at? (Annoying girl with bodyguards)

Her blue eyes focused on me with anger. Challenge of authority. Daring me to say something.

I looked at her.

She looked at me.

I am so tired.