“It’s a miracle,” the healer said as he finished examining me. “Nothing short of a miracle.”

“So you’re saying other the headache is normal and other than that I’m perfectly healthy?” I asked. “Why did my chest hurt?”

“Yes. You’re simply a bit dehydrated. And regarding the pain, your body had recovered, but your brain, uh, how should I put this, didn’t receive the message. Thus it felt like you were still pierced by a crossbow bolt.”

“I see…” I said, running my chest.

A nurse came over and whispered something in the healer’s ear.

She was a tall, slim brunette. Very pretty. Sizeable breasts under her nurse robes. A girl like that doesn’t have to be a nurse to make money in Ratia. She also didn’t wear any jewelry or makeup. Clearly she was actually passionate about the job.

That’s the reasoning I came up with after I smiled and asked her name, and received quite the cold shoulder as she scoffed and walked out of the room.

“She’s quite busy,” the healer said. “So, you are completely healthy. Once you pay your bill, you can leave.”

Ah. Right.

“About that…” I said, trying to remember if I even had any money to begin with. “Did you bring me in here with my personal items? My wallet perhaps?”

“No. You were brought here stark naked. It was surprising you maintained your erection through such a loss of blood,” the healer said, then seemed to remember something, “Ah, but someone did leave a bag with a note a few days ago. I’ll go fetch it.”

The doctor went out of the room, leaving me to sit, butt naked but for a grey robe that barely reached past my thighs and would be absolutely no use if any more attractive nurses came in.

After I had woken up, they moved me to the main treatment hall. It seemed to be quite the slow day as the only other people in the large room were two young adventurers who honestly didn’t even seem injured. One of them was happily chatting with the tall nurse from before by his bed.

The adventurer noticed me and asked her something.

The nurse said something to the man and both gave me a look of utter disgust before she moved on to the other patient.

“Here it is,” the healer said and handed me a small bag and a parchment note attached to it.

If he doesn’t make it, please accept this as a donation

The bag itself contained twenty silver coins.

“So, how much is my bill, exactly?” I asked.

“It’s 332 silver and 22 copper,” the healer replied.

“And what happens if I can’t pay my bill?”

“We’ll have to turn you in to the authorities. You’ll likely be assigned some penal labor to pay the debt.”

And the bastard was saying it in such a pleasant manner. The healthcare costs in this world were even a bigger rip off than on earth.

It was a good thing I maxed charisma.

“I have an idea,” I said. “I can provide something to your establishment that will be worth far more than the bill of one patient.”

The doors to the healing center burst open and the healer emerged onto the street.

“It’s a miracle!” he declared atop of his voice. “A divine miracle!”

Some people stopped to see what was going on.

I came out after the healer. “I came to this place, with a crossbow bolt in my heart!” I declared just as loudly. “And after a mere seven days, I have been healed!”

“It is true!” the healer said. “If he had arrived an hour later he would have been dead!”

  “The good people of this place took care of me, and not a week later, all I have left is this mark!” I said and removed the robe, revealing a scar on my chest, which was definitely not created with some pastes the healer had lying around.

Also I was completely naked. That was the healer’s idea, not mine.

I stepped down to the street, continuing the performance in the nude. “Hear me, good people! This place, its clearly touched by the divine!”

“For such a miracle to occur,” the healer continued his. “Our house of healing must have been blessed by the gods!”

“I would have died if I have gone to any other healer!” I said as more and more people came in to see what all the shouting was about. “This was divine intervention!”

The healer came down to the street beside me.

“Thank you! Thank you oh great healer! I am only alive thanks to you!” I said, turning to him.

“Thanks are not necessary, my friend, I am but a humble healer doing his duty!” he replied.

“A man blessed by the gods!” I declared and gave him a hearty hug.

“You’ll come back for another show next week,” he reminded me in a whisper.

“I will,” I whispered back. “Now do your shtick. There’s like fifty people here”

“Thank you, master healer,” I said as we separated. “Thank you for saving my life!”

“It was nothing, my friend, nothing but my duty!” he replied shaking my hand and letting me walk into the crowd.

I passed through them, smiling and holding out my chest to let the shocked citizens look at my chest, though without enough time to examine the scar too closely. Some even touched my arms as I passed like I was a good luck charm. Most made sure not to look down at my groin area, while mothers covered their children’s eyes and some girls blushed and looked away.

“We also sell health and stamina charms!” I heard the healer behind me. “From a house of healing so blessed by the gods, they are obviously of far higher quality!”

I snuck my way to an alley where I put the robe back on.

The people behind me were far too busy flocking to by their own piece of divine blessing.

Things just worked in this world when you had high charisma.

I even managed to convince the healer to let me keep the twenty silver.

Not that it would get me anything more than a week’s worth of cheap food. The hospital rag I was dressed in also wouldn’t do.

First thing’s first, I had to buy some pants.

Second, I needed to visit a recently well-off friend in a certain cave in the mountains to the east of town.

It was time to fuck with a dragon.

Yes I know what I said.