My name is Nathan, a guy in his early twenties who doesn't talk much. That's really all about me: I have some hobbies, like chess; some skills, like playing the flute; my friends can be counted in one hand, they're all over the world; my job sucks and I've just lost my girlfriend.  Nevermind all that.

Let’s talk about something happier, more or less. Something I'm willing to talk about. I am currently near the end of my Nth run in a game that was released a few years ago. I don’t play games too much and I am very picky with my interests, but this game is considered bad by the critics and the gamer community... for a very simple reason: it is frustrating. 

I’m talking about the old-school turn-based RPG Deadly Dreams. The setup is pretty simple and cliche: you start as a young student in a battle academy, in a world ravaged by nightmarish creatures. But due to the urgency of the situation, the students were expected to act on dangerous missions more often than not, so casualties are always high. This worked itself out because the strength was relative: each character had a strong setting of beliefs that gives him power. For instance, if someone believed that he could fly on the sky unimpeded, as long as this belief was strong enough it would become a reality. On the other hand, if that person was assaulted by insecurities or doubts, that ability would weaken or not surface at all. The admitted students all had a strong belief in something, which was condensed in a single phrase.

That thing made for a very interesting and dynamic system, but it had terrible consequences for the AI regulated game. Runs were often disastrous, with few players managing until the end scenario by using hacks or blatantly OP beliefs, but even in this situation the game could fuck you up: there was a counter to literally everything. If you made an insanely overpowered character, a mere doppelganger would crush your entire party before crushing you. Another popular one was an enemy undermining this belief, so that you lost your powers temporarily to be one shot. There was no sense of scaling either, you could die day one with an ideal party or day one thousand with a subpar one, but you would never reach the true ending. 

Still, I really liked the story and each run managed to bring a new piece from every character, so that me and a bunch of fellow sufferers stuck to this dead game. Right now, I was getting uselessly emotional about the end of my latest character’s life. It was the first time I had reached the final boss and actually managed to make a dent into her HP bar before getting one shot. Not only that, I managed to keep one person alive with me after the first attack. And so I paid attention to the final dialogue I've never personally witnessed:

“I’m sorry, Nathan, if it wasn’t for my weakness... Cough* cough*”, the girl character Amelia coughed a few pixels of blood. She was poisoned and would die next turn.

Amelia Wintersong was unquestionably one of the most OP characters in the Deadly Dreams universe, but few people partied with her because it generally could only be done early on and she was always sent on the most dangerous missions. She was amongst the 0.03% with a complex belief system, summed up by the phrase “I build my own reality”, granting her the power to alter reality to her will and imagination. However, it still had limitations when working directly with other people. If you didn’t manage to enter the team early, she would have disappeared after two years, put to sleep forever as a curse during a mission where she was the lone survivor. Finding her depended on an insane amount of luck.

Now why did an OP character die so easily, one would ask... It was my miscalculation. Nevertheless, she didn't go past turn 5.

My character soon cooked up some cheesy lines.

“... We will get it right the next time, don’t worry."

The belief I chose for my character this time was “I am inside a game”, which added a few more functions to the game, as if I was playing in developer mode. In that light, it wouldn’t be surprising if Nathan in the game understood he was being controlled. Sometimes, he would enter in a monologue saying 'Whoever you are, please leave a sign so that I know you are with me', or if I made a small mistake 'Don’t fuck around! Take this seriously!', even giving me advice 'That won’t work, we should flee'. I did my best, pal, sorry if it wasn’t good enough...

The talk was cut short by the sudden death of Amelia, and the villain entered her monologue. It was the famous one-liner before game over.

“Poor souls, what a useless struggle. At least you went out peacefully, a quick death is the least I can do...”

Only, this time, it wasn't immediate game over. Makes sense, as my character was technically alive with 3 HP.

“I’ve witnessed countless children come and go, throughout billions of years in many separate or alternate dimensions. Some of them reincarnated, some of them the same person, but they all fought for the same futile thing: to get out of this reality. Tell me, why do you persist in this pointless life?”

Marian, the last boss, was a disillusioned woman who went mad after her world-view shattered, strengthening her powers but completely alienating herself from this reality. Little is known of her, as she immediately attacked and killed any creature on sight.

My character answered soon after.

“Because I know that the next time will be different. That I will be stronger and my companions will live... and that there is something to be gained after the game clear.”

He didn’t appear to be confused by her mentions of reincarnation or parallel dimensions. Probably because the new generation in Deadly Dreams was very open minded and usually didn't interfere with others' opinions or world views. But specially because he knew it kind of applied to the game reality.

Still, the answer disturbed me. Because I understood that there was nothing for them after beating the boss. New content? An achievement? A happy or sad cutscene? No matter how real it appeared, it was all data by the end of the day.

However, there was no game over this time. Only a static screen for a while. Then, the scene proceeded in a strange way.

“Next time?... So, you also understand the nature of this world, yet you do not despair? How is this possible?”

“Because I believe... I believe wholeheartedly that I can change this reality!”

“... If that’s so, I have a proposal for you. Would you hear me out?”

[Achievement unlocked: True Ending]

[Inheritance System unlocked]

[Character Nathaniel Bloodstone has unlocked a second belief: I build my own reality]

[Marian would like to issue a New Quest. Do you wish to accept it? Y/N”]

[Warning: this quest cannot be cancelled until completed]

My screen was bombarded by notification after notification, so that I was left completely speechless. However, my excitement soon carried over, I was entering uncharted territory! I quickly clicked each box.

[Achievement unlocked: True Ending]

<Congratulations! The true ending can only be achieved by completing the following conditions: PC has the same belief system as Marian, The Exile; Amelia Wintersong is in the party; Maximum affinity between PC and Amelia Wintersong; PC and Amelia Wintersong alive on second turn of the last boss fight.

Reading this, I unknowingly muttered “no wonder”. The belief “I am inside a game” was not particularly OP, so getting it through the first hit was close to impossible even with good RNG. That was not to mention having Amelia in the party, striking a perfect friendship with this loner and surviving alongside her. Those conditions seemed to be quite exclusive, I would never go for it if I knew them beforehand.

[Inheritance System unlocked]

<Your last PC's story carries on to the past, granting your new PC skills, abilities and knowledge it could never possess. All PCs from now on get a stat growth and point bonuses, and access to a experience type belief slot. Monster hunts and quests are warned two weeks prior in-game time. Major random events are fixed in the ledger. New dialogue, characters and story lines unlocked. Some of these bonuses are optional>

I was very excited at this. With so many boons, I finally had a glimmer of hope that I could maybe beat Marian.

I skipped the second belief notification, thinking it didn’t matter since Nathan inside the game was going to die anyway, though it was thematically fitting that he came to carry on Amelia's belief system. Unfortunately it didn’t happen earlier.

[Marian would like to issue a New Quest. Do you wish to accept it? Y/N”]

<Marian, The Exile, wishes to send you to the past whenever you die, to taste the same experience she once went through. She would like to see if you still keep to your beliefs until the bitter end>

[Warning: this quest cannot be cancelled until completed]

<This quest carries on to following playthroughs. If you wish to renege on the fixed timeline to alter the course of events, you should reject this quest. It will always be available after reaching the final scenario>

My answer, then, couldn’t be more obvious. Even if my current playthrough sucked, it was hard enough to reach Marian, I didn't know when I would be able to do it again. I immediately pressed yes, my character seemed to ponder for a moment before nodding, and Marian continued her dialogue.

“Such tenacity. Let’s see how long it lasts."

Marian extended her hand and blew my character to pieces, followed by the Game Over screen. I would excitedly create a new character, but suddenly I was feeling very uncomfortable. My head hurt and my heart quickened its beats, so that I couldn’t think straight.

Hastily I searched for my phone, I lived alone and such a sudden onset of illness could be nothing good. I quickly dialed for an ambulance, but my strength was rapidly failing me.

Before I could hear the person on the other end of the line, my consciousness left me.

...

....

.....

On waking up, my memories were jumbled and I felt dizzy, as if I was just out of the rollercoaster, which I had terrible affinity with. I felt the sudden urge to vomit, but I managed to hold it in as I didn't want to clean up the mess latter. I hastily looked for the exit to the bathroom, but the light was so strong that it blinded my eyes.

Annoyed, I could only wonder who in the hell opened the curtains so suddenly, but my eyes quickly adapted to the light as I scanned for the door.

However, this wasn’t my minimalistic room with little space and a very obvious entrance, nor was it anywhere near my house or this country. Around me, I could see hundreds of youngsters orderly arranged along a stadium of glowing lights, a small podium erected before each one of them and myself, all paying attention to the six erected pillars in the middle, from which a hologram was delivering a speech, sometimes compassionate but often severe. I seemed to completely forget about my nausea as I stared into the old man with blue shaders moving his mouth.

“... You are the chosen amongst hundreds of thousands, that can fight the irregularities and win, giving hope to humanity and civilization. I know, this is a severe responsibility for new students, but time is limited and we can spare no one, not even you children...”

Looking sad, the old man closed his eyes and seemed to suppress a tear. The discourse felt oddly familiar, until I heard an unmistakable line.

“Many will die, but with each sacrifice humanity grows stronger and closer to the truth. Do not be discouraged, for if you have something you believe in, something to protect, we of the old generation also believe in our mission and will put our lives on the line to protect you.”

... This was definitely Principal Ashton’s discourse of the welcoming ceremony, this line was one of the first he spoke in the series, just after the character setup and difficulty choice. But what the hell was going on? Did I get so excited that I hallucinated I was inside of the game?

Suddenly, another bolt of headache took over and my vision started to get swarmed with blue screens, which only disappeared after the discourse was over. I couldn’t pay attention to any of it.

The only thing that made sense was the clear voice ringing in my head after the headache stopped.

[Synchronization complete, Inheritance accepted]

[ID: Nathaniel Bloodstone

Belief: I am inside a game (B+) (Spiritual Series)

Experience belief: (empty slot)

Level: 0/56

Stats:

Conviction: 8 +0.33/lvl; E-

Concentration: 3.6 (5) +0.33/lvl; F

Quick Thinking: 5.6 (7) +0.25/lvl; E-

Agility: 4.6 (7) +0.33/lvl; E-

Spirit: 3 (4); F

Traits:

From the Blood Garden (SS);

Desensitized (D);

Coward (D).

Abilities:

Foretell (C+) (lvl 1/5)

Martial Arts (C-) (passive) (lvl 3/10)

Deadly Strike (D+) (lvl 5/7)

Skills:

System Panel (SS) (passive) (lvl max)

Hacking (B) (lvl ¼)

Overwrite (SS) (passive) (lvl 2/???)

Status effects:

Marian’s Quest;

Malnutrition.

Available points: 0 (+2.25/lvl)]

My first reaction was of being dumbfounded, unfortunately I didn’t have much time to adapt before the hologram phased out and the platform circle beneath me started to sink. My heart was clasped by desperation, but seeing everyone else calm and unperturbed, I managed to keep my cool. 

I didn’t have time to debate whether this was reality or a dream, to accept or reject what I was experiencing, because I knew the “tutorial” quest was going to start right away. Deadly Dreams was basically combat after combat, with some spare time for character interactions and a little bit of training, so I had to keep myself together and adapt quickly to my environment if I wanted to survive. If this wasn’t real, it was all good; but otherwise I was fucked if I started zoning out for no good reason.

The glowing lights shut down one by one and I was enclosed by darkness. Only a few glimmering dots stood out, so I was at least assured that this thing was still working and I wouldn’t die in a ditch underground. I felt it moving, kind of like an elevator, but it was taking some time to reach the destination, unlike the game which was immediate. This gave me some time to calm down and process everything.

First of all, I had to recheck my stats and abilities, to make sure the descriptions were the same as in-game and would work as intended.

[Conviction: A measure of how sure the character is about his belief system. Reduced chance of being persuaded by conflicting beliefs or proven wrong by absolute 3% per point. Increased chance of finding a Proof of Faith by 2.5% per point. Passive increase of all skills' effectiveness by 3% per point (cannot be higher than 200%]

After reassuring myself that one stat remained the same, I quickly entered into gamer mode. Conviction was the backbone of every character. If its value reached 3, the character would lose his skills and be more easily affected by negative stats. There were many events in-game that tested one’s conviction, and it was the primary reason why even OP characters could fall easily. With that cornerstone, I carefully observed the rest.

[Concentration: a measure of the intensity of effects a character may bring out to reality through his beliefs. Passive increase of all skills' effectiveness by 7% per point (cannot be higher than 200%). Reduced chance of skill interruption by 9% per point. Bonus increment to skill and ability investments by 6.25% per point after 5 (maximum of 100%)]

Concentration was a tricky stat. Ideally most characters should aim for a fast 21 to max the increment bonus, but game runs often crushed the balls of anyone that tried to rush it. My max level here was 56, but it had been increased: the original max level was 33. I also got bonus stats and allocated points. Normally it would take 8 levels worth of points to achieve 21 Concentration, by that stage the character would be a quarter into the game with no skills or abilities sufficiently leveled, which was a death sentence. All things added, I could get to almost 21 in 6 levels going all out, which was absolutely huge.

But before I could check further into the descriptions, I saw light finally entering my eyes through a slit, two doors sliding in opposite directions to reveal a bleak and compact interior.

Feeling my heart skip a beat, I stepped forward and looked around carefully. There was a muscular adult man with a low fade haircut and a goaty,  wearing a futuristic full body suit, black in color with metal alloy covering the joints and vitals. It was not aesthetically pleasant, with strange bulges on the back and distributed around the front muscles seemingly randomly, but it was the Battle Suit alright.

I finally looked at myself more inquisitively, and although clearly less flashy and colored red, it was definitely a Battle Suit, too. This thing made stats like natural strength and resilience basically useless, and was the very apex that science could build. Aside from that, my body was obviously smaller, which was no surprise: all students ranged between 12 and 17 years old.

Observing the senior once more, I noticed an inconspicuous line of blue text that expanded once I looked more carefully.

[ID: Joseph Sebastian Smith

Level: 15/33

Belief: Only the strong survive (C-) (Vampiric series)

(Concentrate to see more)]

“Huh, a Bloodstone again. Not a lot of you guys left."

I flinched at his tired voice, which felt strange. I was never so sensitive. But I thought it had something to do with the Coward characteristic.

“You don’t need to make such a face. I already read your file, rest assured that we made the best composition possible for this mission”.

His words didn’t relieve me of my anxiety, in fact, knowing his name I even began to panic, because regardless of the variables of each run, the instructor for each tutorial mission had at least one fixed student assigned to him, which would also decide the difficulty of the first quest.

I snapped at the two doors that opened one after the other.

Closest to me, a young guy wearing a similar red suit, but taller by a few inches and even muscular, came out. He had a perfectly combed head of golden hair, a skin with no blemishes and beautiful green eyes, but as soon as he set his eyes on me, his face warped into a disgusted scowl.

“You, huh? If you’re going to scurry away like a rat again, you better do it before we start. You'll be at the fucking front."

I ignored his words and focused only on the blue text.

[ID: Alexander Bloodstone

Level: 0/33

Belief: God is evil (S-) (Experience series)

(Concentrate to see more)]

If a main character of Alexander’s caliber appeared, I already foresaw nothing good. I quickly looked at the guy that appeared on the other side of the room, feeling my headache coming back. I didn’t even need the system to know who he was.

A bald and skinny guy with big lips like a pufferfish and cat-like eyes, the exposed skin of his cheeks was oily and the veins of his eyes looked like they were about to pop. His suit was colored a light brown.

“... What?” he asked, confused.

[ID: Edward Rocksword

Level: 0/33

Belief: Alcohol is the best (A+) (Attraction series)

(Concentrate to see more)]

This dude was one of the strongest companions of the Deadly Dreams universe. Proof was that he could take out a third of Marian's hp on his own while tanking every hit. His only flaw was that without alcoholic drinks, he couldn’t do anything. Not just any would do, either.

Then, my most dreaded nightmare came true as another door opened. A girl of average size with short black hair, black eyes and deadpan face. Everywhere you looked, she had no special features, only that there was no particular flaw either. Her suit was colored a deep blue.

Upon entering, she did a quick look over the room and closed her eyes.

[ID: Amelia Wintersong

Level:0/33

Belief: I build my own reality (SS) (Spiritual series)

(Concentrate to see more)]

... Damn it.

This mission would be the most difficult out of all starters. No one has ever managed Amelia’s starting quest without at least one death in the team. The most common result was Amelia and the player character surviving: not even the instructor could manage.

However, when I thought everyone was here and we would get briefed on the quest, as teams were composed of a maximum of 4 students and one instructor, another door opened.

There came a short girl with severe burns covering half of her skin. She wore a dull grey suit, her hair was a long purple and tucked back in braids, while her eyes seemed completely dead.

[ID: Jessica Silentscar

Level: 0/42

Belief: I know more than everyone (D-) (Vampiric series)

(Concentrate to see more)]

Max level is not 33? But wait... I’ve never seen this character before?