[Late post, not going to say sorry because that's pointless. Instead, we will do better.]

That should stall our progress for a while, at least long enough for morning to come. All it took was a little bit of metal manipulation inside my own body and bam, I was suddenly having a wacky seizure. Although there was no need to escape I still had to find a way to sample a little bit of the people in the valley of shiny lights or whatever it was. On a separate note, since I already turned my buddy into a puppet I might as well test the limits. Before I did anything extreme I took some time to carefully examine all the functions of his body. If only I had my electricity manipulation abilities back, that way I could control all of his nerves. I had to go pay a visit to our neighbors in the Stormy Plains soon. Aw fuck, I had so many things on my to-do list. Fuck it, sleepy time, I’ll figure everything out later.

…

Huh, I wonder if other me falls asleep when I do too.

“I can if I choose to.”

“So you chose to then.”

“It’s much more convenient for our purpose at the moment.”

“Time in here goes very slowly, you think maybe we can speed it up?”

“We can try.”

“If so then let's do it in our respective areas. From what I saw earlier, just a few minutes in the outside world generated a massive amount of that new source of power.”

“There’s going to be a strength imbalance between us. I have less souls.”

“You’ll be fine. The power of good always triumphs.”

“We both know that isn’t true.”

“Whatever, go cheer up or something.”

***

This strange creature was very prone to collapsing. It was a pretty common occurrence for those who had too many conflicting abilities however. If he wasn’t stupid he’d figure it out and stop mixing his blood with other creatures, if he was then so be it. But she was quite sure that those spikes jutting out of his body had an aura originating from this world… How curious. And since when did he suddenly have two extra pairs of arms?

***

“Dude, you think maybe, we can like cultivate or something?”

“What are you on about now?”

“You know, the thing the magic girl taught us?”

“That method is based on the energy released from other people, if you use your brain you might be able to see the flaw in trying to cultivate that in here.”

“What if we are already doing it?”

“No, whatever this stuff is- it’s giving us different powers.”

“Yooo, what if we can train our bodies in here too?”

“That… actually might work.”

…

“It didn’t work.”

“To be fair it does violate the principle of energies.”

“You say that as if we don’t live in fucking fantasy land now.”

“The only option we really have left now is absorbing our respective energies.”

“Fine. Let’s figure out a way to speed up time while we’re at it.”

…

Fuck! We made time too fast!

At least we were able to accelerate time.

Yeah, but now we’ve gotta figure out what powers we gained out in the real world.

The rings on my back are complete now.

Amazing! That really helped us figure out what we can do!

I kind of feel like… I can- consume anything.

That’s our power dumbass.

Just place your hand on our little sidekick.

That’s a little bit sus but ok. I placed my hand on our funny little mascot and waited for results… It didn’t do anything at all.

Yes it did.

No it didn’t.

“What are you doing to me?”

“Me? I was just molesting you, it’s fine though, I don’t like little boys. Anyways, do you feel a little different? Like a part of you is missing?”

The kid felt around his body for a little bit before shaking his head.

I'm sure I took something from him.

Yeah, you took his innocence you bastard.

Give me control for a little bit.

You really think I would let you play with a little boy? I might be more agreeable if it was a-

Stop messing around!

Yes sir!

What was this fool up to now?

“Give me your hand.”

Oh no, the poor kid. From behind my winced eyes I tearfully gazed as we ran my nail across the kids palm. Ritual time?

“Mister?”

The wound suddenly vanished and my own palm was displayed to me, except with a fresh cut on it. As I regained control the wound immediately sealed.

I think I know what I can do now.

So what about me then? If our abilities were opposite then maybe I could take away the good things?

That's redundant, we can already do that anyways.

So… if you take, then maybe I give? What a weird swap. Usually I’m the one taking.

I’m sure you are.

…You got me. Fuc- Nevermind. Let’s get ready for the main event. I think we can put your new ability to good use.

Of course we can, there is no easier way to gain power and influence than being an amazing healer. We already learned this from all those cultivation novels.

So you were watching!

Let’s get back to work.

Knock! Knock! Knock!

Wow, such good timing. I gently opened the door and was immediately met with the challenge of catching a maid before she could collapse to the floor. Was my face that scary? I thought I was pretty sexy to be fair.

You have six arms and the eyes of the devil.

Fuck! You take over.

“Did I scare you? I apologize. It’s merely a consequence of my ability. Do you feel better now?”

Why did I just feel a random ping of fear? And was she blushing? Why did all the girls have to fall for goody two shoes? Life was so unfair… I’ll just go back to my dom- I mean companion.

…

“As you might have been able to tell, I am now awake.”

“You should be more careful with what you mix with your body.”

“Oohh! Are you perhaps… caring for me? Wait! I’ll shut up, don’t seal my lips. Where are we now?”

“Just out of the range of detection of the city.”

“Nice. Can I hold your hand for just a moment? There’s a new cool power I think I have, do you have any like, curses or disabilities or anything?”

“You’d best not be playing tricks again.”

“I’m not. Look! I even have rings on my back now. I’ll  just hold your pinky. Trust me, you’ll thank me later.”

No way- she really gave me her pinky. I wasn’t sure why I couldn’t access my soul abilities anymore but I was sure that it wasn’t because my soul was dead. Which could only mean one thing. It was under some sort of negative effect- and if so then I could transfer it over to someone. If my powers failed then I could always just play it off but if not then… hehe, a weak and defenseless immortal… hehehe.

***

She knew he was up to something again. There was no way he wasn’t. Even a normal person would be able to tell. Unlike a normal person she could afford to take the risk of being tricked by someone of his abilities. Could she though? She hadn’t had much time to consider what he was really doing before she suddenly felt her pinky constricted by a force unlike any other before. She hastily activated all her defensive techniques and abilities but the constricting force continued to slowly slither through her arm and into the rest of her body. This… she couldn’t believe it. To be fooled by a mere ant.

“Holy shit! It really worked! You look so stupid right now!”

***

She fell for it! She fucking fell for it!

“How does it feel dummy? Shameful? Embarrassing? Imagine when your dad finds out you got tricked by a dumb ass like me.”

This was honestly the most emotion I’d ever seen her display. I mean it was easy to tell that she was angry simply from how red her cheeks were. Why were her cheeks so red? Ah! She fucking passed out! With my enhanced senses returned I immediately realized that there was no longer any air exiting or entering her body. Instead of taking the opportunity to perform some mouth to mouth resuscitation I simply pushed air into her lungs using my manipulation abilities. She sprung back to life and I congratulated myself on not turning this story into a shitty harem story.

“So uh… you know, it sucks to be you I guess. We can still go find the beast though if you want.”

“Just… just… kill… kill me.”

“That’s kind of extreme dude. Not like I’m gonna do anything crazy to you. For some reason I can’t feel attracted to you. Maybe I’ve lost the joy for sex. Damn, have I really lost my sex drive? This is bad. Very bad.”

Oh yeah! The boys! I hadn’t seen them in so long!

“Come out guys!”

Thooom!

What the fuck? That noise was irregular even for the boys. My eyes soon recognized that the tree I was staring at was not a tree.  It was one of the boys… Holy fuck! That’s about sixteen? seventeen meters? Would they turn into titans at some point? Was there even a size limit? I mean, it would be kinda crazy to have planet sized creatures at my beck and call. Whatever, let’s focus on the now. I had one of them pick me up before cutting my hand and letting blood drip into its mouth. Oh yeah, the seizures! I forgot! I switched into my beast form and swooped down to grab miss self pity and soared back up again to watch the ensuing chaos. But wait, if they were already animals anyways then would they even gain any abilities?

Oh. Scratch that, the vibrating forest had already given me the answer. A new layer of armor was slowly encasing the boys and removing all traces of biological presence. They kind of looked like robot dinosaurs now… maybe… a large tube slowly started to form on their shoulders and slowly elongated to point ahead of them. After that I directed all of them to point those tubes towards a mountain off in the distance.

Pop!

What the fuck? Instead of the thunderous boom I was expecting, my ears simply popped. Did they implode? I opened my eyes to check- wow, that’s pretty decent. All the trees nearby had been blown away and I could still see a force going outwards swaying all the trees. The mountain off in the distance now had numerous clouds of dust spurting from its body. This was giving me a very good idea. I mean, I still had to figure out what the fire rate was. I turned around, plugged my ears, and closed my eyes then gave the boys the go signal.

My back was assaulted with numerous bouts of sudden pressure and the anticipation to see how much damage had been caused incessantly gnawed at my will. After quite possibly the longest ten seconds of my life I made the boys stop and turned around to look at the mountain. A cloud of dust far larger than the mountain had now formed. Who would’ve thought that even with magic I could still make use of guns. Now that I had regained control of my elemental manipulation abilities I could redirect all the flames produced in our bodies elsewhere. After that, compress it, create a metal shell, and badabang badaboom, artillery cannon. Now I just had to figure out if I could make a railgun and explosive rounds. The problem with explosive rounds was that I lost control of the fire after a certain range and the shells would just explode mid-air. And the problem with the railgun is that I had no idea how a railgun functions.

I need to go back home and get access to the internet. Oh well, time for a comprehensive strength check. As of this moment I can summon… five-hundred and eighty of the boys which means the power counter is roughly at two-hundred and ninety. If my estimations are correct then that means I can summon twenty-nine pairs of clones each with a set of summons. This brings the total number of soldiers I have to sixteen-thousand, eight-hundred, and forty-nine. Not including the little bug boys that can also be summoned. How tall were they now? I had one of the boys blast one out for me to observe. Damn, even they were taller than me in human form now. At around three meters tall they could be estimated to be around a sixth of the height of the boys.

The main problem for me now would be range- the range of which the boys could stray from my side was decent but sooner or later it would start to get crowded. Essentially, I needed to get back to the other side and gain some new abilities. On the bright side I had fifty-eight clones that could go as far away from me as they pleased. I used a little bit of magic to create a very reflective metal mirror and slowly began pulling clones out. Honestly it was kind of a pain in the ass, maybe the clones could do it for me? What? They really can? With the help of my clones all fifty eight of us were quickly brought into reality. As always, it was time to divide and conquer.

“Hey, uhh, I know I just took away all your powers and everything but would you mind giving me the map?”

“...”

She doesn’t look that weak. At least capable enough to make noise.

“Hello?”

Yeah, her eyes were even able to glare directly into mine.

“You know what, I’m feeling generous today. So I’m not going to do anything too crazy. But, if you don’t give me some kind of answer I’m going to send you to meet the tickle monster.”

Hey. Dumbass. Tickling can kill people. More so for someone who is barely able to breathe properly.

Why are you here? Did you already finish up on the other side?

Take a look.

…

Let’s see. What’s going on over here? This body was sitting cross legged in the center of some kind of giant metal platform while people on the outskirts of the platform pricked their fingers and dripped blood into a trough. That blood then ran through a matrix which led directly to my body. We can absorb blood through our skin?

Yes, the same way we can let sweat out we can also take liquid in. Although, this trait may be exclusive only to us.

That’s a lot of people though, how long do you think it’s going to take?

We are moving at a rate of about two hundred people a minute, this kingdom contains nearly three-hundred thousand people. So around a day or so.

So, what if the clones helped?

If you can send exactly nine clones over here to help us then we’ll be done quite soon.

Did you let the king know?

Yes.

And how did you tell him they would arrive?

A secret technique.

In that case let’s make it scenic then shall we? Encase us in a flower petal type mechanism and create reflective surfaces then pull them out. I’ll send some guys back to the other side so you can pull them out.

Sure.

From the other side I directed nine clones to go back inside the mirror world and we pulled them out on our side. After that the flower petals bloomed and the nine clones presented themself to the crowd.

“Wooooh!”

Why were they so happy to see them?

Healer, remember?

Have you been using your powers to heal people?

Make an educated guess.

Do your powers even spread to the clones?

It’s a fucking clone you daft fool. As in exactly the same.

Sorry! My bad for being curious. You continue being grumpy then. I’ll just go play.

Make sure not to tickle her, you’ll regret it if she dies.

Sure.

…

“Can you stop being so stubborn? Just tell me what you want? I want to try negotiating at least once in my life. Or are you just too weak to speak? How about this then?”

I sprayed some sleep gas on her face and transferred us over to the dream realm.

“How about now? Can you speak now?”

“...”

So she was just going to stand there and glare at me?

“How about juice? You want some juice?”

I conjured a table with coconuts and forced her to sit down.

“Are you not comfortable?”

Bam! Magic massage chair. It looked so comfortable that I even made one for myself. Still no response.

“Puppies? Or maybe kittens?”

***

What was this? It was almost an illusion yet just barely real enough to not be fake, simultaneously it wasn’t reality either.

“We can spend all day in here. I have plenty of time.”

“...”

It was too dangerous now. Her life was now in his hands- and that didn’t simply mean that he could kill her if he wished. She was well aware of the thoughts coursing through his mind. At least, she used to be. Why would her own father prevent her from reading his mind?

“Here, say ahh.”

What was this white gloopy material on a stick he was trying to shove into her mouth?

Against her own will her mouth split open and the unknown material penetrated her throat. Her mouth was overwhelmed by a tsunami of sweetness that soon spread a chilling cold throughout the entirety of her mind. Then, the most spine tingling sensation- as it was pulled out of her mouth and pushed back in. Like a saw cutting back and forth through a tree. And when she swallowed… the lubrication of an unnatural sugar coated her throat. This had to be a secret weapon designed to stimulate her desires!

[Writers Note - It’s just fucking ice cream.]