I’ve been working on this story for well over a year, and I felt I had to say something at the end of it all.  I’ve taken some time to get my thoughts together, and all I can say is that I feel very lucky to have been able to write this story down, and for people to read it. 

               The story came about almost by accident.  Some personal drama years ago messed me up to the point that I couldn’t concentrate on even starting a story, much less finishing one.  BattleTech coming back into the public eye was enough to get me thinking.  Seeing so many other independent creators adding their creations to the franchise, especially those who went out of their way to write stories for it, showed me it was possible to add your own little piece to this universe.

               The final push for me, that last little spark that got me started, was finding out what happened to the Black Thorns.  That mercenary unit was my entry point into BattleTech.  The first novel ever I read was Main Event.  So when BattleTech was actually becoming a thing again and I was reminded of the great lore and memories I had tied up with it, I looked up the Thorns to see what had happened to them. 

               I was prepared for bad news – BattleTech is full of dark moments, after all.  But what I saw still broke my heart, to find out the Thorns were written off by accident with a shrug and a smile.  I’m the kind of person that can’t stand to look at something that’s broken, so when I heard about that narrative stumble, I couldn’t help thinking about the story I would’ve wanted to see.  And so I got the first idea of one of the Rose children picking the baton.

               Adding a LAM in made sense as a parallel to Marie’s situation.  I’ve always liked Land-Air ‘Mechs, but the lore seems to outright hate them, telling us time and again that LAMs are gone and they’re not coming back, to the point that factories are destroyed to the last circuit board or nuked into oblivion.  So if the forgotten heir of the erased Black Thorns is going to have a story, she might as well have a ‘Mech everyone else would rather be rid of.  That she would be 19 right around the time LAMs were making a very brief resurgence just seemed too convenient not to run with.

               Marie’s story lived exclusively in my head for months, a sort of headcanon I was substituting in just so the Black Thorns’ story ended with something more than a blank page with the word “oops” written on it.  Still, I couldn’t bring myself to write anything down, because it felt like it just wasn’t ready.  Marie herself is the perfect example of this: in an early concept she was the traditional “girl boss” who found the Phoenix Hawk LAM damaged, fixed it up, fought off an evil MechWarrior who tried to take it from her, and then flew off planet to save herself, before a climactic battle at the end where she strikes down the villain and takes control of a mercenary unit.

               Then I thought about it and said “I don’t like this character.”  But I still liked the basic concept of Jeremiah Rose’s daughter piloting a LAM.  So I re-imagined her, keeping a new maxim in mind: Reject the strong female character, embrace the complex female character.

               I started asking questions, like “how would a 19-year-old with no experience really fit into a military unit?”  “How would this character overcome and defeat a seasoned MechWarrior?”  And “How would this character come to be in control of her own mercenary unit?”  And the more I thought about these questions, I realized the answer was “she couldn’t.”

               So the story became focused on Marie’s journey into adulthood and piloting.  She would have the base skills to pilot a LAM, but that was about it.  And as I plotted out this new story following Marie’s development, I realized that I finally liked this character, and I wanted to see what happened to her.

               I started writing this story down more as a dare to myself to see how far I could get before I lost interest.  I had the first two of chapters in my head.  I was as surprised as anyone when I not only wrote twenty-three more chapters, but still had the energy and the interest to go back and revise the draft.  So I’m hoping this is the story that got me out of my creative rut.

               I posted the story up for fun, just to see what people thought of it.  I found that posting it made it easier to keep working on it – it gave me a schedule and a goal to work towards.  Just as importantly it kept me moving forward, instead of constantly going back to rework earlier chapters.

               I know the story isn’t perfect.  I’ve been keeping notes of things I would change in a future rewrite, whenever that might come along.  But I’m still happy to have been able to write so much, and that so many people have been able to enjoy it.  Recording it as an audiobook made sense to me – a close friend of mine who’s always supported my writing has said he doesn’t have time to read anymore, but he listens to audiobooks all the time.  So I got out my microphone and got to work.  Adding the post-production sound effects and music was just extra fun for me.

               So what’s next?  Well I’ve got several other projects in mind, some BattleTech and some independent.  Like I said, I hope this project got my creativity going again, so we’ll see.  I do have some more of Marie’s story planned out, and I hope to be able to tell it to the rest of you soon.

               I of course have to thank the various artists who contributed along the way.  It’s been great seeing what you guys have come up with!  I originally just wanted a few images spice things up here and there, since I liked that the classic BattleTech novels would have a few pictures included with the text.  I guess you could say I got carried away and got too many images done, but I was having fun seeing the story be brought to life through so many talented people.  Each artist who’s contributed has been an inspiration to me, and their work helped give me the drive to keep working on this story.

               And as my final word on this, I need to say thanks to my audience.  I’ve tried to sign off each chapter with “thanks for listening” or “thanks for reading.”  I strongly believe that when someone reads something you wrote, they’re the ones doing you a favor, not the other way around.  You didn’t have to give me your time to read the story, but you did anyway.  So for that, I say one more time, to those who were with this story since the beginning and those who are just finding it now: thank you.

-Lucen Dacier