“Hey, Sam. Are you going to be here for a little while yet?” June asks. “I wanted to show Lark something outside, but it would be nice if we could leave our stuff here.”

We’re closing up for the night. Sam is sitting at the bar with her laptop doing something with one of her inevitable spreadsheets.

“Sure,” says Sam. “I’ll text you before I leave.”

“Ooh, a text! You must like me!” June says, then adds to me. “Leave the jacket.”

I drop my jacket back on the bar and follow her up the back stairs and out the door into the alley.

“Oh dang, I’ve always wanted to see dumpsters!” I enthuse.

June laughs and sprouts wings. Lately, I’ve been either following June’s example with halter tops or loose racerback tanks. Even if I’m not flying much, under the right circumstances, wings can be nice for cuddling, and Anya also likes having access to my shoulders for kisses, so there’s been some incentive. Today, I’m wearing a racerback tank, so in a moment I have wings too and I follow June into the dark night sky.

It soon becomes obvious that her destination is a local landmark, and we quickly alight on a rooftop high above the streets. Over our heads, a scaffold supports an array of communication dishes and cell phone antennas, which are barely visible in the reddish-orange glow of the city’s most visible nighttime icon. A fifty-foot-tall “1^st” in LED lights that look like neon fades to dark and the identical lights on another side of the triangular structure begin to shine across the city.

I approach the wall surrounding the edge of the rooftop and look down at the river, visible in the city lights twinkling on the waves. I shiver in the cold breeze and June wraps her wings around me, warming me almost instantly.

“I used to come up here to be angsty sometimes,” she says. “I thought it might be nice to come back up again. Also, I wanted to thank you.”

“For what?”

June doesn’t answer right away. Then she says, “I’ve told you how I felt about Anya doing the ritual on me. It was selfish and we had to work through that. Even though we’re good now and I like parts of it, it still sometimes feels like me being a Nephilim is more about being a supporting character in Anya’s story. I didn’t ask for it and maybe it made Anya feel better, but I’m more isolated than I would have been otherwise. I’m so happy for how things worked out for you. You got something that you needed. I didn’t.”

I take a breath to say…something, but June keeps going. “I’m not trying to make you feel bad, just giving some context. When we went out for your first flight the other day, your attitude changed some things for me. Not many people have seen my 'oops, all eyeballs' stage, much less my final form. People get weird about it in a way that they don’t with giant sexy ladies or giant purple kitties.”

“I dunno, I can get kinda weird about giant sexy ladies,” I interrupt.

“Focus, Lark. I mean, even supernatural folks get put off my Escher situation. But you didn’t.”

“I genuinely don’t see how that’s objectively weirder than my griffin thing!” I protest. “My head changes size! I don’t know what’s happening to my brain in there! How is that less upsetting than your brain being in a different dimension? Like, with you transcending Euclidean space, I can at least say, ‘Oh, there’s probably math that I don’t understand that can explain it.’ Shapeshifting makes no fucking sense and the only reason I’m not extremely pissed off about it is that I have boobs now.”

“Then we can all be grateful for your boobs saving us from your wrath. I guess when you put it that way, I sound almost normal.”

I shrug. “What’s normal? I guess for someone like Anya who grew up with a demon mom, it’s all she’s ever known. Obviously I don’t have the same experience as you, but I think I understand what you mean about being isolated. The upside of having already isolated myself is that I don’t have too many people I have to worry about whether I should tell them anything. At this point, it’s really just Kelly, Michelle, and Lily who I probably want to tell, and if one of them knows, they should all know.”

“I don’t think Kelly will be a problem,” June says with an odd tone in her voice. “Anyway, besides that you didn’t seem to think of me any differently, you were just so excited about the possibilities of powers that I’ve barely explored. It’s given me a lot to think about and I think my attitude about things is changing. So thanks.”

June leans her head on my upper arm and we watch the river go by in silence. Then my phone dings.

“That’s probably Anya checking in,” I say as I pull my phone from my pocket.

“Tell her I kidnapped you for nefarious purposes.”

I look at my phone. The text isn’t from Anya. It’s from Jake.

I owe you an apology

Can we talk? There’s some things I need to tell you

I silently pass the phone to June.

“Is that good?” she asks tentatively.

I shake my head. “I’ve got a bad feeling about it.”

*****

“I’ve got a bad feeling about this,” Anya says. “When you came out, it wasn’t like Jacob was just surprised and reacted badly. That was hate.”

“I know,” I say quietly.

“Oh, babe, I know you know.” Anya wraps her arms around me. “I just wanna keep you safe so I’m stressing at you. Kind of counterproductive and I’m sorry.”

“I’ll forgive you if you kiss me.”

Anya obliges while Dave and June make exaggerated gagging sounds. June called an emergency meeting before she brought me home. I texted my mom to see if she knows anything, but it’s late and I don’t think I’ll hear back from her until morning.

“Just block him and move on,” says Dave. “He’s an asshole and you don’t owe him attention or forgiveness.”

“I’d like to,” I admit, “but now I’m super worried that he’s found out something about our little family secret. I hope Mom didn’t accidentally let something slip. I really don’t know how much they’ve seen each other lately.”

“Is that really your responsibility, though?” Dave asks.

I shrug and look at Anya. “Maybe? Even if it’s not, it could still cause problems that I’d prefer to avoid.”

“It would be better to know,” Anya confirms. “It’s not like if Lark doesn’t take care of the problem that she’s failed our whole community and will be shunned, but we do try to clean up our own messes. Also, if there is a problem, you don’t have to take care of it all by yourself. You’ve met Ben; there’s enough of my family around that you’ve got backup. There are also other resources in the supernatural community, but we don’t know yet if there’s any reason to involve them.”

“So, find out what he wants, then?” I say tentatively.

“Ultimately, it’s your call,” Anya replies, “but yeah.”

I pull out my phone.

Hey, just got home from work. What did you want to tell me?

And yes, you do owe me an apology

I assume that Jake is still awake gaming, because the reply comes quickly.

Can’t talk about this over text. We need to meet in person

Alone

I relay this to the group.

“Obviously, that’s stupid,” Anya says bluntly. “But go ahead and agree. Arrange to meet someplace public and Remy will just happen to be there too. I’ll see if I can scare up some backup.”

“I’d go, but I’ve met Jake, so he’d recognize me,” Dave says. “Who’s Remy?”

Anya shifts for Dave’s benefit. His eyes widen and he says, “Whoa! Rad.”

“Should I go?” June asks.

“Probably not,” I say after thinking for a moment. “I don’t want to count on Jake not having looked at social media and made a connection.” Neither Anya or June are particularly active, but I know they both have profiles in a few places.

I arrange to meet Jake at the downtown library tomorrow before I go teach. Anya steps out of the room to make a phone call.

*****

My stomach is doing weird things as I walk up to the library, but I feel surprisingly calm despite that. I guess the fact that I have people I can count on is really sinking in. Anya is already at the library with backup and texted me when Jake arrived. I’m purposefully showing up a little late because Anya didn’t want the possibility of me running into Jake on the way in if she couldn’t have eyes on me.

I call Anya’s phone and wait for the call to connect, then I drop my phone in my jacket pocket, adjust my bass bag on my back, and enter the building, walking through hallways of polished stone to where I agreed to meet Jake. He’s sitting in one of the chairs by a window. I look around the room and spot Anya-as-Remy in another chair, wearing Bluetooth headphones and apparently engrossed in a book, while a man who might be Ben is perusing the stacks with his back to me. There are a few other people quietly doing library things, but I’m not sure if any of them are Anya’s backup as I left those details to her.

As I walk over to where Jake is sitting, I try to concentrate on what emotions I can feel from him. I’m still getting a handle on this power and it’s more than a little unpredictable. At first I have a hard time making anything out, but as I get closer, I begin to feel Jake in my head a little bit.

I put my gig bag down and settle into the chair facing Jake, smoothing my skirt as I do. I don’t really want to make things any easier for him, so I wait for him to speak first. I can see the gears turning in his head and literally feel his conflicted emotions, but I have no idea what’s going to come out of his mouth. Honestly, I’m kind of impressed, because it’s rare for him to think this long before saying something.

“I’m sorry for the things I said the other day,” he begins. “I wouldn’t have said them if I’d known you were under demonic influence.”

I didn’t know what to expect, but it wasn’t that. “What?” I finally say.

“I know this sounds crazy, but I don’t think your ‘girlfriend’ is human. And I think she did something to you.”

“You’re right, that does sound pretty unbelievable,” I respond levelly. “I was hoping for a real apology, not nonsense.” I begin to stand up. I desperately want to know what Jake knows, or thinks he knows, but I can’t afford to let him think that his accusation is anything but preposterous.

“No, wait!” he says. “Let me show you something first!” He pulls out his phone and keeps talking. “I knew something was wrong after I left Mom and Dad’s house, because for a little while I was actually scared of your girlfriend. She’s pretty tall, but I could totally take her—I have the biological advantage and can bench my own body weight.”

I bite my tongue to keep from saying that would be more impressive if he weren’t a string bean and instead briefly entertain the image of Anya kicking his ass just a little.

“Anyway, she’s obviously a huge lesbo and there’s no way she’d want to be with a guy like you unless something else is going on, so I started digging around online. She keeps her socials locked down pretty tight, but I got in touch with someone who sounded pretty crazy at first, but look at these pictures!” He hands me his phone with an email on the screen. As I take the phone, I imagine Anya wiping the floor with him.

I scroll the email. The text claims that Anya is a “known immortal” with the proof being a picture of Anya and June laughing together on their front porch next to another picture of a young woman who bears some resemblance to Anya on the same porch. The second picture appears to be a scan of an older photograph. It’s in color, but faded, and I’d guess from the 60’s or 70’s based on the style of the woman’s dress.

“My guy says she’s probably a succubus. That’s a sex demon,” Jake says. “It turns out that a lot of transgenders are probably influenced by succubuses.” In my head, Anya tosses him through the window.

I pass the phone back to Jake. “Dude,” I say. “I don’t know how to break it to you, but sometimes kids look like their parents. I think that’s Anya’s mom in the second picture.” I don’t actually know if that’s true, but it seems plausible, both in reality and in the slightly edited version of reality that I’d like to sell to Jake.

“No! That’s not all. Look!” He taps at his phone and gives it to me again. This time, there’s a blurry picture of someone who might be Anya sporting horns and a tail. It looks to me like it might legitimately be a picture of her in semi-demonic form, but I keep my face neutral and my voice light as I respond.

“I don’t know what you think this proves? It’s a shitty picture with a filter or somebody photoshopped it or something. People can do stuff like that; it’s not even hard.”

“I know it’s not hard proof, but don’t you see? You were normal until this bitch showed up and then all of a sudden you think you’re a woman and doing…that to yourself.” I can see and feel his disgust. The weird thing is that I can also feel that he’s sincere about everything else. Somehow, his bizarre, bigoted assumptions have led him to something approximating the truth about Anya.

I’m concerned, but also don’t feel like there’s much to be gained from continuing the conversation. I resist the urge to fling his phone across the room and instead return it to him. I stand up for real this time.

“You’ve insulted my girlfriend and me an impressive amount in a short period of time,” I begin. “I was trans long before I met her; I was just good at hiding it. I guess maybe you couldn’t deal with being related to a queer, so you made up an unbelievable story. You’re an asshole and I hope I never see you again. Now do me a favor and get the fuck out of my life.”

Jake jerks back like he’s been slapped and I can feel surprise radiating off him. Did he really think that I'd be convinced by his story? Or did he just not think I had a spine? He stands up, fists clenched at his side, and stares at me. Then he wheels and stomps out of the room. A few patrons watch him curiously as he leaves.

I take a deep breath, shoulder my gig bag, and slowly walk over to the shelves. The man I spotted earlier half turns toward me and I can see that it really is Ben. He gives me a wink but otherwise ignores me. A minute later, Anya joins me.

“That was interesting,” she says quietly in Remy’s baritone. “I’ll meet you outside and we can talk more.” She selects a book from the shelf and leaves. I’m honestly not sure the cloak-and-dagger business needs to continue, but Anya seems to enjoy it, so I wait another minute and then follower her out.

As I walk down the hallway, it feels like a weight or pressure that I wasn’t aware of lifts from my mind. I can feel the emotions of people around me more easily. I stop, then slowly retrace my steps. As I return, I can feel the weight settling back. I think I’m starting to understand why I couldn’t get a read on Jake’s emotions at first. It’s like something was drowning them out, and I think the something is another person, because as I walk back and forth in the hallway, I begin to make out emotions. It feels like confidence, a little curiosity, and an overwhelming sense of superiority. Somehow this person takes up psychic space in a way that’s orders of magnitude bigger than most people and I think that means they're not human.

I turn to return to the room and almost run into Ben.

“Everything all right?” he asks.

“I don’t know,” I say quietly. “Did you get any weird vibes off anybody in there? I’m feeling something weird and I think maybe there’s another supernatural somebody in there.”

“I didn’t notice anything, but I’m not very good with ‘vibes.’ Maybe you should take a turn around the room and I’ll keep an eye on you.”

I take Ben’s suggestion and walk through the stacks, like I’m scanning the call numbers for something in particular. There’s a man sitting in a chair tucked away in corner who I didn’t notice before. As I get closer to him, the weight in my mind increases until it’s almost unbearable. I glance his direction and I’m sure I’ve found my mark. He looks distinctly unremarkable.

He seems to notice me looking at him, and raises grey eyes from a book to meet my gaze, giving me a tight smile. I turn back to the books and randomly pull a couple out, then turn around to the opposite shelf, casually glancing at the man. He seems to be engrossed in his book and ignores me. He appears middle-aged with pale skin and greying hair. If someone told me he was an accountant, I would believe it.

I grab one more book and leave, dropping my little stack of books on a shelving cart on my way out.

Brynstar7

A wild chapter appears! Once again, I didn't mean for that to be a long break. Some stuff happened that made it hard for me to work on one of the major emotional threads of the story (I'm fine, don't worry!) and then life and ADHD did their thing. But I missed the little gay people in my head, so I'm back and really trying to carve out time to put in serious work on this again. Thanks for your patience!