Resurrection Log: Ź̷̼͖ý̶̧̡̩̫͉͔͇̓̈́̋̎̽̌͐͛̈́̎̒́̐̍͠r̴̢͓̖̲͙̲̮͋̉̓̾͒̑͜͠ͅa̵̡̨̦͍͉̳͎͕̞͔̲̺̰̩̩̽͑̆̈̌́̏͝g̵̼͈̟̗͔͋́̈́̀͆̀̚ą̸̯̽̈́̑͒͑́ṙ̷͙̝̥͔̳̜̗͖̦͉͓͕͗̈́̇̇͂̐̍̒̍̔d̸͇̞̥͓̠̈́͒͋̌̐͝ ̶̨̧̛͔̲̻̖͚̠̣͔̻̰̫̒̇͐͜͠T̴̠͓͔̦̩̻̼̖̽͆̍͆̓̊̽̔̚͠ơ̷̶̵̸̸̸̡̛̛̬̖̰̦̦̮͚̗̞̻̻̞̻̙̘̘͈͈̭̲͙̪͍̭̭͉͚̤̅̾̽͋̀̑̋̆̍̉̇̉̈́̿͋͒̇̊̓̂̿̿̑̈́͆͑͌̂̌̑̆̉͘̚͜͜͝͝͝͝͠ţ̷̢̢̛͙̩͎̥͈̝̖̈̄͛̄͊̆̓̈́̊ͅͅȩ̸̠͍̱̖̺̣̖̄̉̔͜ņ̷̡͓̘̥̠̖̝̺͈̥͔̲͊k̴̛̯̫̪͑̽̔́̅͂̿̂͋̉̂̕͘͠y̵̟̟̰̪̻̼̖̌̽̇̓́̍̃͒̾̕̚͝͠r̵̢̨̠͉̼̲̲͛͒̂̽̄͐͌̏͘͘͝a̴̛̰̙̫͂͐̓̐ḿ̷̡̛̤͙͕̼̱̻͙̔͌̓̈̏͑̔̈́̓͘̚ą̸̧̧̯̺̫͈̞͎̻̤̫̂͐̐͘ņ̷̨̱̖̟͖͚̣̂͌͗̌̾̔́̕ ̶̨̨̲̘̭͚̣̝̞̲͔̦̽̾̏̄̒́̚͝K̷̖̻̘̣͐̽̀̅͛͜͜͜ṟ̴̛͇̺͈̲͉̤̰̰̥͉͓̜͑̈́͌̔̍̓́̕ą̷̼̄̾͊̓̽̾͊̈̒̍̍́̉̚͝l̸̨̞͇͈̖͔̘̜̱̦͈̊

Year 76,589 of the —Mother of Ruin—

M:6 D:15

Day 971 of Cycle 3

[transcribed memory/thoughtstream generated by Ṁ̵̢̘̭̬̙̘̦̳͓̺͈̪̒̂ǫ̵̨̛̠̫̻̐̋̓͗͗͗̏̎͂̿͌̕t̴̜̪͇͕͚́̓͐h̴̯͍̼̦̯̝̜̝̤͂͋͆͌͗͝ę̸͉͖͕̜̤̘͙͎͚̈́̏͒̒̄̏̃̋͘̕͘͜ȓ̸̢̨͍͉̱̮̞͔̋̇ ̴̡̛̱̳̘̠͎̫̩̪̦̠̦̣̀͒͛͊̚͠G̷̰̹̝͆̈͜į̸̧̟͙̰͖̳̯̈́̒͜͜g̶͉̗̹̻̟̰̞̭̠͉͙̈́͊̌̈̈̓̐̒̕ạ̵̧̧̘͖͔̟̝̳̅̇̂̂̅̓̇͛̓͋̊̏̇̕t̵̮̉͒̋̄̑̇̌̀̅͑̋͋r̶̻̟͗̋̀̆̿̃̔̄͒̎̊̈́̚o̵̪̦͇̫̾̋̊̾̋͗͗̊͊̄͜͠͝ḡ̵̛̰͎̇̐͒͋̊̀͝ẗ̶̡̮̠͈̗̗̃͛̈̊̾ḩ̴͍̖͖̥͈̻̪̖̤̰̥̣̋͌̚ř̵̝̤̩͈͎̤͎̯̤͔̝̬̖̓̏͐̀̿̊̂̈͋̕͝͝ĭ̴̡̡͙̺̪͕̻̺̥̫̭̜̺̳̃̂͊̓́̅̈́̎̀̽̀̚ͅṃ̵̨͇̺̪̤̄͜ȧ̵͓̟͖̞̩̤͙̩̖̠̝̣̔ź̶̡͇͍̝̳͚̱͖̳͖̬͓̋̂͜ ̸̢̺͚̍̎̈́̂͛̂̐͐̊̕̚͜͝͝Ȉ̵̢̹̜̞͆̃͗̅̈́̋͒̅͝Í̶̡͓͓̰̥̤̗̱̀͛́͆̒͋̂͠͝I̴̟̞̪̯͍̟̿̂̐̌͑̎̅̋͐͆̍́] [cont’d]

 

“I cannot break the commandments of the Mothers, nor the laws of our alliance.”

The look on Rin’s face pained me, but I could not lie to her in this any more than I could risk invoking the rage of a Mother.

“There are things we can offer you,” she went on after a moment, voice hushed.

“It does not matter.”

“We know how much your kind values hybrid offspring. New additions to your species-cluster. And we also know that you’re forbidden from creating them without the cooperation of the other species in question.”

My mind flooded with images, longings…I walled them off. It was insane. Begging me to break a law by leveraging it against my unwillingness to break another. Something only even the most desperate of humans would try. I could not allow my own pieces of humanity to weaken me against such foolishness.

“Stop.”

“You know us. Our species is rife with monsterfuckers. The list of volunteers is large and growing, and I—”

“I said stop!” without truly meaning to, I shouted the words. My tentacles came forward somewhat in my defensiveness, twitching at the tips. Rin’s eyes went wide, and she cringed back.

“No matter what you offer, I cannot do what you are asking of me,” I said.

A look passed amongst the humans in the room. Shosho seemed to be watching the lumi-wall again, but Tursa was staring directly at me, her whiskers and tiny ears flattened to the back of her head.

“Just…just stay here with us for a while, then. That’s all we ask. We’ll have to go back into orbit soon anyway. Just stay with us until then. Maybe…who knows. Maybe somehow we’ll think of a way you can help, without actually breaking any laws. Hell, if we can just learn the source of the damned Warp, at least, we might be able to devise something with our own technology. And you’re a master observer.”

I huffed through the nostrils I had given myself for just such an occasion.

“You don’t really believe that,” I surmised. “You are simply hoping that my time here will change my mind.”

She shrugged.

“Will you stay?”

“I have no reason to go, and no fear of your ever changing my mind. So yes, I will stay so long as the crew does.”

“Thank you,” she said, rather more solemnly than I had ever heard her say anything else.

The colors behind her turned from the grays and oranges of smoke and fire to beiges and other creamy neutral tones, accented by the occasional pop of color. A shrill argument underscored by overly-dramatic music issued from the speaker slats. Everyone turned.

Shosho had put on Real Domicile-Mates.

“There’s no way we’re getting any sleep tonight,” she said, scrunching and then stretching her neck—her own version of a shrug. She had no forelimbs, and therefore, no shoulders. “So let’s get drunk and watch trash instead. And you can all scheme as much as you like. I’ve seen this season before.”

“Screw it,” said Indri. “I’m in. Let me just put the kids to bed. I’ll be right back.”

Grayman shot up to help, scooping the other baby from Marah’s arms. As he squirmed in his father’s grip, I saw that there was a tiny set of wings growing from his back. Rather like what one might get if one crossed those of an earthen bat and some manner of beetle. Judging by the ease with which the adults hefted him about, he was lighter than he looked. Extending my perceptions, I confirmed my theory. His bones were porous.

Before long we were all—save Lore—gathered together in the upstairs living room again, but this time with many, many inebriating beverages.

“They can’t fucking do this to us,” said Rin, rather reminding me of Jack C as she paced the length of her chamber, the skin of her face beginning to turn red again. “This is fucking bullshit.”

“My seviis, calm yourself,” purred Tursa, already quite drunk. Her kind are what the humans call lightweights. “Look at the squelchlings. They are so small.”

“Fuck the damn squelchlings!”

Tursa and Shosho both gasped.

“Is the imprisonment of my species a joke to you, my seviis?”

“Of course not,” there was the edge of a growl to the huntress’s tone, then. “What are you—“

“Forget it,” sighed Rin, stopping in her tracks and massaging her forehead with one hand, dragging it down over her eyes and mouth. “I’m just absolutely freaking out. I’m gonna…I’m gonna go outside. I need to smoke a reeeeaaaaal fat one.”

Curious what it meant to smoke a real fat one and desiring proximity to Rin, I followed her out onto the balcony. It overlooked the sea. A moment later, Shosho stepped out as well. The space was crowded with plants in mismatched pots and furniture in varying states of disintegration. Rain still swept from the sky, catching and dripping at the edges of the balcony rooftop’s overhang. Two of the planet’s three moons hung heavy and bright overhead, shining through the cloud-cover, their broken pinkish light catching on the water’s surface.

It smelled strongly of ozone, rain-wet stone, blooming plantlife, and sea salts. That, and the dried herb which Rin was currently busied with. When she had wrapped some of the stuff up in a small piece of paper, she lit its end and put it to her mouth, inhaled slowly. Her eyes closed.

“What sort of intoxicant or medicine is this?” I inquired.

“It’s weed,” replied Rin, exhaling a cloud of bittersweet smoke and looking over at me. “Want to try some?”

“Certainly,” I replied at once. I had heard of weed.

I took it in my hand, rather than my tentacle, and held it to my mouth. The large teeth made the action rather difficult, but I managed to inhale a….lung-full…of the stuff.

“Now hold it in for a second,” said Rin.

I did. Until I couldn’t any more. I began to cough, and smoke spilled out of me. Rin laughed and patted my cloaked back, over the tentacles. I suppressed a shiver of delight at the sensation even as the hacking wracked my body. And then, finally, it was done.

Shosho took the weed next, grasping it in a tongue-tentacle and holding it to her beak. She did not cough at all.

“Can I ask you something, Zyr?” inquired Rin, after taking the next inhale and passing the drugs to me.

“Yes,” I told her. “Although I cannot promise I will answer.”

She wet her lips again, like she had before she asked me for a favor.

“If it weren’t for the laws, would you help us?”

I considered her for a moment, my eyes meeting hers.

“Yes,” I informed her, truthfully. “It would be a fascinating endeavor.”

She smiled, but it seemed sad, somehow.

“I am glad you are intelligent enough not to attempt to force the task upon me by threat,” I added. “I would be loathe to carry out the actions which that situation would require of me.”

“I…would hope you’d be,” said Rin, shifting her feet about beneath her as she leant against the balcony.

I took another hit. Coughed a great deal more and surrendered the weed to Shosho.

The cycle of drug-passing continued until the fat one burned down to a useless stump. Shosho turned the conversation toward other things. Real Domicile-Mates, mostly. I believe this was an attempt to distract Rin from her humans troubles.

The world was becoming…fuzzy. And yet amplified. My mind felt different in ways I cannot entirely define and could not, at the time, fathom. My awareness seemed to contract and expand all at once. The balcony and what I could see from the balcony became my whole world, and everything that was in my world was the most interesting thing in the universe. What’s more, I was experiencing a sudden and rather intense desire for pleasure of a tactile nature.

“I wish to stroke your feathers with my hands and tentacles,” I informed Shosho. “May I?”

She seemed to consider for a moment.

“Yes,” she said. “But don’t tug on them.”

I began to run my fingers and tentacle-tips through Shosho’s plumage, finding that they were every bit as soft as they appeared. The gla’cui made a sort of cooing sound.

Rin sighed.

“I think it’s been long enough that I can check on Lore without miss I-know-how-to-parent-better-than-you telling me off,” she said. “See ya inside.”

Shosho followed shortly after, taking the sensory delight of her feathers along with her. But I remained on the balcony, my attention turning instead to the view of the sea and shoreline. The lights of seafarers were visible out at the edge of the horizon. To the south, more multicolored lights condensed in the cup of a gradual curve of the land. A seaport.

To the north, the shoreline extended outward into a narrow, many-peaked peninsula, glittering all over with the illuminated windows of residential structures. The wind blew hard off the sea, the scents of salt and aquatic vegetation intensifying.

I could have stood there for a very long time, doing nothing but perceiving my surroundings. But eventually activity from inside the house drew my attention.

“She’s gone!”

Rin’s voice as she declared this was high and loud, her scent soured in panic.

Yanking the door open with a tentacle, I rushed inside.

“What?” Tursa was out of her seat so fast that even I barely registered the movement. “Lore? No. She’s just up on the—”

“Roof?” Rin’s voice broke into a laugh that was even stranger than usual. I had not known before that one could laugh in despair, in fear. “She’s not up there. Not down near the water. She’s not anywhere in range. House drones aren’t showing her signature. I looked anyway. She’s not here.”

Chaos ensued.