“I’m a failure as a husband and as a father,” Dad said as he sat on the couch, staring blankly into space and idly scratching Fenrir behind his ears.

I sighed.  “You’re not a failure as a father,” I said, “and as a husband, frankly, you were set up to fail.”

My words seemed to snap Dad back to reality as he turned to look at me.  “What do you mean?”

I placed my right hand on his shoulder.  “Mom is not the easiest person to get along with.  She’s never been entirely stable, always treating people like props meant to decorate her personal dollhouse.  She didn’t want either of us to have our own lives.”

Cat wrapped a sympathetic arm around my shoulders, but remained silent.

“You don’t really think that?” said Dad.  “Liz has always been so kind. The only times we ever fought was when I messed up.”

I did my best to bite back the angry words that came to my mind.  Dad needed my support now, and as much as I hated my mother for what she had done to him, I’d have to be careful not to push him too hard or he’d run right back to Mom and sell himself as her slave.

“Dad, do you really think that Mom is as perfect as that?  That she never makes mistakes?”

Dad shook his head like he was trying to puzzle through a particularly challenging problem.  “Well, obviously nobody is perfect,” he said. “But I’m such a flawed man. Liz was the first person who ever really saw anything good in me.  I’m nothing without her.”

Oh, Dad.  Cat and I shared a concerned look.  We both knew exactly what that sounded like.  Treat someone like they are worthless their whole lives, and the first person that acts kind of nice to them looks like a genuine saint.

Helping Dad sort out his feelings, though, would have to wait.  I had an appointment in Asgard. My life sure seems like a mess these days, juggling trying to save the universe with my own personal life.  I dread to think what would happen if I dropped a ball.

“Dad,” I said.  “We’ve gotta go.  Are you going to be alright here with Fenrir?  I’m sure Billie will also be around if you need him.”

Dad gave me a pained smile.  “Oh, I think I’ll be okay. I’m just not sure what to do.”

I turned to Fenrir.  “Fenrir… can I have a word with you in private?”

Fenrir said nothing, but followed me into the front room anyway.

I fixed Fenrir with a serious look.  “I know you barely know him, but can you keep an eye on Dad while we’re gone?  I’m worried about him. He’s hardly been away from Mom my entire life. I’m afraid he might do something to hurt himself.

Fenrir nodded.  “I understand. I will make sure nothing happens to him.  I’d say I’d treat him as my own father, but we both know how that’s turned out.”  I know there’s the old joke about wolves and sheep, but the look on Fenrir’s face was decidedly sheepish for a wolf.

“Good boy,” I said, scratching him behind the ears.  He gave me a look that somehow managed to say both “yes, I love this” and “you are dead to me” at the same time.

****

The moment of truth had come.  It was time to go to Asgard. Cat and I both had backpacks loaded with our supplies.  Astveig and Arey just had satchels with shoulder straps. The sun was bright in our backyard as Billie clapped his hands together.

“Everyone ready?”  Billie beamed his trademarked charming smile.

The four of us girls, of which I now counted myself one, all grunted various levels of agreement, ranging from Cat’s “Hell yeah” to Astveig’s “Let’s just get this over with.”

Billie opened the portal, and through the rift I could see what looked like a street paved in gold and buildings made of crystal.  After stepping through the portal, the brief glimpse I got through the portal proved not nearly enough to prepare me for the beauty I witnessed on the other side.  Towers made of frosted crystal trimmed with gold reached into a sky lit by a golden sun that looked anything but natural. The sun itself had been forged in the shape of a smiling face.  I could tell because I could look right at it without getting blinded, even though it did seem to emit light.

Billie noticed me looking at the sun.  “You like that? I made it,” he said with a wink.  I mean, I knew he was the God of Metal, but that goes beyond anything I could have imagined.

“Alright, enough bragging,” Astveig cut in.  “Just lead us to the Great Hall.”

As we walked down the streets, there were people who carried on their days, doing business, hawking wares.  Several turned to look at us, curious about the new arrivals.

“It’s not that we don’t get many visitors in Asgard,” Billie said with a hush, trying not to let too many eavesdroppers hear.  “We get plenty of travelers. Just not many from Jötunheim or Midgard. Especially not Midgard. The humans have proven to be difficult to deal with.  They can be extremely paranoid of even their own people, let alone gods.”

An old beggar in a wide-brimmed hat knelt by the side of the street.  “Alms for a poor beggar?” he asked.

Billie smiled.  “Oh, hey, Odin, we were just looking for you.”

The beggar shook his head.  “Odin? I believe you have mistaken me for…”  He trailed off, realizing none of us were buying it.  He snapped his fingers in frustration, and immediately took on a form more closely resembling the brown-bearded form I’d first met him in, though this time wearing a peaked helmet and an eyepatch.  “Damn. How did you know?”

All five of us spoke up simultaneously.  “The hat.”

Odin shrugged sheepishly before beckoning for us to follow him.  Odin led us through a maze of back allies before approaching what looked like the back door to a building.  Ushering us through, we found ourselves in a grand throne room, flanked on both sides by gold-clad guards armed with shields and spears.  The throne itself looked to be made of glass with gold threaded through it. I’m guessing Odin is accustomed to bringing visitors in through the back entrance, because the guards didn’t even so much as blink as he took his seat on the throne and a spear materialized in a flash of light in his left hand.  He tapped the base of the spear on the floor twice.

“So, what brings you to my glorious palace?”  Wow, full of yourself much there, Allfather?

Billie immediately switched to a more diplomatic demeanor that made his black, studded leather aesthetic seem all the more out of place.

“Allfather, my friends wish to reach the realm of Hel, but have no means of entry.  We have come to seek your guidance.”

Odin seemed thoughtful for a moment.  “Well, I suppose I could lead you on the path.  It’s the least I could do for the vanquisher of the Godwolf.”  Odin beamed at me. I did my best not to let loose an awkward laugh, but my eyes shifted from side to side like I was watching a game of ping-pong.  Thankfully, Odin seemed not to notice, or, if he did, he chose to ignore it. “But, tell me, why would you seek to enter the Realm of the Unworthy Dead?”

Astveig spoke next, doing her best to keep her disdain for the Allfather hidden.  “We believe that Hel may be able to override Crys’s betrothal to Loki.”

“Truly?”  Odin scratched his beard in thought.  “That would definitely prove to foil Loki’s plans.  The Goddess of the Dead would also very likely wish to punish her father for what he did to her.”  Odin grinned a wicked smile. “Yes, I think I like this idea.”

“So you’ll do it?” asked Billie.

“Of course I’ll do it!  I see no incentive NOT to.”  Odin leapt out of his throne.  “Come with me if you want to die,” he added, doing his best Arnold Schwarzenegger impression.  Which, by the way, wasn’t good.

Odin led us out through the main entrance.  Now that we were out in the open with the Allfather, onlookers from the busy streets took note of us.  None approached, but I could see several stop and stare, supposedly wondering who it was that Odin was showing around personally.  I also realized there was a small contingent of the gold-plated guard following us.

Finally, we arrived at a great stable, filled from end to end with dozens of horses, each seeming unnatural in its own way.  Some had a metallic sheen to their hair, others had antlers or horns. One was definitely a unicorn. Odin stopped beside a massive horse that was dark blue in color and had eight legs.

Odin patted the eight legged horse and stroked its mane.  “This here is my personal steed, Sleipnir. He is the mightiest horse in all the realms, and he will take us all to Hel’s realm.  Incidentally, Loki is also his mother.”

I’m positive that, if my jaw weren’t attached, it would have been bouncing on the floor.  “Loki is his m-mother?”

“Mhm.  I’ll spare you the details.  It’s a long story. Don’t worry, though.  Sleipnir is quite harmless. Well, as harmless as any horse, at least.”  Odin opened the gate, and our party parted to let Sleipnir through. Odin grasped Sleipnir’s bridle and led him out the back of the stable, where we found a sizable cart waiting for us.  The cart was made of the same material most of the buildings here were made of: some type of crystal with a circuit-like trim of gold.

“Everyone hop into the cart,” prompted Odin.  “I’ll drive.”

Arey, Cat, Astveig and I all shared an awkward glance.  None of us knew what to expect from this cart. What kind of trip was this going to be?  By the end of it, were we going to be waking up to find ourselves shackled with Odin saying “Hey, you’re finally awake?”  Despite our misgivings, however, we hopped into the cart one by one.

“Does this thing have seatbelts?” I asked sarcastically.

Odin shook his head.  “I’m afraid not. You’ll just have to hold on tight.  I’ll have to consider seatbelts for a future upgrade.”

Before I could explain my joke to him, Odin ushered Sleipnir onward, and I realized just how wrong I’d been.  We were zipping down the road so fast that I couldn’t even get a good view of what we were passing, and there was no sign of slowing down.  Our surroundings blurred, then solidified into flowing colors, and finally transformed into something akin to the hyperspace effect from Star Wars.  It was hard to see my comrades seated next to me while trying to hold on for dear life, but Cat held her eyes closed in an effort to protect them, while Arey and Astveig looked something like they were getting a faceful from an industrial fan.  I imagine my own face looked something like that as well.

After what must have been only a few seconds but felt like an eternity, we came to an abrupt stop.  I immediately hopped over the side of the cart and hurled into the ground before even realizing what the ground was.  It was raw, red sandstone but, more notably, only a few feet away, all the stone turned a dark bluish color in a perfectly straight line stretching from horizon to horizon.  It was like looking at the border between worlds, which, I suppose, is what it was.

“Welcome to the border between life and death!” announced Odin.

Cat coughed, trying to hold her lunch in.  Arey and Astveig both held onto the side of the cart to steady themselves.  Only Odin and Billie had seemed unaffected by the ride on the Space Cart to Hel.

“I’ll give you all a few minutes to reorient yourselves,” said Odin.  “I’m not leaving until you’re all safely across the border.”

After taking a few minutes to let my gorge settle, all four of us lined up at the border, looking out across the dark landscape before us.

“Moment of truth,” said Cat.  “I guess now we find out whether you’re going to die one day or not.”

“Yep,” I replied.  “No pressure or anything.”

Taking a deep breath, I stepped across the line.  The warm air suddenly turned to chill, and I waited a moment to see what would happen.  Nothing. I was not dying.

Honestly, I don’t know which result I had actually hoped for.  If I had started to die, then that would mean I was effectively immortal, but that I could not go on this journey with my friends.  And that is truly what they were: my friends. I had never trusted anyone more than these people beside me. Even Billie. Okay, maybe not Odin, but the rest were people I was willing to die for, and that realization shocked me.

But, to know that one day I will die and come to this barren afterlife, even if that day may be a long way off, was still something  that would scare me. So rarely is anyone presented with their own mortality without actually being in danger of dying. This was the most terrifying thing I’d seen in months, and I was only recently allowing myself to experience emotions again.  If courage is standing strong in the face of fear, then this is the first truly courageous thing I’ve ever done. Facing Fenrir alone had felt more like an act of self-harm than of courage.

Before I’d even realized it, several moments had passed, and Cat and Astveig were already standing beside me, waiting for Arey to cross the line.  Arey took that step… and immediately, something was wrong. She gasped for air and collapsed. I managed to catch her before she hit the ground, and I dragged her back across the border, where she finally drew in a deep breath.  I did, too, having not even realized I was holding my breath.

“What… happened,” rasped Arey between gasping breaths.

“That was unexpected,” Billie said, a hint of confusion in his voice.

“It would seem that Arey is not destined for Hel,” Odin stated flatly.  “She cannot go with you.”

Billie placed a hand on my shoulder.  “Go, Crys. I’ll take care of Arey for you.  I promise.” Billie’s deep, brown eyes shimmered with sincerity.

Taking one last look at Arey, I made a silent promise that I would come back.  Cat, Astveig and I set off into the bleak realm of the unworthy dead.