Alice was an ordinary office worker she work 9 to 5 when she was heading home from a 12-hour shift while she was crossing the street she got hit by a car when she woke up she found herself in a White room she look around and saw that there was a woman in a blue dress looking at her when the woman spoke she said I'm sorry to inform you but you are dead
when Alice heard this she was scared but the woman said do not worry you will be Reincarnated into a new world with magic when Alice listened to this she was excited because when she was a kid she love watching fantasy movies while Alice was thinking about her new life the woman said if you want to you can forget all of your memory of this life and can trade them so you will be stronger there if you want when Alice heard this she said yes woman nodded and said good luck in your new life.
meanwhile, in orario Freya was on her way to go to Hostess of Fertility to work and to meet bell on the way to the dungeon when Freya was going to change to Syr when she notices a baby in a basket in front of the pub when she looks at the baby she felt a strange connection Freya decided to use her ability Discerning Eye when she did the colour was pink, red
and black Freya was surprised so she took a closer look at the baby and noticed it had 2 black wings on the back and a tail that was heart shape at the end she didn't know why but she picked up the basket the baby was in and then went back to her home was she did she put the basket on the bed took the baby out and she started to inspect it so sees why was she drawn to it after a while she put the baby back in the basket and started to see what race was it because she hadn't seen one before why looking she found out that is was a succubus while reading about the races she found out that baby needed some DNA to wake up she put the book down and give the baby some of her blood when she did the baby started to changer after some time the baby looks like her but with crimson hair and black eyes when the baby started to wake up Freya had a small.
Grammar and overall composition needs work.
I can't remember the words but the flow of what you're reading doesn't really match a novel/book. It's too, to the point if that makes sense.
I'd suggest having a look at some books with reincarnation scenes to give you an idea what to work towards. Also add " " for when people are talking.
Something to keep in mind is you want to set the scene a little better as well. So while there is nothing of note in the white room maybe spend more time on the person who reincarnated the MC. Also have some form of dialogue/conversation.
Interested to see your growth going ahead and looking forward to more.
Waa this story dropped