Wren’s stomach felt like a storm in a bottle as they pulled into the docking portal. It didn’t help that Bonnie looked even worse than she did.
“They’re gonna do like I said,” Bonnie grunted, not sounding at all confident. “Just remember; as long as you’re not a threat to them, they’re not gonna hurt you.”
The Daedalus rocked, unsteady beneath their feet as the docking portal sealed with her hull. Bonnie’s arms went up, and Wren haltingly matched her body language. She felt compelled to take her cues from the redhead, and her eyes darted back and forth from her to the door. Redhead. Door. Redhead. Door.
When the airlock finally opened, Wren’s eyes widened as she watched four men come through with rifles raised to their shoulders. They were all business, targeting both her and Bonnie briefly before they began systematically searching through her ship. Four more men, equally armed, came through just behind them, but Wren was too busy watching the first group with nervous anticipation. She had nothing to hide, and had never smuggled a thing in her life, but she also didn’t really want people poring over her stuff.
Bonnie cleared her throat, and Wren’s head whipped back around just in time to see a ninth man emerge from the docking portal. Black hair and sunglasses. His dark gray suit hung imperfectly on his frame, a little short on the sleeves and a little wide on the shoulders. Wren had seen enough immaculate suits on Julien to know the difference when she saw it.
There was a blur of motion, and Bonnie had a pistol pressed to the man’s forehead before anyone, including Wren, realized she was even armed. The man seemed unfazed except for a slight thinning of his lips. Four laser-sighted rifles trained on her forehead, and Wren’s middle dropped precipitously.
“Eh, don’t lah,” the man said, as he raised one hand, palm open. Everyone seemed to take a half step back from the brink. “Don’t be stupid, can?”
Everyone but Bonnie, anyway. “I didn’t think you’d actually show up,” Bonnie snarled.
“You think you are the only one he betrayed ah?” the man said, his accent thick and halting.
“Bullshit.”
“Damn good to see you lah.”
“Bullshit,” Bonnie repeated, but the man stood his ground.
“You okay right? Okay then good lah.”
Bonnie’s lip curled as she pulled up on her shirt to reveal the bandage taped to her side. “如果你想杀了我,现在就试试吧.”
The man chuckled as he waved down at the armed guards behind him. “Guns down, guns down.” He cleared his throat as he turned back to her, and Bonnie looked increasingly unsure of herself when he spoke again. “Eh, Daughter. If we really want to kill you hor, you docking bay also won’t reach one.”
“Don’t fuck with me, Jackson!”
“Clean up in space easier,” he laughed. “Push you into a star can already! Easy!” He brushed his hands together twice, swiping the palms across.
Bonnie’s arm slackened, though she kept the scary-looking pistol flush against the man’s head. It was only then that Wren realized that she’d never seen that gun before. It hadn’t been among the arms scavenged from the first ship they encountered, which meant Bonnie had it stashed on board the whole time. That didn’t change anything for her, but it did raise Wren’s estimation of Bonnie.
“I have vodka.”
“Fuck,” Bonnie mumbled, under her breath. She slid the gun into a holster between her shoulder blades, underneath her shirt, and shook her head in frustration. Two of the guards came over to speak in the man’s ear, and then headed for the portal.
“Hold on hold on,” the man said. His fast-paced patois was rife with enunciation, and Wren had the feeling he was slowing it down on their behalf. “Eh. You really destroy a cruiser ah? Ride this piece of shit also can ah?”
Bonnie and Wren nodded, with Bonnie going one step further to tilt her head in Wren’s direction.
“Her?”
Bonnie nodded again, and the man turned his sharp eyes on Wren. Quick. Appraising.
“I mean,” Wren tittered nervously, “I think it was just a cutter. Not an actual cruiser, but… yeah.”
“Wah piang eh, steady lah! Damn power sia. Eh, you’re a long way from home, right?”
Wren blinked, and jerked a thumb over her shoulder. “No… this is pretty much home right here.”
His face split in a wide grin. “Orh. Spacer ah? Interesting.”
“Her ship needs some repairs,” Bonnie said, flatly. “Are we good to get that done?”
“Not unless you got hack a couple of banks on the way back lah, aiyoh,” he laughed. “This deck ah, got to step lightly one, sekali fall through leh!”
“It’s not that bad,” Wren said defensively. “The Daedalus is a good ship!”
“Look. Eh, looklooklook.” He shook his head and waved his arms, highlighting how poorly the sleeves were tailored for him. “Not say I say what lah, about this ship. I just can’t believe hor, this thing still in one piece after taking out a cruiser—”
“Cutter,” Wren interjected.
“Aiyah whatever lah. What I mean is, ship got holes. Damn big holes.”
“Can you fix it or not, Huat?”
The man rolled his eyes, tilted his head, and then stared back at her. “Wah lau eh. Of course lah. You think I here for what? Jiak zhua ah? Of course fix lah. Looklooklook. I show you something first.” He looked around, and then gestured to a display mounted in the wall. “Eh, I use this. Can?”
Wren nodded hesitantly, ears pinned back against her scalp as she watched him broadcast a vid from his p-comm.
“Eh come, you see,” he said, in his halting-yet-fluid accent. “Wah this ah, everyone kena right now, everywhere also got.”
Wren took a step toward the screen, squinting slightly. It was security footage. There was a milling crowd covering most of the screen, with two armed guards on the right side near a nondescript, but obviously off limits, door.
“Watch, watch.” He traced his finger along an interruption in the flow of traffic, an obstruction around which the rest of the people flowed without acknowledging. After a few seconds, a small girl appeared at the edge of the crowd. Her dress was ragged and dirty. She took two steps forward, into the space everyone else was giving around the guards, and threw a pebble. A tiny little rock, not thrown particularly hard. It bounced off the chest of the nearer of the two guards without effect. The two looked stunned. The one who’d been hit took a step forward, his rifle raised over his shoulder as if he were about to strike the girl with the butt of it, but in the blink of an eye the girl had vanished into the crowd.
“Ah! There? You got see or not?”
“Yeah,” Bonnie said, irritatedly. “Those people were about to do nothing while that 肏你妈 hit that little girl. She was lucky to get away.”
“Aiyah no lah!” he said excitedly. “Look!” He backed it up and showed the moment where the girl began to run. “You see what they doing or not? They never back down leh!”
He backed it up again, and Wren looked closer. The outer line of people milling about neither acknowledged the girl sprinting past them nor reacted when the guards made to move in their direction.
“They never run away! You see or not? They never run away!” He pronounced the word ‘never’ so crudely it came out as ‘neh’.
To Wren, it just looked like mass indifference on the part of the crowd, but all the color was gone from Bonnie's cheeks.
“That little girl throw stone at policeman, can escape leh. They shelter her some more. Normally ah, the police don’t let go this kind of thing one. They normally will tekan her good good one. This time don’t have leh!”
“The rock seems like an odd choice,” Wren said.
“That’s what you did,” Bonnie said quietly, as she watched the looping vid in stunned disbelief. “I mean, yours was a little bit bigger, but…”
“Her one symbolic lah,” he said, as he closed off his comm and turned back to them. “You stand up to police. She also stand up to police. We everybody stand up to police. Siao liao, everything siao liao. All because of you.”
“Everyone knows about what I did?”
“They know what happen, they just dunno who only.”
“How?” Wren asked.
The man smiled. “Dunno who ah, go and leak footage from the cruiser—”
“Cutter,” Wren said absently.
“Whatever lah. Black box footage, understand? Some black hat crack the destroyed police ship, then go and share everything lor.”
“With everyone?”
“Yah.”
Wren nodded quietly.
“You know hor,” he continued, “I think got about four million people on Cheng Shih station want to buy you two chio bu a drink.”
“Not me,” Wren said, holding up her hands and shaking her head. “I’m no one’s poster girl.”
“They need this,” Bonnie said as she stared through the hull. “They’ve needed a win like this for a long time.”
“Now your money here no good already,” the man said. “You understand?”
“Yeah,” Wren said, smirking. “Means you’re gonna fix my ship for free.”
The man tapped the side of his nose and smiled. “I tell you. This one, I like her, man.”
Bonnie took a deep breath, back straightening as she said, “Well, better not put this off,” and strode through the docking portal without another word. Wren rolled on the balls of her feet, watching her go, and blew out a long breath.
“Eh. She’s a good girl leh. You know right? Buay pai eh. Not bad one. Sibeh sensible, no-nonsense one.”
Wren nodded. “Yeah, I uh…”
“You and her ah?” The man laughed, slowly at first and then louder. “Ok lah, ok lah! I don’t say anything ok? I diam, I diam.” He put out his hand and smiled. “Jackson Chua.”
“Wren Klide,” she responded, shaking his hand.
The man nodded again, a motion almost on the edge of bowing, and gestured toward the docking portal. “I show you… private place? While we doing the repairs you can stay there lah.”
“Sure,” Wren said, shrugging.
Jackson led the way through the portal and paused ever so slightly so that she could catch up and walk alongside him.
“So how you know Miss Li ah?”
“Who?”
“Bonnie lah. How you know Bonnie? She, uh… usually she work alone one.”
“Oh,” Wren said. “She, uh… she stowed away on my ship.”
“You kena trick by her lah is it?”
“Something like that.” Wren looked sideways and smirked. “So who’d you steal that suit from?”
“You dunno the fella lah,” Jackson replied with an abrupt laugh. “What thing? Fit no good ah?” Then he nudged her with his elbow and said, “Ahhh, no lah. This not my one. This one is I borrow for Miss Li one.”
“I didn’t take her as the type to go for a man in a suit.”
“No lah. She don’t trust suit one. When I heard she kena shot, I know confirm she will come back here to look for me. Luna 2 job is I give her one. That one, ah, my fault, my fault.”
Wren curled her lips like she had a bad taste in her mouth. “Were you trying to get her to shoot you back there?”
“No. Trying to provoke reaction lor.” He twitched his index finger at her. “Trigger. I purposely trigger her, understand? If I come in, I wear normal clothes, she won’t say anything one, but she still don’t trust me. She don’t say out only. You get it right?”
“So... you wore clothes you knew would make her angry to… pull that distrust to the surface?”
“Abuden? Yah lah! Then we chop chop deal with that, then move on! Better don’t let it fester.”
Wren blinked. “Oh. That’s… huh.”
“You do my line of work, don’t learn to read people cannot one.” Jackson smiled proudly, with just a hint of strut in his step. “If not hor, you kena shot lah.”
“And what is it you do here?”
“Ahhh. This and that lah. Little bit here, little bit there...” He led her into an elevator and smiled while it scanned his extended hand. “Got lobang do lor. Don’t have don’t do. Small thing only lah.”
“Except fostering a revolution.”
“Revolution where got money to make?” He smiled while he stared sideways at her, measuring her response. “Bad business lah. Fight for whatever cause ah, you wait long long then got good ending. You wait long long. Won’t have one.”
“I saw your face in there. You were thrilled when that little girl threw a symbolic rock.” Wren turned and gave him a long look. “Still are.”
“Sometimes hor, you don’t mean to start something, you balonglong still end up starting something.” He smiled the most genuine smile Wren had seen on his lips, but only for a moment. “Actually ah, the most suay thing here is that you confirm-plus-chop-plus-guarantee cannot play DBX here anymore.”
Every hair on Wren’s body stood up at once. “What?”
Jackson’s smile widened ever so slightly. “I zai zai liao lah! I knew it lah!”
“How did you know I played?”
“Cheng Shih Station number one market for DB betting you dunno ah? Stakes sibeh high leh,” he said, rubbing his fingers together. “Our metrics super deep one, you understand? Want to gamble smart, means you know who is playing, and how they playing.”
Wren’s jaw fell slack. “Yeah, but my identity? I thought that only my avatar was out there.”
“Not much info lah. Your picture lor. Your picture plus a bit more only. Others got more, but your EPL ah… uh… uh…” He frowned and snapped his fingers repeatedly. “Effective Points per Life, yah? Very the high leh. Kee siao lah, so high for what? Spoil market lah you. Confirm not anyhow hantam whack one. Some people get lucky one two rounds only. One or two games also got, but you? Always so high. One look can tell confirm got strategy one lah.”
“I don’t know if I should be flattered or creeped out,” she said.
“Aiyah no lah,” Jackson laughed. “You see ah, everybody on Cheng Shih Station know TasmanianBluDevil. Maybe got a few can recognize picture. Wren, simi Wren? Nobody know lah.”
The elevator pinged, and Jackson politely gestured forward. Wren took a few hesitant steps into what appeared to be fairly spacious living quarters. “You’re doing pretty well for yourself,” Wren said approvingly.
“This one not my place lah.” He tapped at an interface near the door, and one wall of the apartment became transparent, overlooking the the Daedalus. “Na. For you.”
Wren placed her elbow on the wall and rested her head against her wrist as she stared out. The damage was more extensive than she could have guessed. On the one hand, it wrenched her heart to see her home like that. On the other hand, it was so much worse to see than to read about.
“You want to stay how long, you stay. We owe Miss Li. She say fix ship, we fix ship. She say jiak roti, we say steady pom pi pi. She say whatever, we do whatever. Okay?”
Wren nodded absently.
“Miss Li, she… uh. She staying here also is it?”
“I uh…” She shrugged, staring down at a section just above the forward viewports where the ablative plating had been chewed through almost to the hull. “Maybe. I’m not sure.” The sound of the elevator door opening behind her jump started her brain. “Hey. One more thing.”
“Hmm?”
“Was it important? What you had her do when she was on Luna 2?”
Jackson closed the elevator door and licked his lips. “Miss Li is what kind of person? Soldier, you understand? She only know how to fight. You put person in front of Miss Li, she no problem, gao dim the fella for you, she also shiok. She damn power one. But, corporation how to fight? Huh? How you punch paperwork, you show me lah, you show me how to do.
“That time she came to me, she say, Jackson, I got the… evidence. She gong-gong dunno what to do. She not… You ask her do that kind of thing, she dunno how, but then hor, do nothing lagi worse. She need to do something one. Soldier is like that one.” Jackson made a halting, downward chopping motion with his flattened hand. “Always settle fast, chop chop, very garang, chiong the enemy. So, I give her enemy lor.”
“I get that she was there to kill someone, but was it worth it? Was she after someone that really mattered?”
Jackson frowned, and exhaled long and slow through his nostrils. “If a corporation lose a shark, lose a key personnel, who you think they bring in to replace?” He licked his lips and shook his head. “Every job I give her is important one. Those people, they...”—he shook his open hands at her— “their hands not clean one. Understand? Bad people. All deserve to die one. But get rid of them, in the end, still...
“All the clues Miss Li gave me, corruption lah, shady deals lah, hosei, all correct. But I tell you, all this just scratch the surface only. You want to settle, also cannot settle. This hole don’t have bottom one. You understand? This monster pah buay si eh - no matter how you whack also cannot kill. If got plot, always cannot trace back to just one person, one plan. It’s like, a shirt, got loose thread. You pull this thread, you never stop pulling. Got no end one, you understand or not? Don’t have any so-called final mastermind. Sometimes… I also feel like want to vomit blood like that. But, bo pian, no choice, have to do something. Otherwise, we all gone case liao.”
Wren nodded, bleakly, and said nothing more as Jackson entered the elevator and left.
I'm fascinated by Jackson. Mainly because I think I've rarely, if ever, seen heavy accent portrayed through text to give a character personality. Usually it's like "they had a thick [whatever] accent" and the rest is written in plain English. I'll admit he's hard to understand at times but it really paints a vivid portrait of the character for me.
I took a lot of inspiration from The Expanse series, and the Belter Speak really fascinated me. It was its own kind of storytelling, exploring the class dynamic that existed in a different way. I tried to capture that, for better or worse.
a pair of cop killers named Bonnie and Klide, eh? 😂
As far as I know, no one else has ever noticed that. It's not a mistake. I did it on purpose, but I never said their names at the same time.
I tried to read this chapter but that guys speech just gave me a headache, Bonnies chinese was easier to read than him.
I'm sorry that this isn't the story for you! He's speaking Singlish, a real patois spoken, much like Chinese, in many places that are not the US.
Good luck getting the medical attention you need!
@AwkwardMD My point was I can't read chinese at all, and his speech was like reading bad english, backwards. I like the story but his "accent" was to the point that I actually couldn't tell what he was saying even rereading paragraphs a few times.
Also it'd be nice if you added chinese translations in like footnotes or something.
@ashkar it is not "bad English". It is a real language that real people speak.
You might not like my choice to include it, but please be respectful of other cultures.
@AwkwardMD I didn't say it was bad english, I said it was the same as trying to read bad english. And it IS english words without proper english grammer so.... Also your story is in english so you should offer english "subtitles" for the non-english dialog.
@ashkar i'm sorry that the existence of other languages and other cultures is hard for you, but this story exists in a multi-cultural space. I choose not to cater to a "we only speak English here" audience. This story currently has readers from more than 100 countries here on Scribble Hub. The site gives me metrics on that. I have 80 readers from Sweden, 35 from Indonesia, and 4 from Algeria.
If you want to run things through a translator, those exist, but the limited third person perspective means that you know what Wren knows. Her reactions to things are huge clues, if you're still uncertain. I wrote her very carefully, and yes, there are some things I am keeping from Wren. This is a choice that I made.
I'm sorry that this is not the story you wanted it to be.
@ashkar I understood that the choice to portray Jackson's accent through his speech rather than by reference was a deliberate one. I assumed that we aren't meant to understand everything he's saying (which, if the story is from Wren's perspective is not a wrong choice).
Some authors write a story from a character's perspective but include details in narration that the character doesn't know for dramatic effect. It seems that in this story's case, we're limited to Wren's perspective.
I'll admit that it was hard to understand some lines here and there but I overlooked it because of how much it added to the personality of the character. The character would have come across very differently if his speech was translated for us. I mean, I understand why other authors just do "they had a thick [whatever] accent" and leave it at that -- writing Jackson's dialogue must have been a lot of work. But not doing that here made this chapter a lot more colorful, in my opinion.
@AwkwardMD Unless you're a linguistics professor like Tolkien, using something real is the only way to get something that's both consistent and not *incredibly* stilted.
@Falanin I took some inspiration from The Expanse in terms of the way it handled physics and, specifically, the Belter patois. I thought that was a really interesting, and when I was working on developing this part of the story I asked some friends about developing something similar but more rooted in southeast Asian languages. Fortunately, my good friend and translator Katie was fluent in Singlish, a language that already takes elements of Thai, Han, Cantonese, Malay, Tamil, and mixes that with a varying amount of Indian English.
I could not have asked for a more perfect tool, and I'm so proud of its inclusion.