Greetings, my name… was? is? …actually… it's not that important…

I used to be a great soldier. Very patriotic at a young age, I volunteered to join the army when I was 15, with great dreams of serving my "Great" nation, to defend my fellow citizens from "the enemy".

But it all went down the drain after the war.

We won, we defeated our only neighbour in the continent. You must think that would be good, right? I mean now our "great" empire was the sole state in the entire region, that's great, right? No. So, naive and… wrong.

With the absence of a common enemy, provinces, well, more accurately, Metropolises, broke away. Resulting in The Confederacy. It was the worst thing to ever happen in the history of mankind. The rivalry between the Cities led to an arms race, and at the same time, hedonism. 

It only took 25 years for the resources to become scarce from overconsumption.

We burnt through the food, to feed the overpopulated cities (From only having 2 children at most, populi from the cities start to breed like vermin, commonly having 6-7 children).

We burnt through the fuel, to feed the war machine against people that were once our brothers.

Enough rambling, you must wonder why this is all past tense.

I killed myself.

I could not stand to see my once "great" nation engage in debauchery and fall into decadence. I was forced to kill the man who saved my life in The War To End All Wars.  He was a medic, Father of five kids…

I wasn't happy, my rose tinted glasses shattered, and I realized how horrible everything was, even before The Confederacy, before the war.

So I decided to take my fate in my own hands. I grabbed the gun that I was given when I volunteered, put it in my mouth, aiming at the roof of it, in the direction of my brain.

And pulled the trigger.

…

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….

Man. This fucking sucks doesn't it? I mean, I did all that monologue to myself right before killing myself, and now I am drifting in this void. I was so serious and self righteous. Like, come on, that was a pretty good monologue, right? …right?...

And now here I am, floating in a purple hazy void, I can see some books floating about…

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They are all… novels? romance novels… I guess I'll read them… there isn't anything else to do…

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[About 200 hours later]

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Wow, they all suck! Some are clearly just written so that the author can write their poorly disguised fetish… and they are really fucked up fetishes… what the fuck man..

Oh, you, yes you, I know who you are, after reading so many of these… "books" I am pretty sure I am some kind of "protagonist" that is about to be reincarnated. Ise-cay or something like that, right? Huh. Weird…

…

…Well the cat is out of the bag i guess, All that act about being a veteran soldier is… well… not exactly a lie. I was a soldier yes but… just that. A low ranking soldier, I didn't exactly fight in the front lines but in Artillery, I did know how to shoot but I was assigned artillery…

Well I guess it's just a matter of time before some, system or deity gives me some kind of deal or option to reincarnate, or I am going to just be thrown in some cave with a random set of traits or a class, hell maybe I'll be one of those humans with beast traits, like, I don't know, spider stuff? a tail? something of the sort…

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[50 hours later]

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I feel like I am going insane. Please. Author. Deity, whatever. Please just get the story started my god i am going to kill myself again i swear this is so fucking boring…

[Oh sorry I was just trying to build a world just for your sorry ass… Guess you'll be sent to my incomplete mess. You impatient fuck]

OH COME ON WAIT I DIDN'T MEA-