Alex
As we chased Jace at the edge of the continent with sheer cliffs with raging oceans below to our left and unscalable mountains to our right, Jace turned on his heel and threw a metal cylinder at the ground between us. Assuming that the metal cylinder was yet another smoke device, we swiftened our pace in order to bypass the smog spewer before it activated. Alas, the metallic curio was not a device capable of the dispersion of a mist which would hinder the vision of those attempting to see through or from within the area around the object, but it was instead an incendiary device—the cylinder brought about an exothermic combustion reaction.
James
Woah there, buddy!
If you're going to interrupt me, at least do so in the common tongue.
Oh, and are y—
Alex
I am speaking in the common tongue, yet you are analphabetic and thus unable to comprehend my speech.
James
OH YEAH?! I bet analphabetic isn't even a word!
Alex
Analphabetic is a word; not knowing of something does not necessarily indicate that the unknown object or concept does not exist, and using such reasoning expresses your lack of knowledge.
James
Okay, if analphabetic is a word, then what does it mean?
Alex
Analphabetic individual has approximately if not the same meaning as benighted person.
James
Alex, stop messing around. There's no way benighted is a word.
Alex
Yet again you claim that your knowledge of literature is universal and that words of which you have no knowledge do not exist. Typical James; foolish as usual.
James
Uh huh, sure. Define benighted.
Alex
Benighted individual has approximately if not the same meaning as analphabetic person.
James
This is why no one likes you.
Alex
Due to your failure to define "this", I am going to assume that the reason "no one" likes me is that I am simply better than everyone else and the jealousy of all others overwhelms them so much so that they are incapable of considering harboring anything other than raw animosity toward me.
James
Would you PLEASE just shut UP and get back to telling the story?
Alex
... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...
James
... Why are you suddenly silent? Are you going to continue?
I think it's because you t—
James
What does this have to do with me? He's the one being quiet all of a sudden.
James, you told him to shut up, remember?
James
Alex, nod if that's it.
I think he wants paper.
James
Jeeeez Alex, could you stop being such a pain?
DOES ANYONE HAVE A PIECE PAPER AND A WRITING UTENSIL?
James, I don't mean to insult your intelligence, memory, or consideration for others, but surely we could just have Alex write directly on the paper you gave me? You know, the paper for the transcription of everything said at this gathering that you told me to keep? You wouldn't forget about the oh so important job you forced upon me, right? The assignment that was so important that it simply had to be done by me specificly despite my lingering exhaustion?
James
Oooooof cooooourse I didn't forget about what I told you to do, I mean, uh, it's not like you're weird enough to stand in the corner at a desk for no reason and that job I gave you, yeah, the writing one, is just so important that... I could never forget it? Yeah. That.
...
James
...
...
James
... Soooooo, about that pen and papeerrrrr...
I then proceeded to walk around James, ignoring his outstretched hand, and gave the papers to Alex with a strained, sympathetic grin on my face after writing down everything that just happened.
Alex (Written)
Why are you writing instead of typing?
(Written)
One word: James.
Alex (Written)
Ah, he always was in favor of using antiquated technology.
(Written)
Antiquated, of course. That. So, could you please continue telling the tale... out loud?
Alex (Written)
I could, but that doesn't mean I will.
James
WHAT ARE YOU TWO WRITING ABOUT?
James, stop shouting. We're having a productive discussion that we neither want nor need you to be a part of.
(Written)
Sorry about that, James gets upset when he doesn't receive enough attention. He's quite the pain, but he's a damn good leader.
Alex (Written)
I know it. So, you wanted to say?
(Written - Fine Calligraphy)
May you PLEASE continue to tell all of those whom are present about what happened at Flengriam?
Alex (Written)
Flengriam? I thought we were already past that part. Did Hazel not tell a good chunk of the tale before heading off to her room? I saw her literally storming past me on my way back in as I went through the grand halls. Oh, but you have no need to worry about damages—I already dealt with the necessary repairs.
(Written)
Repairs? She sure has gotten more open with her emotions since everything went down, hasn't she?
Alex (Written)
You have no clue.
(Written)
Oh shoot, we got totally off topic. It looks like we were writing abouuuut... right! You were going to c—
James
CAN WE PLEASE JUST CONTINUE ALREADY?! YOU TWO HAVE LITERALLY GONE THROUGH A FULL SHEET OF PAPER!!!
(Written)
Remember, you're telling the part of the tale that took place in Flengriam.
Alex (Written)
Wait, which part in Flengriam are we talking about? Are we talking about the one before for after the part I was saying?
(Written)
Man, I don't know; I'm barely awake and running on four hours of sleep total over the past three days. Just pick one and start telling it with confidence.
Alex (Written)
Will do. I am glad James chose to hire you—it is rare that he makes good decisions, but adding you to the guild was definitely one of them.
