"Amelia..."

Innis ran over, crouching down to inspect Amelia's wounds with worry written all across her face. 

"B... b-big... s-sister..."

"Who did this to you?"

I took a slow step to my side, trying to cover Shizu from view.

"...I..."

Amelia turned her head painfully, looking at where Leo, Shizu and I stood.

Then, gradually she raised her petite hand, her shaky finger pointing to... me.

"Ryuji... you... you did this to Amelia...?!" Innis asked, and for the first time ever, I saw anger streaking across her face.

The flow of mana pouring out from her intensified, like the apex of a tempest, dragging me under the raging currents and tearing me asunder. Her mana reserve felt almost limitless. I couldn't believe that Innis had been hiding all that mana all the times I had met her before and felt practically nothing.

Visible icicles formed in the chill air and on us as the temperature in the room continued to rapidly freefall, reaching a point where I could no longer even move anything except my mouth.

"N-n-no, it wasn't me!" I said, unable to control my chattering teeth.

But it was Amelia's words against mine, and it was obvious who Innis trusted more.

The blazing azure of Innis' eyes deepened, dimming everything around her, with the entire shop beginning to break apart as the walls and ceiling cracked, frozen pillars of ice appearing from their crevices.

Even Shizu next to me was powerless against the cold that had taken over the room, freezing her entire body from head to toe and preventing her from speaking.

This was it.

I was dead.

I should had just stayed shelled up in my room after Kaito's death. Instead, I tried to get out and train myself for... what exactly?

A still image of the faces of the children from the outer skirts of the city flashed in my eyes, seeing their smiles, their laughter.

Then the image of their eyes after Kaito's death appeared before me -- broken, hatred, distrust.

Ah, that's right.

I wanted to make this world a better place. 

And I guess I would die before achieving that.

~x~

Clouds surrounded me. Where was I? It was a place that looked as though a dreamy filter was applied to everything.

"So you've given up?"

"Huh?" I spun around, feeling a sense of deja vu.

"Look down."

I glanced downwards and saw someone that I hadn't seen for what felt like a very long time.

It was the squirrel god -- Gunsey.

"The fact that you're here, means you've given up, right?" Gunsey asked, disappointment in their voice.

"I didn't exactly get a choice," I sighed, sitting down on the clouds. "Weren't you watching what happened?"

"Yeah, I was," Gunsey replied. "You gave up."

"What?" 

"Yeah, you gave up."

"What do you mean 'gave up'?" I asked, my voice rising in frustration. "You pitted me up against the level 9999 secret final boss when I barely made it to level 10!"

Gunsey shrugged, "I'm just saying it like how it is, Ryuji."

I stared at Gunsey in disbelief and anger. "Anyway, if you're a god, why the hell didn't you isekai me with stronger powers?"

"You did get isekai'd with strong powers."

"You're joking, right? Did you see how strong Shizu was?"

"Hey, I wasn't the one that isekai'd her," Gunsey said, giving me an annoyed look. "You were strong, Ryuji. I gave you a mana reserve that only one-in-a-million would normally be borned with in that world."

"Then why is Shizu so much stronger than me?"

"Being isekai'd means you normally carry some of your prior life's skills and hardship along with you. Shizu was a child soldier in her previous life."

Shizu was...?

Damn... I had no idea Shizu had such a hard life in her old life...

It made me feel like crap, thinking that I had a hard time being a shut-in in my previous life.

"You were quite smart in your previous life too," Gunsey continued. "That's why that translated into your strong mana affinity in your isekai life."

"What use is that though?" I said bitterly. "If I didn't get a chance to train up to a level where I would be able to properly use it."

"Now you're just looking for something to blame." 

"I..."

"Look, life isn't perfect. You should know that better than anyone else, seeing how your old life went. Everyone has to make do with what they get borned with. Both strengths and weaknesses."

"..."

"If you want to be born with a perfect life, how about I just isekai you as a barbie doll or something? That way you won't even have a brain to complain with."

"...I'm tired, Gunsey..."

"Well, you will have a lot of time to rest in the afterlife," Gunsey said, then clicked their tiny fingers, creating a sphere of light behind them, leading up to a staircase. 

I glanced up wearily at the translucent staircase.

"If you're done, just head up those stairs, Ryuji," Gunsey sighed, crossing their arms. "I won't stop you."

"...Why did you isekai me in the first place, Gunsey...?"

"You wanted a second chance, right?"

"..."

"I heard you when you died. You were thinking 'I wished I had a second chance'. So, I made it happen."

"..."

"What a mistake that was," Gunsey said, shaking their head. "You did things almost exactly the same as in your old life. Well, I have to admit you had some good moments, like getting out of your bed after what happened with Kaito, but still."

"..."

I gazed up at the staircase.

"Well?" Gunsey asked. "You going or not? I have a lot of other worlds I'm looking after."

All of it could be over if I just walk up that staircase.

I won't have to worry about trying to survive.

I won't have to worry about Shizu doing something crazy.

I won't have to worry about what anyone else thinks of me.

I won't have to think anything anymore.

...

So why am I hesitating?

Even though I was exhausted and sick of it all, my feet didn't move. I was tired of trying my best to make the best out of every situation, only to fail over and over again. Sometimes it was my fault, sometimes someone else's, sometimes things just happened out of my control. What really is the point of all this suffering? 

Why?

"...I... I don't want it to end like this..." I mouthed bitterly.

Gunsey glanced at me, surprise in his beady black eyes. "What?"

"...I said... let's keep going..."

"Even though you might fail?" Gunsey asked. "Even if you might get hurt? You still want to keep going?"

I smiled painfully at Gunsey. "It can't hurt... to keep it going for a little longer..."

"..."

Gunsey stared at me silently for a moment, before smiling back at me. 

~x~

I was back at the doctor's shop, freezing to death as I watched Innis' mana level continue to rise to insurmountable peaks. 

I glanced besides me, seeing the frozen statues of Shizu and Leo behind me, looks of horror stuck on their faces. 

Then I glanced back at Innis whose eyes shone like a frightening spectre of pure mana energy. 

Mustering all my strength, I shouted her name as loud as I could through my hoarse dry throat, "Innis!"

She didn't hear me. 

Come on, Ryuji, think!

Closing my eyes, I turned inwards, searching for traces of my own mana against the boundless sea of mana erupting from within Innis. It was like trying to search for a needle in a hay sack. But I continued, trying my best to ignore the pain and blisters enveloping my entire body.  

Fear and doubt filled my mind as I searched fruitlessly for my mana, but I knew that if I didn't try, then this would be the end. 

Dammit! Where was it?!

At that moment, a soft voice suddenly beckoned to my mind. 

"Ryuji!"

I didn't recognise the voice, although it sounded oddly familiar. 

Who was trying to call me?

"It's me, Amelia!" the voice said.

A-Amelia...?!

Shit, was I already dead?!

"No, you idiot!" Amelia's voice said. "I'm speaking to you through a magical connection using what little mana I still have. Obviously I can't speak to you through my physical body considering the state I'm in, so this is the only medium for me to talk to you right now."

Talk to me? But didn't you blame me for what happened to you?

"I..." Amelia hesitated. "I wasn't trying to blame you...! I was trying to tell Innis that you saved me, but I ran out of energy before I could finish my words!"

What the hell?! So this is all your fault?!

"Anyway, follow me, alright?" Amelia said. "I can take you to your mana."

Hey, but you didn't answer my previous question!

I followed Amelia's frail mana state to a place that I had overlooked before. 

This is...

"That's where the core of your mana is stored," Amelia said. "Use it quickly!"

Alright, no time for questions.

I tapped into the mana source, and felt the familiar surge of energy.

Then, I used the strongest spell that I could cast.

"[ EXPLOSION ] —!!"

~x~

The entire doctor's shop blew up, releasing us out to the open wind as passerbys screamed around us, their faces shook and alarmed.

"What on earth was that?!"

"An explosion?!"

"The doctor's shop...!!"

Now out in the open, the freezing chill was significantly lessened to the point that Shizu and Leo next to me were able to move again.

"—Ryuji!" Shizu cried, grasping onto me immediately after she was unfrozen. "Are you okay?!"

"—Shit, wh-what happened?!" Leo said, staring around in shock and confusion. "We..."

I ignored the two of them for now, and shouted at Innis, "Innis! Stop this! I wasn't the one that hurt Amelia!"

The deep azure of Innis' eyes faded slightly, along with the mana flowing out from her. It seemed the shock from the explosion spell I casted had surprised her so much, it also snapped some sense back into her. 

"Why should I believe you?" Innis asked.

"Ask her yourself." I replied.

Staring at me for a moment, Innis' eyes gradually returned to normal as she sealed her mana back inside her, causing the chill in the air to disappear completely. 

"Ryuji, now's our chance!" Shizu whispered to me, getting ready to attack Innis. 

I whacked Shizu on the head with a karate chop, stopping her before she could do anything crazy. 

"Stop it, Shizu." I said.

"Okay..."

Innis bent down to Amelia, her expression softening as she spoke to her, "Amelia... it's me..."

"B... b-big... s-sister..."

"Was Ryuji the one that hurt you?"

Amelia used all of her remaining strength to shake her head weakly, "N-no... Ryuji... was... t-the one that saved me..."

"Is that so." Innis said, then smiled gently down at her. "Rest now, Amelia. I will ensure the doctor tends to your wounds."

Amelia nodded feebly, closing her eyes with a pained expression. 

Rising up, Innis turned to face me.

"What did I say?" I asked her. "I told you I wasn't the one that hurt Amelia. We found her in a badly injured state in the forest outside Lunaris, and decided to bring her back to be healed."

At least, that was mostly true. 

"I... I'm so sorry, Ryuji..." Innis said, guilt appearing on her face as she bowed her head apologetically. "I understand now. I seem to have made a terrible mistake."

To be honest, the misunderstanding was mostly caused by Amelia, so I felt bad that Innis was apologising instead. 

"Don't worry about it," I said. "At least, no one was killed."

"That's true, but that doesn't make up for what I've done," Innis said, grimacing as she glanced across at the blisters and wounds on Leo, Shizu and I. "You were the ones that saved Amelia as well..."

"We did what any sensible person would do when finding an injured person," I replied. "No need to—"

"—My shoppppp—!"

I glanced to the side to see the doctor falling to his knees in front of us, his face pale as ash. We stood at the charred remnants of what used to be the doctor's shop. 

~x~

After the grueling encounter with Innis, we found ourselves recuperating in the infirmary at the Grand Castle of Lunaris at the very centre of the city, where Innis had taken us to be healed. The luxurious room was adorned with the finest silks, tapestries, and ornaments, befitting the Lord and nobility who resided there. Soft cushions and warm blankets were spread over the plush cots where Leo, Shizu, Amelia, and I rested, surrounded by the gentle glow of the elaborate candelabras.

As we lay there, tended to by the skilled castle healers alongside the doctor, I couldn't help but feel as though I was dreaming. For the past weeks, I had been using the free accommodation provided by the Adventurers' Guild which although has improved since I moved up from Iron-rank to Steel-rank only meant that we moved from sleeping to the basement to the rooms offered by that same rickety tavern. It was like night and day compared to the grandeur of my current surroundings. 

"Ryuji~," Shizu greeted me, as she slipped past the thin white curtains that separated the beds from one another, entering into my area.

"What is it?" 

"Why are we still here?" Shizu asked with a confused look on her face, popping herself down at the side of my bed. "Aren't we already all healed?"

"Shizu, look around you. Do you really want to go back to sleeping at that rundown tavern so soon after experiencing this?"

I picked up the half-eaten plate of steak set on my overbed table that I was still eating. "I can't even remember the last time I had the chance to eat steak, not even in my pre-Isekai life," I said. "Besides, Innis said we can stay as long as we want to recover."

"That's true..."

I sunk back down on my bed, enjoying the comfort and warmth of the fresh fabric. "Just tell them your knee still hurts or something, Shizu. I think we deserve to enjoy ourselves a little after everything we've been through."

Silence followed for a moment, which I didn't mind as I was enjoying the peace and quiet.

"Hey..." Shizu's voice suddenly came up to my ear softly, surprising me out of my relaxation. 

I moved back slightly, staring at her face that was now placed very close to mine on the pillow. Without me realising, she had climbed next to me on my bed. 

"W... what do you want, Shizu?" I asked, seeing her wide violet eyes staring into me unblinkingly.

If I didn't already know that Shizu was a psychopath, she would actually look very cute from up this close. Although she always looked pretty from afar as well. 

Her long purple hair fanned out on the pillow, framing her delicate features. Dark lashes cast a shadow on her porcelain skin, drawing attention to the mesmerizing violet hue of her eyes. With lips slightly parted, she breathed softly, a light pink flush on her cheeks adding to her alluring appearance.

The gentle flicker of the candelabras illuminated an ethereal glow over her soft creamy skin, highlighting the curves going down her body that was fitted in a black negligee she had been given to wear.

Feeling uncomfortable, I tried to get up from the bed, but before I could move, she reached out and took hold of the back of my head, pulling me closer to her. Our faces were so close, our noses were almost touching each other.

She waited, and I waited too.

"Kiss me," she finally whispered.

"I'm not sure if that's a good id—"

She moved her lips forward and kissed me.