68 : Grazing Hope in Buckets of Old Mistakes
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Tsuki had plunged her dagger deep into the seemingly omnipotent protection of her opponent, creating a paradox. Her dagger, which was made to cut anything, faced something that didn’t have the concept of getting cut. An impossible procedure was queried, such that something needed to be cut for anything to proceed thereafter. The world slowed down to focus its existential computations on Tsuki’s dagger and the unseen protection in order to find a possible resolution.

In a flower garden, a place that came before all else and which Tsuki had been made to see once before, fires reaching the sky as if they were towers set ablaze were raging. Ashes, dust, and cinders danced a storm as flowers, bushes, trees, and all plant life that could be conceived were being ravaged by the very dirt that was today seemingly strangling their weak roots. Information streaked across this burning scenery as the flowers acting as blossoming neurons cried in pain at the calculation that was required of them. They cried out how the creator God had been naive, innocent, and mostly inexperienced – a fault they could only accept – when it made everything. There was an error that none of the flowers could handle. The best they could do was minimize the damage while someone with knowledge of how to fix the issue showed up. As for the someone in particular, only a fragment of them remained, with a bramble body and lackluster skill.

Tap Tap Tap Tap

The small, fragmented being ran inside this burning garden as if it was a castle under attack. She tried to root out plants and create long dividers of clay to control the flames, but whenever a zone was quarantined, a new area would burst into flames. She tried to make new paths and connections, tried to add rules and exceptions to them, and tried to snip the surge of information from its bud, which she discovered to be a patch of grass upon an isolated floating rock. Nothing seemed to work. The system her old self made was flawed from its inception!

Tap Tap Tap Tap

She landed upon the small floating rock, which reflected its form with a multitude of complexity, such that a new blossoming garden was uncovered. There, the flames were raging brighter, and again, she did all she could to control them. Again she traced the source, and again it came from an isolated location that reflected, refracted, and diffracted an entire new garden.

Tap Tap Tap Tap

She ran further into those kaleidoscopic gardens that smothered her bramble limbs until misfortune befell her. The source had split into two, and surely it would split again… "Will my creation burn like so from a simple unhandled error?" she lamented to herself. Her eyes hardened, and she steeled herself. She, as part of the creator, had a responsibility for her mistakes. She put forth her brambling limbs upon the two diverging paths and spread her consciousness with vine-like movements into both. They divided and broke off, multiplied and converged, and split into arrays of complex structures like labyrinths that made all the information going back to this small being overwhelming. Her brain was more likely to split open like her old self than to reach her current goal. With so much information being absorbed at once, the Burden, the very thing that had fragmented her, was trying to rip each of her cells apart. Cuts started appearing over her skin, followed by patches of necrotic flesh. Bones, sinews, and innards were uncovered as blood and sap surged out from her weak, wounded frame.

"Nooo…" she cried out, not even halfway to her target. Now with only half of her vision remaining, she looked at the fire slowly crawling onward. She begged for help from her mother, her father, her many brothers, and her many sisters, knowing they were empty laments that would reach no one anymore. If only she was still whole, this operation would have been a walk in the park… Biting her lip, she pushed her failing vine-like consciousness even more. Even if she wanted to scowl at Tsuki for the result of her action, she simply couldn’t. The fault was herself, and that girl was still one of her creations born from the system she had created. Not like a mother but more like a grandmother with one foot in the tomb, she smiled and accepted her death. It would be better like that after all, as someone actually competent could take her role.

As she pushed forward, she felt it. An overbearing sense of nostalgia exploded from behind her, and there, two small hands covered her bleeding eyes. "Fly, you fool," said the nostalgia intruding on the burning garden.

As if in a trance, the brambling god of creation ordered all that she was into the labyrinth-like paths as if all Burden had been removed from her. The information growing exponentially in size, which should have destroyed her a thousand times over, felt like a breeze to explore. Her broken skin was like new, and her tired mind was now completely at peace. That sudden being spilling out nostalgia and such was taking all of the Burden like a mother protecting her child. She hated that, as she was the one who should be protecting her own creation!

"There, those two. Connect them," said the nostalgia that was turning to melancholy. The brambling goddess let out a questioning yelp as she had yet to reach the end of her path. Still, she followed the order as if she had accepted her inadequacy to manage her own system. The two plants she connected had nothing to do with one another, but they caused a chain reaction that made rain appear from a cloudless sky. The fires quickly died, while the damaged flowers grew back stronger than before. "Finally, this one and this one."

She was pointed to a small, distorted red flower and a towering cactus that acted as a sort of relay. With this done, it was as if the garden had always been at peace. No damage could be seen as far as the eye could see. With time slowly picking back up, this fragmented creator goddess looked back behind herself at the being that had just saved her and saw a frail figure with a veil almost fully consumed by the Burden they had taken. The goddess knew this little figure too well and looked in the distance at a large tree protecting incalculably many flowers under its shade as the figure fully faded away. It only looked so strong at a glance…

"If only you would take my place…" lamented the now-lone goddess.

A small gust came and caressed her hair softly, along with delivering a fait whisper, "I’ve had my fill of my existence. It’s your time to enjoy it as you should…"

"Fool! A parent should never have to see the death of their own child," responded the goddess, whose words no one could hear anymore and were uttered to nothingness…

*

 

With reality taking back its course, Tsuki’s dagger managed to cut open a simple concept of holiness. The girls felt it in front of them like the screaming head of a lion, with every strand of fur observing them with overwhelming intensity. It was like an invisible ruler was commanding divine punishment with its muted howls. Whatever it was, it still couldn’t be cut. Still, it could be eroded, smashed, broken, twisted, turned inside out, and much more. So, instead of getting cut, it was eroded, with its fur partly parting like bubbles.

"NO!" screamed the snake-like head of John wearing a muted mask. It slithered inside the lion figure and bit down as if trying to spread its venom.

BAM!

Like a falling star, the luminous vulture was taken down from the sky. Its wings were beyond damaged, and an arrow in the chest had finished it. Halambusha, with his bow already aimed at John, shot. The arrow created a sonic boom and stopped at once in its course in the presence of an invisible lion. The giant rakshasa felt as if he heard thousands of wings fluttering and was pushed by a gale that was, in truth, missing.

"Eroding…" A whisper came from John’s direction.

Tsuki ran forward and avoided a sort of paw with claws more numerous than fur by taking flight in the form of a cloud of petals. She formed back high in the air, her tail swinging left and right as if she was in a trance, and jumped toward the beast by using a floating scaffolding of petals. As she flew, all the white and black petals had surrounded her and protected her from what she considered to be invisible wipes.

"Corrupting…" another whisper.

A piercing glance turned toward her with the might of a million people all stabbing at her with pitchforks and the like. The crows all formed a barrier and were set ablaze when hit by a flame that wouldn’t let go. Still, they pushed on in the pain to stand like an everlasting obstacle in front of the strange monster. She formed her long glaive and brought it down with a spin to add centrifugal strength to what now looked to her to be a smiling goat. Her weapon clashed with the beast's forehead and repelled her without ever being infected by the weapon's petals.

"Manipulating…"

Hoomaikai quickly pulled Tsuki back with her sorcery and came face-to-face with a charging bull’s horn. She tried to back down and found herself as if stuck in a swamp. A clawed hand pulled her back just in time as Halambusha clashed with the un-sense-able creature. He was pushed back with his chest gored open, yet he managed to take hold of the beast and stand his ground. Hoomaikai, in a burst of lightning, came to the side of the beast and struck with the scepter. Its claw dug deep into something. This time, a raging fury exploded out of the weapon and created traces inside the creature like leopards running in the sand toward a centralized prey, John.

"Unfaithful…"

John turned his snake-like head with a mask whose silent expression felt like a lie and readied himself to gobble up all the small leopards. His jaw opened wide like a black hole, and Hoomaikai felt dread for Mafdet, who had fully infiltrated the strange beast surrounding John. A jaw opened wide, closed, and drew blood. Hoomaikai, who had seen everything take place, couldn’t comprehend her eyes. The other head of John, which had been mostly inert until now, had bitten down the other head’s neck. Then, all the small leopards managed to slash at John.

The head that had been betrayed screamed in pain as the figure protecting him dissipated from a lack of focus. Using this chance, Tsuki descended from the sky like a meteor. Her glaive dug deep into John’s chest, and she jumped back before he could attack her in return. Following her example, all the small leopards started fleeing just moments before a pillar of light could consume John.

When the light faded, the group found themselves faced with two masked men instead of one. One with a muted mask and the other with a crying one. Like before, it was the muted mask that acted first. He screamed and laughed like a mad man, then made a dash toward the corpse of the luminous vulture. Uninterrupted, he jumped at the corpse to start eating it. He ripped flesh and feathers alike, which he all consumed before the crying mask John could tackle him to the ground.

The two of them fought with one another, and with a resolute voice, the crying one said, "You have disrespected your own faith in the Lord and made him nothing more than an excuse to attain your frivolous goals! You are not I; you are a parasite I allowed to fester for too long! Rethink your reverence for our Lord or be destroyed by my fists!"

"Lord?" responded the other John, still laughing maniacally. "We’ll see. See… See. When I bring the Lord back…" With this, light drowned him, and he had disappeared.

Before the group could do anything, the crying mask man said, "I will stop him. I will end him," and he disappeared the same way as his other self.

In an instant, the dark world they were in vanished and made way for the burned forest. All that was left were the corpses of a normal vulture and a cat…

 

The cold winter wind howled over a burned landscape and mixed together with the cries of a young girl. Like the dry branches scratching one another, her little fingers clawed at her own flesh so as not to damage the coat of the man she saw as her father. His calm smile and melodious voice, the child cried for what were now just memories. A giant with burning fur kneeled before the corpse and lifted it up with all the respect he knew how to give.

"NOOOO! GIVE DAD BACK!!!" cried out the child, who jumped at one of the giant’s large legs. Her claws dug so deep into his flesh that she hoped to sever a tendon or weaken a muscle. Still, the giant walked on with deep scarlet petals emanating from his fur. The petals floated down weakly to embrace his own wounded flesh and fill the crevices and holes made by the child. "HEAL DAD; NOT YOU!! THIEF! USELESS!! STUPID!!!"

Halambusha kept walking on, ignoring the child. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to heal Vergeltung, but that something in the cat was now missing. Even if he had the talent to grow back the cat’s head, it would turn into a soulless puppet ready to be taken advantage of.

"Halambusha," said Tsuki after a while. She was looking at the surroundings and thinking about how far they were still from the city. This place should have been a wonderful place in the summer. Large trees giving enough shade and protection from the wind, paths entwining around large stone formations, and healthy dirt still giving birth to secluded vegetation even in winter made this place any better than the next. "I’ll start digging…"

If they got too close to the city, then there would be a chance for any great or mediocre tomb they made to be damaged. Tsuki was doubting the city would even be standing after a week with how powerful John was by himself. Even if just 10% of the bulk of the abominations’ army was as strong as John, then they would all be doomed. Burying the cat in this place might allow them to return one day and take care of the tomb.

"What… What are you planning to do with dad?!" asked Mafdet. She had managed to return to her fleshy self, but there were still numerous black spots marking her skin.

Hoomaikai, who couldn’t take it anymore, took the child in her arms and held her tightly. She wasn’t as much recomforting Mafted as she was recomforting herself.

Up in the trees, a few crows sang their croaking tune under the gaze of one large owl. This last observer wasn’t Tsuki’s summon, and she would have gotten worried it was out for some nefarious goal if it wasn’t for its sleepy countenance. Still, with her glaive in her hands as if it was a shovel, she dug the cold dirt akin to clay herself.

All in all, the group wasn’t sure what they were supposed to be doing, but under the guidance of Halambusha, a grave nice enough to not put shame on the cat was made… With the guise of cries from such a small girl as Mafdet to decorate the calm forest, the group went back to the city with a heavy but resolute heart.

 

While they were gone, all of the abominations had been cleared out, just as the thick smoke above had dispersed slightly to adorn the destroyed houses with rays of soft light. In most places, only a few injured people lamented their fate, oblivious to those who truly suffered the worst fate a few hundred meters away. Some had died, obviously. A tale as old as life.

Still, as one chaos left with the destruction of the invaders, another blossomed from the survivor discovering the extent of the damage. With kids crying for selfless sacrifice done by those they looked up to and the very opposite with parents with empty cribs because they couldn’t do anything, the sky with its rain of light was truly darkened by thick clouds of war.

A question constantly resurfaced with indignation from the mouth of the innocent: "Why?"

֍

 

Up in the snowy mountains, whose tips broke through the celestial vault to be washed with solar winds and a perfect starry view, a man appeared with the effervescence of multiple lights. He donned a broken mask with indistinct features and strung a maniacal laugh that made the onlookers somewhat spellbound. They all thought that here was a fallen kinsman whose mind had been taken by the most instinctive of changes. While they were abominations of Change whose own existence required that they change, they were more refined than most in this practice. As wines begin with simple grapes crushed and processed, they are changed with the passage of time, such that a year-old wine won’t be the same as one with more years on its belt.

One of the abominations looked up at the deep space above him, toward a planet they used to inhabit. He could see at time his predecessors rampaging in the dust storm like malignant beasts that act purely on instinct. The age of old was over, and they, the new era, had to avoid by any means the old conception that change only begot destruction and destitution. This abomination had no idea how this old conception was born but hypothesized it to have started from either fear or a need for survival.

This abomination jumped from his seat and called out to the mad John, "What has taken you so, brother?" He tried to stand in the way of his brother but was pushed away with a quick jerk. The unnamed abomination crashed into a pillar that tumbled upon him before slowly rebuilding itself.

John quickly vanished after taking an undescriptive object of wriggling form that was floating above a large dais.

His disappearance was quickly followed by the emergence of a new burst of light from which a maskless John came forth. "Where is he?!" he exclaimed to the other abominations’ surprise. Taking a glance at the slowly reforming pillar, he saw a familiar person, whom he quickly helped up.

"Brother?" asked the dizzy abomination.

"Yes! It is I. Now, tell me, I beg of you to have seen him go, where HE is…"

"You… He? He left over that way like a gale while taking with him the flesh of our originator."

"Damn I be!" lamented John, who looked toward the missing wriggling mass that was supposed to be sealed. His gray, tired eyes were weighted with a heavy Burden. When he managed to separate from his mad self, he did so at a great cost. Feeling his subconscious, the deepest part of what made him who he was, he could see his soul broken with omnipotent filaments wringing it like an old cloth. He had sacrificed much only to leave everything to his other self. "I fear for what he might attempt, and I should want to stop him at any cost. It isn’t because it’s right, but because he is wrong! So wrong. Oh, I tell you, brother. I was so wrong!"

"No! It is simply our curse that we must bear and not diverge from our ideal. Do not wound yourself with negative thoughts. Pray tell me, why were you sent down and what happened to you?"

John looked in the distance to refresh his mind and relayed what had happened to him. "We wanted to scout the underground laboratory of that emperor fellow. You should remember 25 years ago when that old planet was probed by him," he said, pointing at the dusty planet in the sky. "We learned back then that he had stollen a fragment of something unimaginably insidious for his so-called research…"

"But haven’t we succeeded in recovering this artifact? Why attack them once again after such a long time?"

"…Because we have reason to believe the emperor had hidden a fragment of this already fragmented artifact and that he had been experimenting on this surviving part for the last 25 years. And now! That cursed other me has left with the part we had recovered, thinking of using it like a simple compass! He thinks he has power over the artifact!!"

"Must we truly stop him then? What if you…he succeeded?"

"YES!!" shouted John, as if enraged by this truth. "He WILL succeed! And it’s the very reason we must stop him with all we have, as it is exactly what this dark emperor wishes! He has played us like fools, and he is insane enough to go to any length to attain his twisted little immortality. If my other self is allowed to reach the artifact, he will make it whole unknowingly, and the calamity that happened to our cursed home world will be relighted with thousands of flames! Existence itself is at stake, brother! We must leave at this instant or be damned eternally!"

"Bravo!" exclaimed a newly appearing abomination. While the two brothers looked human, this one was more like an ashen construct of bone fragments. Its voice was that of sneering like a venomous python waiting for its prey to tumble into its trap. "To have glanced this much at the truth, my dear friend, you amaze me – not. Go on, like the good boy you are, and try to stop that little emperor pet project. Surely, you can succeed with enough zeal, but I should want to lend you some help. Go down to the treasury and request this collection of books written on this quaint slab I’m handing you. Our lovely treasurer should be of great help if you simply request it from him."

The tired John looked at this abomination with untrained anger. Its words were so venomous that he felt his skin peel off. That pile of bones had undoubtedly a hand in this ordeal, yet his cards remained so mysterious that they could be a simple bluff or a dagger in disguise. John walked with some trepidation toward the older abomination, from which he tried to take the slab.

"Not so fast, my dear~" John’s hand was clasped by the other, who closed in on him until it was close enough to John to whisper in his ear. "This parcel of knowledge you hold dear only shines from when you were born until now. You are nothing. You know nothing. Should I enlighten you and destroy you at the same time? Stay in your lane. Be a good boy. It’s that emperor who is playing in our hands. Never mistake that little pawn. Now go forward like you should and listen to our order and nothing more~"

John pulled back with a small slab of stone with writing. His face was pale, and he wanted nothing more to do here, so he left in an instant toward the treasury with his head hanging low.

"Brother! Wait for me, as I shall prove to be of use to you. You need to come see me at my home before you leave. There’s someone I need to present to you. A human male who was in service of the dark emperor until not long ago…"

 

Important fact about some names. With my use of Ainu divinities, I first want to say that the names I use might not be accurate. There’s multiple reason for this, one being a sort of degeneration of the Ainu’s language followed by retrieved knowledge from the Ainu that isn’t always conforming. For example, I do use an Ainu god as inspiration for Tsuki and I found at least five ways to write said God. In the case of Vergeltung’s new name, I used Okikurumi while I could have used names from Wikipedia like Ae-oyna-kamuy, Oyna-kamuy, Ainurakkur, or the impossible Okikurmi. I used Okikurumi, which if you notice as one more ‘u’ than the one from Wiki, as it feels easier to remember, has the meaning of ‘He who smell like humans’, and would need the added ‘u’ due to the Japanese alphabet. Basically, the names of Ainu’s Gods are in a similar situation as Hercules vs Heracles or maybe Isolde (An old story used the name Isolde for multiple female characters. Kind of confusing.) would be more accurate. Another interesting fact is the existence of names like Kotan-kar and Kotan-kor that allude in some texts to be the same while other texts feel as if they are two different gods. Even Wiki push two creator god with similar name. So, whenever I’ll reuse one of those confusing name, I’ll also try to precise a bit more how and why the name is used in the story. One major confusion come from the fact that the Ainu didn’t use writing, but it was forced onto them by the Japanese. And because using Hiragana and such have the limitation where some sounds can’t be spelled, a lot of Ainu words are kind of mutated or just degraded to fit the Japanese alphabet mold…

Anyway, for Okikurumi, he’s basically the Ainu hero similar to Achilles, Hercules, or all those who are part human and God that do great thing in history and legend. In some way, you can think of him as a guide to the Ainu as was Virgil to Dante. He is the combination of two heroes as their stories were pretty similar. One hero was more related to war while the other was more related to teaching and divinity. One representation of this hero that I like come from Otawarerumono were the two main characters are inspired by this hero while reimagining the Ainu creation myth in an interesting way. This game is strangely a good way to learn of the Ainu. They even have an anime which I haven't seen yet.

There’s no need to know all that, I just like to share those facts which I find really interesting.

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