Secret And Emotion
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Elias Ashburn POV:

Later that night, after my father's unexpected eruption, I rushed straight upstairs on all fours, thudding up the creaking wooden stairs like a wild animal. It wasn't particularly because I didn't know how to react to my fathers outburst, or even if I should reconcile whatever previous relationship we had prior, but because my first and ultimate priority bared heavy weight on my small undeveloped body, clanging about in metal forged strikes wrapped in a slightly soot covered white cloth that was large enough to cover me three times over. I prudently side stepped through my rooms door, aware of the vast length of the veiled weapon, and infused a slight hinge of mana into my arms, catapulting the item atop my bed that I scrambled onto immediately after.

"Let's see what beauty is hidden beyond the depths of this cloth." I chuckled to myself, reminiscing on the image of my old curved blade that fitted perfectly into my fabricated grasp and sliced through an abundance of enemies.

Sigh, "Good times, good times indeed."

I clasped my hands together in a mischievous rub and pounced on the blank cloth, tearing away at the cover of the blade like a starved beast startling on a rookie adventurer. The excitement seeped, quite literally, off of me as my hands burst into a slight sweat that moisturised my grip loosening it's edge on the over-wrapped sword. My tongue slipped from my mouth and rested on my carnivorous smile whilst my scarlet eyes preyed on the remaining folds, my beating heart drumming a suspending tune.

Dum, dum! Dum, dum! Dum, dum!

"Wow!" A warm hush escaped from my lips upon salvaging to the exterior of the blade resting at my knees. "It's beautiful. How did my father ever manage to get a hand on such a fine blade?"

Firstly, the scabbard that sheltered the blade glistened under the miniscule hint of light emanating from my candle, rested at my bed-side table. A layered black colour rose from the hilt of the sword to the end of the scabbard with hints of gold in a squashed diamond pattern at the hilt ingrained into the spaces fit between the ray skin wrapped tightly around it. A rope made of silk, dyed jet-black also, hung from the back end of the hilt with a single rusted gold bell siphoned and attached to it rustling with every movement. The scabbard itself boasted the same colours, as previously mentioned, but instead of a squashed diamond pattern, graceful gold carvings embedded in a strum throughout its length. As for the material of the make, both seemed to stem from Alvuin metal, originally discovered by dwarves, which was applauded for its dexterity, durability, beauty and usability in combat or anywhere practical really.

"Really Aldir, you out-did yourself with such an instrument." I praised my father, unbeknownst to him.

As the veteran warrior I was, the itch to unsheathe the blade became practically unbearable and with saliva leaking from my gob like a dog, I hopped over to the end of my bed, pulling the scabbard of and placing it one side.

"I know I already said this but...Wow~!" I repeated.

The actual sword was more elegant than even the previous sword I used in my past life, and that's a massive compliment when you take into account my previous sword was one of the 13 Limbs of God, hailed as one of the most powerful weapons any being can attain. The blade extended the usual 80cm, curving towards the end of the sword in an indigo tinge and the Hamon adopting a mulberry pigment greatly contrasting the gold and black. As for the guard, a common circular shape donned the end of the hilt, with a decorating detail of two dragons chasing each over, one being gold and black, and the other indigo and mulberry.

"Perhaps, this is also one of the Limbs of God? But how did my father gain possession of such a relic?" I pondered on the question as the blade which was now bolstered in my small hands, spewed intense energy akin to my previous weapon, Wrath. I examined the sword more attentively this time around, scouting each minute detail I would stumble across and as you would know it, on the interior of the scabbard the letters XIII followed by Time carved in a purple essence radiating. The essence itself was to dissimilar to mana and this was enforced by my inability to harness it or manipulate it.

"Strange..."

There is probably much I still don't know about my own world, but could there potentially be another force exempt from mana? The concept seemed grand and even far fetched but there was no evident proof to dismiss this possibility. This would also attest to things that do not seem to possess any hints of mana, nor elemental affinities yet still exist within the rules of "all living things contain mana".

"I'll keep a mental note of this, but for now, I need to deal with this sword. Maybe I can fish out the answer from my father?" I thought whilst scratching my chin in a motion imitating that of if I sported a beard.

After carefully placing the sword onto one of my draws on a stand, I sat back in my bed and fell backwards dramatically with a heavy smile imposed on my features.

"Something over than mana, huh?" I spoke before collapsing into a deep slumber.

***

"Were heading out dear!" My mother shouted to my father, who still sat shirtless in his underwear only, eating breakfast.

"Have fun!" He replied with a smile aimed to us.

Another chilly winter was approaching, and so was my fourth birthday, so for the last time this year we'd be able to actually by essentials from a market in nearby town before having to fend for ourselves for the rest of the unforgiving wintry conditions.

"What are you doing, Eli? You need to stay warm." Ronny bent over slightly wrapping a fur scarf round my neck, the same cheeky smile spreading through her features which has now started becoming usual and something I enjoyed seeing. I didn't know how to describe it, but seeing my youthful mother exert such happiness towards me through an almost cocky, yet caring, smile.

She gently nudged me forward out the door and shut it behind us, grasping her larger yet much softer hands in mine. Her onyx locks bobbed side-to-side as we stepped through the thin blanket of snow laid out before us. The bleached colour surmounted the landscape in a frail coat resembling my mothers pristine complexion that glossed in brilliant light reflecting off of her skin. She, just like me, equipped herself with a fur coat and scarf, brown in colour yet lightening the further it strayed from the stem protruding her hair that slung even past her hips.

"How long will it take us to get to the town?" I asked as I gazed up at my mother who hummed a pleasant tune that seemed to enthral even the nature around us as the birds flocked to surrounding branches, taking seats in the canopies outstretching shadows bound from the light.

"Ah, right, it's your first time going with me isn't it? This is quite special, for the both of us." She snickered pleasantly squeezing my smaller hand a bit more forcefully, her cheeks reddening. "Hmmm, well I think that at the current pace, we should arrive in the next thirty minutes or so."

"Thirty minutes. It must have been hard for you when you was pregnant with me then?"

She stopped and her eyes opened in surprise. She then covered her cutesy giggle with one of her hands. "No it wasn't, actually. Fortunately, for you and mummy, father would take these trips instead of me, of course not without worry. I remember him fretting over what will happen to me in the time he was gone. " Her expression soothed the more she talked about my father, it seemed she truly did love the man I understood so little about. In all honesty, I still don't know much about my mother, and I really only call her my mother because I am genetically hers, but I have yet to establish that connection with these parents. But this is rather nice, maybe if all of it is like this, I would love spending more time with these two? I don't exactly know what a familial bond is, for a matter of fact, any bond, but maybe I can learn through these two.

"It seems father is quite the hero." I replied after a short silence.

"Mhmmm. He truly is!" My mother nodded proudly, her eyes endearing as she looked ahead, the wind uplifting our hair. Speaking of my hair, it's rather overstayed its welcome, at least some of it has anyway. Maybe I should cut it soon? Or let it grow out unlike my old life? There's so much for me to do and experience with this new life, its overbearing.

Shortly after, we arrived at the small town roughly thirty minutes from our secluded home. It was small, so nothing incredible stood out as I have seen much grander in this world, yet it was certainly a breath of fresh air to the norm I've endured these past, almost, four years. The buildings were constructed of a mixture of wood and cobblestone neatly assorted to make comfortable living arrangements and the streets spread from the back end entrance, straight to the front entrance, a massive teeming market following along this street of course. Shops scattered around a close proximity ranging from dealing things such as weaponry, elixirs, armour, pharmaceuticals, etc.

"So mum, where are we off to first?" I asked the standard question.

"Well, I would like to complete our essential shopping first and then I was thinking we could go looking around shops you were interested in viewing. What do you think?"

"I think that would be most appropriate." I replied, smiling to my mother who returned the gesture.

We then proceeded wandering around in the pursuit of the necessary purchases, searching across a wide selection of shops and stalls, comparing prices to see what we could get for the lowest price available. The people's faces teemed with happiness and gratitude, something I didn't see all that often in the capital. Maybe the humble life of these people truly gave them value in their life and more appreciation for the things gifted to them or earned through labour. Across the capital it would be complaints from the youth, even the elders and adults who always sought perfection from others, but never from themselves. They had so much more, yet the people gathered here, scrambling through their money bags trying to find one bronze piece extra looked more content and more willing to help, lending small amounts to those in the direst of situations.

Laughter erupted from the crowd gathered, my mother innocently joining in the celebration of others and pulling me amongst the crowd delivering the culture directly towards me by investing me into it. The warmth, which spread like a disease, infested everyone's face in light pink splatters on their cheeks. The slowly falling snow that chilled even those in the thickest of cloaks, did not break the unfaltering rejoice booming in the market, even the spouts sounding more like teasing rather than actual arguments.

Yet, my physical body and my mental state seemed separated. In my vision, Ronny and I chattered to the people whilst moving along with our shopping, yet in my eyes, I stood from a distance gazing upon this scene, my clothes in tatters and blood sticking to the robes I donned as my feet trudged forward stomping across the flesh torn and seared at my feet.

"What are you doing, Milo?" He called out to me. "Your life awaits you here, so what are you doing over there? Your journey hasn't been completed and you know it. Don't put off something you can do today. Don't say I didn't warn you." The scene blowing away and the vivid imagery previously within the realms of existence, crumbled into ashes.

I rubbed my eyes harshly with one hand and had the other pressed against my head, which had been overcome by a dominating shrilling headache.

"Are you kay, Eli?" My mother looked worried at me, kneeling and sullying her clothes. I peered distantly at her.

"I'm alright. Let's keep moving."

After about another hour or so, we finally finished our shopping. My eyes had certainly wondered to certain establishments, yet nothing really caught my eye.

"So do you want to walk around any other shops, Eli?" My mother asked me, a heavy shopping bag digging into her frail hands as she spoke, leaving an unappealing red line.

"Here," I said, snatching the bag from my mother and hoisting it over my back, mana circulating through my body, "Also, there's no place that particularly spiked my curiosity so we can leave." I smiled up to my surprised expression.

"As you wish, my little one." She teasingly jabbed my arm and we set off, trudging through our previous imprints in the gathering snow. "Hey Eli, I know me and your father kind of just accepted your incredible intellect and mana manipulation prowess at such a tender age, but how is it that you can do that?"

I stopped for a second in my path, caught off guard by the sudden question. I scratched my head and continued walking. "Mum, have you heard of reincarnation?" I asked in a suggesting tone. I was conflicted if I wanted to tell her, but maybe I can open up slightly.

"Reincarnation? You mean in like myths and stories, where a person dies and get reborn as someone, or something else?"

"Yes." I replied swiftly, almost cutting her off.

"I have then. Are you telling me your a reincarnation? That would be ridiculous... until I was proven incorrect. Then it'd be fact. Are you trying to imply you're a reincarnation?"

The words paused on my lips, like they became stuck and my thoughts danced in a trance, replaying the image of my past self covered in blood and dismembered limbs. My heart raced more than from any thrill of battle I had ever received.

"Me? A r-reincarnation? No, mum. I was just curious if you knew what it was since I learnt about it recently." I attempted to cover up the topic and my secret, nerves and stutters impending my speech for the first time in both my life's.

My mum didn't pay attention to my features and instead looked off into the distance almost isolated, and smiled tenderly. "I see." Her words hung in the air between us that resulted in an uncomfortable silence that lasted an eternity. I had no idea what my mother thought, and I was intimidated by that fact. The possibility of my secret being revealed dawned on me visibly, my past self walking next to me slouch, with guts dripping from my unsheathed blade.

I don't know why I was so desperate to keep my secret, but some feeling I had yet to gain and experience rooted itself within me. Is this what's happening to me since being surrounded in a familial environment?

It's...so painful.

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