Calamity wasn't sure why she was dreading this, but she absolutely had to dig into the Curse of Loss to recover her memories. So she did her best to give herself perk talks. Calamity, you can do this. Calamity, it won't be that bad. Calamity, you need to do this. Calamity, hesitating isn't like you. Calamity, you're a goddamn brave woman, this challenge is nothing.

Those self-reassurances didn't help, so she just took the plunge and began pushing hard at the curse. It was like sinking into vile, deeply cursed molasses. Immediately, she felt a part of herself fighting against her. Yet she kept going. And going. And going. Only Relentless allowed her to keep going until she felt the curse abrade a little--

She did a curtsy in her latest dress then ran toward her parents to hug them, they were the best parents and they loved her and she was their precious little daughter and they were the best because after she said she was a girl not a boy they listened and they were the best because they were nice and they were the best because they were strong Adepts with cool jobs and... they were dead this was the last time she saw them before they went off and never came back.

She snapped out of the memory, tears running down her face. What? What happened to her parents? She reached into the curse to find out, but the thick muck of hidden memories felt more vicious than before and--

This memory is forbidden to you.

She staggered back onto her bed which she had been sitting on. Just what was that terrifying, horrible voice? Suddenly feeling unsafe, she pulled her favorite sword out of its hidden component in her jean jacket... what?

Blinking, Calamity stared at the blade she now held. It was a simple design, a long double-edged blade with a wavy patterning on the blade itself. The hilt wasn't particularly fancy, but it was comfortable and familiar in her hand. Confused, she took a few swings with it, ones that she realized felt like strikes she had long practiced to a point of near perfection.

[You have regained the Blade Word with the Cut, Conjure, Penetrate, and Beauty Sigils.]

Hey, Voice, what's up with me getting so many Sigils?

[It was your most well-developed Word, those Sigils are only a portion of what you had.]

Calamity just slumped further into her bed, burying her face in the kinda shitty pillow (at least it was better than the pillow in the last hotel). She'd been ready to dispel the mist covering her past, but it felt like all she'd gotten was more questions.

~~~

Calamity turned the sword over and over. "So apparently this was my favorite sword and I was pretty shining good with blades. Man, I wish I could swear, I just get weird phrases like that popping out if I try."

"I see," Mirn said, "Did you know some people frown on swearing around children? I just learned that today. They don't like children using swear words either. The teacher at the school joked about washing my mouth out."

"Don't get why it matters," Calamity said as she took another swig of monster apple hard cider. She felt like splurging on the stuff, okay? She needed a treat!

Mirn nodded. "All the monsters I know swear without any problems. Except you, but that's only because of your curse."

"So, how's school?" Calamity asked.

Mirn shrugged. "Alright. I like learning. Some of the kids are mean, but they suck anyways."

"Good on you for not letting it get you down." Calamity took just one more swig and realized she just emptied her cup with that swig. She refilled it.

Again, Mirn shrugged. "Those kids suck so I don't care about them. I made a couple of friends. I know you wanted me to."

"Excellent!" Calamity grinned.

Mirn tilted an eyestalk thoughtfully. "Grace's family's kids are fun, too. I think I understand why you wanted me to make more friends than just you."

"Tell me if you need me to kick that teacher's rear by the way," Calamity said.

Mirn shook their head. "He's alright. Pretty funny. I don't think he was that upset by me swearing, but he asked me not to do it again. Still don't get why, but I guess it's just one of those weird things people do. Like gender and not eating the dead. I don't mind not eating the dead, but I'm not going to do gender. I don't mind not swearing around that teacher."

"Ahaha, well, as a former human, I kinda get where they're coming from." Calamity laughed sheepishly. "I think part of the not eating corpses thing is because non-monster people can get sick from it, they don't have the ability to eat anything consequence-free like monsters! Also, there're whole funeral customs and you gotta respect that. And, well, part of it is it just feels weird particularly if it was someone you knew. Feel free to not bother with gender, though, just be sure to respect how other people want to be addressed!"

"I noticed other people don't eat as much as monsters do," Mirn said.

Calamity answered, "Yeah, monsters basically have bottomless stomaches, they can eat as much as they want and any extra beyond what you need to live daily goes toward evolution! Which is why all-you-can-eat restaurants usually restrict how many plates us monsters can get! Usually four plates. We're also banned from most eating contests, though there're monster-only ones where you compete to see how fast you can eat the food on your table."

"So other people have limits to how much they can eat?" Mirn asked.

With a nod, Calamity answered, "Yeah, however much can fit in their stomachs."

Mirn tilted their head. "That's a little sad."

Calamity shrugged. "Eh, they have lower food costs than us monsters, because they need less and the strength of the food source doesn't matter as much to them. They get nearly as much benefit from puny plain old cows as they do from direcows and the like."

"Oh. Anyways, I'm hungry." Mirn looked at Calamity inquiringly.

"It's about time to start dinner, yes!" Calamity said.

~~~

This memory is forbidden to you.

A couple of weeks had passed, and in that time Calamity had made only slow progress on the Curse of Loss, often being blocked by that voice. She managed to transform a few other curses while taking a break from tackling that curse. The Curse of Pain had become the Curse of Painful Jokes, making her more prone to such, the Curse of Overheating had become the Curse of Perpetual Heat, making her horny pretty much all the time, and the Curse of Passion had became the Curse of Innuendo, making her words more easily read as innuendo.

Overall annoying curses but better than random fits of pain, frequently feeling way too hot, and having her emotions randomly run out of control.

This memory is forbidden to you.

Progress with Grace was slow but steady; the monster smith was warming up to Calamity again and even was considering going on a date again. The combination of Calamity's three new curses tended to make Grace break into laughter regularly, which was kinda embarrassing. Mirn was doing well in school, catching up more and more to their peers at a quick pace. They were also rapidly picking up Sigils for their Adaptable Word and had earned the Spear Word and a few Sigils for that as well.

This memory is forbidden to you.

On the memory front, Calamity was becoming more used to hearing that particular message, to the point where it became more irritating than anything else, even if she felt a little anxious at the voice itself. She had managed to dig out some memories out of the quagmire, none of them clearing up the mystery of her assassination activity but painting a clearer idea of what kind of person she was before. Memories of drills with blades. Memories of partying with a fun bunch of rich kids called the Wild Boys. Memories of flirting and sleeping with others. A memory that she had to fight the forbidding voice for, of drinking with a bunch of monsters who jokingly gave her the title of honorary monster. She had gone to bed with one of them. Memories of her parents' home, though those were tinged with a little pain.

This memory is forbidden to you.

On the personal progress front, she had slowed down a little as she filled out the Sigils most easily obtained by her actions. Continue, tied to Relentless. Smash, Claw, and Fang, all tied to Blade. The latter two let her treat her natural weaponry as blades for the purpose of the Blade Word and its Sigils. And, slowly, she could feel her Sigils advancing toward the Transcendental level through practice and through labyrinth runs, though none of them were that close to transcending.

This memory is forbidden to you.

She had realized she both hated and loved the blade. The hatred seemed to be tied to the voice plaguing her attempts to regain her memories, but she loved the blade regardless because it was... fun. Particularly when she took unconventional, rebellious even, blade stances. But she could go further. A greater act of defiance. So she started holding her sword in her tentacles instead, and that felt great. Xxx would hate it. Who Xxx was, she couldn't figure out, that was just the thought that popped into her head whenever she grasped her blade with her tentacles. Like that, she drilled, rapidly figuring out how to work with that, earning the Iconoclast and Tentacle Sigils even.

...Was she actually a genius with blades or something?

This memory is forbidden to you.

Gods, she hated that voice. Shut up and go away and stop blocking memories! Well, she would just have to get strong enough to overpower it.