“I warned them.” Gel said simply, once the admittedly short battle was over. “Just like you asked. I said: ‘You don’t want this, you will get eaten.’ More than once, even!”

A crimson whip reached out over Sean’s back, landing atop the fallen lizardkin. The slime immediately began to consume his meal, clearly unperturbed over the entire affair. 

“I’m telling you, it’s like they wanted to get in our belly.” Gel continued, sounding almost as relieved at that fact as Sean had been in disbelief. “You even ran away, and they still chased us! I’ve never had food so dedicated to being eaten. If I had hands right now, I’d applaud them. Both on taste and on their– mmm…” 

Gel sent over the mental equivalent of a gulp followed by an expansive, pleased sigh. 

“--delivery.” The slime finished. 

Sean just shook his head, momentarily at a loss for words. He moved closer, allowing Gel the reach the slime needed to continue his meal. His meal of people, Sean reminded himself. 

That fact didn’t bother him as much as it should have. 

They had actually been all the way back inside the sewer system before Sean had even realized he had just slain three humans without any hesitation whatsoever. Granted, they had all been attacking Saren at the time, but the old Earth version of himself would have at least thought twice before skipping straight to murder. 

Would I have? They were tormenting him. Without pesky emotions cluttering up his judgement, Sean could be a little more honest with himself as a gelaton than he had been as a human. It was freeing, in a way. 

No, they were going to kill him. I knew that. Sean thought, before admitting to himself that what he would have done wouldn’t have changed. The only difference in this world was what he had been able to do about it. What we had been able to do about it.

He had never been the sort to just abandon a friend, and despite how unlikely it had seemed at first, Sean did view the owlen as a friend. Gel apparently did, too. After all, Saren had come to their aid before when the paladin had held no real cause to. It had only been right to return that particular favor, and neither of them had questioned it. 

If that had been the last of it, Sean might have dismissed this line of internal inquiry right there. There was little in the way of difference between ‘enlightened’ and monsters here, so far as he could tell. His instincts were already confused as to why this was even an issue. The gelaton could feel them welling up even now, urging him not to waste time on such thoughts. 

If we hadn’t run into you three, I wouldn’t be. Sean stared down at the trio of humanoids they had just slain, playing the scenes that had led up to the one-sided battle back in his mind. Was there something else he could have, or should have done?

Gel cut through his self-reflection, the slime’s tone forcibly relaxed in a way Sean immediately picked up on.

“I mean, here we are. Minding our own business. Chasing down rats and cleaning up their sewers for them. When they not only chase us and insult us, but they have the gall to attack first!” Gel waved his crimson whip around in the air dismissively, as if the slime couldn’t believe his own words. “I guess we can’t warn stupid away from being eaten, Sean. Some people are just determined to be consumed. Frankly, I admire their commitment–” 

The slime continued rambling on, and it was only another minute or two into the spiel that Sean realized what was going on. Gel was trying to make him feel better. 

He must have noticed how I was feeling through the bond. Sean kicked himself for worrying his friend. It’s not like they had hunted this group down. They had backed off, and given them every chance to do the same. They didn’t even try to show us the same courtesy. 

Internally, Sean’s pity well bottomed out for the three rapidly-melting meals. While most of that was aided by his own nature draining away the emotion of the moment, the gelaton decided he wouldn’t let this event change him. After all, it was self defense–

–and they came into our territory. Sean didn’t fight that last thought as it bubbled up from his instincts. Instead, he decided to move the conversation along. To show Gel he was back in the game. 

“You would think a group willing to go off like that would at least have been better fighters.” Sean quipped, squatting down to rifle through belongings left behind by the lizardkin, whose body was now –much like himself– nothing more than bone. “The real question though, is did they have anything worth taking?”

“Ooh, good point!” Gel said, the slime’s excited tone no longer sounded forced now that Sean was talking again. “I think I saw a potion pouch on his side, try that.” 

Eagerly, Sean did so. All of the potions they had found so far had been amazing, this one must be–

“It’s bright yellow.” Sean reported, pulling the small vial out of the leather pouch. “Sun-hued, almost. Like those health potions we saw back at the ant caverns. Only this one doesn’t have any dosage marks.”

Sean held it up for inspection, and a moment later Gel mumbled his own agreement through his food. 

“Hmm… must be a cheaper one if it’s only single-dose. It does look like the same shade.” Gel sent over the mental equivalent of a shrug, somehow making the expression feel as if the slime had a turkey leg poised in front of his mouth waiting for him to take a bite. “We can test it on Saren? Now that we have one again, I mean.”

The discovery that the glass, two-dose health potion they had held onto for so long had somehow cracked at some point and spilled precious potential health all over the inside of their pouch for it had not been a high moment for either of them. They had found it yesterday, and Gel had immediately sworn to slay every cactus in the immediate area after a spine had been found piercing through the pouch’s leather. In a way, it had helped them out. The materials from their subsequent cacti-purge had gone into the making of their sled. 

But with Saren delirious and dying, the pair had also lost their only way to heal the owlen. 

Until now. 

“Yeah, sure.” Sean said, standing up and striding over to the blood-and-grime covered paladin. The paladin whose injuries were so severe that Gel hadn’t even complained when Sean had moved him away from his final meal. 

Kneeling down, Sean flicked the cork of the glass vial free and lifted Saren’s head gently with his midnight hand. The limb resonated distantly at him before its presence faded in his mind altogether, perhaps aware that the gelaton intended to heal rather than slay this particular target. With his other hand, Sean poured the vial’s contents down Saren’s beak.

“You know, there are some life mana-based explosives out there, I think.” Gel said off-handedly, precisely the moment it was too late for Sean to take the action back. “Quite a few poisons too, if you can believe it.” 

“Poisons?” Sean couldn’t help himself from asking as he watched the owlen’s form intently for any change, his burning orbs blazing in the dark. “From life mana?” 

“Hey, I don’t know how it works.” Gel admitted freely. “I just know they exist. Or rather, Barry did.” 

Sean thought about that for a moment as the pair waited for the potion to take effect. Are those potions just giving ‘life’ to viruses and bacteria? Is that a thing, here? Because that is dark if so. 

Luckily, he was spared going any further down that particular rabbit hole as the pair watched Saren’s wounds begin to knit themselves together. In seconds, something like lucidity returned to the owlen’s fever-struck eyes. 

Looks like it was a health potion after all. Sean thought, gently laying the owlen’s head back down so the paladin wouldn’t wake up wondering if he was under attack. Not that he imagined Saren was in any shape to be casting spells right now, but the gelaton had no desire to be flung into whatever stone-like material made up the wall right now. 

He needn’t have worried. Saren’s eyes rolled groggily around his surroundings a few times, blue-fire reflecting off of them from the lanterns the slain group had dropped before the owlen shook himself suddenly and his gaze locked onto Sean’s own. 

“G-Gel?” The paladin managed to ask, right before he started hacking up blood. Sean backed up a step, giving the owlen some room. “H-how did–?”

“Health potion!” Gel responded brightly, indicating the vial in question– still in Sean’s left hand– with his crimson whip. “You can add the cost of it to our ongoing negotiations, Feathers. Along with our equivalent value for services rendered, of course. Swift rescue from certain death isn’t cheap, you know.” 

Saren barked out a grim, bloody laugh as he sat up. The motion must have been dizzying, because the owlen put one feathered hand to his head to steady himself– and possibly the room. 

“Where are–” 

“In the sewers!” Gel said cheerily, cutting off the paladin once more even as he simultaneously translated both sides of the conversation for Sean in real time. A service the gelaton was rather appreciative of, considering the circumstances. “We uh, took care of the ones attacking you. They won’t be trying that again anytime soon, I can promise you that!” 

Saren’s eyes flicked over towards the gear-pile heap of cloth, armor, bones, and barely visible weaponry that represented the last effects of the paladins who had attacked him. To Sean’s surprise, the owlen’s shoulders drooped at the news. Saren stared at the floor, and despite the obvious humanoid-owlkin emotional expression gap, it was easy for the gelaton to tell Feathers appeared depressed at the news. 

Why does that bother him? Sean wondered. Then, because they apparently had a second to talk he passed on a question of his own. “Those other three were all paladins, right? Ask him why he was attacked by three of his own order. We need to figure out if they’re going to keep coming for him–or us, now that we’ve helped him.” 

“Ooh, I hope so!” Gel thought back at him, even as the slime translated Sean’s questions. “Think of all the meat! And the mana!” 

And the experience. Sean added silently, his mind treating him to a mental image of the beam of light that had blasted through the trees back at the forest. Assuming they don’t just disintegrate us.

“It would seem,” Saren began, as yellow light suffused his hands and the owlen began to heal his remaining injuries. A fact Sean was grateful for, as it meant they could save any more health potions they came across to sell later. “That my order has forsaken me.” 

Sean’s intense stare at that little revelation must have made clear his desire for more information, because the owlen continued immediately even as he–rather stiffly– continued casting. 

“Some of them, at least. With clearance to act that must have come from the top.” Saren’s eyes flashed with anger as the owlen relived some memory of presumably whoever that individual was. “I will admit, I had hoped the oracle’s sight had not been so keen on this point… though I did not expect them to nearly kill me. Imprison me, sure. But this…”

Sean was beginning to have more questions than answers here, so he was glad when Gel spoke up for them when Saren’s eyes began to stare off into the distance. 

“This all sounds like fascinating intrigue, but it doesn’t really answer the question. What did you do? And more importantly, how tasty would you rate this ‘oracle’ individual on a scale from 1 to 10–” 

“Come on, Gel. You didn’t say that.” Sean interrupted his friend’s translation. Saren’s expression hadn’t changed from one of grief mixed with anger. “What’d you really ask him?”

“Who the oracle is, what he needs or wants us to do to keep him alive so we can keep buying things off of his contacts, and if all of this exposition is going to help him get us into the city.” Gel said cheerfully. “That last part is, admittedly, taking some creative liberties with the wording.” 

Sean resisted the urge to roll his orbs. Instead, he simply waited until Saren spoke up again. 

“The oracle is one of several leaders within the Gold Spire detachment here.” Saren explained. “He is also perhaps the most respected, despite being technically outranked by our commander.”

While the owlen’s tone had, at least to Sean, sounded almost mechanical, now his tone took on one of surprise. The still-healing paladin looked up at them as if not quite believing his own eyes. 

“Do you truly wish to aid me once more? Just like that? I cannot make assurances of safety for you. Not with things as they are now.” 

“We’re happy to help you get things to where they should be, provided you can make such assurances in the future.” Gel replied diplomatically, his tone taking on the practiced cadence of a merchant negotiating a potentially valuable deal. “Naturally, we have things we are after here as well.” 

Saren’s eyes slid from them, to the mostly-consumed, obviously humanoid bodies not far behind them. Sean held up a placating hand, knowing that whatever Gel said in response– the gesture would likely help.

“Now hold on, I know what this looks like– and I promise there is a very reasonable explanation for that!” Gel said, using almost exactly the same words he had used on that particular group before they had attacked. Luckily, this time it appeared to have more of an effect.

Instead of rising up in anger, Saren simply closed his eyes… and nodded. 

“I see… I trust you will provide it soon?” 

“We will. Basically, they wouldn’t retreat and even when we did retreat– they refused to take not getting eaten for an answer.” 

Again, instead of getting angry at them Saren merely nodded once more. Sean had expected more bluster out of a paladin, but it didn’t look like the owlen actually blamed them for a situation that clearly hadn’t been their fault. Which was a refreshing change of pace, given the events of the last twenty or so minutes. 

“I… see. I appreciate you at least giving them the chance.” Saren said after a moment, and Gel let out an impressed huff of vindication in Sean’s mind. 

“Hah! You see? That is how food doesn’t get eaten.” Gel said through their mental bond. “Respect. It’s how you become what’s not for dinner.” 

R-e-s-p-e-c-t. Find out what it– Sean shook his head. Now wasn’t the time to be singing, and the now-forsaken paladin before them had more to say. 

“What is it you are after within Dervash then, Gel?” Saren inquired, and neither of them missed the hint of steel that entered the owlen’s voice amidst his obvious exhaustion. “Knowing your goals may help me help you achieve them, after all.” 

And let him know whether he actually wants to keep working with us. Sean translated in his head, reading between those particular lines with no difficulty at all despite the language barrier. 

“More of what we traded you for, actually!” Gel said brightly, not even missing a beat. “Exotic meats. Spices. Recipes. Cookbooks, if we can find any. Maybe some armor? Definitely some new threads too, we are in dire need of fresh attire. Don’t let our current wardrobe fool you, we are working with what we have not with what we want to be working with. Going to need some new shoes, too… Oh, and maps.”

“Maps?” Sean didn’t miss how somehow, out of all of that, maps were the one thing Saren felt he needed to question. 

 “Yeah, maps. As many as we can get our hands on.” Gel said brightly. “It’s a big world out here, and we want to see it! Well, and eat it. But those goals go hand-in-ooze with one another, don’t you think?”

Saren’s eyes didn’t narrow, but Sean thought it was a near thing. Like the owlen couldn’t tell if Gel was joking or not. After a few breaths however, the paladin seemed to come to a decision. 

“Alright. If what you say is true, then… I believe we can work something out. It won’t be easy, though. Nor will anything I ask you for your assistance with be ‘safe’. Especially for one such as you.” Saren clearly thought that last warning meant something, but all Sean could see was the pair of them getting everything they wanted. 

First we get keys to the city sewers. Now we’ve got an inside birdadin on our side…

Sean’s attention unfocused from the conversation, his burning orbs staring back down the tunnel. The tunnel beyond which the city of Dervash– and all of its hidden treasures– awaited them, ripe for exploration.

We’re actually going to do this. Sean thought, marveling at the idea even as his excitement rose at the prospect of infiltrating his first-ever magical city as a literal monstrous fugitive. Now, all we have to do…

… is figure out how in the hell we’re not going to get caught.