The dreams had only grown crisper. The night air felt sharper against my skin, the cold moisture from falling snow seeped into my clothing. Most of all, the sounds of a city at night had gotten so bright and sharp that they dwarfed any music I’d heard in real life.

I bounced along the roofs, whistling along to Avaritia’s distant howls. They were gleeful and free, the kind ey made when there were no magical girls to stand in our way, when we could roam as gods and nothing in the world could stop us.

And, as I jumped so high I could steal the moon (were stealing not eir habit instead of mine), I could admit how much I longed for this. The day would never even offer me wings that I might burn myself by flying too close to the sun. But dreams would give me all the imitations I needed to glide through the night.

I was making my way to Avaritia, to raise my heart in chorus with eirs. And then, so quiet I almost missed it, I heard another song beneath me: faint and desperate, longing to be freed. I had to answer.

I perched on the corner of a building; watching a pair of shadows bickering with each other below. One was as pedestrian as any other, a flickering shade of confusion and doubt with a hint of wrath for spice. But the other! Oh, if only it could let that beautiful song ring free!

And what emotion it carried! She was trapped in another’s shadow, much as the waking me was trapped. And friendship and pride buried that desire deep in her heart, letting the sound bounce around and find resonance with itself until it begged to be let free. It was simply intolerable to let such music remain chained.

I didn’t deserve an angel’s wings, not when I hadn’t had the courage to tell anyone about these precious dreams. And yet, the waking me would not understand even this, would never help someone embrace their sin. Here, I could accept my own dejection. It was a dream, and as long as the silly little waking me insisted it was but a dream, I could allow my desire the fullness of its power.

I pierced my thumb with one fang, then slipped behind the woman for a moment and shoved a single drop of glistening sap into the songbird’s heart. Perhaps I should have felt guilty. I would hate a monster that forced me to cry out that bitterness deep inside where those I loved could hear. This was still but a dream, and you don’t have to feel guilty about what you do in dreams.

The droplet gave her what she needed, gave the song in her heart that little bit of strength it needed to crack through all those walls she’d built around the songbird in her heart and set herself free to sing. I returned to my perch, watching from an overhang as I waited for the shadow’s grand performance to begin.

My dear friends would stop her in the end; they were cruel like that. I could already hear Temperantia’s restrained melody coming closer. But, even once her performance reached its inevitable end, this songbird would still know she had sung, and perhaps that would free her from that cage she’d built. In this, we formed a cycle: vice and virtue, night and day, cruel honesty and softly spoken lies.

I loved Inessa like a sister, I really did; but, at least in my dreams I could admit something deeper than that, aching for its own voice. A problem easily solved.

---

I woke up with a start. The dreams weren’t going away. If I hadn’t checked and asked and verified that the details didn’t match up with what attacks were actually happening, I’d have started to get nervous. But they didn’t match, and often I dreamt even when there were no monster attacks, and so there was no point in worrying anyone.

It was more likely that I was just guilty that I had almost been made into a monster, and unable to accept the sad fact that the most I’d ever be able to do to help my friends was play the useless cheerleader on the side.

At least they’d allowed me that much in the aftermath of getting turned into kids. Once Inessa and Temperance had returned to normal, and I’d been able to help Inessa explain her disappearance to her parents, the last hesitation at letting me work as a magical girl support crew member had vanished and we’d spent a chunk of the weekend hashing things out over text.

I’d expected dad to be angry with me missing school, and he hadn’t been happy that they’d had to call him about my ‘irresponsibility.’ But he had always been uncomfortably enthusiastic about my relationship with Inessa, and he’d laughed off that at least he “didn’t have to worry about me being gay.” That didn’t stop him from warning me what might happen if I got caught skipping again though.

A part of me wanted to turn around and shove it in his face exactly how badly he misunderstood my best friend. But Inessa and I agreed that my dad topped the list of people absolutely not allowed to know that Inessa was a lesbian, as satisfying as the moment might have been.

Sighing, I rose to my feet and, verifying that dad’s door was closed, slipped into the bathroom. For a moment, I thought I saw Inessa in the mirror, but I shook my head and the apparition was gone. It was probably just my imagination. Granted, “it’s just my imagination” was also exactly what I had told myself that time Gula Shark had sent a ghost-themed Resinner to possess me, so it was probably better to ask the others if they could sense anything odd.

But it was probably just a lingering memory of a dream. I splashed some water on my face and set the matter aside for now. If I didn’t get ready fast enough, I might have to deal with dad, and I’d rather hurry than have that kind of morning.

I ended up waiting for several minutes outside of Inessa’s house before my friend emerged, trying to brush her hair as she walked. It was unusual to see Inessa unprepared to face the day. Defying lead magical girl stereotypes, she was a morning person.

“Long night?” I asked.

Inessa gave me a tired nod, “Kopier Kat was, ugh, well at least it wasn’t—”

“Fidget Spinner?” I cut her off. I’d heard the name a few times so far, exclusively in this context. Inessa shuddered, then nodded. “What was the deal with that one anyway.”

“C,” Inessa turned to stare at me very seriously, “we don’t talk about that thing; we don’t think about it; we do not acknowledge that it ever existed.”

Naturally, that just meant I had to get the story one way or another someday. Were it actually sad or scary, Inessa wouldn’t have reacted anywhere near so melodramatically. so the fact that none of the Saints would mention any details meant that it had to be deeply embarrassing.

I took her bag as we walked, allowing her to do her best to get her hair into something resembling presentable shape before we reached school.

“Everything went okay in the end though?

“Of course!” Inessa grinned, “We’re amazing like that. You don’t need to worry C, we’ll keep you safe and sound.”

I managed a smile in return, as much as the reminder of my own inability to protect myself without outside assistance didn’t exactly fill me with warm happy feelings.

“It was good practice actually, thinking back on it” Inessa mused.

“Good practice?”

Inessa nodded seriously, “It kept copying and reflecting our attacks like, well, a version of her almost. Except this one was a giant humanoid tiger with a microphone and not my evil twin.”

“How’d you win,” I asked. This was good. The monster in my dreams had sung, but it had been bird themed. It was still just a lovely if weirdly persistent dream and I didn’t need to tell anyone about it.

“Well, it had us on the ropes at first, but then Ida stopped using any of her big attacks and caught it in close combat. Once she knocked it off balance, Temperance knocked it into the air and then Castitas! Flare! Barrage!!!” she barely refrained from posing or shouting when she announced the attack name, “right to the chest.”

That sounded promising. It could only be a good thing if Ida and the others were finally developing tactics to take the upper hand from their newest antagonist. Besides, imitating the others sounded like a really amazing power; it was relieving to hear that Inessa and company could find a way around it.

“That’s our Ida,” I nodded along to the story, “Reliable as ever.”

Inessa’s head bobbed up and down enthusiastically, as if she was the one who’d been praised.

“And she’s finally getting more than 3 hours of sleep a night again! Whatever happened between you two during that incident must have really given her some perspective.”

I started to note that nothing much had happened and any progress she’d made was almost certainly entirely Ida’s doing, but I caught myself just in time.

“Incident? Which one is that?”

Inessa stamped her foot, “You know which one!”

“No, no, there have been so many,” even Temperance would have turned feral at my grin.

“Hmph!” Inessa stuck her tongue out at me.

“How—” I started, smirking at her.

“Don’t you dare,” Inessa’s eyes narrowed.

“—childish of you,” I finished, sticking my tongue out at her.

Inessa growled at me, then grabbing her bag, proceeded to dash ahead toward school. I wasn’t sure if fighting monsters was simply great exercise or becoming a magical girl had just made her superhuman in other ways, but she had no trouble leaving me in the dust.

At least, I assumed so until I saw her frozen, hiding ineffectually behind a lamp post as she stared at Lupin.

“Inessa, dear, this is a little stalkery,” I noted somberly. “We may need to have you taken in for a few questions.”

She did not respond. I tapped her on the shoulder. She started, then stared at me.

“C!” she whispered urgently, “perfect, walk into school with me so Lupin will come talk to us together!”

“Inessa….” I offered sadly, “have you considered just talking to her like a normal person?”

“No,” she grabbed my hand and began to walk purposively past Lupin, “don’t ask stupid questions.”

“Good morning C!” Lupin practically jumped on me. “Here, take this,” and shoved a square of slightly burnt iridescent fabric into my hands.

Inessa bit her lip in jealousy, so I thanked Lupin and pocketed the item instead of asking any of the hundred questions this whole exchange had prompted.

“It’s okay Inessa,” I smiled at her, “this kind of thing, well, a child just wouldn’t understand.”

Inessa’s mouth dropped open and she tried to form words and failed. I gave her a smirk and my childhood friend glared at me in a way that promised revenge.

Lupin stared at Inessa for a few moments as she slowly lost the battle not to dissolve into a fit of giggles. I had no idea why she, the one person here who wasn’t in on the joke, had that kind of reaction.

Inessa looked to Lupin, then back to me. I started to speak and saw, too late, that the mock anger had fled from her face in favor of something a lot more genuinely hurt.

“Inessa,” I looked at her, trying to apologize.

Inessa’s shoulders trembled a bit as she wordlessly turned and made her way into the school.

Fumbling, I mumbled a quick goodbye to Lupin, then dashed after Inessa. She ignored me; I probably deserved that.

---

I spent the rest of the morning classes going over what had happened again and again. I hadn’t meant to be mean. I’d just felt glad to finally be in on one of the group’s in-jokes to the point that I hadn’t realized that saying that in front of Lupin it would be different.

But that wasn’t an excuse, not really. Insulting Inessa in front of the girl she liked was a low blow, something I should have known better than to do if I wasn’t just a big ugly insensitive lug who couldn’t keep his foot out of his mouth to save his life. And besides, whatever excuse or motivation I could construct after the fact, I’d hurt Inessa.

So I grabbed a square of lukewarm cafeteria pizza and stumbled toward the usual spot, rehearsing what I had to say to Inessa for the hundredth time.

“Hey,” I greeted everyone, earning a hi from Ida and a nod from Temperance. I winced, Temperance hadn’t told me she was transgender and I’d accidentally pushed her into revealing that when she wasn’t in her right mind. I owed apologies there too.

More importantly, Inessa didn’t say anything and, in fact, made a point of looking away from me.

“Umm, Inessa,” I knew what I had to say. I’d gone over it enough that I couldn’t really mess it up.

She did not respond.

“I just wanted to say that I’m really sorry for earlier!” Slowly, Inessa’s gaze swung to face me, but her mouth remained pressed in a thin line.

“I really shouldn’t have said that and you’re not childish. If anything, I’m the childish one who can’t do anything. You’re really great. I admire you a lot actually and I really shouldn’t have joked like that around Lupin as hard as it is for you to talk to her.”

A small smile worked its way across Inessa’s face before turning into a blush. “H-hey! I’m not that bad!” she flailed.

“And, umm, if there’s anything I can do to make it up to you, please let me know. Again, I’m so so sorry, you shouldn’t have to do anything so if you want me to go hang out somewhere else or something, that’s okay and…”

“C!” Inessa cut me off, looking a lot more alarmed, “It’s okay! I’m not really that angry. Look, I was a little hurt that you just said that in front of Lupin like that, but it’s not like it was on purpose or anything and you don’t have to make it up to me and we definitely don’t want you to leave!”

Ida and Temperance glanced at each other, then both turned away to let us work this out.

I took a deep breath as Inessa slipped around the table and hugged me. "Honestly, it’s really just sweet that you’re taking the whole apology so seriously when it wasn’t a big deal.”

“But,” I hesitated. With anyone else it wouldn’t have been. But I know how much Inessa struggled to approach Lupin and, even with Lupin suddenly deciding she was my best pal, Inessa had worked a long time to work up the courage to do more than completely freeze around her crush and I had probably set that back weeks.

“Look,” Inessa grinned, “If you’re so desperate to apologize, then I have a secret incredibly important project only you, Lupin’s actual friend, could help me with, so do that and we’ll call it even.”

“You don’t have to humor me,” I mumbled balefully.

“I’m not humoring you! This is a big deal considering the date, and your help will be huge here!” Inessa grinned, “Honestly, I was worried about how I would bully you into helping, but now we’ve solved that problem.”

“I’d have helped anyway,” I muttered stubbornly, but sighed under the weight of Inessa’s gaze, “but okay, if you’re sure that’s enough.”

Inessa gave me a thumbs up, “of course, like I said, no big deal.”

Ida looked at us both, “You two are very silly you know.”

“Cavity inducing,” Temperance pronounced with all customary apathy.

Inessa pouted at the two, “What does that mean!?”

“What she said!” I followed up.

Ida and Temperance glanced at each other, and then said nothing.

“H-hey!” Inessa looked between the two.

“Umm, actually, while we’re still doing apologies, I needed to talk to you Temperance if that’s okay.” I winced. That was a particularly awkward transition, even for me.

She tilted her head curiously at me, “sure.” was all she said.

I winced, “Umm, out in the hall maybe?”

“Okay,” Temperance stood, “that worked well last time.”

I nearly tripped over my own feet at that, and Temperance allowed herself a small giggle, but she did follow me out into the mostly empty hall, and then—factoring in that reminder—into an actually empty classroom next to the cafeteria.

“Umm,” I hesitated. I’d been planning this of course, but I’d been so caught up on dealing with Inessa that I hadn’t thought this one out much. “I guess, umm, you kinda, accidentally mentioned you were transgender during the whole incident on Friday.”

Temperance silently tilted her head to the side, a lion lazily waiting for its prey to come even closer.

“And, umm, I realized it wasn’t good to get that knowledge from you while you weren’t really in your right mind.”

“Oh,” Temperance said nothing else for a while. “It’s not a secret or anything.”

“R-really?” I asked.

“I’m in the GSA,” she said, slowly enunciating every letter in the acronym.

I couldn’t believe it. Temperance actually voluntarily engaged in extracurricular activities!?

“But,” she considered, “if you’re determined to make it up to me too, something could be arranged.”

“I’m going back to the others!” I smiled cheerfully at her and ignored the obvious bait. In a way, that joke had done a lot more than Inessa’s overeager dismissal to assure me that things were okay between us.

“Actually,” I hesitated at the door, “W-what’s it like being transgender anyway?”

Temperance closed her eyes and ignored me, for long enough that I thought I was being dismissed, before she spoke.

“It’s like learning how to want without hating yourself for wanting.” She tapped her index finger against her lips in thought a few times, before speaking again. “Like, abandoning thoughts about what you can do and just becoming.”

“Oh,” I said. “That sounds nice.” I didn’t really understand what Temperance meant. That was only fair; I wasn’t the transgender girl in the room. Even so, it sounded nice enough to burn.

---

“Allow me to explain our mission!” Inessa declared after her mom had departed with a reminder that she’d pick us up around 6, “But first C, do you know what day it is?”

“Monday?” I responded, bewildered. We were walking through the mall parking lot, facing the large stone edifice that had no doubt been a place people actually went once a long time ago back when the boomers were young.

“C, C, C,” Inessa sighed dramatically. “Today is February 12th!” She looked at me expectantly.

“Yes,” I agreed, “that does seem to be the case.”

“Chocolate!” Inessa declared, “Today is the day to buy chocolate! And you are going to help, even if you don’t have a romantic bone in your body!”

“Hey!” I snapped, “I’m not that dense!”

My dearest childhood friend merely sighed and shook her head.

“Anyway,” I mock-glared at her, “you want to buy something you can give to Lupin on Wednesday, right?”

That mention was all it took, Inessa’s face turned red and she froze before shyly bobbing her head up and down.

“And that'll really make up for this morning?” I paused just inside the automatic doors, waiting for Inessa to follow.

“C!” that snapped her out of her crush induced catatonia, “I’ve already said it’s fine!”

But it didn’t feel fine, and this wasn’t a real favor. I wasn’t actually doing anything for her I wouldn’t have jumped at doing anyway. Except, if I really said that, it would make the apology more about me than her, and that would just be selfish.

“Okay, but, are you sure you’re going to be able to give it to her?”

Inessa frowned. “I think I have to,” she admitted at last. “Like, when I became Castitas, it was the resolve to face my feelings wholeheartedly instead of trying to run from away from my own desires, to face things sincerely you know? Even if she hates me, I can't just stand still.”

I honestly couldn’t say I understood how Inessa embracing her inner lesbian equated to chastity in any substantive sense, but it made sense to her and besides, Inessa managing to overcome her own weaknesses yet again was nothing if not inspirational. As her friend, how couldn’t I cheer her on as she once again proved what a chasm there was between us.

“I do not get what that has to do with being a saint and/or fire or chastity, but that’s pretty amazing you know?”

Inessa grinned, “Right, it’s rare that you admit how amazing I am!”

Her sense of purpose restored, and her obvious anxieties temporarily pushed to the wayside, Inessa had no trouble marching through the largely empty mall toward a surprisingly crowded chocolate shop. Valentine’s Day seemed to trump the fact that no sane person had visited a mall in the last decade.

She glanced around the pastel counters and took in the smell of sugar permeating the air before pushing through the crowds toward a large display of heart-shaped boxes advertising Valentine's sales.

“Now C,” she turned to face me holding two small heart-shaped boxes, “coconut milk chocolate or dark chocolate with macadamia nuts?”

I pondered. The answer was obvious really. I smiled brightly at Inessa.

“No clue.” I told her.

She pouted at me, “You’re her friend, you should know these things!”

I wondered about that. Sure, Lupin was friendly, but I’d hardly ever hung out with her really, with all the things I was gradually getting pulled into. At most, we really greeted each other at school. And yet, some little part of me felt like I knew them so much better than that. Like we understood and trusted each other on some deeper level. And yet…

“I have no clue what kind of food she likes.”

Inessa sighed, then imperiously waved me away and returned to her considering.

“Sorry,” I muttered. Inessa—lost in indecision—didn’t notice.

I drifted away and began to wander the store. I felt bad, I really did. I’d hurt Inessa’s chances with Lupin this morning. Or rather, I didn’t actually think Lupin would remember what happened. She was the type to laugh easily and rage easily, not that I’d actually seen her angry, but not the type to really care about that kind of thing, as much as it might move her in the moment. Inessa wouldn’t usually let something like getting laughed at drag her down either.

But, Lupin was a weak spot of Inessa’s, someone she wanted yet feared to approach. And because she hadn’t approached Lupin, that little crush of hers had grown into a bit of an obsession. Lupin talking to me, being my friend, had ultimately helped Inessa get enough exposure that she was working through that, but… Even a little bit could hurt, and it was obvious she’d been thinking about Valentine’s Day since before I messed things up, working up her courage to try something bit by bit.

I sympathized with her and admired her deeply for it. And I owed it to her to help somehow, except, I had no clue what kind of chocolate Lupin would like, or if she even liked chocolate at all.

My eyes drifted around the displays as I did my best to ignore the push of bodies in the store. And then I saw it. It was perfect.

“Inessa!” I grabbed a box and started searching for the girl. Luckily, bright red hair wasn’t hard to spot and the store wasn’t that large.

“What is it?” she asked curiously.

I handed her the box. She looked it over confused. “Okay, it’s definitely Lupinish, but it’s not really romantic is it?” she asked eventually.

“No, no, you’re thinking about this all wrong,” I grinned at her. “Look, if you got something big and hearts that said ‘I LOVE YOU’ in giant letters, could you really give it to her?”

Inessa hesitated, then nodded.

I stared at her silently.

Her shoulders slumped.

“Exactly!” I said, “and this isn’t romantic!”

I held up the little tin proudly. Even if it was small and inexpensive, it was still chocolate and that meant it could get the point across. It was also skull-shaped, and the chocolates inside looked to be as well.

“But,” I continued, “even if the chocolate itself isn’t romantic, obviously Valentine's Day is. So, no matter what chocolate you give her, the meaning will still come across.”

She nodded thoughtfully.

“And,” I delivered the masterstroke, “As you so expertly pointed out Miss Brandt, the one thing everyone knows about Lupin is that she’s a massive goth. It doesn’t matter if she likes dark chocolate, she’ll appreciate the skull aesthetic.”

Inessa clapped.

“Sold!!” she said at last, “you really are good at this kinda thing, you know?”

I sagged in relief. This would work. I’d helped and now the big part would be up to Inessa. As gifts went, this wouldn’t be a big one. But it could still be a step tying Lupin and Inessa closer together. From there, it wasn’t hard to see how they could be friends and, honestly, they’d make a good couple, even if it meant that they’d both probably spend a little less time with me.

Besides, it wasn’t hard to picture Lupin joining the Saints. Sure, she said she was greedy, but I knew she was a nice person at heart. She definitely had the confidence and grace to know exactly what to do with herself during a monster attack. It wasn’t hard at all to picture her in a Saint’s uniform.

And, with four virtues left to fill, the Saints deserved all the capable help they could get.

NEXT WEEK ON SHINING VIRTUE ANGELIC HEART!!!

When Charlie succumbs to Lupin’s puppy-dog eyes and agrees to skip school and hang out at the mall, Inessa makes the hasty decision to follow them in secret against her better judgment. But what’s this? A monster attack spirals into a confrontation with Avaritia that leaves Inessa’s friend in danger?!

Tune in for Episode 20: Could This Be a Date?! Inessa Brandt’s Day Off