“Hey Sonic,” said Ulala and waved her hand in front of Sonic’s eyes.

 

“Oh yeah, you said something” Sonic shook his head.

 

“You okay? You zoned out and had this thousand-yard stare”

 

“I’m fine. I just remembered some things. Can you repeat your question?”

 

“What happened to you in the years after ‘Sonic 06’?”

 

“You know what”, Sonic sighed, “Can we talk about something else, I don’t want to go into that”

 

“It’s fine, we don’t need to talk about that”, Ulala said with a smile, but inside she was disappointed. She wanted to hear some juicy drama about his break up with Amy, but she had to give up on it.

 

Ulala took out a cigarette, “Well anyways what are you doing now in life”, she said as she lit her cigarette.

 

“Right now I am working at a shitty job, but only temporarily.” Sonic said with optimism. “I am waiting for SEGA to call me for my next game. I’ve been drawing concept art for my new game I have this draft for a script that I think is great, I already drew level design ideas it's going to be great. You could say I am on stand-by until I start directing and designing my next game!”

 

“Why would they call you?” Ulala looked a bit confused

 

“What do you mean why would they call me? I am Sonic the Hedgehog!”

 

“How long has it been since your last game?”

 

“I am not sure, it’s been years”

 

“You do realize that it's entirely possible that they may never call you again?”

 

Sonic felt insulted, What the hell is she talking about? I may be down right now but my name still carries weight. “What are you talking about?”

 

Ulala puffed on her cigarette and said “I am just telling you realistically, there is no guarantee that you will get another game to make. They may call you and they may not. Depending on their market projections they may decide that your franchise isn’t worth continuing”

 

“That’s impossible!”

 

“Why are you so sure that it's impossible, it can happen to everybody. I am not saying that I am nearly as successful as you, but I made two games, I thought I had more to go and I had more spark in me than just two games. However, that was that. Yes, they called me to do those crossover games but I never got a chance to be a director again. Just because you used to make them money doesn’t mean that they think you should keep going forever.

 

“I am not trying to put you down or crush your hopes. I am just saying this as someone that used to hold out hope that I would get called again. I used to dream of a new game, new me, but as the years went along and that never came. I was very depressed but I came to the realization that life moves on and the industry moved on from me.

 

“Did you know that they ended up making another ‘Space Channel 5’ game in 2020? Some kind of VR game but they made it without me. SEGA hired a young actress to fill my role I was too old at that point to play my role. It can be very unhealthy to cling to this idea that I am surely getting another chance, maybe you are, maybe you aren’t. You should try to find something right now that you can build towards.

 

Sonic lowered his head feeling almost defeated even though this wasn’t a battle. It was like someone had poured cold water onto his face. Ulala’s expression turned into one of embarrassment, she quickly changed her tone in an effort to be less aggressive and said:

 

“I'm sorry, I'm preaching a bit but like I said I've been in your situation, and I'm trying to give some advice. To conclude what I've been saying, you shouldn’t hold onto the premise that they will call you at some point. Anything is possible but if they never call you, it just means a chapter in life has closed and that’s okay too. You can’t keep doing the same things you were doing when you were young when you get old. Aging is okay we just have to accept it.”

 

Before he could fully digest what he had been told his phone started ringing. He picked up his phone, answered the call and said hello.

 

“Listen I finally fixed the car and I’m on my way. I will be there soon wait for me at the Smile Burger” Tails said on the other end of the call.

 

“Okay, I will wait for you there.” Sonic ended the phone call, told Ulala a quick goodbye and left money for the coffee he ordered.

 

Slowly he walked back to the Smile Burger, outside it was still raining. He didn’t have an umbrella, but he didn’t mind getting a little wet from the rain. Once he got there, he found a place where he could hide from the rain while he waited for Tails. While he waited, he thought about everything Ulala had said to him.

 

It wasn’t long before Tails arrived, he parked the red Saab 900 and exited the car. Sonic approached him and said

 

“Why did you get out of the car?”

 

“Listen I fixed the main issue with the car but I just can't get the passenger door open. You will need to get in through the driver’s seat.”

 

The red Saab 900 had seats for up to 5 people but only two doors. With one door now unable to open, any passenger would have to ride in the back and could enter through the now-only functional door.

 

With that Sonic sat in the back, Tails sat to drive and they were on their way home. During the drive, Sonic was completely silent and was looking through the window. He was still thinking about his talk with Ulala. 

 

“What’s got you thinking?” said Tails, looking at Sonic through the rearview mirror.

 

“You know who I ran into today? Do you remember Ulala?” 

 

“The Dreamcast rhythm game?” Tails said squinting his eyes trying to remember.

 

“Yeah, that’s the one. She pissed me off. Some washed-up singer giving me lectures.” Sonic said and started looking back at Tails through the rearview mirror.

 

“What did she say?”

 

“She is just jealous her career ended after two games. She told me to give up my dreams because she gave up on hers and that made her feel better. I'll take your advice when you make more than two games.” Sonic crossed his arms in frustration, still looking out of the window.

 

“Mhm,” Tails nodded and didn’t say anything. He had a feeling that wasn’t exactly what she had told Sonic. 

 

Tails thought she probably said something bad about ‘Sonic games’ and that was what made him upset. Sonic never kindly took criticism. Since Tails wasn’t present for the conversation, it was best just to let Sonic vent and move on to something else.

 

“By the way, today is Friday!” Tails said with excitement.

 

“I know, the best day of the week,” Sonic said and his mood already improved. “Who is the guest tonight?”

 

“I don’t know I haven’t checked”

 

“It doesn’t matter, whoever it is Rick Ravette always makes it interesting to listen to.”

 

“You know I never could have imagined his show would be going on for that long. You’d think he would have run out of steam at this point.”

 

Sonic and Tails continued to chat until they got home. Since they started living together, they had two rituals they always did together. One, every morning had to start with coffee and watching ‘Good Morning Tokyo’ together. Two, watching tonight with Rick Ravette every Friday evening. 

 

These rituals became very important to the two. It was time they spent together having fun, laughing and discussing. For Sonic it provided an escape from his realty of working his horrible job. For Tails they were brakes in between endless study sessions. They both greatly enjoyed each other’s company.

 

Even though the show is American, it airs on Thursday night in America and gets a rerun on Japanese television on Friday night. Over the years, it has become more popular in Japan than in the US. The reason for this isn’t clear but the show has in turn become very Japanese-centric.

 

*** 

 

The sun had set and Sonic and Tails were in their apartment. Soon Rick Ravette would start, and the two of them got comfortable on the couch and had snacks prepared.

 

The show began and Rick was on the screen. He hadn’t changed that much from the 2000s. He had a few more wrinkles on his face and a few gray hairs he didn’t have before. He also still wore the same suits and had the same mustache. 

 

The first part of the show was always Rick telling a few jokes, like a little stand-up performance. Sonic and Tails laughed out loud at a few jokes. For the next part, it was time to announce the guest.

 

“Good evening ladies and gentlemen, tonight’s guest is a stranger to no one. A legend in the video game industry, director of one of the most well-regarded video game franchises, formerly a criminal now a force for good, give it up for Kiryu Kazuma!”

 

Kiryu entered the stage, he was wearing his iconic white suit. Sonic up until this point was in a good mood but that quickly changed once he had heard the guest's name and his face turned pale.

 

Rick went on to interview Kiryu. They sat across from each other and most of the interview was centered around the new ’Yakuza’ game Kiryu appears in.

 

“So Kiryu you don’t direct or write the games anymore?” said Rick.

 

“I am now just an actor in these games. I haven’t been in the director’s chair since ‘Yakuza 6(2016).” said Kiryu.

 

“Tell me why is that?”

 

“These games have been about my journey, the lessons I’ve learned, and trying to leave the player with some kind of message. I’ve lived a very colorful life as most players of my games can tell but I also felt like I don’t want to do this forever. There comes a point when you’ve fought your last fight.”

 

“You’re saying you got tired?”

 

“Kind of. While these stories are mostly autobiographical, I wanted them to have closure and I wanted to give the fictional Kiryu I play in the games an ending. I've accomplished that with ‘Yakuza 6(2016)’ and I’m happy I was able to do that. I’ve said everything I wanted to say in the series, some things maybe multiple times.”

 

The crowd chuckled and Kiryu continued to talk.

 

“I felt like it was a good moment to stop there and so, I did. So many stories endlessly go on and on, I didn’t want that to become of me. Life doesn’t go on forever after all.”

 

“You may have wanted the fictional Kiryu to have an ending but SEGA keeps bringing you back to cameo or to star in them. How do you feel about that?” said Rick while adjusting his seat.

 

“Honestly I am not happy at all. Back in 2016. I wanted that to be the last time I appear in any video game ever. However, the contract I signed says they can call me back for whatever reason they see fit. I’m not too angry about it, I do get paid very handsomely every time. SEGA can keep making up reasons for fictional Kiryu to return from retirement but in my heart, I was able to retire him in ‘Yakuza 6(2016)’ and they can never take that away from me.” Kiryu gave a soft smile.

 

“So you would never direct or write a game ever again, even if someone else was the main star?”

 

“No. I have expressed everything I wanted to express as both director and writer.”

 

“What do you now?”

 

“I run an orphanage. I think I feel really fulfilled being a father, especially to those who never had one. I've had a tough life and I know how hard it is to grow up without parents. You always feel lonely and disconnected even when surrounded by other people. I am trying to provide to those kids the life they deserve, the love and safety every child deserves.”

 

Rick shuffled his papers and asked, “Are you happy where you are right now?”

 

“I think I have never been happier. Players of ‘Yakuza 3(2009)’ will remember that I was the happiest when I started an orphanage. I always wanted to keep running the orphanage but my past kept getting in the way of that. Now I can finally do what I always wanted and with these appearances in new ‘Yakuza’ games I have infinite money to keep the orphanage well-funded.”

 

“Do you have any regrets?” Rick’s expression became more serious.

 

“I live with many regrets. There are plenty of things I wish I would have done differently. Most of my life has been trying to fix the mistakes I’ve made and atoning for my past as a Yakuza. Most of all I wish I was able to beat fate and save a friend, but we can’t turn back time. We have to keep moving forward.”

 

“Speaking of friends, do you keep up with Majima and the rest?” Rick changed to a more lighthearted tone.

 

“We don’t see each other all the time but all of us are still very close friends.”

 

“Finally, I have to ask, did the substories actually happen?”

 

The crowd burst into laughter and Kiryu laughed along. “Some of them were made up to give the games a bit of pizazz, but most of them did happen.”

 

“There you have it ladies and gentlemen. The legend himself Kazuma Kiryu. Tune in next week, we won't be having a guest. Instead, I am very happy to announce that I will be making my own movie and we will have an opportunity to talk about it.”

 

Kiryu extended his hand to Rick and said, “I wish you success on your film debut”, Rick shook hands with Kiryu and the show ended.

 

Sonic fell into a state of depression after the show. He just sat staring at the TV screen in silence. 

 

Tails asked him, “Are you okay?” in a deeply concerned tone.

 

“I’m fine, I am just gonna go to the balcony for a smoke if that’s okay”

 

Sonic went to the balcony, lit his cigarette, and looked up at the night sky. The rain had ended some time ago and the sky was completely clear. He turned his gaze from the sky to the city. Tails’ apartment was on the 18th floor, it had a very nice view of Tokyo. A sea of buildings seemed to stretch on forever. Sonic began to contemplate in his head.

 

Kiryu is the literal antithesis of everything I am and was. The new face of SEGA. The games he made were all great, and all of them were reviewed highly. He hasn’t lost his entire wealth. He hasn’t screwed up his relationships, he is happy. He knew when it was time to quit, even with that he still enjoys a successful career. He is well respected, and he didn’t let the success destroy him.

 

What Ulala said earlier to me, maybe she is right. Maybe I should just give up on the dream. Maybe I don’t have it in me, and the industry just doesn’t want me anymore. But what do I do? I don’t want to work at Smile Burger anymore, but where can I go at this point? 

 

I am clinging on to the dream of a return and I don’t think I can let go of it. It’s the thing that helps me get through the day, it's what helps me get through the morning. It’s the thing that gives me meaning. What am I waking up for without that dream? I don’t know. I honestly have almost nothing to live for.

 

As sad as that sounds, it is true. What do I even want to do with my life at this point? Ulala can be a voice coach, ‘cause she can sing. She started a family. I can't run fast anymore, I haven’t run fast in real life since the 1980s. I can't start a family, Amy is long gone. I don’t have something to build like the orphanage that Kiryu has.

 

I haven’t done any meaningful hero stuff since Robotnik. Kiryu never stopped trying to help people even with the wealth, the success, the games, and everything else. I spat on the faces of all the people just cause I could at the time. I hate myself. I am terrible, worthless, nothing I ever did amounted to anything.

 

Looking at Tokyo and seeing the near infinite skyscrapers, the small squares of light coming from all of the windows. I wonder how are they doing. Are these people’s lives any better? Do they have their lives put together? Are they living for something? Do they also have unattainable dreams? Are they happy with themselves?

 

Tails joined Sonic on the balcony and interrupted his thoughts.

 

“What’s got you thinking?” said Tails.

 

“I don’t know what I am going to do with my life,” Sonic said sounding very depressed.

 

“In what sense?”

 

“Every day I wake up thinking that soon SEGA will call me and I will get another game to direct”

 

“I know, you talk about all your ideas and concepts all of the time”

 

Sonic puffed on his cigarette and said, “I sleepwalk through my work, I obsessively about directing games and I may never get another chance to do it. What if I’m a spent mascot and it's over? SEGA hasn’t called me in years.”

 

“Is that what Ulala talked to you about?”

 

“Yeah, and I’ve been thinking about it the whole day.”

 

Tails proudly congratulated himself in his head for figuring out that Sonic wasn’t honest about what Ulala said to him.

 

Sonic put out his cigarette and continued, “This interview we watched with Kiryu today hit me hard. Objectively he is the new face of SEGA. Am I like Ulala or Ristar, a mascot of a dead franchise? Thinking about it I just can't be content with the idea that I’ve made my last game.”

 

“Why is it so bad if you made your last game?” Tails said trying to be understanding and empathetic.

 

“I just can’t accept that my legacy is going to be terrible. I will go down in history as a great artist, instead someone to be laughed at. I want to prove to the world that I can still make a 10/10 game. That I've still got it in me. I have made games that did get good reviews like ‘Sonic Generations(2011)’ but that isn’t really a classic. I have to make one more classic before I can let it go. Kiryu was smart to stop before he tarnished his franchise.”

 

Tails put his palms together and said very gently, “Have you thought about what are you going to do if there are no more ‘Sonic games’? I am not the franchise is dead but let’s say in a scenario that you don’t get another chance. What would you do?”

 

“I have been thinking about that too. I don’t know. There isn’t an option for me to explore that. I have to get up every morning and go to that shitty Smile Burger, I don’t have any real opportunities to work besides other minimum wage jobs. What can I even put on my CV? I stopped a mad scientist once upon a time and a former game director. What use has anyone for that? Who would want to employ me?

 

“Better yet even if I had the option to choose whatever field or place to work I don’t know what I would choose. What am I passionate about other than video games? Is there even anything out there I would enjoy? Is there any work I would find fulfilling? Maybe it's even useless to think about because I won't be able to leave the job I am at right now.”

 

Tails stood silent for a bit and said, “I’m sorry, I’m not sure what to say. I can’t give you an answer, all I can do is listen and try to be supportive.”

 

“I know and thank you for listening, I don’t know if I feel better but still thank you”

 

“You know”, Tails took a moment to think, “Kiryu probably didn’t have everything figured out at first, nobody does. You just keep fighting and try to figure out where you want to go. For the moment you are stuck where you are but don’t give up. Also, you may get another game at SEGA that isn’t off the table!”

 

“I know, but like you said, I have to be ready in case I already had my last chance to make a game.” Sonic took out to light another cigarette but the previous one was the last he had. “Damn it. Anyways, I envy you. You seem to have it together”

 

“Not really. I do have plenty of money in savings to keep living in Kowareta Yume for a long time and I have enough to pay for my tuition. However, I am very much stuck on this one exam. I’ve been stuck on it for some time now and failed it 5 times already. Sometimes I wonder do I even want to finish this college. Am I content with doing this for a living? Was this a mistake?”

 

Tails now became just as gloomy as Sonic. Both just sunk deeper into depression.

 

“At least if you graduate you will be making a lot of money,” Sonic said.

 

“I think I’ve had enough of doom for one night,” Tails said. “Let's play who would win”

 

It became an unwritten rule that if both of them would fall into depressive episodes, they would lift each other’s spirits by playing a stupid game they made up together.

 

Sonic smiled, “You’re right. Alright, what’ve you got?”

 

“Okay so, if Samba from ‘Samba de Amigo’ and Spiderman fought Junichiro Koizumi and Jotaro Kujo, who would win?”

 

“That’s a tough one… I think Jun-chan and Jotaro would win by a sliver.”

 

“Think about it, Samba could distract Jun with his music-“

 

“But Jun likes Elvis, I don’t think he would vibe with Samba’s music. They are too different. Jun could probably overpower Samba. Spiderman and Jotaro would have a very long fight, and once Jun would finish his battle he would jump in to help Jotaro”

 

Tails squinted his eyes and thought about Sonic’s scenario. “Yeah your right, they would end up winning.”

 

“Now, listen to this!” It was Sonic’s turn now to make a scenario. “Futaba from Persona 5 and Bob the Builder versus Themistocles and Vin Dizel. Who would win?”

 

“Are we talking Vin Dizel the actor or Dominic Toreto?”

 

“The actor”

 

Tails shrugged “Pffft then it's Futaba and Bob.”

 

“Themistocles’ fleet?”

 

“What about it?”

 

“I mean it’s a fleet”

 

Tails was very confused and said, “Please elaborate”

 

“So his fleet is from the 400s BCE, Futaba can’t hack it!”

 

“Well, Bob the builder would deal with the fleet!”

 

“He is a builder, not a destroyer.”

 

“Vin Dizel the actor is like -4000 debuff. If you said Toretto then I’d vote for team 2.”

 

“True he is quite the debuff.”

 

“That alone makes team 1 the winner.

 

“I suppose you’re right” Sonic conceded.

 

“Now my turn. Madara Uchiha and Mojo Jojo versus Lupin the 3rd.”

 

“This is the easiest battle so far. Lupin would DESTROY them” Sonic said with speed and confidence.

 

“I don’t get it. Whenever Lupin is involved you always say he wins.”

 

 “He is too powerful. You just don’t get it.”

 

“I don’t get it!”

 

“He is literally the most powerful. There is nothing to debate here.”

 

The two broke the despair that was in the atmosphere and continued to play their game into the late hours of the night. Arguing and laughing, they had for now put aside thinking about the future and enjoyed this peaceful moment. 

 

Once they got tired each went to their rooms and fell into a deep sleep.