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Chocolate. Vanilla. Mocha. Strawberry. Mint Chocolate Chip. Neapolitan. Salted Caramel. Cookies & Creme.

Have you ever seen an ice cream tree?

I remember seeing one in a dream in the past. Not only that, I even ate an entire forest filled with different ice cream flavors.

Well, ice cream trees don't exist in real life. They are the stuff of fantasy and delusions of grandeur.

'So, doesn't that mean that the pure-white ice cream tree in front of me, no matter how appetizing, isn't real?'

I snapped off one of its branches. With a lick of the frozen sherbet, the rich taste of vanilla spread through my tongue.

Yum. Just as I remember it.

'I must be dreaming again.'

My first dream in a long while.

But before a person can enter dreamland, they must first sleep. That means I'm sleeping right now, which is a surprise since I haven't slept since I received my wishes.

My improved stats played a role in keeping me awake. It was hard to fall asleep when I possessed near-inexhaustible amounts of stamina. The desire to keep watching memes all night helped too, at least, in the Saiki K world.

'I don't dream or sleep under normal circumstances.'

I don't understand why I'm dreaming. I know this must be Elias's doing—an effect of his mysterious method to aid me in my quest, but I never knew what he was thinking. What was Elias planning by slashing at me, I wonder? I should've asked.

For some reason, I can't forcibly wake myself up. It worries me. I banged my head against the ground, but all I managed to do was create a hole the size of my head.

Hmm.

Hmmmmm.

...

I started nibbling on a brown ice cream tree. As I thought, it was chocolate flavored with little bits of chocolate chip present as well.

I guess I'll eat for now. I'll wake up from this dream sooner or later. While it worries me that my quest countdown is going down while I'm in here slacking, I should wake up in a day. Hopefully, Elias's method worked, and I can finish my quest.

I looked around. Apart from the ice cream trees, the lone and towering mountain made of Cookies & Creme was here too. It was far into the distance. Seeing it reminded me of its delectable taste.

I continued nibbling on the chocolate-flavored tree.

In this dream, I'll save the best for last.

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"Come on."

"It's almost time for the restaurant to open."

My eyes snapped open. The sound of someone knocking their knuckles on a door woke me up.

"Woah, what the hell?!"

I was lying in bed inside an unfamiliar room, in an unknown place. The last thing I remember was starting to eat the Cookies & Cream Mountain.

'How did I get here, lying on a stranger's bed?'

I'm getting a weird sense of deja vu.

"Are you okay inside there?"

I heard the man ask me from outside the room, behind the bedroom door. His voice sounded old, like a grandpa's. He spoke in what was undoubtedly the Japanese language.

What the heck is going on?

'System! Where am I?'

[...]

'System! Come on, what is going on?'

[...]

The System never answered.

"Cupcake, are you alright? I'm coming in."

The doorknob began to rattle. Whoever the person behind the door may be, I didn't want him anywhere near me.

Stranger danger!

"Yes, I'm fine!" I hurriedly replied. "I just..."

Think! Think of something!

"...had a bad dream." I finished my sentence, completely tense.

The rattling of the doorknob ceased. It looks like my hastily made-up excuse worked. I'm glad that the door was locked from the beginning.

"Phew..."

I took note of the way my voice sounded.

'Different. More high pitched,' I thought, comparing my current voice to when I talked to Elias in my older form. I must have reverted to a younger age for some unknown reason.

Well, it's probably because of The Creator. What has he done now?

"I'd like to be left alone," I added.

"Oh, okay. If you need Grandpa, just call out, okay? I can open the bar alone, so take your time to calm down."

"Y-yes!"

The man called Grandpa walked away from the door. Then I heard nothing from the beyond it. The only sound left was from the erratic beating of my heart.

It must have been a few minutes until I decided to get up from the bed. I surveyed my new surroundings.

The bedroom didn't have a mirror, apart from some basic furniture and a window with drawn curtains. Interestingly, an old blocky TV, the type I would find in a granny's room, was in the room. I used it as a temporary mirror.

From the faint outline on the murky screen, a cute little girl stared back at me. I was right. I did become younger. Then!

'Get older!'

I willed my body to age.

'...'

'Come on, get older!'

I did the same thing as before when I talked with Elias, but I didn't grow older.

'Damn it.'

Something's not right.

System, answer me!

[...]

While scratching my head in irritation, I decided to check my map.

Oh wait, that's a system function, and the System isn't working.

[Omniscient Scan]

Oh wait, that's a system function too, and the System isn't working.

'Damn.'

As nothing seemed to work, I decided to walk to the window and see my surroundings.

I pulled the curtains aside.

It was dark, but not like night. The sky possessed a darker shade of blue, and maybe it was just me, but it seemed like it was getting brighter.

I waited for my eyes to adapt. It usually took less than a microsecond, but nothing changed despite waiting entire seconds.

"Good grief."

Through squinting, concentrating eyes, I studied the world before me.

The sky and one side of the ground were all blue, while the other had light sprinkled in many places. With greater concentration, the silhouette of a beachside town in the midst of waking up came to view.

Separating the sea and the sky wasn't doable; the two seemed to blend into one. However, I saw small dots of light in the distance. I guessed them to be boats.

The town was nothing short of simplistic. Many buildings possessed a traditional flair from the faint silhouettes I could discern—small structures without a hint of modernity.

I felt like a tourist that went to a tropical country's countryside. I pulled the curtains back and returned to the sanctity of my dark bedroom.

I think I just got kidnapped. Am I having a nightmare?

Was I shaking? Surprisingly, a little bit.

'System... come back to me... answer me...'

[...]

'Well, fine. I don't need you anyway!'

I willed TheFabric to do my bidding. I set the destination for the moon. Try to kidnap me from there, my so-called "Grandpa."

<Reign>

The surrounding space embraced me. I felt it, and I felt happy to the core.

'At least you haven't left me,' I thought.

That is until I reappeared above my bed.

Before I could drop down the ruffled sheets and go, "What the fu—"

I passed out.

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'My granddaughter is acting weird today.'

Hiroshi diced some carrots into fine pieces. Once he filled a bowl with tiny carrot cubes, he grabbed a celery stalk and continued chopping.

'Has she reached that age? Oh, how fast they grow.'

Hiroshi expertly chopped different vegetables, from celery to onions and even zucchinis, without pause. The decades worth of experience under his belt as the owner and only cook of the "Ocean Oasis Bar" was on full display.

Once finished, Hiroshi added the ingredients to a pot containing steaming oil.

—Sssszzzz

After stirring the ingredients, Hiroshi added chunks of minced meat and continued the cooking process. A fragrant aroma spread throughout the kitchen.

"Hmm?"

From the corner of Hiroshi's aged eyes, he spotted a little figure peeking from the kitchen doorway. She still had bed hair despite waking up a few hours before.

"How are you feeling?" he spoke.

The little figure, his granddaughter, didn't answer.

Hiroshi continued striking a conversation with her as he added more and more ingredients to the pot. He dropped a handful of herbs after pouring in a couple of cups of beef stock, after which Hiroshi covered the pot with a lid and left it to simmer.

He washed his hands and fixed the flat cap on his head, hiding most of his greying hair. All that time, Hiroshi's granddaughter didn't answer.

"Come on now, what's wrong? Was your bad dream that scary? Why aren't you talking to me?"

"..."

She remained silent.

Hiroshi sighed, thinking, 'She really must be at that age when she becomes more angsty... the teenager phase. Yeesh, I do not want to deal with that.'

"Alright, you won't talk. I'm not an expert at this kind of thing..."

Suddenly, his granddaughter's stomach growled, loud enough that Hiroshi heard it over the sound of bubbling stew.

Hiroshi smirked.

"Looks like you need to have your late breakfast, little lady. You've stayed inside your room the whole morning."

He gestured for her to follow him. Fortunately, his granddaughter did.

***

"I made your favorite."

Resembling five hills, a quintet of triangular rice balls rested on a plate. Seaweed covered the bottom half of the rice balls, making them look like mountains with snowy peaks.

"Tuna Onigiri."

Hiroshi grabbed one and started munching on it. "I haven't eaten breakfast yet since I was waiting for you."

He offered her the other rice balls. She took one in her hands and similarly took a bite.

Munch, munch. Chomp, chomp. Gobble, gobble. Gulp.

As if eating was a trigger, she ate the whole thing after another four bites. Her hand was already reaching for another rice ball when Hiroshi broke into laughter.

"Ahahaha!!! What is this? All it took was a rice ball to get your gloomy ass all better! And to think that I was worried!"

But soon, Hiroshi heard sniffles. They came from her tiny mouth stuffed with rice.

"Huh? What's wrong now, Pico?"

"I-I..."

Hiroshi's attempts to console her only seemed to make things worse.

"D-Don't tell me the onigiri sucked so much that you're crying because of it!" Hiroshi grabbed the other rice ball and stuffed his mouth. He found nothing wrong with it.

He still got up from his chair. "It's okay. I'll make something else. You sit here and wait—"

"No! I...! I..." she interrupted.

Pico munched on the food as she let out little sniffles. When she finished her second onigiri, what she said next shook Hiroshi to his very core.

"I... can't taste anything..."

"I... can't smell anything...!"

Then she screamed in a language he couldn't understand.

"ELIAS FUCKING WILLIAMS!!! THE FUCKING CREATOR!!! YOU DAMN CUNTS!!! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME?!?!"

Hiroshi hurriedly covered his ears.

"Woah! Calm down, Pico! It's alright! I am here! Grandpa is here!"

However, his granddaughter didn't stop screaming. Hiroshi reached a frightening conclusion as he saw the madness she unleashed.

'She's definitely at THAT age! What the hell do I do?!'

Hiroshi wasn't the only one that reached a frightening conclusion.

'WHAT THE HELL DO I DO?!?!'

'HE CALLED ME PICO!'

'I'M FUCKING PICO!'

Eira screamed her heart out in realization.

'No, I can't be Pico! Pico is a little boy! I'm a little girl, albeit with the mental image of a man!'

'I can't be Pico! I refuse to be Picooo!!!'

She refused the fact that she became one of the most cursed anime characters to ever exist in the history of everything that is most likely to ever exist. Following The Creator's words, she had become an abomination present in every universe.

The quest penalties included two things that indicated whether she had become Pico in the flesh.

The first is that she became Pico. Eira checked that she was indeed a girl and not a boy, but the fact that she possessed the same name was a huge reality slap.

Secondly, Eira losing her sense of taste and smell wasn't helping to alleviate her worry.

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Penalties:

- Become Pico.

- Lose your sense of taste and smell.

------------------------------

"Pico, calm down!" Hiroshi spoke with a strained expression. But his words only served to make her louder.

'Calling me Pico is not helping!'

Eira doesn't remember anything about the plot, only that the anime was incredibly vomit-worthy. Apart from Pico and the-dude-who-did-you-know-what, Eira knew nothing about other characters or the setting.

Pico had a grandpa? Where the hell was he when all that weird shit was happening?!

"DAMN PERVERTS IN THE ANIME INDUSTRY!!! GO TO HELL AND BURN!!!"

"Please, Pico!"

Hiroshi continued trying to calm her down. Eira took notice of his pleas and, like the mature adult that she was, ignored them completely.

...

Fortunately, as Eira was in a child's body, it didn't take long for her to tire herself out.

"Haaaaah... damn... screw everyone..."

She leaned against her chair. Her breathing was heavy. Many thoughts ran through her head.

'If I just had more time! Creator, you unfair douche!'

'Elias with his stupid, way too detailed, and cautious wishes!'

Angry thoughts.

'Maybe if I was more serious about the quest... took no chances...'

'I should've eaten Han Jue. The extra Luck might have been useful instead of the help from stupid Elias.'

'If I could just turn back time... oh wait, I could do that in the past. I didn't appreciate that ability enough...'

Regretful thoughts.

'...'

'...'

'...'

No thoughts.

'...'

Eira sighed.

"Pico, I don't know what the hell that was about, but damn do I wish your parents were here. Ah, don't tell them I swore."

Hiroshi slumped back to his respective chair after Eira calmed down.

"So, did you have a bad dream? That's what you said earlier when I asked you earlier this morning."

"Absolute nightmare."

"And you're sure you can't taste or smell anything?"

"...yes."

Hiroshi scooted over to her side. Then, he tried to pat her head to comfort her, but Eira got off her seat when he got too close.

'Fine, you want some space. Maybe Pico had a bad dream about me.'

Just the thought of it sent cracks through Hiroshi's heart. His face looked as if it aged by an additional 20 years in seconds.

"Cupcake, you know Grandpa won't hurt you. And maybe all you have is an eenie meenie cold. I'm sure you'll be fine by tomorrow or the day after." Hiroshi's voice was gentle. "Do you want me to call your parents and have them pick you up?"

Eira's ears pricked up.

'It's a good suggestion, but I don't know if it's gonna be good for me.'

Perhaps just a little, Eira regretted clicking away from the first episode of Boku no Pico too soon.

But...

"No. I'll stay, Grandpa."

Eira decided that staying in the countryside where no one but her Grandpa knew her would be for the better. At least Eira will have time to familiarize herself with her new identity as Pico, the girl.

'I'm already lucky that this Grandpa isn't questioning my weird behavior. I'll need to tone it down,' she thought.

Hiroshi smiled brightly at her response.

'My granddaughter is staying! Yes!'

Hiroshi was just glad she was still willing to stay with him.

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