“Snow.”

The sound of his name in that deep voice startled him.

Snow had the sensation that he’d heard him call his name before, during the time they’d spent in that small cave, but then his mind had been too muddled to properly register exactly how it sounded. Even now, he couldn’t really put it into words. It felt … constricting and scary, he finally decided. Which didn’t make any sense, since he had never minded what other people called him, be that his name or much more offensive words than mere brat.

“I have been meaning to talk to you about this,” ZaiWin¹Literally zai (blade) + win (chaos). went on in a surprisingly serious tone, and Snow stood up, not wanting that comfortable, gentle humming to interfere with his ability to think.

“I am aware that it was my choice to come back for you, and that it was my choice to … reestablish the connection between us. But I will never recognize you as my Tien’Elhar²Literally tien (Heaven) + el (supreme) + har (girl child). The Heavenly Beings also known as Celestials in the common language.,” he openly declared, the cold blue eyes looking firm and unwavering at him, like a pair of hard, precious stones.

The sharp pang that pierced Snow’s chest at the sound of those words made him frown and swiftly avert his gaze.

What was he thinking?, he immediately chastised himself. He had never wanted to be bond to anyone anyway! In fact, it was bad enough that that damned connection had been reestablished. As long as it existed there was no way he could be free, no way he could simply leave and try to make a life of his own. Any more than that and what? He would probably find himself being dragged by a leash! Like this, at least, Snow still retained a mind of his own, he was still able to choose to oppose him. He could still remember how hard it had been not to follow his commands, before VinWei³ Literally vin (hard) + wei (crystal) had given him that bracelet. Even now, whenever he got angry and ordered him around, Snow’s heart would jump into a frenzying beating, an unexplainable wave of fear washing over his entire body, propelling him into obeying. He couldn’t and didn’t want to imagine how worse things would be, should ZaiWin actually do whatever was supposed to be done to formalize their bond. So why was his chest hurting?

“It’s not because of anything you may be thinking,” ZaiWin offered, making him look at him again, a confused expression on his face. “It’s not because you’re different from other Celestials.”

Snow blinked as the sharp pain was swiftly washed away.

Was that what had been worrying him? He couldn’t help feeling embarrassed by the fact that, apparently, ZaiWin knew what was coursing through his own head better than he did.

“ZenTar⁴Literally zen (silent) + tar (wind). is right. To tell you the truth, if you weren’t this different I would have probably killed you a long time ago, no matter what might have happened to me in return,” ZaiWin simply stated, once more without even blinking, his voice taking on a much colder, deadlier tone. And Snow couldn’t help remember what MenTar⁵Literally men (lake) + tar (wind) had told him, about how ZaiWin hated all Tien’Elhar. He wondered why was that? Weren’t Tien’Elhar generally loved and admired by all? Even adored as Holy Beings sent by the Heavens?

“You’re most definitely a pain in the ass. But I … don’t dislike you,” he added and, for the first time, the two bright-blue gemstones that were his eyes seemed to waver a bit, as if he were uncertain of his words. “Well, if I did, I wouldn’t have gone through all the trouble to get you back,” he quickly declared, regaining his cold composure. “And although I may be harsh and impatient at times, I do understand that, like me, you never wished for any of this. We’re actually a lot alike. Both had shitty lives. Both can’t seem to get rid of this damned shitty fate. And, as if one shitty fate wasn’t enough, we’re now stuck together, and you have to put up with my shitty fate as well, and I have to put up with yours.”

“You could just have let me be …” Snow whispered, trying to gather enough courage to speak his mind for once. “It wasn’t as if I didn’t know what I was doing, as if I hadn’t thought things through. I knew I might not survive, and I had accepted the possibility of that outcome.”

“I will not allow you to die!” ZaiWin brusquely declared, raising his voice, a deep frown marking his forehead, his eyes flashing in anger. And Snow couldn’t help take a step back when the pressure of those fierce words almost made his knees buckle. “Do you understand?”

Snow nodded, his heart beating frantically against his chest. Even though he couldn’t see it, he could most definitely feel it. That unnatural, distorted force emanating from him. The heavy, dense darkness that always surrounded him.

“As long as I’m alive, you are not allowed to die!” he commanded and the order wrapped itself around Snow’s heart like a heavy chain. “So you are not allowed to ever do such a stupid thing again!”

At the sight of the clear frightened expression on the boy’s face, ZaiWin forced himself to take a deep breath and calm down a bit.

“I understand you did it for the people of Nox⁶Literally nox (night). Nox is the name of the Clan (family name), also the name of a Province. ZaiWin uses it because he is the Governor of Nox, but we will find a way around it. If it ever comes to the point where there’s no other way, I will abdicate of my position as Governor of Nox. Because I’m the only member of my Clan, I am both Nox’s Governor and Calzai, which is unheard-of to begin with. I will retain my Calzai position and suggest someone else to act as Nox’s Governor,” ZaiWin declared, sounding more collected, and Snow nodded, even though he knew that things would never be that simple.

“Unlike Wei⁷Literally wei (crystal / precious stone). Wei is the name of the Clan (family name), also the name of a Province. or Won⁸Literally won (wood). Won is the name of the Clan (family name), also the name of a Province., Nox has always been a poor Province, reason why it was abandoned by three generations of El’Dur⁹Literally el (supreme) + dur (ruler). Name given to the Emperor. The Empire doesn’t need its lands or its people, and so they probably won’t mind if someone else is left in charge of things.”

“But … it is your land …” Snow declared, feeling sorry for how easily he was willing to give up on it. Now he could clearly feel it. If the land didn’t belong to ZaiWin, it would never hum to him in the sweet way it did.

“So it is. But the land needs its people. And people are frail, perishable things. They are also the chains I was bound with when I was a child,” he sighed as an afterthought, but Snow couldn’t really understand what he meant by that. “So, as long as the people remain safe, the land will be fine as well, no matter who holds the title of Governor.”

Snow nodded. That he could understand, though he still felt sad at the idea of him giving his land over to someone else. Snow didn’t know how, or if it was true, but he had the feeling that the land also cared for ZaiWin very much.

ZaiWin took a deep breath and raked an elegant hand through his black hair.

“In any case, I needed you to understand. Now that I’ve chosen this path, we will probably end up having to deal with other Celestials and their Chosen Ones. There’s no way we will be able to hide here forever,” he added with a grunt. “But you and I, we can never be like them.”

Snow nodded and then thought it better to answer in his own words.

“I understand.”

“What I mean to say is that I realize and have come to terms with the fact that you are a Celestial, and that I am your Chosen One. But you … you can never be my Celestial. Not now, not ever.”

Snow nodded again.

That he had no problems understanding. Although, if it was as ZaiWin said, and it wasn’t because he was different, he couldn’t help wondering why he found the need to establish such an impenetrable line between them. Not that he wanted to be his anything!, he immediately told himself, feeling his cheeks warm up. He agreed with him. Their situation was bad enough as it was. No need to complicate things any further. But it was human nature, he supposed, to wonder about the reasons behind such a blunt declaration.

“Does that make you uncomfortable?”

Quickly raising his gaze, Snow vehemently shook his head, searching for adequate words to answer him.

“Now I also see that I am not like everyone else … Before, I knew that my … blood … was … different,” he forced the words out of his mouth, his stomach quivering at the mere sound of that word. “But I never knew why, or that being different meant other … things. When you told me that I was this … Celestial … it made no sense to me. Even now, I still find it hard to accept. Which does not mean that I doubt it. It’s just that … there is a lot that I don’t know. About what a Celestial is supposed to be. About what it means to … choose someone. Why I chose you … How I chose you … What I did wrong …”

“You haven’t done anything wrong!” ZaiWin immediately countered and Snow averted his gaze, a frown burrowing into his forehead.

“I clearly did. I never meat to … choose you. You never wanted to be chosen.” ZaiWin closed his mouth, pursing his lips in a grim expression. “And so, when the opportunity came, I thought I could fix it.”

“And you call that fixing it?” ZaiWin inquired, anger pouring into his voice again, and Snow’s shoulders slumped.

“I thought you wouldn’t … care …”

ZaiWin clenched his teeth and swallowed his angry words. Well, he had thought he wouldn’t care as well. In fact, why he cared so much to the point of being willing to take such a high risk was still a mystery to him.

Snow took a deep breath and raised his head, his pale eyes suddenly collected and self-assured.

“Since I am to live, there is a lot I must learn. About myself. And about you as well,” he openly declared, turning to face him, and ZaiWin couldn’t help smile at the sharp defiance hidden in that pale gaze.

“Am I to conclude that this means you still don’t trust me?”

“As far as I know, you are not a trustworthy person,” he bluntly pointed out without as much as flinching and ZaiWin couldn’t help laugh, faced with that cold, impenetrable expression.

Really! How was he a Celestial again?

"For instances, you still haven't explained to me how come our bond was restored," he pointed out, and ZaiWin's laugh transformed into a wide grin, as once more he was inwardly pleased with being shown how sharp Snow really was. "Because I know it was completely gone. And you all said that we were linked because I kneeled in front of you."

ZaiWin took a deep breath and shrugged nonchalantly.

"I guess none of us really knows how this bounding thing works?" he suggested and the critical glare Snow gave him only widened his smile. "I'm not joking, though. The kneeling thing is what's written in every sacred scripture, and what normal people see, when they attend an official haehir¹⁰Literally hae (blessed / sacred) + hir (ceremony / ritual). Blessing Ceremony held so that Tien’Elhar may find their Chosen One.."

"But I didn't kneel again, in that cavern," Snow insisted and ZaiWin nodded.

"No. You didn't."

"Then how?"

Didn't he remember?, ZaiWin wondered? Or was he simply unable to put the two together? Well, he guessed it was kind of normal if he couldn't associate giving him blood with the establishment of their bond. After all, throughout the years, many other people had drunk his blood, and nothing had happened, besides the healing part. No energetic connections had been established, not even weak ones. Which kind of left ZaiWin wondering about that as well, even though he had already formulated a few theories regarding that matter.

"I may be wrong, but the way I see it, the whole kneeling thing simply marks the moment when a Celestial becomes aware that they're standing before their Chosen One. It's the moment when you think, 'ah, he is the one.'"

Snow's cheeks turned red all the way to his ears.

"I never thought any of that!"

ZaiWin chuckled.

"I bet you didn't. Anyway. I guess you can see the kneeling part a public declaration that you have found your Chosen One. It is also the moment when you ask your Chosen One to accept you and to establish a true bond. In itself, it doesn't have anything to do with the actual formation of those energetic bridges you mentioned before."

Snow pursed his lips, clearly embarrassed by the whole conversation.

"Then how ...?" he managed to ask between clenched teeth and ZaiWin took a deep breath.

"Heart." Snow frowned and glared at him again, to which ZaiWin replied with an annoying, smug smile. "You should ask your heart about that."

"So you're not going to tell me," Snow pointed out, remembering what he had told him about how he would never lie to him, which didn't mean he wouldn't hide things from him, and ZaiWin took a deep breath.

"I can't answer what I don't know. You can probably find the correct answer to that better than me."

Because, no matter what, be it kneeling or whatever, that whole thing was still Snow's doing, Snow knew, even without ZaiWin mentioning a word about that. And yet he was sure that there was something else he wasn't telling him. He most definitely wasn't a trustworthy man!

“Ready for another jump?” ZaiWin asked, clearly changing the subject, and Snow sighed, but still nodded.

ZaiWin stood up, closing the space between them, and wrapped his arms around him, making sure he held Snow's head protectively against his chest.

The sound of his beating heart echoed all the way to Snow’s brain, the warmth of his body quickly seeping through his clothes. Taking a deep breath, Snow closed his eyes. He may not trust ZaiWin’s real intentions, he may even doubt his future actions and decisions, but, right now, Snow couldn’t help feeling foolishly safe.

Silvareiel

Ah, poor Snow, as always having to deal with ZaiWin's evil personality! Sure, he's not mistreating him anymore. No. Now he openly teases his every chance he gets! ? Bad, bad ZaiWin! ?