Monday

Nicole woke up sobbing, Aidan’s blank face burning behind her eyes. She clutched her pillow to her chest, every cell in her body drowning in disgust and loathing. She looked at her clock: 3:30 in the morning. 

She couldn’t stay here. She needed to be somewhere else. Anywhere else. 

The gym opened soon. That would take her mind off of things. 

***

Sweat poured from Heather’s scalp, off her face, down her back, as she buried her gloved fists into the heavy bag. She hit it with her left, right, left, left, right, again and again and again, each time seeing the Bishop’s face. She shook her head, trying to get it out of her mind, trying to get Cyrus’ words out of her mind. ‘Your faith isn’t strong enough.’

It made sense- she’d never been particularly religious before college. Nobody in her family was either. Nothing against it per se, but they’d just never been a church-going family. 

But now it was a problem. Now, she wasn’t able to do something she NEEDED to be able to do. Lives were at stake, the world was at stake. 

She punched the bag in a rapid-fire burst of machine-gun punches, screaming as she went. The other gym-goers stared at her, and Heather just held out her arms and shouted, “WHAT?!”

They all resumed their respective workouts silently. 

“Thought so,” Heather said. 

“Hey,” a voice came from the side. 

Heather flinched, but then relaxed. It was just Nicole- good. She was clad in basketball shorts and a baggy t-shirt. “Hey, Nicole, what’s up?”

“Actually, I was looking for you.”

“Oh yeah? What for?”

“You box?”

“Yeah, a little bit. I started taking classes when I got to college. Prudent idea, in hindsight.”

“Could you teach me?” Nicole asked. 

Heather rolled her shoulders. This could be a good idea- teaching someone else might help her find this whole ‘faith’ thing in regards to what she was doing, who she was. Maybe she just needed to believe in herself and this was how it started. “Sure. Wanna start now?”

“I was so hoping you’d say that!” Nicole squealed. 

Heather walked her through the basic stances and strikes. They started with shadow boxing, and then moved over to the heavy bag for the fun part. 

Nicole struck, but struggled to use full-force. 

“Hey, come on, give it your all,” Heather said. 

“Right!” Nicole nodded. 

At least she can do that, Heather said. I apparently cannot. I can’t do anything- can’t finish my book, can’t figure out what career to pursue, can’t exorcize a fucking demon. Should I talk to someone about this? Maybe Father Gonzalez? He does seem like the person to talk to about my faith not being strong enough. I feel like I can already guess what he’ll say though. ‘I need to find something to truly believe in.’ But I already do- I believe in myself. Isn’t that enough? “Nicole, come on- you gotta really punch that bag. Imagine it’s your worst enemy.”

“You mean Winona?”

“... Er… Yeah, actually. Imagine it’s Winona. She’s evil AND she’s been giving your girl grief.”

“Amy’s not my girl,” Nicole said, assuming a fighting stance and launching a jab powerful enough to finally shake the bag. “... I don’t know if it’s a good idea. She and I. She hurt me,” Nicole said. 

Heather sighed. “I know she did. And you’re probably right. Caution is a good idea in these things. I’m guessing you’re new to dating?”

“Completely new,” Nicole said, punching and punching and punching. 

“Look… Ultimately, you gotta listen to your heart on these things. I know that sounds corny, but it’s gonna want what it wants. And sometimes it’ll make you listen to it, so it’s probably best to be willing to do so every once in a while.”

Nicole stepped away from the bag, arms limp, heaving deep breaths. “What about you?” Nicole said, pivoting to face her. “You didn’t really say much yesterday, after things died down. You okay?”

“I…,” Heather trailed off. Nicole was probably a good person to talk to about this. She was one of the more religious people Heather had ever met. But something… 

“Do you need anything?” Nicole asked. “Do you wanna talk about anything?”

… Something felt off. Like there was something Nicole was avoiding saying. 

“Actually, there’s something I was wondering about- what did Winona say to you?” Heather asked. 

Nicole gulped. “N… Not now? Okay? Later, when we’re all together. But not now.”

“Nicole, what’s going on-”

The blonde darted off, and was outside before Heather could stop her. 

Heather stood alone in the gym, haggard and exhausted, with more questions than answers. The only thing she knew for sure was that she wasn’t strong enough, and she would have to be, because she had a feeling that soon she might be carrying extra weight.  

***

Amy woke up on her couch, her body oversaturated with pain and exhaustion. Cass had come home with them that night, and was passed out in Amy’s bed. Amy stared at her living room ceiling, wondering for the hundredth time if she could ever hope to feel normal again. 

You never felt normal, though, Amy thought. You knew, you always knew, deep down, that you were a freak. Now it’s just been confirmed. Twice over, no less. 

She looked outside. The sun was rising out the window, beams of light trying to pry through the wall of storm clouds jailing the sky. Looked like it would rain, and rain heavily. She wanted to hide under her blankets, shun the light, shun human contact, keep herself safe from their prying eyes and hideous judgements for all time. 

I have to tell Mom and Dad, she thought. Telling them about… Everything. My sexuality is one thing. They accepted Debbi. But my heritage… Astra… Dad will freak out when he finds out the mother of his eldest child is a succubus. And Mom… Will I still be her daughter if she knows what I really am? Will she let me be? Or will she hate me as much as… 

A door swung open behind her. Amy poked up her head over the side of the couch and found Nicole exiting the bathroom, fresh and ready for the day. She wore a light pink sweater and long blue skirt and white high heels, accented with her bright pink lipstick and subtle mascara and eyeshadow. She wore pearls around her neck, her short blonde hair was perfectly parted and raised ever so slightly with gel, and the most adorably peppy smile Amy had ever seen graced her lips.

First, Amy had to stop herself from drooling. It was early in the morning, and she hadn’t had coffee yet, so that was a tough ask and she wasn’t sure if she succeeded. Nicole was utterly beautiful: this was the girl who’d been so desperate to break free of the cage she’d been in the first nineteen years of her life and see the world. She looked so happy to be there, for each second she got to feel the Grace of God in her life and drink in the fresh air. An airy feeling, like she was swaddled in blankets of pure sunlight, covered Amy, and she gulped. You have it BAD, she thought to herself. Haven’t had it this bad since Derek Maycomb back during Freshman Year.

Second, Amy did a double-take. She looked at the kitchen clock and saw it was only six in the morning. Amy should be up because she had class in two hours and needed to get ready. But Nicole didn’t have class on Mondays until early afternoon. 

Third, Amy remembered what Nicole had been doing before bed: sobbing her eyes out. 

“Hey, you!” Nicole said, traipsing over to her with grace and coordination. Amy had been showing her how to walk in heels, hands on her hips as she guided Nicole through each step, heel-toe-heel-toe. Evidently, the practice had paid massive dividends- Nicole could’ve been strutting down the catwalk in that moment.

“Hey,” Amy said, struggling to keep her eyes on Nicole’s face. The sweater highlighted certain… Assets her roommate had developed over the past few weeks very, very well. “What are you doing up and about so early?”

“I just wanted to get a head start on today,” Nicole said.

“A six hour head start?” Amy said. 

“Actually, more than that: I left at four to go to the gym,” Nicole said. 

“Um… What?”

“What?” Nicole asked. “I woke up and wanted to work out. That’s a good thing, isn’t it?”

“Well, yeah, but after yesterday, I just figured you’d…”

Nicole stared at her, waiting for an answer. 

“Never mind,” Amy said. “Where are you going, anyway?”

“Oh, I figured I’d walk you to class, then go off to the library and study for a while. I’ve missed a few classes these past couple weeks, so I need to get caught up on all my work.”

“You… You wanted to walk me to class?” Amy blushed. 

Nicole sat on the couch next to Amy, who swung her feet off the side. Nicole put a hand on Amy’s shoulder and nodded. 

“Is… Is everything okay?” Amy asked, trying valiantly not to squeak each word. 

“Yeah. Why wouldn’t they be?”

“Well, yesterday, you were-”

“Yesterday is yesterday,” Nicole said. “It’s like you said- you can always make things better. That was a good thing to say- I really think you live by that. I admire that about you.”

The speed of Amy’s heartbeat outstripped her brain’s speed of intelligent thought. All that was left was the unintelligent ones. She giggled in a way she was sure sounded idiotic. 

“And your laugh is wicked cute,” Nicole said. 

Amy’s jaw dropped. 

Nicole giggled too. Not fair- her’s was adorable whilst Amy’s was stupid. 

Amy’s mind was a fuse box doused in water. People didn’t talk to her this way, not when they were flirting. It was always ‘hey sexy’ or ‘you cum here often’ or ‘you offering discount rates, babe?’ This was… This was different. She was different. 

It was as if the world were suddenly VERY different than she’d once thought it to be. 

“Uhhhhhh…..,” Amy stuttered. She gulped, then said, “Actually, I was thinking of blowing off class today. Someone needs to stay in and take care of Cass- I’m worried about her mental state.”

“Right,” Nicole nodded. “Of course. You’re so responsible- I really admire that, too.”

Amy’s brain threatened to melt out her ears. “Oh, stop.”

“No, I mean it,” Nicole said, leaning forward. “You’re a great big sister, and I think that’s a great quality.”

For a demon. A great quality for a demon. “I think we need to have a talk. About… About…”

Nicole took Amy’s hand. “About us?”

Amy bit her lip, and then nodded. 

“I agree. Our last one was interrupted. I don’t want that to happen again.”

You were crying yesterday, Amy thought. Sobbing like crazy. Couldn’t even look anyone straight in the eyes you were so guilty and ashamed. And now you’re… Like nothing happened at all. Not with Aidan, not with Winona, and not with me. This isn’t… This can’t be normal.

“Do you wanna have that talk now?” Nicole said. 

“I… No. Not yet,” Amy said. “I just woke up and I’m all gross and I haven’t had any coffee and you… You look like you just stepped off the cover of a magazine you’re so hot. That’s just not fair.”

Nicole smiled gently. “You’re always beautiful, Amy.”

AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH- “That’s incredibly sweet, but you know what I mean.”

“Okay,” Nicole nodded. “Fair enough. “I think I’ll head out then.”

“What? No, you don’t have to do that-”

“I really do need to get some work done, and I don’t wanna disturb you or Cass while I do that,” Nicole said. 

“O-o-okay,” Amy said. 

Nicole stared at her, stared into her, through her. “Could I… Could I give you a kiss on the cheek?”

Amy, in spite of all her instincts and years of social programming, found herself nodding. 

Nicole pressed her lips to Amy’s cheek. Soft, gentle- that was how she felt. Amy wondered how she tasted.

Nicole got up and gave a girly wave after that. “I’ll see you later. Text me if you need anything. Also, let’s go to the comic shop this week- I can’t think of anyone I’d rather go with than you.”

And then she left. 

Amy fell over and held a pillow to her chest. I’m new to this. But this can’t possibly be normal. 

TUESDAY

Cass sat in the back of the van, in the parking garage for the hospital. Her hand was under her chin, and she sighed deeply and watched the window fog up before her eyes. 

“Are you sure about this?” Victoria asked from the driver’s seat. 

“Really sure?” Patrick asked from the passenger’s seat. 

From the two front rows, Amy, Debbi, Richard, and Jason all gave her understanding looks, looks that said, ‘we will be right behind you if you need us.’ Next to her, Tim and Damian did the same. 

Cass gulped, then shook her head. “I need to do this part myself. But you guys… You’ll be here when I’m done?”

“Wouldn’t dream of being anywhere else,” Amy said brightly. 

“Seriously, we’re here for you,” Debbi said. 

“And if you need anyone to beat up your mom, we’ll be more than happy to oblige!” Jason beamed. 

“Jason, no!” Amy, Debbi, and Richard all chastised at once. 

“Thanks but no thanks, Jase,” Cass said. 

She unbuckled her seatbelt and got out. 

The hospital lobby was packed. Made sense- Nicole couldn’t exactly heal everyone personally, try as she might. The receptionist pointed her towards the appropriate room, and followed the path to where her mother laid in a bed hooked up to an IV drip. Her deadened eyes were locked on a television, watching The Babadook. 

“Hi,” Cass said. 

Her mother said nothing, didn’t look away from the TV.

“How are you feeling?” Cass asked. 

“... Fine,” Juanita said, still not making eye contact. 

“Can I sit down?” Cass gestured to the chair next to the bed.

“It’s a free country.”

Cass’ eyes narrowed. A flint struck inside her chest, the sparks lighting a fire. She wanted to let it burn, but she tried to hold her breath and smother it instead. “You know what? I’ll just stand. So tell me- how was it you got possessed?”

“A demon ambushed me,” Juanita said flatly. 

“That’s not what I’m asking. A demon can only possess you by exploiting a pre-existing flaw. A bias. A hatred.”

“What are you asking me, Cassandra?” Juanita finally looked at her. Glared at her. 

“I’m asking what the demon used against you,” Cass said, not breaking eye contact, heart hammering.

“What do you think it was?” A rhetorical question, by the sound of it. 

Cass answered anyway, the fire in her chest exploding back to life. “It was me, wasn’t it? Do you really hate me that much?”

Her mother turned her gaze back to the television. “That white girl and her fake family out in the hall with you now?”

“... No, they’re waiting in the car. And they’re a real family. They’re her real family.” 

“But they’re not your real family,” Juanita said simply. 

Cass’ insides grinded against each other, adding more and more sparks to the fire. “And you are?”

“I’m your damn mother, girl!”

“No, you’re not,” Cass said. “I’m an object in your mind. Something you use to get what you want. You think I don’t know that Dad only married you because he knocked you up? You’ve been using me since before I was born.”

She snapped her gaze back over to Cass. “How dare you?! I loved your father!”

“I know you did,” Cass said. “But you never extended that to anyone else. Least of all me.”

“Because you’re a horrible little puta, who defies me, gets into trouble, pals around with people you don’t belong with-”

“Wow, Mom. Just wow.”

“And you won’t even avenge your father!”

“Because I’m one person, Mom! I can’t take on an entire city worth of cops! Even if I could, that’s not why I was given these powers. If I even tried what you wanted me to do, I’d wind up in jail or dead and my team would be down a soldier because I decided to go off half-cocked.”

“They’ll find another one!”
“You don’t know that!” Cass hissed. “You don’t know anything! You’ve never even met my friends, never even talked with the Bishop outside of when I first got my powers.”

“Yes, yes, tell me about your precious Bishop and how much you idolize him, your precious Catholic Church. Because that institution is so much less corrupt-”

“DON’T CHANGE THE FUCKING SUBJECT!” Cass said. “We’re not talking about him, we’re not talking about the Church, we’re not talking about Dad, and we’re not talking about the fact that you wanna use me to get ahead on your fucking career because you keep hitting dead ends in IA! We’re talking about you and me, and I want a straight fucking answer out of you for once in your fucking life! Do you really hate me that much?”

Juanita stared her dead in the face. “This clearly isn’t going to be a productive conversation, so why don’t you just go. And don’t come back until you’re ready to apologize.”

Cass grinded her teeth together, balled her fists. The chair next to her mother’s bed started to levitate. Saved you, saved your worthless fucking life, your worthless fucking soul and you… You… You don’t even care. You’re so caught up in your own pain and trauma and impotent fucking rage you literally can’t see or hear anything else. 

I may as well not even be here. 

Cass uncurled her fingers, and the chair fell with a sharp thud. She didn’t say anything, simply walked away. 

By the time she made it to the lobby, she was blinded by her own tears. Someone was there, though, someone warm and steady, wrapping her arms around Cass. 

“Mom?” Cass asked. 

“If you like, sweetie,” Victoria said gently. 

Cass embraced her mother, her real mother, and wept and wept and wept as Victoria guided her back to the car. The rest of her family waited for her there. 

***

Heather sat atop the concrete steps leading to the church. A raindrop fell from the sky above, and another, and another. The wooden door to St. Joseph’s opened behind her, and the Bishop stood in the archway. 

“Would you like to come inside?” he asked. 

“Yeah. I would,” Heather said. 

He gestured her indoors, and he crossed himself as he passed the altar. Heather, after a moment, did the same. 

“How are you holding up?” Heather asked, sitting down at the front-row pew. 

“It’s been an interesting few days,” Bishop Roberts said with a shrug, sitting down next to her. “Nicho… Nicole’s healing really does work wonders. All my aches and pains are strictly of a phantasmic variety.”

“Yeah,” Heather said. “You’re using her real name.”

“I… Yes, I am. She wanted to free me from the demon, even though it was a valuable resource. And she healed me without a word of protest. That… That sort of thing is hard to overlook.”

“Yeah, I suppose it is. And what about me?”

The Bishop exhaled. “Ms. Hanazawa-”

“Heather. Please just call me Heather.”

“... Heather. I have nothing against you personally. I know that in the past I have been… Rather close-minded and old-fashioned about certain things. I am a man of the Church… It is my duty to enforce the dogma that Rome espouses. At the same time, though… God called you for a reason. He called Nicole for a reason. And it wouldn’t be the first time there’s been a discrepancy between what Rome says and what individual parishes do. I’m sorry for my previous behavior. I truly am. I’ll need to apologize to Ms. Nygaard as well. And going forward… I’ll defer to Father Gonzalez on more contemporary social issues. He seems rather more in tune with that sort of thing than myself. I’ll try to simply run interference with the Archdiocese, make sure they don’t look too hard at all this, don’t ask too many questions they won’t like the answers to.”

Heather smiled. She hadn’t been prepared for this. She’d never been entirely comfortable around Bishop Roberts. He was… Well, more or less what he described himself as. But now… Maybe he was changing. “I accept your apology. And… I’m sorry too.”

“Whatever for, child?”

“I failed,” Heather said, staring up at the crucifix. “I tried to exorcize Cyrus from you the other day, and I failed. My faith wasn’t strong enough. I wasn’t strong enough.”

“Heather,” the Bishop said, clasping his hands together. “You are an incredibly strong person. I mean that both literally and metaphorically. You’ve worked over a year for an institution you neither agree with nor have any particular attachment to, knowing simply that it was the right thing to do. That you could help people and save lives was enough incentive for you. That takes the kind of ethical resolve that very few people have. Perhaps organized religion doesn’t speak to you in the same way it speaks to Nicole, or Amanda, or your dear Deborah. That is okay. What matters is that you know what is right and you are willing to fight for it.” 

“If that’s true, why didn’t my powers work on you?!” Heather said. “That’s never happened before.”

“Your faith wavered momentarily on Sunday. It happens. There have been plenty of times I’ve had doubts myself. When I was trapped in that sigil, Cyrus controlling my body, the doubt was never stronger than it was then. I felt my faith wasn’t strong enough to break free. The water lowered in the cell inside my mind, but it never emptied. My faith wasn’t strong enough to free me from my hatred. But I’ve been given an opportunity to rectify that, to let go of my hate, and to live as God wants me to. My faith has grown stronger because of that, and I think it will grow stronger still. And so will yours. Be it your faith in God, in this institution, or, perhaps more likely your case, your friends and your loved ones, and your simple, intuitive knowledge of right and wrong. You are strong enough. Have faith that you are, have faith that the doubts will fade like darkness at dawn, and you will persevere. You will flourish. I am sure of it.”

Heather gulped, and a small smile appeared on her lips. “Thank you, Bishop.”

He smiled. “You may call Marcus. If you’d like.”

Heather smiled back. “Thanks, Marcus.”

“Do you have a long walk home?”

“Not far, no.”

“Ah, good. Say hello to Deborah for me.”

And with that, Heather got up and walked out. She still wasn’t sure of herself, of God, of anything, really, but even if her own faith was lacking… At least others had faith in her. 

WEDNESDAY

Debbi let the rain pour over her as she ran against the wind. Only a few more yards to the church. She stopped at a red light, waited for the sign to switch to the walking pedestrian symbol. From the corner of her eye, she noticed something dart past her. She turned to look, but saw nothing. She faced the light again, and then, from the corner of her right eye this time, she saw a flash. 

She pivoted. 

Still nothing. 

Her teeth chattered in the cold wind. She needed to get some sleep. Midterms were next week, and between that and nightly patrols she was running on proverbial fumes. Heather keeping her up most nights as well probably didn’t help, but it was rather hard to complain about that particular use of time. “Getting paranoid, Donahue,” she muttered. 

The sign turned to walk. 

Debbi crossed the street, hoping to see Heather there. It had been going well for them. Granted, they still hadn’t been on an actual date, but Debbi didn’t mind. Things were so hectic they might not have time for that. 

Still, she thought, It might be nice. Get gussied up. Heather can wear one of those pantsuits she rocks, we can go to a nice restaurant or get some dinner… Okay, maybe I do wanna go on a real date. 

Something inside her hesitated at the concept, though. She was out now, people knew she was bi, but still, actually going on a real, romantic date in public with a girl was… Well, it was a next step she hadn’t really thought about, and it scared her. 

And what were she and Heather, anyway? Were they girlfriends? Friends with benefits? Were they trying not to put labels on it? The two of them hadn’t really talked about all that. They just kind of… Fell into what they were doing before, how they were before, except now they were sleeping together. 

We need to talk about it, Debbi thought. But not just yet. Right now it’s time for work.

She hurried up the steps and inside the church, where the other four girls, plus Father Gonzalez, Bishop Roberts, and Sister Quinn waited for her. 

“Sorry I’m late,” Debbi said, plopping down next to Heather and giving her a kiss on the cheek. 

Heather blushed. “Babe, not in front of the clergy.”

Bishop Roberts rolled his eyes. Father Gonzalez and Sister Quinn both chuckled. 

Her sisters sat together, Amy looking tired and weary, Cass looking… Better, honestly. The whole family had gone out for dinner last night, and all of them had assured Cass that in all ways but legal, she was a Donahue. Cass had cried. A lot. A profuse amount, really, and Debbi couldn’t exactly blame her. 

Nicole, meanwhile, was pacing up and down the center aisle. Her high heels gave her an extra two inches, and her stride was wide and confident. Her smile was bright and happy and… Seemed somehow rehearsed. Something about the way Nicole was carrying herself… It seemed like she’d had to practice at it. 

I mean she did only come out like three weeks ago, Debbi thought, Could be she’s just been practicing moving and smiling more like a girl. 

Or she’s still beating herself up. Or both. Probably both. 

I’ll ask Amy about it. 

Then Debbi realized that the tired, weary, concerned expression on Amy’s face was being directed at Nicole, and it all made both more and less sense simultaneously. 

Time for work, not personal drama, she reminded herself.  “Alright, so, what do we know?” Debbi asked. 

“Wait, we’re not all here,” Cass said. 

“Who are we-”

Cass pointed behind her. Suddenly, the boy from the graveyard was there. He hadn’t been, and now he was. He wore a sharp black suit and a blood-red tie, his hair combed and parted to the right, but the bags under his eyes and hunched shoulders indicated a severe lack of sleep in his recent past. He carried a wiffle ball bat, holding it like a cane but not supporting his weight on it. 

Cass stood up, a smile gracing her face for the first time in days. She practically lit up and hurried over to greet him. “You came,” Cass said. She’d dressed nice today- her favorite red dress with white polka dots, a pair of black leggings underneath, red lipstick and dark eyeshadow. She’d been hoping he’d show up. Debbi noted this- hopefully they could trust this kid. The last thing Cass needed right now was a broken heart. And the last thing their team needed right now was another traitor in their midst. “It’s nice to meet you more formally,” Debbi said. She extended a hand. “I’m Cass’ sister Debbi.”

“And I’m her sister Amy,” Amy said, running up to join them. 

“And I’m Heather.”

“Nicole.”

“Father Gonzalez.”

“Bishop Roberts.

“Sister Quinn.”

“It’s nice to meet you all,” he said, his Southie accent a mild gloss over all his words. “I’m Matt Calahan.”

“So,” Cass said, gesturing him over to a pew and sitting down next to him, batting her eyelashes. Sheesh, Cass, not one for subtlety are you? “You have powers.”

“I do,” Matt nodded. 

“So are you a… A transwoman too then?” the Bishop asked innocently. 

Amy face-palmed. 

Cass furrowed her brow, as if she hadn’t considered this possibility and was now having to take stock of herself.

Nicole’s jaw dropped. “B-Bishop, you really shouldn’t-”

“No, I can’t say I am,” Matt chuckled. “Why do you ask?”

“Well,” Nicole started. “Here’s the thing.”

She explained. 

Matt shrugged and said, “Yeah, no. I’ve had my powers since I was thirteen, and if it was gonna change my body to line up with my gender identity, it would’ve done so by now. I’m a cis guy, I assure you. And, uh, you look fantastic by the way, ma’am- what are your pronouns?”

“She/her,” Nicole chirped. 

“Gotcha. I’ll remember that,” Matt said, giving her a thumbs up. 

“She’s only a year older than us, you don’t need to call her ma’am,” Cass said. 

“Okay, hold up a sec,” Heather said. “If you’ve had your powers since you were thirteen, and you’re what, eighteen? How come you haven’t come forward until now?”

“Because until about a year ago I was homeless,” Matt said simply. 

“Oh,” Heather said, pawing at her face like she was trying to get an egg off of it.

“To be honest, and I don’t really have much choice in the matter there, I wasn’t really sure what it all meant at first,” Matt said. “See, here’s the thing… God, how do I explain this?”

“Just try your best,” Cass smiled. 

She does love her pretty boys, Debbi nodded approvingly. 

“I can’t lie,” Matt said. “And around me, nobody can. And I can’t turn it off.”

“Oh really?” Heather said. “Prove it.”

“... Are you sure you want me to do that?” Matt said. “This could lead to some embarrassing information coming out.”

“No, go ahead,” Debbi said. “In fact, I have an idea- ask if any of us have ever committed a crime.”

Debbi barely registered that everyone was staring at her in horror. She didn’t get why- this was a good idea. There was no way a bunch of superheroes and clergy members would have anything to confess to here.

“Okay, fine,” Matt said, thick brown eyebrows raised. “Have you ever committed a crime?”

“I’ve never committed a crime in my life,” Debbi said proudly, hands on her hips. What the hell, she wasn’t even gonna answer the question… 

Heather stared at him a minute, sucking in her cheeks and clenching her fists. Then, finally, she spoke: “When I was in high school I shoplifted. A lot. Mostly just makeup, but one time I stole a mannequin so I could see how outfits looked on it!” Heather slapped a hand over her mouth, her eyes bulging with shock.

Debbi balked. How the hell had Heather managed to steal a whole mannequin?!

“I have at least fifteen unpaid speeding tickets,” Amy said, then gasped, jaw dropped.

Debbi gaped at her big sister. Amy would never admit that to anyone! How the fuck…   

“Does vigilante justice count as a crime?” Cass asked, confusion shooting across her face. “What about assaulting an officer? Does it count if the officer is your biological mother? What about keying a cop car? ‘Cause I did that once when I was back in Providence for a day trip. Also, I stole three hundred bucks from my mom once and spent the money on weed and condoms- oh my God! Why am I talking?! Why am I still talking?!”

“I was dishonorably discharged from the armed forces for defying my CO’s orders,” Father Gonzalez whispered, sitting down and running his hands through his hair. “It wasn’t labeled a war crime, but given the context-”

“I’ve committed tax fraud,” Sister Quinn said solemnly. 

“I’m an accessory to my parents’ insurance fraud,” the Bishop bellowed. “They burnt our home down when I was ten to collect the money, to pay for my braces!”

Nicole broke down sobbing, burying her face in her hands. 

“Nicole?” Debbi asked. “What is it? What could you possibly have done?”

She peered out from behind her fingers. “I have five overdue library books! And I once opened my sister’s mail!”

Debbi and Heather both groaned. Cass snickered. Amy patted her on the back. 

“So you weren’t kidding,” Debbi said to Matt. 

“No. Sorry if I just made things awkward-”

“Honestly, I just found it funny,” Cass said, then slammed a hand over her mouth. Then underneath her hand, she mumbled something else. 

“What’s that?” Matt said with a wry grin. 

Debbi was reasonably sure it had been, ‘and I find you incredibly hot.’

“Mr. Callahan,” Father Gonzalez said. “As fascinating as this is, may I ask why you chose now to reveal yourself to us?”

A grim expression overtook Matt’s face. “Because those monsters killed my friends. Like I said, I was on the streets for a while. Those homeless people that the freaks in the devil mask’s killed? I called them Pete, Jack, and Tony. They took me in, let me share a tent when I was out and around. Wasn’t perfect, they weren’t perfect, but I still checked in on them every week. So when I got there this week and found them cut to bits… I decided I needed to do something about it. That was when the lovely and talented Ms. Ortiz arrived.”

Cass put a hand on his shoulder in concern, leaned forward. “I’m so sorry.”

“Yeah, honestly,” the others all agreed. 

“Thanks,” Matt answered. 

“But how did you know I’d be at that cemetery?” Cass asked. 

“I didn’t- I was following those two chucklefucks in the masks- pardon my French.”

“Okay, but what about your bat?” Cass asked. “How do you channel Light into it?”

“Can you guys not do that?”

“No, we do this,” Nicole said, her eyes still red from crying, her fist humming with White Light. 

“I tried doing that once, but I can’t really hold it for more than a few seconds,” Matt said, his own fist flickering dully. “It’s easier for me to channel into something else.”

“Fascinating,” the Bishop said, coming forward and looking at the young man. “May I ask- now that you’re here, would you be interested in…,” he trailed off, like he’d just realized something. Possibly that he was about to invite him to join the team without talking about it with the girls. “... In running a few experiments, to see the specifics of how your powers work?”

Better. 

Matt shrugged again. “Sure. Why not? Figure I’m in this now, may as well be all scientific and shit about it.”

“Okay!” Nicole said. “We’ll also have to see how your abilities interact with mine- I can supercharge other people’s powers, so it’ll be interesting to see-”

“Nicole,” Debbi cut her off. “I think we should put this to a vote.”

“Put what to a vote?” Cass asked. “We’re just talking about getting to know him better-”

“Cass,” Amy said, “With everything that’s happened, we all need to be on the same page.”

Thanks, sis, Debbi thought, glad she was backing her up. Reminded her of high school, during the captaincy bid… No, no, don’t think about that right now. 

“Look, I don’t wanna cause any division in the ranks,” Matt said. 

“You’re not, but still, I think we need to vote on whether or not to work with you. Just to be safe,” Debbi said. 

Cass’ barely restrained glare spoke volumes, but then she nodded. “You’re right.”

“All in favor of working with Matt Calahan?” Debbi asked. 

Nicole and Cass raised their hands. 

Slowly, reluctantly, so did Amy. Not backing me up that much, I see.

“Well that’s that then,” Cass smiled. 

“Why so it is,” Heather said. 

“Well then that’s settled,” Sister Quinn said. “What else is on the itinerary then?”

Nicole sighed again. “I have something.”

She told them what Winona had told her, about Hell, and about Satan. By the end, she was sitting down, shoulders hunched, hands gripping her knees. 

“That… That has some interesting implications,” Father Gonzalez said. 

“Yeah, I’ll say,” Sister Quinn replied. 

“I mean look, there’s a chance it’s all hogwash,” Nicole said. “But still…”

“We do have a way to verify that now, though,” Heather said. 

“Hey yeah!” Matt said. “If you guys need me to-”
“I think what we’re gonna need is some time,” Debbi said. “We need to make some concrete plans. Start looking for Winona and deal with her once and for all.”

“Fair enough,” Matt shrugged. 

“Is there anything else?” Debbi asked. 

Nobody spoke. 

“Okay,” Debbi said. “Cass, can you please promise you’ll take it easy this week? Maybe skip another night or two of patrol? You’ve been through the wringer, and I-”

“Okay,” Cass said, looking at the ground. Debbi blinked rapidly- and here she was, chastising herself for barking orders like some kind of wannabe leader. But Cass agreed, without argument. That was… Different. 

All of this must’ve really gotten to her. Not that Debbi could blame her. 

“Well then let’s the rest of us do some patrolling,” Debbi said. 

“I’ll hang back here with Matt, help with the tests,” Cass offered. 

“Sounds good. Alright team, let’s break.”

Nicole and Heather started walking out of the church. Amy stood next to Debbi and said, “Good job.”

Debbi winced, but then gulped and said, “Thanks.”

Maybe you’re not so bad at this after all.

THURSDAY

Patrol the previous night had yielded no results. Nor had that night. Winona was nowhere in sight. And no demons were on the prowl either. 

Nicole limped into her room, her arms and legs heavy, her rear aching from riding all night. It was four in the morning, and she wanted to sleep for a few hours. Or a few months.

She crawled into bed, curled up, and all the emotions, all the fear and dread and guilt and shame, collided with her like a runaway locomotive. She sobbed into her pillow, trying to cover up the sounds. She didn’t want to disturb Amy- she’d been through enough lately as is. She couldn’t afford to pick up Nicole’s pieces- she was barely holding together her own. 

She’d done this every night this week. Ever since she put Aidan in a coma, taken away his chance, his choice, she could barely sleep. All she could do was cry.

A half hour later, she still wasn’t done crying. She needed to pull herself together. She needed to talk to someone, someone who could look at this objectively. She retrieved her cell phone from her nightstand and called her father. 

“Hey there, champ,” her dad said on the other end of the line. 

“Hi, Dad,” she cried. 

“Hey, hey, what’s wrong?”

“I… I did something bad.”

“What is it?” he asked. 

She told him about Aidan. 

“I see,” Dad said. “Nicole, you listen to me, and you listen to me good, girl.”

“Okay,” Nicole said gravely. 

“You did the right thing.”

“... But-”

“This Aidan character, he was threatening you, threatening your friends, threatening your city. So you hurt him before he could hurt you even more than he already had. And maybe that isn’t the most conventionally Christian thing to do, but sometimes, you’re not afforded that option. It’s called moral luck. Sometimes you roll well, other times you don’t. You do the best you can with the roll you get, and sometimes… Sometimes you’re not gonna be sure if you did the right thing. And that’s okay. That’s life.”

“But you… You’ve always known how to do the right thing, Dad,” Nicole said. “You’re the best person I know.”

He gave a bitter laugh. “I’m really not. I’ve made tons of mistakes. To be honest… Sometimes I still wonder if I do the right thing whenever I go out on my boat. I leave you and the rest of our family behind so I can be out on the water, unprotected. It tore me up inside, when I realized just how much I was missing.”

“We needed the money, Dad,” Nicole said. “I don’t begrudge you the choices you made.”
“Heh. Thanks,” Dad said. “It’s nice to hear that, ‘cause most days I’m still not sure.”

“You’re a fisherman,” Nicole said. “It’s what you do.”

“And you’re a superhero. That’s what you do,” Dad said. “And I’m so incredibly proud of the woman you’ve become. I always… I always thought there was something in you, something… Different from what I saw on the surface. I was never sure, and I didn’t want to push you, didn’t want to make you uncomfortable, but I knew that deep down there was this light inside you that desperately wanted to get out, break free and shine over the world. And when I saw you, in that dress, with your friends, flying through the air… I knew she’d finally broken free. You’re the best person I know, Nicole. And I know that you’ll always try to do the right thing. I love you, sunshine.”

“... You… You haven’t called me that since I was little,” Nicole said, choked up. 

“Heh, yeah… Well, it was something I wasn’t sure my son would want to be called but… Well I know now you’re my daughter. And I guess that means you’ll always be my little girl.”

Nicole cried again, this time from the joy and the euphoria and the relief. “Thank you.”

“Of course, sunshine,” Dad said. She could hear his smile through the phone. “Now, maybe you went a little far with this Aidan. But I don’t know what I or anyone else would’ve done differently in your shoes. What matters now is how you deal with this. Give it to God, and see what He does with it. And take it from there.”

“Okay,” Nicole sobbed. 

“How are you feeling?”

“I… I’m just tired. And confused. It’s all so much, Dad.”

“I know, sweetheart. I know. Deep breaths. And remember: I’m here for you. Whenever you need me, whatever you need, I’m here and I love you.”

“I love you too, Dad,” Nicole said. “How… How are you doing?”

“I’m good. I’m just about to head out on the boat- got a full day of fishing to get in. Gonna just stay at the motel for the week then head back- you know the drill.”

“How are things at home?” Nicole asked.

“Fine, last I checked. Your Mom is prepping her students for midterms. Monica is thriving, looking at going to states for cross country. Zack… Well, he’s Zack.”

“Does he… Does he talk about me?”

“... No. He doesn’t. But give him time. He’ll come around,” Dad said.

“You think so?”

“I know so. He might be thick-headed, but he’s not so dense as to bite the hand that fed him. Well, not hard anyway.”

Nicole giggled. 

“Now, I want you to get some sleep. I’ll be back on shore by nightfall if you need anything,” Dad said.

“Okay! I love you, Dad!”

“Love you too, Sunshine.”

The phone clicked off, and Nicole stared up at the ceiling, a profound relief filling her chest. She’d messed up, hurt someone who, yeah, maybe deserved it, but it still didn’t feel good. But she could make it right, and she knew she would. It was like Dad always said: as long as you had the stars above, you’d find your way home eventually. 

Sleep came soon thereafter. 

Friday

“So,” Debbi said, standing in front of the re-opened sorority house. 

“So,” Heather said. “You wanna crash here tonight?”

“... No, actually,” Debbi said, holding Heather’s hand. 

“Okay, then we can go to your place tonight-”

“Heather. I don’t think we should be together every night,” Debbi said.

“... Oh?” Heather’s heart grew heavy, threatening to sink. 

“No, don’t take it like that,” Debbi said. “Come on, let’s go get some pizza.”

They walked together, hand in hand, through the streets on the cool, damp night. 

“I don’t wanna rush into this,” Debbi said. “I… I’ve thought about this. About us. For a long time. It was what I wanted but didn’t wanna admit to wanting, ‘cause I wasn’t ready to face that part of myself. I was scared-”

“Of how people would look at you?”

“Well,” Debbi said, “Yeah. And I… I thought maybe I wasn’t good enough for you.”

Heather balked. Now that was the craziest thing she’d ever heard. “Deb, how on earth could you-”

“‘Cause I’m bi and you’re gay and I thought-”

“You thought I only wanted gold-stars?” Heather said, mildly insulted. 

“No, just that I didn’t deserve you because I wasn’t,” Debbi said, looking at the ground. 

“Debbi, you are absolutely fine,” Heather said. What is it that I want?

“Yeah, but you… You’re a freaking lady-killer, okay? You have a different girl every week, sometimes more than one. And they’re all, like supermodel level gorgeous- how could I measure up to that? I’m not nearly hot enough for you!”

Heather gripped Debbi’s hand even tighter, lifted it up and kissed it. “Debbi. You were literally a cheerleader. And you’re a superhero. And you’re wicked smart. And you’ve read all the same long, convoluted fantasy novels I have. How on earth could you think you’re not hot enough?! You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever known.”

Debbi stopped where she stood and chewed her lower lip. “You… You really mean that?”

Heather wrapped her up in a hug. “Of course I do.”

“Th… Thanks. And I guess that’s the thing: this is good. This is exactly what I’d hoped it would be, everything I could’ve possibly wanted. But we’re also new at this- I’m new to dating girls and you’re new to going steady-”

“Pffft, I thought Nicole was old fashioned-”

“Oh, shut up,” Debbi said as they resumed walking. “What I’m trying to say is that I’ve rushed things before and I don’t wanna do that again. I don’t wanna… Ruin this. Not when it’s going so well and it’s so far the best I’ve ever had. Plus, you’re also my best friend and my teammate-”

“So what?” What is it that I believe in?

“So maybe we shouldn’t start living together just yet? I know we’ve been sharing a room the past week or so and it’s been… Well, pleasurable… But I don’t wanna fall into the same trap again. It’s one lots of college kids fall into and I feel like it’s a bad omen.”

That was… Easily the most responsible thing Heather had ever heard. It was reasonable, mature, forward-thinking. Debbi thought about the future. Thought about their future together. 

This, Heather thought, this is what I want. This is something I can believe in.

“Okay,” Heather said with a smile. “And I just wanna say I completely agree.”

“You… You do?” Debbi said, relief blossoming on her face. 

“Absolutely,” Heather. “I… Thought about this a lot too. I just didn’t think it would happen because I wasn’t sure if you… You know? But you want to be with me, and I wanna be with you. So let’s make this work. Let’s go on a real date tonight- dinner, a movie, whatever you want-”

“You say that like I won’t be the one paying for it,” Debbi cocked an eyebrow.

“Hey, if I’m gonna have a rich girlfriend, I’m gonna enjoy it,” Heather said.

“G… Girlfriend?” Debbi said. 

“Yeah. That okay?”

“More than okay!”

“Okay! Then let’s go out on the town, hot stuff. But don’t worry, I’ll be a perfect gentlewoman, have you back home by 10. Sound good?”

“Sounds great,” Debbi said before going in for the kiss. 

Heather kissed back. The rain began to fall over them, but she didn’t care. She had something to hold onto, someone to believe in. Somewhere to put her faith. 

They stood there a while, lips locked, holding each other up. 

***

You’re okay, Nicole thought, you’re okay, you’re okay, you’re okay. She stared at herself in the mirror. She’d had another crying fit after getting home, and had spent the last hour trying to fix her makeup. She wanted to call Dad again, hear his comforting, reassuring words, but he was at sea- there wouldn’t be any reception. Besides, she couldn’t burden her father with all her problems. She was an adult now and needed to handle things on her own. 

Aidan’s comatose body flashed before her eyes, and his words sounded in her ears: ‘she’ll never accept you. Nobody will ever accept you.’

But that’s not true. People have accepted me. She has accepted me… But have I accepted her? I care about her. And I feel something for her. And I definitely don’t want to hurt her, not ever. Even if she is a demon-

Nicole slapped herself across the face. Bad! That is a horrible thing to think! What is wrong with you, you judgemental-

“Nicole, are you in there?” Amy said from the other side of the bathroom door. 

Nicole gulped. She took a deep breath, and she opened the door. 

“Are you okay?” Amy asked, the sweetest look of concern on her face. 

“Yeah!” Nicole said with the biggest smile she could muster. “I’m fine. Dandy.”

“Then why are you crying?”

“I’m not-”

“Your eyes are red and your makeup is running,” Amy pointed at her face. 

Nicole touched below her eyes, feeling the wetness. “Oh. Huh… How did that… Get there?”

“Nicole… What’s going on? You’ve been… You’ve been off all week.”

“I…,” Nicole started. You’re pathetic for thinking she’ll ever really see you for who you are. And you’ll never be able to stop judging her, you… You… “Dysphoria,” she lied. It wasn’t entirely untrue, but Amy didn’t need to know what the source was. 

“What’s that?” Amy asked innocently.

Would it kill you to look some stuff up on your own? I live with you for… No. No. Bad. “It… It’s when my body feels wrong. Feels… Feels like a boy’s body.”

“But… That doesn’t make sense. You’ve a girl’s body now,” Amy said. “You changed- you look amazing.”

“Sometimes it just… Well, it flares up,” Nicole said. “Always had. When I was a kid, I didn’t know what it was. Just that I felt wrong. Like I was wrong.”

Amy put a hand on Nicole’s cheek. “There is absolutely nothing wrong with you. I haven’t… This isn’t because of me, is it?”

“No,” Nicole lied. “You’re fine. You’re absolutely fine.”

Amy smiled. “Liar.”

The floor fell away from her. “What are you-”

Amy gulped. “Let me help you with this, okay? May I touch you?”

Nicole nodded. 

Amy sat Nicole down in the bathroom and wiped off her makeup, then put a fresh coat on Nicole’s face. Her touch was gentle, her powders and rouges tickling Nicole’s delicate skin, her green eyes like soft emerald pools. Joy and sorrow competed for space inside Nicole’s brain, and her shield thrummed next to her heart, trying in vain to keep Amy away. 

But I don’t want that, Nicole thought. Do I want her?

Her shield screamed no. Her common sense was of a similar mindset. 

At the same time, though…

Well, it was rather difficult to deny what she felt when Amy was an inch from her face.    

“There. Done,” Amy said. 

Nicole turned to face the mirror. Her face was perfect, her makeup was perfect, and Amy was…  Amy… 

Amy made her feel beautiful. 

“Thank you,” Nicole whispered. “Do you… Still wanna go to the comic shop with me?”

“First I wanna ask you something: have you forgiven me? I mean really, deep-down forgiven me for what I did to you?”

Nicole stammered, jaw wide-open. “I… Yes, I have.”

Amy chuckled. “Liar.”

“No, Amy, I-”

“Nicole,” Amy said. “You think I haven’t heard you crying all week? I’m sure that’s mostly because of Aidan, but I know… I know you still hesitate when you look at me. I know you said you feel something for me, but I… I’m just not sure I believe that it’s genuine. You’ve been flirting with me a lot lately, but I don’t know that your heart is really in it. I think you’re trying to convince yourself you like me because you think it’ll be good for me, and because you think it’ll make the pain go down easier. ”

“What are you saying?” Nicole said.

Amy’s smile was heavy with sorrow. “It means I don’t wanna force you to do anything, or make you feel pressured, or like you have to rush to forgive me or anyone. Take all the time you need. Until then, let’s just be friends.”

Nicole wanted to cry again, but she nodded. “Friends.”

“Good. Now. Comic book store?”

Nicole smiled. “Comic book store.” 

For a moment, a brief, fleeting, rapturous moment, all the fear, all the resentment, all the judgment evaporated, leaving only euphoria and joy. Amy wanted Nicole to be okay… The same way Nicole wanted Amy to be okay. And whatever else happened… That was okay.