Dear Patroclus,

 

 I wait for your return. There is a pit in my stomach, a growing, gnawing sensation of fear I cannot shake free from.

 

I let you go, allowed you to leave and you swore to me that you would not fight. You promised. 

 

But why… why do I feel this gnawing fear that seems to spread inside me?

 

Patroclus, you must return to me. 

 

You will return. I know it. You will come back, safe and sound and finally back in my arms with a smile. 

 

I will not, cannot think of the alternative. It is something I cannot fathom. I refuse to think of such thoughts.

 

Patroclus.

{《○●●○》}

I see, I see you, Patroclus, my beloved. And it breaks me. I feel my heart shatter and my soul splinter agonizingly. 

 

  My breath is shredded from my lungs as I scream, and scream while I cry out your name desperately, unable to catch my breath as I run and shove them away. I collapse to my knees heavily as I take your bloodied, cool, and limp form into my arms. 

 

It cannot be..

This - cannot be…

 

This isn't real. It is a nightmare. You cannot be my Patroclus. 

 

Your too still and your eyes are closed, blood lingers on your paled lips. I say your name over and over but you do not respond. 

 

I sob as I cry, I scream and wail, rocking you in my arms while I cling so hopelessly to your lifeless corpse.

 

My beloved…

My Patroclus… 

 

Please do not leave me.

 

I'm sorry… 

 

Forgive me, Patroclus.

 {《○●●○》}

 I cradle you close in my bed. I run my fingers through your dark locks of hair. I press my lips to yours then your eyelids and your cool forehead. 

 

You do not stir. You do not blink. You do nothing but lie motionless and still. Dead in my arms.

 

There is none of the brilliant life in you that I desperately yearned for, that I cherished so deeply. 

 

I crave Hector's death, crave seeing his blood flee from his worthless being. He will pay for taking you from me. 

 

I will have my vengeance, my beloved.

 

Patroclus.

 

I will join you soon. 

{《○●●○》}

  Hector is dead yet I still live in a world where you no longer exist.

 

 I despise this. Why do I still live? How can I continue without you in my life? 

 

I cannot wait for the day Death comes for me.

 

I miss you. I yearn to see your smile once more. I yearn to see those dark eyes gaze into mine full of love. I yearn to kiss those lips that always yield to me. I long to see you, Patroclus. 

 

I feel that it will not be long now. 

 

Wait for me, Patroclus. 

{《○●●○》}

 I feel the pain of the arrow piercing my heart, I smile as I greet death. I am eager to see you once again, Patroclus. 

 

My beloved. 

 

I am coming. 

 

Patroclus. 

{《○●●○》}

  Odysseus and the others burn my body. I watch as they bury our ashes together as I had wished. 

 

  I am overcome by anger as my own flesh and blood, twelve year old Pyrrhus, denies that your name be marked next to mine, denies that you be remembered and instead forgotten and forced to wander the world as a spirit. I can do nothing but watch them in anger. That foolish boy. 

 

I can only watch and cling to my anger and sadness as my name is etched into the tombstone and for a moment I see you, a flicker of your incorporeal shape in the dawn light, holding onto the tombstone.

 

I cry out to you, desperate for you to see me, to hear me. But as I call out your name but you do not see me nor can you hear my cry. 

 

It breaks me. I shatter and crumble in agony and sorrow as my greedy gaze lingers on you until my soul fades away and I enter the underworld. 

{《○●●○》}

  I wait. And wait. And wait.

 

And wait. For how long? I do not know. I only know that I will not give up waiting for you. 

 

I hold onto an impossible dream. I cling to the thought of us reuniting, however long it takes. 

 

My soul is weary. Elysium is a sight to behold but not more than you, never, my beloved. I yearn. I crave. I am hopeless and desperate and I do not care. I cannot be at peace in Elysium without you, the other half of my soul.

 

Patroclus.

Patroclus.

 

I need you.

 

I'll wait forever, Patroclus. I'll never stop waiting for you. 

 

 Abruptly, I feel a tug on my soul. 

 

My soul sings, It's you, it's you! Patroclus!

 

I follow the feeling in my soul. I search for you.

 

And there you are. 

 

I am frozen. I feel like falling to my knees and weeping. 

 

"Patroclus!"

 

"Patroclus!" 

 

I call your name and your head whips toward me, brown eyes blown wide and filling with tears. We run, you stumble while my feet stay steady but my body trembles from emotion. 

 

You're here. You're here. 

 

Our bodies connect, and we embrace each other tightly. I am crying. It seems we both are. You cry out my name. I cling to you and caress your face and kiss your lips, your cheeks, your eyelids and I savor it all. I cannot get enough of you. I have missed you with every inch of my soul, Patroclus. 

 

My most beloved. 

 

I ask how, how is this possible.

You answered that it was my mothers doing, for my sake. 

 

I hated how my mother hated you, how she treated you. 

 

But this - the one gift she has ever given me is allowing us to reunite, giving us peace at last. Giving you back to me. My treasure, my gift. The other half of my soul, my most beloved, Patroclus. 

 

You repeatedly tell me that you are here and it soothes and heals my fractured soul, warms my heart with undying love. I steal passionate kisses from your lips with mine, and it is never enough. I kiss you with every fiber of my soul, pouring all my desire and yearning, all my love for you in every one of them. 

 

I sing and chant my love for you, the other part of me I never want to be separated from ever again. 

 

Patroclus, my heart. We part an inch away, breathing in each other's breaths. You smile up at me and I grin in return, my soul burning with contentment and happiness that you are finally in my arms again, by my side. 

 

I press our foreheads together as we continue to hold each other tightly. 

 

 The serene feeling of peace blankets us in a cocoon of happiness and love, for we are together once more. We are whole again. I will savor and cherish our time together, for forever, for eternity - or however long it may be. 

 

All that matters to me is that we will be together, from now on.

 

As long as we have each other, we are home. You are my home, my peace, and my love.

 

Always and forever, my beloved, Patroclus. 

{《○●●○》}

In the darkness, two shadows, reaching through the hopeless, heavy dusk. Their hands meet, and light spills in a flood like a hundred golden urns pouring out of the sun.