TW: Graphic depictions of suicide
A world of gloomy people and darkness they stick their noses up at anything they have to deal with. Nobody wants to deal with something that's anywhere close to their own fault.
They all watch but never care.
This is the story of Beatrice Jones she watches but never says a word keeping her mouth shut to be part of a crowd but she is not the same nor is she even close to being someone else.
This is her reality.
This story starts on monday may 2nd 2015
It was cold and gloomy, something I had been expecting, something I'm always expecting. The rain hit the window fast, making loud tapping noises. I also heard hints of thunder, not too loud but not too quiet either. I watched the rain for a second before noticing my mom standing behind me, she stood leaning on the doorway watching the rain "mom..." I said looking back at her "sweetie, get dressed, school is in an hour" my mom said with a smile "it's pouring out there" I replied "It's always pouring out there, don't be lazy" my mom said walking away.
I rolled my eyes and got out of bed, I put on my school outfit which consisted of a dark plaid skirt with black and light purple striped thigh high socks and a buttoned up top and some combat boots, I styled my black hair into two space buns on the side of my head and went downstairs. "WAIT what about breakfast!" My mom had yelled before I ran out the door.
I walk by myself in the rain to school since I didn't really have all too many friends.
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I walked into my school's halls to get ambushed by a bunch of assholes "WHOOPS!! Looks like you've dropped your books" they said while laughing and walking away to which I just rolled my eyes, something I expected, something I always expected.
I got on the ground and picked up my books but as I was about to pick up the last one someone had kicked it out of my reach I scoffed and went over to grab it but then it kept getting kicked and I kept running after it like an idiot that was until I bumped into someone "looking for this?" They said bending over to grab it, I looked up to see someone with short light pink hair going into a darker gray ombre with pale white eyes, "yes" I said as I snatched it out of their hand "Sid Collins" they said as they held their hand out with a smile "why would I care" I said with a raised eyebrow to which they looked a little shocked at my words.
I walked right past them going off to my first class.
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I sat in the back of class ignoring everyone although it was hard because of how loud everyone liked to be, the teacher stood and waited with tired eyes looking for class to be over, no one seemed to have any respect for him or even looked his way.
I guess he decided to stop even trying teaching since no one listened or payed attention
I don't really blame him for giving up though.
The bell rang and everyone rushed out acting like they were being held hostage but I'm pretty sure the teacher didn't even care if we left or not.
I headed to my next classes not learning anything new as people were way too loud or the teacher had no idea what they were even doing. Lunch isn't even exciting since they rarely decide they actually wanna serve us food and even when they did everything was uncooked or moldy.
I usually stay in the cafeteria not to eat but to listen to music and watch the rain, "watcha doing?" I heard a voice say to which I looked over to see Sid from earlier "what..." I asked, looking annoyed "whatcha listening to?"" they asked looking curious "none of your business" I said putting my earbuds back in, not looking their way hoping they would leave, they sat there for a while before falling asleep, I looked over to see their short frizzy yet fluffy hair covering their face and looking peaceful as if they were dead, I stared at them noticing little details like tiny little freckles scattered all over their face and how their hair somewhat curled at the ends.
I subconsciously picked my hand up to take the hair away from their face just as I was about to they woke up to which i pulled my hand away as fast as I could "oh shoot I didn't mean to fall asleep we should get to our next class" they said walking away but I just sat there a bit frozen.
I soon snapped out of it and went on to my next class.
I sat there barely paying attention to the lesson that was being shown to me. I just kept staring at the rain that fell from the clouds, hard to ignore since it hits the window so loudly.
The bell rang and we all left the classroom without a care in the world.
We wrapped up our classes and began to go home.
I began to walk alone outside in the rain before getting stopped "hey you should take this!" sid said smiling "you're persistent...." I said rolling my eyes "just take it you'll get wet!" they said before forcing the umbrella in my hand and walking away.
I ended up throwing away the umbrella.
I walked up to my home's door listening to the sound of somewhat loud arguing. I rolled my eyes and walked through the door not caring if they heard me or not.
Seconds later after I walked in They stopped yelling "AH Beatrice sweetie!!" my mom said "mom..." I said uninterested "if you heard anything me and your dad we were ju-" she said before getting cut off "I don't care" I said walking up to my room.
I changed out of my school uniform and took out my space buns, I then plopped down on my bed listening to the sounds of arguing from downstairs "this is how it's always gonna be" that was my last thought before drifting off to sleep.
Tuesday may 3rd 2015
I got a headache that morning and some pain in my right eye but it turned out to be gloomy and cold just as expected and it was raining just as yesterday. The rain had been slower today. The dark yet fuzzy clouds still fill the sky "huh guess the rain is still going...." my mom said leaning on the doorway "yeah guess so" I said looking over to her "make sure to get ready" my mom said walking away.
I began to get my school outfit on that I had worn the day before and put my hair back into space buns and walked down the stairs "HEY before you RUN off! Take this lunch I made for you" my mom said running up to me "no thanks" I said "Don't be ungrateful I work hard for you so take it" my mom said forcing the sandwich in my hand "thanks" I said walking out the door.
I later threw away the sandwich
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I made it halfway to school before someone jumped in front of me "how unusual for you to take this route" she said crossing her arms "avoiding some people" I said with a blank face "I thought you were avoiding me!" she said, sounding like a lost puppy "oh how could I ever avoid the great and amazing AMELIA SOLACE!" I said, trying my best to crack at a joke "still as attitude ridden as usual I see" Amelia said smiling "only the worst attitude for my favorite people!" I said with finger guns "WOW i'm so honored" Amelia said putting her hands on her chest to which I rolled my eyes.
"Amelia! Get back here!"
Amelia widened her eyes "guess that's my cue" she said bowing as if she was a star
Amelia Solace was the oldest of her 10 siblings, she had teal hair that was tied into two ponytails on the side of her head and skin paler than paper along with hair that was just enough to cover her eyes. She dropped out of school because of rumors circulating about her being in a mafia or gang.
Amelia and I went our separate ways and I began to walk to school without a care in the world.
Just as I showed up Sid ran to me "you're soaking wet! Why didn't you use the umbrella I gave you???" Sid asked me concerned "I threw it away in a trash can nearby" I said casually "what why...?" Sid asked looking sad "You can probably still get it....I mean that is if no one took it" I said walking away and patting them on the head.
I went to my classes sitting there waiting for people to show up as my headache got worse and my eye also began to feel more pain as well but I decided to bear it as no one would help me or even care.
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The room soon filled up with many people. My headache began to disappear after more people came in.
The teacher stood there with those same tired eyes watching and waiting for us to leave.
He soon left the room before all of us looking as if he was going to cry but no one noticed not a single person batted an eye they only thought of themselves.
A couple minutes later we all heard a thud, a loud one in fact it was hard to ignore so they all went to check it out. I went along with them being just as curious.
They went outside to see the teacher on the ground laying head cracked open and blood pouring out and eyes wide open looking lifeless. They all began to circle around him to call him a coward and selfish. They all started to talk about him like he was now just an object that could be pushed or thrown. Is he selfish or are they just ignorant?.
It was his only way out of his misery and that I commend him for being so brave.
The police soon showed up and took him away in an ambulance but they all just laughed, laughing at a suicide how messed up is that? I guess we're all a little messed up but who finds something so sad so funny.
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We were allowed to leave school early due to recent and unfortunate events of course no one believed it was truly unfortunate. The principal is probably happy to not have to pay him anymore. It sucks but that's the reality no one cares unless they have to.
I went home and went up to my room ignoring all the arguing that was coming from the other room. Who cares, I'm used to it.
I laid in my bed listening to my usual music I closed my eyes for a while I felt a sense of pressure on my throat as if someone was trying to choke me but I couldn't open my eyes to see anything I just kept feeling this pressure until I couldn't breathe, I kept to trying to grab but I couldn't feel anything around my neck so all I could do was lay there with this intense feeling of pressure on my neck.. that was until I heard something being whispered in my ear "it's almost time" and then it stopped, I could breathe and I could open my eyes.
I was left with a headache and pain in my right eye.
Wednesday may 4th 2015
"Beatrice get up, you'll be late!" my mom said as loud as she could in my ear to which I opened my eyes as I could "You're gonna have to cover that up" my mom said crossing her arms "cover what?" I said confused "that eye of yours" my mom said leaving the room to which I got out of bed and began to get dressed.
"Here, wear this," my mom said, handing me an eyepatch "What's this for?" I asked, taking it from her hand "your eye looks off and weird" my mom said walking away.
I went to the mirror in the bathroom and began to look at myself. My right eye seemed to be a bit darker than usual and seemed to be a bit redder but I brushed it off and put on the patch and left the house.
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Amelia ran up to me as I walked to school "oooOooO like the eyepatch it really goes with that dark "atheistic" of yours" Amelia said "my mom made me wear it" I said annoyed "oh well if it helps it's looks good on you" Amelia said smiling "thanks but It doesn't help" I said walking "sorry to cut this convo short but I got to go" Amelia said walking away.
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I walked into school being ambushed by Sid "What's with the eyepatch?" they ask walking behind me. "None of your business" I said, getting annoyed. "I guess that is your personal business...." They said following me to class.
I walk to my class to end up getting a bunch of fake blood thrown all over me "ha for the freak!" they said laughing I assumed they were trying to make fun of the recent suicide of the teacher to which I rolled my eyes and ran to the bathroom to clean myself up to which Sid ended up running with me.
"Hey I'm sorry about them, they can be assholes..." Sid said as we entered the bathroom "it's not they can be it's that they are assholes" I said correcting them and looking at the annoyed "yeah I guess so....." they said propping themselves on the sink next to the one i'm using to clean the fake blood off "hey I know this is random...but why do you hate me so much...?" Sid asked fidgeting with their fingers "I don't have a reason to like you or desire to be your friend" I said wiping away fake blood "oh....ok....yeah that makes sense" they said sounding a little sad to which I just rolled my eyes.
I noticed a loose strand of hair fall out from behind their ear to which I took my hand and moved the hair from their face to which they looked right at me with wide eyes "sorry it annoyed me" I said resuming cleaning off the fake blood.
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Everyone skipped their first class since there had been no point in going if there was no teacher.
I went through my class barely able to pay attention since my headache had come back and the pain in my right eye had shown back up again.
When it was lunch time I spent my time down at the cafeteria listening to my usual music hoping my headache would go away, but then I felt someone come near me "You really like to annoy me huh....?" I said laying my head on the table "yeah" sid said laying their head down along with me, we stared at each other for a moment before we closed our eyes.
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I went on home feeling a little less miserable than usual.
I went to the door but didn't hear the usual screaming. I felt a little weirded out but I went inside and went to the room I usually hear the arguing from.
I opened the door and walked through, the first thing I saw was some blood splattered down on the ground, my eyes went wide as I saw blood dripping from the ceiling, I began to see my dad standing there with a gun and my mom on the ground lifeless with a bullet in between her eyes, she was covered in blood and her mouth was wide open.
I stood there teary for a second before saying "dad....?" I said shaking to which he turned around and looked at me angrily "what did you do....." I said teary and trembling, he then began to turn his gun and step closer to me as he did. I fell to the ground with tears filling my eyes. A second later he was dead on the ground like my mom.
I was left with two dead parents and a headache.
