When Kai walked outside the bathroom he searched the room with his wary gaze with hidden anticipation. He expected that by the time he was done with his shower, Lay would be gone and was doubting whether it wasn’t just some sick hallucination created by his tired out brain and he didn’t want to admit to feeling a sudden ache in his heart when he thought of the possibility that it wasn’t real. 

 

   But a swarm of butterflies tingled in his stomach when his eyes fell onto the man who curiously inspected every part of Kai’s room and was currently holding one of his childhood sketchbooks in his hands as he listed through the pages that were decorated by little drawings of mythical creatures. He stopped to admire a peculiar drawing of a red bird that was spread across two whole pages since little Kai ran out of space back then. 

 

   “If you ask me if it’s a red rooster, I will personally kick you out of the window,” Kai threatened, trying to hide his nervousness that the presence of the older man caused. He still wasn’t sure how to act around him.

 

   Lay let out a quiet chuckle and shook his head as his curious eyes scanned the page.

 

    “It’s a better phoenix than I would ever draw,” he noted and furrowed his eyebrows when the drawing reminded him of something. “Doesn’t Cassius have a similar tattoo?” 

 

   “Should I ask when did you get the chance to see my brother shirtless?” Kai raised his eyebrow and sat on his bed, drying his damp hair with a towel. 

 

   Lay  watched him with admiration written in his dark eyes with a sense of nostalgia swarming in his chest. Finally he got to see a version of Kai that seemed more like the one he was used to, wearing a loose black sleeping shirt with a pair of pajama pants instead of one of those expensive suits.

 

   “Uhm,” he cleared his throat when he was caught staring the moment Kai looked at him expectantly, waiting for him to answer the question. “We used to be quite close.”

 

   “You’ll have to be more specific if you don’t want to give me weird ideas.”

 

    “Why? Are you jealous?” Lay grinned playfully, reminding Kai of how unserious he could be no matter the situation. 

 

   “More like creeped out.” Kai shivered to add effect to his words. “I am already aware that the two of you were close in university but I don’t know the details.”

 

   “Well…” Lay hesitated, weighing his words. “It’s true that we were close. But our friendship was pretty rocky to be honest. The fact that Cassius was always one big secret didn’t really help and he was never an easy person to deal with. You remember how Liv talked about the marriage thing?”

 

   Kai nodded.

 

   “It all started there. Back then he said something to her that hurt her feelings and of course I took it pretty personally since she is my sister. But that wasn’t the reason for our falling out. It was later when he started to act differently and started to push me away. He never gave me a proper explanation for what happened or why he was like that,” Lay explained as he was pacing around Kai’s room, seemingly exasperated when he thought back to that time. 

 

   “When was that exactly?” Kai spoke out, already seeming to connect the dots. 

 

    “Maybe around six years ago? That’s when our friendship started to fall apart,” Lay replied and stopped in his tracks when he spotted Kai’s thoughtful expression.”Why?”

 

   “I think I know what the reason was. Or rather who,” Kai mumbled, chewing on his lip. 

 

   “Who?”

 

   “Me.”

 

   “What do you mean?” Lay furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. 

 

   “Around that time I came back from the boarding school and our mother passed away soon after. Since then the situation at home has been quite complicated,” Kai gave more details about the possible reason why Cassius was that way. “Cass officially took over the mafia clan and for some time even I wasn’t able to find my way to him since we both went through a lot.”

 

   “Oh…” Lay stood there in astonishment as the puzzle pieces slowly started to fit in. The reason why he was exiled from Cassius’ personal life and was not allowed to come visit him at the house as he used to was sitting right in front of him. The big secret that Cassius guarded as if it was a treasure of unfathomable worth.

 

   “He probably tried to keep away all possible threats ever since I came back.” Kai let out a deep sigh as he rubbed his tired face, finally having a clear picture of what actually happened between his brother and Lay. A sense of guilt washed over him when he realized how big of a factor he was when it came to Cassius’ decisions back then. His older brother probably did everything in his powers to protect him, even if  it cost him his own friendship. “I am sorry,” he mumbled into his hands where he was still hiding his face. 

 

   “You have no reason to apologize,” Lay exhaled and ran a hand through his jet black hair. After years he was able to make sense of the situation, taking a load off his mind.  “You know what I am angry about, though?”

 

   “What?” Kai looked up at him with a worried expression, fearing that he might’ve caused Lay to hold a grudge against him since he was the reason for all of that. 

 

   “If it wasn’t for your overprotective brother, we could’ve met much earlier,” Lay stated, shaking his head when that possibility came to his mind. The image of young Kai who was probably still a teenager at that time floated around, causing his lips to curve in a small smile. He would’ve loved to see that. 

 

    “Ah, trust me, You wouldn’t want to meet that version of me,” Kai scoffed and continued to rub his hair with the towel.

 

   “Why?” Lay made his way to him and sat on the bed next to him as he took away the towel and gently started to dry his soft hair, enjoying the opportunity to take care of him like he used to. 

 

    “Because if you think that I was hard to deal with back when we first met, then you would definitely hate the teenage version of me,” Kai chuckled and closed his eyes, enjoying Lay’s attentive care. 

 

    “Nonsense,” Lay disagreed. “Maybe I would have to give you a lecture or two but I am sure we would get along eventually,” he joked but soon his expression grew more serious. “I would still love to meet you earlier. We would have so much more time to spend together.” 

 

   “I doubt Cass would allow that,” Kai pointed out and Lay had to admit that he wasn’t wrong. “But I guess it was supposed to happen like that. If it wasn’t for the way things went back then I wouldn’t be at the island to save you, don’t you think.”

 

    Lay grunted in reply, his mind occupied by wondering what actually forced Kai to run away so far away from home, although he couldn’t find the courage to as. Just the fact that he was able to sit next to him like that made him the most fortunate man alive and he didn’t want overestimate his luck.

 

   “Lie down,”  Lay instructed when he finished drying Kai’s hair and grabbed the ointment that lay on the nightstand.

 

   After protesting for a while, the younger man allowed Lay to apply the ointment for him, not able to withstand the endless nagging and persuading. In the end, Kai resigned and laid on the side. Although he wouldn’t admit it, he was exhausted despite the fact that he took a nap right before his training session. But rather than physical, it was a mental exhaustion that was causing him to rub his tired eyes, while waiting for Lay to apply the ointment. 

 

   “What will you do now?” Lay asked as he gently lifted Kai’s shirt to reveal his bruised side, his eyes furrowed with concern. 

 

   “What do you mean?” He asked as he turned his head around to look at the dark haired man.

 

    “Well… You just appeared as the new head of the family, your brother is missing and you need to hold the clan from collapsing since there’s a threat of the others trying to take advantage of your family’s temporary weakness,” Lay summed up the situation at hand as his lips twitched in a smile when he noticed how Kai was shivering under his touch. He adored the way Kai’s body reacted to him. 

 

    “Thanks for reminding me of the fucked up situation I’m in,” Kai scoffed and tried to endure the pain when Lay pressed a little too hard while massaging the ointment into his sensitive skin that was decorated with a colorful bruise. 

 

    “Don’t worry. We are all here for you,” Lay assured him with determination to help Kai at all costs. The motivation he had to execute his duty as the second leader of their family was stronger than ever now that he knew that his ally was none other than the man his heart belonged to. He was willing to throw behind all the grudges he used to hold against the Villarreal family just to be able to support him.

 

    “Do I seem that hopeless as the new mafia boss?” Kai smirked bitterly. He knew that he made sure to play his role as perfectly as possible but he was interested to hear Lay’s opinion. After all, Lay was involved in the business way more than he ever was, not mentioning that he had much more experience as well. While Kai had only been allowed to observe from afar, Lay actually had a stable position as the second leader of the family who had a reputation that preceded him. 

 

   Lay shook his head with a soft chuckle as he said, “You seem to fit in quite well. You actually made me doubt whether you’re just a doppelganger of the person I got to know on the island.”

 

   “I’ll take that as a compliment,” Kai replied and pulled his shirt back down when Lay was done with applying the ointment. “Thank you.”

 

   “Oh but that wasn’t for free,” Lay grinned when he put away the ointment and had to laugh when he saw Kai’s confused expression. 

 

   But instead of giving him an explanation he leaned over to him, his head turned to the side to expose his cheek, indicating what he meant when he asked for a reward.

 

   Kai shook his head in amusement and after he hesitated for a moment, he planted a soft peck on Lay’s sharp jaw. 

 

   “It was a pleasure to do business with you, young master,” Lay uttered with a sheepish smile. 

 

   “Will you leave now?” Kai raised his eyebrows expectantly. He was slowly growing more worried that sooner or later someone would find out about this uninvited guest which wasn’t exactly the way he wanted anyone to find out about their relationship. 

 

    “Are you chasing me away again?” Lay pouted, not ready to leave just yet.

 

   “Lay,” Kai gave him a reprimanding look but the man refused to listen as he turned his face away, making it clear that he wouldn't budge. “Talay Sullivan,” Kai tried it again, this time using his full name that he still couldn’t get used to. 

 

    Lay turned to look at him once more. “Yes, Caelum Villarreal?” He raised his eyebrows ready to play this childish game, hoping it would buy him more time by Kai’s side. 

 

    Kai shook his head once again and let out a deep sigh in resignation. 

 

    “If they find you here, I will just say that you’re an intruder and let my bodyguards deal with you,” he declared, hoping to scare the shameless man away. 

 

    “Would you really do that?” Lay leaned closer to him with a provocative glint in his eyes.

 

    As their eyes met, the time seemed to stop for a moment. The surrounding world had blurred into meaningless haze as their eyes melted into each other. Neither of them dared to break the eye contact as they unconsciously leaned closer to each other, leaving just inches between their faces, holding their breath in anticipation. Kai’s heartbeat was deafening as he felt the anticipation rushing through his veins together with the sweet adrenalin that soon took over his brain. He wasn’t able to think, nor speak. All he managed to do was to gaze into those deep black eyes, as if he was staring into a dark abyss that reflected all his inner feelings that swarmed inside his chest.

 

    In that moment there was no past that would hurt his troubled heart, nor a future his brain would be preoccupied with. The only thing that existed for him was the pair of sparkling obsidian gemstones that reminded him of the night sky and the soft lips that found their way to his, as they brushed against the corner of his mouth, asking for permission.

 

    Kai was hesitating, letting their lips linger so close yet too far for them to touch. He was deliberating whether he wanted to make this choice and accept the free fall as his whole body tilted closer and closer to the man, who was patiently waiting without making another move. But Kai’s mind was blank as the only thought that found its way to his perception was how much he wanted to taste the sweet euphoria that was like a cursed voice beckoning him to come closer. To let go of his remaining concerns he was dwelling on and to surrender to his desire that was slowly burning up inside his chest. The small flame he thought was extinguished a long time ago by his grief once again blazed as if it was awakened by the presence of the man who created it in the first place. As if it knew its owner and was now calling for him.

 

    He wrapped his hands around the back of Lay’s neck and closed the distance between them, allowing their lips to meet in a tender kiss. He shifted his weight closer so he was now kneeling on the mattress, leaving Lay no choice but to tilt his head backwards to meet the height difference since he was still sitting on the edge of the bed. As his body stretched out, he carefully pulled Kai closer by his waist, forcing him to sit on his lap with his thighs wrapped around Lay’s sides, pressing him into his heated body.

 

   Lay’s tongue gently traced his upper lip, easing into the action a little bit to test the waters. To his surprise Kai immediately responded by reaching his tongue out to meet Lay’s, slipping it past his lips. Things from there only grew heavier as Lay found that comfort and confidence in himself to take control. He firmly grabbed Kai by his waist to keep him pressed against his body as he shifted their weight and laid him onto the mattress, hovering over him while his hand traced the curves of Kai’s body.

 

   They kissed like it was something that neither of them wanted to stop, taking short pauses to just softly smile at one another as a sign that they were still headed in the same direction. 

 

    Kai felt the happiness welling up in his chest, dopamine bursting through his brain to soothe his chaotic mind. 

 

    Lay’s kisses became more aggressive as he took control. But there was still a hint of tenderness in his touches, as he just wanted to savor Kai’s body for as long as he could. It was something they both needed. They needed to be close, they needed to touch each other, they needed their lips to meet not leaving any room to catch their breath.

 

   He looked into Kai’s pale blue eyes for a brief pause, who nodded in agreement, chest  rapidly rising up and down. The air grew heavier and hotter between them, burning inside their lungs. The oxygen diminished from the space around them.

    "I am still mad at you though," Kai blurted out in between their wet kisses. Contradicting his words, his body relaxed a bit, knowing how fast he was taking things but didn’t have the urge to slow down one bit. He embraced the free fall, knowing that when he opens his eyes, he will see the familiar dark blackness he loved to drown in.

 

    "I know," Lay brushed a hand through his messy hair and rested his forehead on his. "I’ll make sure to make it up to you. “I just want to enjoy this moment with you a little longer," he whispered, his deep voice quivering in confinement of his own lust.

 

    Kai’s lips curved in a small half smile as he hesitantly leaned forward and kissed him. 

 

    Lay’s eyes closed shut as he inhaled sharply, drowning in Kai’s familiar scent that mixed with the fresh smell of his body wash. He moved his lips in more confidence again, tender and honest as he gripped Kai’s hips, mindful of his injury. One of his hands slipped under Kai’s shirt, brushing over the smooth skin on his torso, feeling the heat that almost burned against his palm. His fingers traced the curves of his abdominal muscles, causing Kai to shiver under the soft touch as he let out a muffled moan. 

 

   Their bodies melted together, surrendering to the thrilling pleasure that none other could give them. Only for each other they were allowed to be so close, so intimate, so hungry. Just the two of them.