001- The First Love

"...Let's break up."

She has heard the same words several times before. Sad as it may sound, Janica wasn't that surprised. She remained quiet as she stirred her orange juice with her straw, signaling the man in front of her to continue with her eyes. Go on.

The brunette gulped, "There's someone," The man paused to see if there were any reaction from her, only to find none, so he continued, "I met her during my trip in Singapore. We've been seeing each other for a month and began dating for a week."

"I see."

Knowing that they've only been dating for a week caused a slight churn in Janica's stomach. At least, he was honest, or else, she would have ended up despising him. In all honesty, Janica had already figured it out before. From the way the man looked at her with guilty eyes and the broken smiles his been giving her during there last Friday date.

Her lack of reaction caused the man to worry. Looking at the fidgeting brunette caused a small smile to appear on Janica's face. This man, despite what he's doing, he was a good man. Not the good man he used to be, but still a good man. Nowadays, a good man is hard to find...and so is a good woman. She was glad that he decided to tell her this personally a week after he decided that the girl he loved was not her.

The brunette must have misunderstood her smile and immediately spoke up, "Nica—"

"When the opportunity comes, let me meet that person."

"Huh?"

"What I said," Janica chuckled, ignoring the quiet sounds of something breaking into pieces inside her chest. It was a familiar feeling. "So how is she? What does she do for a living? Is she beautiful?... Or is it a 'he'?"

"Are you my mother?" The brunette raised an eyebrow, eyes sparkling in amusement. Once again, he was reminded of the reason why he fell in love with this woman in the first place. Sadly, he could no longer love her now as much as he used to before.

She deserved a man who could give her the love she deserves. He thought he was that man.

Janica laughed, "Can't hand my ex-man to an incapable person after all."

Right, they were now each other's EX-lovers.

The brunette was surprised at how Janica took this revelation so easily. She probably didn't want to make a scene in front of the restaurant, but he expected to receive a hard slap on the face or at least, spill a few venomous words. He's probably the dick here—which he is—but her average Janica-towards-basically-anything reaction felt as if that one whole year together was...nothing.

"So that's it?"

"What do you mean?" Janica looked up from her phone.

"You're pretty chill about this. Which is weird because I was practically cheating on you!"

"Yeah," Janica nonchalantly agreed. "For a week."

"Don't I deserve like, at least, a few hits from you?" He asked. That way, some of his guilt will vanish. Janica was not going to let that happen.

"I'd do more than that if you told me this through text. That kind of shit pisses the hell out of me. But if you insist, I do feel a bit bitter right now," Janica admitted. "To be honest with you, I knew something was amiss ever since I picked you up from the airport. I'm aware that you needed to prepare yourself to tell me the truth so-hey, a fly's going to go in that mouth if you don't close it."

The brunette immediately closed his mouth.

"Sorry, I never really took you for someone perceptive."

"I wish!" Janica laughed.

And their conversation came to an end. It was uncomfortable, but Janica's carefree facade made it look like he told her he got her puppy. The ash-blonde was determined not to let this ruin her meal. She came here to eat dinner not to cry about a break-up.

When all the food was gone, they both picked up the napkins and dabbed it on their mouths. It was amazing how in sync the two were. This was probably the only visible evidence of how emotionally wrecked they are at the moment.

Janica just wanted to go home. He just wanted to make sure that everything was going to be alright for her in the end.

"So we're no longer dating..."

What an awkward way to once again begin the conversation. It was amazing how two pretty social people were now fumbling on what to say. It was probably only him, in the eyes of others. But Janica wasn't exactly functioning well on the inside either.

She just had more experience compared to him.

"Yes." She replied.

"Janica."

Goodbye, nickname.

"Yes?"

The man across her met her eyes with the most sincere pair of sapphire blue. He had a beautiful pair of eyes. It was one of everything that she loved. She had been mesmerized by them since the first time he asked her out, but right now, they looked duller in comparison to how she used to see it.

"Thank you for being my first love."

First love...

Those words were very familiar.

A forced bitter smile stretched across Janica's face. No, she'll really feel like the loser if she lets her tears fall right now. No matter what, she will not cry in front of the man who broke her heart.

"You're welcome."

Janica arrived home, looking very rough and haggard. She dropped her bag on the floor on the way to her room. The bedroom looked dark and depressing. Just like her. She didn't bother opening the lights because it was a waste of electricity and the moon's light was enough. She discarded all her clothes towards the direction of the laundry basket and for the first time, didn't bother checking whether her dress went in or not.

Janica breathed deeply before dropping on the floor. For the first time since the break up three hours ago, she finally allowed herself to shed tears. It was silent at first then she curled up into a pathetic ball and became a bawling mess. If people saw her like this, they'd probably freak out. You don't see a fully grown adult woman cry like a goddamn baby every day.

After crying for a whole hour, she was back to silently sobbing to herself. She cried until she was exhausted. She cried until her eyes were blood red. She cried even when there were no longer any tears left to shed anymore.

She was twenty when she had her first boyfriend. It was magical. She thought he was going to be her first and last, but in the end, they had to break up because it was getting in the way of their studies and also because they barely had any time to spend with each other.

Her second love was her girlfriend when she turned twenty-two. It was the most bittersweet relationship she has ever had. They loved each other very much, but their respective families were very persistent in separating them. It was the most painful break up she ever had.

Her third relationship was with a man she met at a bar. It was the shortest among all her relationships, but also the most passionate one among all. They broke-up through text. The guy had to take a trip to the hospital after that.

The fourth one was a younger man she met in a bakery when she was twenty-five. It was also one of the shortest, but he helped her throughout her depression. He was the only one she kept in contact with among all the people she previously dated.

The fifth time was a charming blue-eyed brunette she met during her cousin's wedding. They traveled together several times. They lasted for more than a year and was already talking about getting married. They were supposed to be engaged next month. They broke up today.

They were all very different, but they all were similar in one aspect.

She was their first love.