After Ceit had looked through some of Xia’s early motorcycle designs and found one she liked, one suited to long trips, with thick fitted seats and plenty of room for saddlebags. ‘Kind of clunky.’ Xia remarked, when Ceit picked it out. ‘You’re the one that designed it, Xi’ she replied snarkily, but there was a smile on her face as she looked at it. It was very different from Xia’s slim sporty model, but she loved it. It reminded her of a sturdy bull, immovable and solid. She wanted that solidity in her life, in herself, to have that steadfastness, to have resolve.
They had taken a walk through the yard, a heavy tool box in a wheelbarrow and a copy of their selected inventory in hand, digging up the skeletal rolling chassis from one section and looking for the engine in another. Xia showed her how to carefully remove parts without damaging the rest of the vehicles. It was surprisingly hard work, at least to Ceit, who was used to hard farm work and had expected this to be no different, but an hour in and her arms already ached. Sweat poured down her back under the sun, and Leuna had run back to the car to fetch her sunscreen for a second application and a snack. A couple other rebuilders had generously helped her and Xia get her parts back to the garage, Ceit gratefully, and perhaps a little overzealously thanked them. She was already exhausted.
They were rebuilding a carburetor when Xia said quietly, ‘I’m really glad you’re doing this with me, I thought you didn’t like me.’
Ceit hummed, thinking how to say what she wanted to say. ‘I never disliked you, it’s just. You were so close with Aelie. And you remind me of him.’ She knew her words were a little stilted, but it felt so good to say out loud, like a breath she had been holding for too long.
Xia released a heavy breath, his hands moving slowly and with great focus. ‘I hope you know that what he did, it was a surprise to me too. I didn’t expect that of him. It was also a betrayal for me, though it obviously pales to what you experienced. Maybe you didn’t know,’ he paused for a beat before continuing, seeming almost hesitant to continue ‘but I was the one that ended up killing him. Your parents were too frantic about you to be concerned about what happened to him, and Aelie’s were too distraught, too conflicted. Keris was going to do it, but I asked to instead. I was closest to him, and he deserved to be betrayed as well, for what he did. His parents still can't look at me. But, I…I was so angry. That he would hurt you, hurt our family like that. I’m sorry I remind you of him. You don’t deserve to be haunted like that.’ His hands had nearly stilled, slowly turning the heavy metal, his eyes were down, dark hair shadowing a somber expression.
Ceit was silent, mulling over the revelation. She hadn’t expected Xia to feel so strongly. She had known that the family had reacted harshly, and had been aware in a sort of hazy distant way that something must have happened to Aelie, but hadn’t really considered his fate too deeply. Her own tribulation had been so consuming she hadn’t had time or energy to consider what others might be going through. She had seen the grief of Aelie’s parents, but had just thought of it as the grief of parents that had been disappointed by their child. In retrospect it had been much too deep for just that, though they had hid it, perhaps ashamed to miss him just as much as they were ashamed of him. She wondered, for the first time, what they thought of her. If they resented her.
She felt a little warmed, a sense of fondness for Xia washing over her. Despite their general disposition, there were lots of small things about Xia that marked him as different from Aelie. His smile was a little softer, a little less wild, a little more grounded, a little more sincere. He had a peaceful atmosphere about him that Aelie never did. He was so easy to like.
‘Is that why you’re always so nice to me.’ She said in a small voice, she felt a little like a small flame of hope for a friendship had lit, delicate and in danger of being blown out at any moment.
He looked up, startled. ‘I…I don’t know, maybe a little?’ He sounded anxious, his voice rising in pitch at the end. ‘That doesn’t mean I don’t like you, you’re a really great person.’ His voice gained more strength. ‘I’m nice to you because you deserve to be treated well. You’re my family and I’ll always take care of you.’ He sounded so earnest and genuine. Like a pledge. The flame of friendship burned brighter, and the ache in her chest from Aelie’s betrayal unwound.
They left the salvage yard several hours later, Leuna driving back to pick up the kids from school, while Xia offered to drive Ceit back on his bike, so he could start to show her how to drive one of her own. They had dug up some safety gear from some of Kov’s old things. ‘Back in my youth,’ she said wryly, passing them along as she and Xia walked Ceit through a bike precheck.
According to Xia, rebuilding could take months, if not years, though he assured her that her bike was in a much more developed stage than his had been when he started, and that she would have the help of him and the expertise of Kov. She felt a prickle of nerves at the possible delay. She needed to talk to Ovu. And she would eventually have to tell her family. She had no idea what their reaction would be.
‘Do you mind if we don’t go back right away?’ She asked as they grabbed some early dinner from a corner noodle shop, its overhanging curtain spangled, fluttering in the slight breeze.
‘Sure,’ Xia said. Or at least that’s what he seemed to be trying to say through his mouthful of noodles. ‘Why are you so gross?’ Ceit griped, handing him a handful of napkins with a baleful look. He wiped his mouth, not remotely cowed.
‘What do you want to do in the city, do you want to try out driving? Because I really think we should take you out to the farm before you give it a try. And maybe not on my bike.’ Ceit groaned ‘I’m not looking to damage your bike, you can calm down. Though I wouldn’t say no to a little driving back up at the farm, with your supervision, of course. But no, I want to go see Ovu, if it’s ok.’ Xia gave her a quizzical look. ‘Ovu? What do you want with that fussy old relic? We just saw him, I was kind of hoping not to have to see him until next month.’ ‘Wow, you really don’t like him,’ Ceit giggled. Xia grimaced into his noodles. ‘Well, he’s never liked me either, always looking at me with that, you know, that look of superiority he has.’ Ceit smirked. She was very familiar with that look. ‘Xia. That’s just his face.’ ‘Yeah, well, I don’t like it.’ He pouted, petulant, a face that made much more sense on someone much younger than him. Ceit burst out laughing.
