My name is Nayru. It’s not the one my parents gave to me, but it’s the one I chose. And I think that makes it even more special and fitting.

I squinted as the wind blew more sand into my face. Pulling up the azure scarf I wore over my mouth and nose, I looked west toward the village I longed to call my home. It might be the only place in Hyrule where I could feel welcome. . . depending on a couple things.

Today was supposed to be her arrival. I’d planned it for months now, requesting an audience with the Lightning Sage as she came into Kara Kara Bazaar. It would be her last stop before Gerudo Town and my only chance to make a plea for sanctuary.

“Nayru, if you keep watching the sand you’ll drive yourself crazy. Come over here and help me stack these melons,” a familiar voice said.

Sighing and turning back to one of the only friends I’d made at Kara Kara Bazaar, I did as she asked, setting up a bottom layer of melons on her red rug that kept her wares off the sand. From there, I stacked each piece, feeling the cool, wet fruit in my fingers. I’d eaten a shit ton of these when I arrived in the desert and still went through more than the average Hylian to stay hydrated.

“You’re still nervous?” the merchant asked beside me.

Her name was Liruf, and she’d befriended me as I visited her stall to buy melons every morning. She didn’t seem to take much interest in other customers, but then again, most of them were just other Gerudo passing through the desert on their way to and from Gerudo Town.

Liruf was about a foot shorter than me with lime-green eyes and brown skin. She kept her red hair cut short so it didn’t blow wildly in the desert wind that was so common morning, day, and night. The merchant wore white pants with gold symbols and trim that cut off at the knee. And the matching white and gold top she wore left her midriff exposed. Each of her pointed ears were pierced with danging gold rings that didn’t seem to bother her in the least.

It left me confused because she said hair blowing in the wind would bother her, and yet, the earrings didn’t. Still, I didn’t question it. She’d been kind to me and was the only person in the oasis who knew why I’d spent weeks here.

“Yeah. . . my heart won’t stop pounding,” I said. “I’ve got to ask your leader for sanctuary and not get arrested or thrown out in the process, Liruf. That’s a lot of pressure. And if she says ‘no’—”

The merchant grabbed my hand with each of her own, which froze me midsentence. Her touch was warm as the midday sands around us.

“She’s not going to say ‘no.’ I keep telling you, Riju is a kind and understanding leader. You haven’t seen her compassion like I have,” Liruf said.

“With all due respect, I’m sure you’ve seen her compassion toward other women. Not. . . people like me,” I said.

Liruf frowned as I tried to look off into the sand again, feeling my heart sink with the impossibility of what I had to ask. And fuck me, I probably wouldn’t even get the chance to ask. Because what stranger just walked in off the street and gets an audience with the leader of an entire people?

The merchant squeezed my hand until it began to hurt a little, and when I flinched, looking back at her, she said, “Hey, we talked about this. You are a vai, Nayru. I know some days you struggle to see it. I know your family back in Hateno didn’t see it. But I see it. I saw it the first day you walked up to my stall and bought a ridiculous amount of melons.”

Dysphoria had been an absolute bitch this day of all days. How was I supposed to convince the Gerudo leader I was a girl when I struggled to see it myself on days like today? I’d wake up, look in the mirror of my room at the inn, and just feel this insatiable desire to start clawing at my face, hoping that if I dug deep enough, I might find the face of a woman buried somewhere underneath.

And if not, hey, a skeletal face would be pretty difficult to misgender, right? If I walked around with nothing by bone and empty eye sockets, I was pretty sure nobody would call me “sir” or “mister” ever again. I’d be exclusively called “it” and “monster” until they ran a spear through my chest and put me out of my misery.

Squeezing my hand again and yanking me out of my thoughts was a bothersome and persistent friend I’d only known for a month. She was kinder to me than I could ever imagine deserving. And today, like most days, she was going to keep me from drowning in a sea of angst and depression.

“Hey! Whatever you’re thinking, stop it, Naryu. You listen to me, you valid little vai. From your obscenely long blue hair to your gold-painted toenails, you’re a woman, okay? And when you meet with Riju, she’s going to let you into Gerudo Town. The moment she does, I will find you a place to live, and you can start that new life you’ve been dreaming of for years. Now, who are you?”

Oh great. The affirmations, I thought. I hate how effective this shit is because it’s embarrassing.

“I’m. . . Naryu,” I muttered.

The Gerudo merchant held a hand to her ear, ring danging over her fingers.

“I said, I’m Naryu.”

She let go of my hand and placed one of hers over my heart. I shivered at her warm touch, which she’d not done before through the dozens of affirmations she ran through with me as I waited for Riju’s caravan.

“And what beats inside of you, Naryu?” Liruf asked.

When I didn’t answer, she repeated the question louder and raised an eyebrow.

Sighing, I met her fierce gaze and said, “The heart of a vai.”

The merchant nodded and asked her last question.

“So what are you going to do today, little vai?”

Taking a deep breath and puffing out my chest, complete with frustratingly small breasts that refused to grow much, I said, “I’m going to make a new home in Gerudo Town.”

At last, Liruf grinned and clasped her hands as she stared at me. Behind her, a small flock of brownstone quails ran off into the desert as the sands began to clear, and the wind died down.

“And I’ll be with you every step of the way,” the Gerudo merchant said.

That finally brought me out of my dark thoughts and summoned a tiny smile to my face. I finished stacking the fruit for Liruf and sat beside her while she made a few sales with customers passing through Kara Kara Bazaar.

An hour went by, and I heard a Hylian man start to argue with a different Gerudo merchant about the price of arrows she was selling. He raised his voice and started shaking his hands, yelling about how he was the cousin of this leader and the brother of that mayor.
I flinched as he got right up in the face of the Gerudo merchant he was arguing with, and Liruf put a hand on my knee.

“That’s not you, Nayru. You’re nothing like him,” she whispered.

It didn’t take long for a couple of Gerudo soldiers to escort him out of the Kara Kara Bazaar while he screamed about how he would be sending letters to very important people in Tarrey Town about this.

When the guards walked by on their way back, they stopped by to purchase a couple of melons. I think their names were Soguf and Fetila. One wiped her forehead as another warm breeze stirred through the oasis, causing ripples in the lake.

“Sarqso,” Fetila said, handing a few green rupees to Liruf.

Soguf waved at me with a smile as I sat there, and I tried hard not to flinch. I didn’t want to attract any extra attention to myself. So I just waved back, much more stiff than I would have liked.

“That’s a cute skirt,” Soguf said, motioning toward my legs. “Where did you get it?”

The skirt was powder blue, and it hung loosely under my teal blouse, which was tied off under my ribs with thin gold ropes.

“Oh, thank you,” I said, struggling to find my voice. “I think this skirt came from Castle Town Market. I bought it a couple months ago at the start of summer.”

The guard nodded and said, “I’ve heard Queen Zelda has been busy getting the town rebuilt in the years since the Upheaval. To think she has the place cleared out of monsters and a market established so soon? It’s truly something.”

I merely nodded at this, and Soguf and Fetila each said “Sav'aaq,” taking their leave. Giving them another stiff wave, I waited until they were out of earshot and asked, my friend a common question.

“How was my voice?” I asked.

She shrugged.

“I’ve talked to you every day for a month now, Naryu. You know what I’m going to say when you ask these after every conversation with a vai. When you speak, I just hear a woman talking.”

That is what she says every time, I thought.

“Do you think they heard a woman talking?” I asked.

Again, Liruf shrugged as a new customer started to approach.

“I think they liked your skirt, you silly little vai.”

That earned my friend another little smile. And I watched as Liruf’s Goron customer bought oil for his lantern. He said his name was Dalage, and he was heading into the desert to sketch some rare flowers for his art book. We wished him luck, and he smiled at me before leaving.

People in the desert sure are more friendly than they were back home, I thought, taking in another breath of warm sandy air and stretching.

As the sun grew closer to the horizon and took on a pinkish hue to say goodnight, we heard a commotion just outside of the bazaar. It sounded like shouts of battle and clanging weapons. Everyone got up to run and look, standing at the edge of town. Nobody wanted to get closer.

In the chaos of battle, I spotted about a dozen Gerudo soldiers doing their best to fight off twice as many warriors that seemed to melt out of the shadows. They wore tight burgundy armor with joints painted black or brown. Their faces were all covered with uniform white masks. Each had an open eye with three small triangles under it painted in red.

“Oh shit. Those are Yiga!” I heard one of the merchants say.

“What are they doing here?” Dalage asked, standing behind me.

The battle continued, and it looked like the Yiga were gaining the upper hand, Gerudo blood spilling into the sand, dripping down the scythes and blades of the masked attackers. But that’s when a large bolt of lightning arced out of the sky and smashed into a group of five Yiga. They screamed in agony as their electrified bodies writhed and hit the floor.

That’s when I saw her draw twin curved blades and storm into battle, shoulder-length red hair under a gold headdress. A gray and white skirt dancing in the evening wind with small rings dangling at the bottom. A gold belt on top of the skirt secured two matching scabbards at the fighter’s back.

What little sunlight was left reflected from the gold on her necklaces and armor. As the young warrior blocked an attack from two Yiga at the same time, I saw her olive eyes painted with a brownish-red shadow.

There was a fierceness in those eyes, one that matched the lightning she called with each snap of her fingers.

“Riju. . .,” I muttered, watching her cut down her two attackers.

“Buliara! Take Inene and back up our rear. We’re being flanked from multiple sides,” Riju ordered.

The large bodyguard that was said to follow her Gerudo leader everywhere hesitated for a moment, blocking an attack with her oversized blade. And then she reluctantly followed the order, leaving Riju alone to strike down three more Yiga with another clap of thunder and flash of lightning.

The fight continued for several more minutes, each group appearing evenly matched. But the Yiga weren’t meant for long drawn-out combat. They were more suited for ambushes and quick assassinations. So long as the Gerudo fought, they could outlast their opponents.

At last, Riju and her fighters gained the upper hand, and most of the Yiga had vanished into puffs of smoke and dust, leaving behind piles of bananas and the occasional rupees. I raised an eyebrow, trying to figure out what that was all about.

The Gerudo leader was covered in sand and sweat, as well as the blood of her enemies. She didn’t have a single cut on her, a testament to the rigorous training she underwent to keep her people safe. And I felt a longing in my heart at that moment. What I would give to be someone a powerful leader fought to keep safe.

Since coming out, I hadn’t found a safe haven anywhere. At the start of my journey, I drew looks at every stable and inn. Some outright refused to rent me a room, leaving me to fend for myself in the elements. They had hateful words for me I wouldn’t repeat, but each one felt like a dagger jabbed into my heart.

I lost track of the nights I spent by a fire, crying into the night sky, wishing a Yiga might pass by and put me out of my misery. Eventually, things got a little better. I got an enchanted scarf from a Great Fairy that hid my facial hair. I learned about this great city in the desert that only welcomed women and set my heart on somehow living there. And I stumbled across a woman just like me at a place called Lookout Landing.

In the shade of a massive tower that the legendary swordsman was said to use from time to time as he flew through the sky, Mephe taught me everything she’d learned. She’d come out a decade ago and even had a husband now. They lived in Castle Town together.

Mephe taught me how to mix certain herbs that would change my body in subtle ways, thinning muscle, changing smells, restoring the emotions I’d lost years before, and even growing small breasts. Though, apparently that last part had worked much better for her. She also taught me how to mix yak’s milk and pie filling once a day to thicken the fat in my thighs and ass for more feminine curves.

This goddess-sent woman couldn’t help me much with my voice, but she did give me a few breathing and singing exercises to get started down that path. Put simply, I owed my life to that chance meeting. A few months later, I’d finally reached Kara Kara Bazaar. And now Riju was here!

My heart was rocking and rolling in my chest like a Goron miner smashing rock in every direction. And just as things started to settle down, I felt my heart catch in my throat. One of the Yiga who’d been blasted with lightning was slowly getting up. Nobody seemed to notice him yet.

He pulled out a pair of daggers, slowly raised his arm, and aimed the Lightning Sage. Someone shouted her name, but it was too late. The bastard had already pulled back his arm and let the knives fly.

Their target was the very woman I’d come here to see, and I panicked as they whistled through the air. At the last second, another Gerudo dove in front of her leader and took both blades to her chest.

She collapsed in the sand with a sickening thud, instantly pouring blood and coughing it up as well.

Buliara drove her large sword through that Yiga’s stomach, and he fell over dead, vertical ponytail flopping in the desert wind.

“Sa'oten!” Riju yelled, sheathing her blades and rushing to help her savior. “Tamouk! Tamouk, are you okay? Someone come help us!”

Several Gerudo soldiers rushed over and circled their fallen comrade. I heard cries of pain and exclamation as I leaped into action, rushing across the sand as fast as my legs would carry me. Behind me, Liruf yelled my name. I ignored her, running. Just running. I had to get over there.

A few of the soldiers saw me approaching and picked up their weapons. But I waved my arms and shouted, “Healer! I’m a healer! Move, please!”

This was one of the few things I could do right. I’d been able to do it since I was a child, my only real marketable skill aside from occupying space and crying when my brain said mean things to me.

They hesitated, but Riju yelled, “Let her pass! You there, Hylian! Save my friend.”

I ran up and kneeled, eyeing the wounds which looked so much worse up close. All thoughts of the future aside, I had to live in this moment here and now. A life hung in the balance, and my needs and wants fell aside.

Her life liquids pouring into a sticky puddle, I saw Tamouk’s eyes fluttering as she came in and out of consciousness. I could tell Riju wanted to pull out the daggers buried in her chest, but she waited for my instructions.

“Water,” I said. “I need all your water.”

The Gerudo all produced flasks and skins full of it, and I instructed them to pour it over my hands and Tamouk’s wounds. They hesitated, looking to Riju who merely nodded. Every soldier overturned their container and drenched the wound with water as I asked. When it hit my hands, I called forth an inner ability I’d inherited from my grandmother.

Fish-like scales on my elbows and forehead started to glow an aquamarine hue as I summoned every ounce of rejuvenating energy I had within me.

I wasn’t as fast a healer as the zora, but with enough time and water, I could produce similar results with my talent. Placing my glowing hands on the wounds and feeling water and blood mix under my touch, I closed my eyes.

“Come on. . . come on. . . hang in there, Tamouk,” I muttered.

The wounds did not immediately close, and some of the Gerudo exchanged worried looks. Sweat poured down my forehead. This wasn’t easy in normal circumstances but in a dry desert with a small water supply to work with? It took everything I had to start the healing process.

With a deep sigh, I felt Tamouk’s blood slowly pull back into her body, separating itself from the sand. When the puddle of blood had mostly vanished, I focused on knitting the skin closed once more. That was the harder part.

But I kept at it for the next half hour, watching the guard’s brown skin inch back together, and the Yiga daggers eventually fall harmlessly to the side.

By the time I was finished, and Tamouk regained consciousness, the water was gone, and night had fallen over the desert.

Tamouk groaned and stirred as Buliara helped Riju’s savior to her feet. She was shaky, as was I.

Riju threw her arms around the Gerudo and said, “Sarqso,” over and over again. Though whether to Tamouk or Hylia herself I had no clue.

When the Gerudo leader finally let Tamouk go, she looked at me and nodded.

“You did a great thing today, Hylian. Though I must admit, I’ve never seen a Hylian do that before. You acted more like a Zora in the moment. And the scales on your forehead are still glowing a little. So tell me. . . how did you save my friend?”

This. . . wasn’t the circumstance I expected to be speaking with Riju. All the rehearsed lines I’d been practicing over the last month to make an intelligent plea seemed to have evaporated like the water I’d used. What was left except for me to answer her question?

“My grandmother was a Zora, Lightning Sage. My mother is half Zora. My father and grandfather are both Hylians. It seems a little Zora blood and ability remained by the time I was born,” I said, bowing my head.

Riju nodded and instructed everyone to move into the Kara Kara Bazaar and find shelter. We walked back, and I watched as guards that had been stationed nearby set up large tents for Riju’s caravan that’d recently returned from the new castle Queen Zelda was constructing.

I lingered near Liruf eating melons to rehydrate after such a draining use of my magic. We didn’t talk much. I think I was still in shock over the events of the day.

Buliara came over and told me Riju wanted a word. Liruf wasn’t allowed as the Gerudo leader meant for this to be a private conversation. That left me crippled with fear. And Buliara didn’t seem keen to take “no” for an answer.

Liruf flashed me a smile and motioned for me to take a deep breath. My heart was back in rattling mode again, making it hard to take that deep breath. But I followed Buliara silently anyway.

We came to a smaller tent not far from the lake’s edge, and Buliara opened the flap, motioning for me to go inside. A few purple pillows and a blanket had been set up inside, with a small fire and a clay teapot.

“Sav'saaba,” Riju said, motioning for me to sit. My heart once again in my throat, I didn’t know what else to do. It was either sit on the pillow before the Gerudo leader I’d been planning to plead for an audience with or run screaming into the desert and hope a gibdo found me. I chose the former. . . somehow.

Riju passed me a rather earthy tea that I silently sipped, lowering my scarf. Buliara took a cup as well, setting her sword against the tent wall.

“So. . . mystery Zora/Hylian healer. You saved the life of a dear friend today. I’ve asked around the bazaar, and word is you’ve been hanging out here for a while. No one had anything bad to say about you, of course. Just that you had a funny habit of staring off into the sand. . . either toward my town or back toward Zelda’s new castle.”

Why did I think Riju wouldn’t be able to find out things about me here? My shock must have been apparent because the Lightning Sage laughed and took another sip of her tea.

“You’re not a common sight in the desert. So don’t look so surprised that I’d immediately check up on you. I guess the only real question I can’t answer is why are you here, stranger?”

I eyed Buliara’s sword. Not sure why, but maybe my brain thought she’d slay me if my answer wasn’t satisfactory.

“Oh, you’ve no need to fear Buliara. She follows me everywhere. And I know your hands aren’t capable of even the tiniest shred of violence, healer. So I’ll ask again. Why are you here?”

Okay. . . this is it. Speak your peace, or get up, walk out of this tent, and never dream of living in Gerudo Town again, I thought.

I took a deep breath and somehow felt as though I were being squeezed by the world’s strongest moblin.

“My name is Naryu. And I’ve been waiting here. . . to plead with you for sanctuary, Lady Riju,” I said.

The Lightning Sage motioned for me to continue.

Well, I haven’t been arrested yet, I thought. Might as well.

“Hyrule. . . isn’t a safe or friendly place to people like me. I was born with the body of a boy, but I’ve never really felt like one,” I said, trying not to choke up. “From a young age, I’ve always known that I had the heart, spirit, and mind of a woman inside of me. I’ve taken steps to change a few things about my body and live as one at the cost of my own. . . well, everything.”

Riju’s face wore a neutral expression, which didn’t exactly give me tons of confidence this was going well.

“My family disowned me, and my village pretty much banished me for choosing to express myself in the way I do. And Gerudo Town feels like. . . maybe my last chance to have a home where I can live safely?”

Buliara coughed, and I flinched.

“I understand if you don’t feel comfortable granting my request. If you say no, I’ll promise not to bother you again. But should you grant me sanctuary, I promise to abide by any laws and guidelines of your city. I’ll keep quiet and use my healing talents to help any sick or injured Gerudo. I’ll strive to learn your language and respect every aspect of your culture, Lady Riju. So please. . . give me a chance to find a home away from a world that cast me aside for things I had no control over.”

At this, I bowed my head down to the ground, setting my tea aside.

Silence filled the tent as the Lightning Sage and her bodyguard exchanged glances. At least, she spoke.

“We do not permit voe in our city, Naryu,” Riju said with a firm tone. And I felt like I wanted the sand to swallow me up here and now. My stomach sank to the Depths, and I resigned myself to never having a home.

I wouldn’t beg any further. And I wouldn’t cry in front of Riju. I didn’t want her to think I was trying to manipulate her. It took every ounce of energy I had to hold it together as I raised my head, chin still lowered in defeat.

“I understand,” I said, quietly, placing my half-empty teacup back near the kettle. “Thank you for your time, Lady Riju.”

But as I stood up, I felt Buliara’s hand on my shoulder. She gently pushed me back down onto the pillow.

“It’s rude to leave when our lady is still speaking,” the bodyguard said, removing her hand. She felt like she had enough strength in each finger to crush a boulder.

I turned toward Riju unsure of what to expect.

“We do not allow voe into Gerudo Town. So tell me, Naryu. What are you?” she asked.

How could I answer that question? Was it a trick? Some Gerudo riddle I didn’t understand the meaning of? Then I remembered Liruf’s affirmations. The ones she’d made me practice each day for the last month. And I took a risky shot.

“I’m. . . a vai,” I said, trying not to make it sound like a question.

Buliara sneezed.

Riju’s eyes locked with my own, and she said, “If you tell me you’re a vai, Naryu, then you are a vai. From this day forward, you shall have sanctuary within my city. Welcome to Gerudo Town, my Hylian sister.”