Click click

“You have got to be kidding me! This is totally bullshit”

I read each chapter quickly, getting more annoyed as the story progresses

“I get that this is a smut, that this is just a wishful fulfillment story, but you can at least ground some of this shit within real life!”

I talk to the computer screen, voicing out my complaints. Not like anyone will even hear em or care for that matter

“Ugh, I have no reason to complain, this was free and even though I hate to admit it, I might act just like the main character, fucking every girl in my sight. I just find it hard to believe that all his sisters and even his mother want a piece of his meat. Where's the fucking context? Why do they like him that way?!”

I then glanced at the time

“It's already 7 am? Guess I should get dressed”

After grabbing some work appropriate clothes, usually blue jeans, a white shirt and a random type of button up shirt. I rush to the bathroom and freshen myself up in the shower. As I wash myself up, I feel my body up. Fat, fat and more fat.

“Ever since they went on without me, I just let myself go. Haaaaa, I should really get my shit back together. It's been 10 years already”

I shake my head and brush the soap and shampoo off my body. I grab some toothpaste. While I brush my teeth, I fix my brown hair with my other hand. Then I wipe the water out of my ocean colored eyes.

After getting dressed, I walk in front of the family cabinet

“Good morning Mom, Dad, and little princess. I hope your day in heaven will be full of happiness and wonder”

I look at the family picture lovingly.

“Don’t worry mother, I promise I'm still eating healthy. And yes dad, I will bring my girlfriend to meet you all. Just let me get one first alright? Little princess, I’ll make you my favorite meal for dinner today. Nothing is better than a fully loaded burger. I just know that you’ll love it”

After fighting back the tears I say my final goodbye

“Cya later everyone”

With a whisper out to the empty house, I locked the door behind me.

While walking down the street, I think about the web novel I read this morning. Recently reading has been my way of escaping the world. Going into many different worlds within my fingertips. Forgetting about the everyday mundane life

“Going to an alternate world. Where the morals of men and women are flipped. That does sound wonderful”

I imagine what I would do if I was lucky enough to wake up one day in a world like that. What would I do? Would I turn out like all the guys and fuck everyone in sight? I’m not sure. I would say yes. But sex with no love involved just doesn't feel that good. It's the love and affection, doing something so intimate with your loved one that makes it wonderful.

As my mind wonders, I hear my name get called

“Good morning Levi. How are you on this wonderful morning?”

“Today is indeed a wonderful day. Glad to know you feel the same!”

I reply back to the voice. As I turn around I see my coworker. Blonde hair, thin body, and back in the old days, a ladies man. Or so I hear

“How is your wife? You're expecting soon right?”

A bright smile go across his face

“Yes! My little girl. I can’t wait to hold her!”

As I watch his bright smile, I feel my chest slowly tighten up. A family huh.

As we chat, we walk into the building and go to our desks. After hooking up my headset and turning on my PC. I open up the team messages and see what's on today's agenda

“Lets see, in the morning I’m on the help desk, then in the afternoon I'm repairing the stuff we have in the back”

Once I write down my schedule in my notepad, I get a few drinks from the nearby cooler and start the long work day

And boy was it long. Getting screamed at by morons who can’t understand the difference between right or left. To people who can’t read the manual given to every product the company sells

“Fuck this man”

I complain out loud to the blonde coworker as we leave the building

“Yeah, but the money's good. You wanna go to the bar tonight?”

I think for a bit. I don’t drink, but hanging out with coworkers could be fun. However today is that day

“Sorry, not today. Thanks for inviting me though!”

I wave goodbye and start my lonely walk home. As I walk I enter the nearby store and buy the things I need for dinner. Today’s a wonderful day…eh?

Before I knew it, I was already at my house. I take one more deep breath and walk in

“I’m back”

With silence as my answer, I walk to the family cabinet

“Hey everyone. I will be visiting you all soon”

With one more loving look, I walk to the kitchen and start prepping for dinner. The TV on with the local news

“Be careful everyone, there's a new fad going around called clowning. Clowning is when people dress up as well, clowns, and scare random people. Even though it was weird, it started out as a prank. However recently, these clowns are now physically assaulting others at night. It is also spreading worldwide. I just don’t understand these people”

I click the remote and change the channel. The last thing I need today is a negative news article. True or not, it doesn't involve me. I’m not some handsome, attractive guy with a face that could steal peoples heart, nor am I a sexy young thang that woos the stupid men in the world. I'm just a no-body

With these thoughts coming and leaving my brain, I refocused on my burgers. After making the hamburger meat into balls, I grab a frying pan and put the stove to high heat. After a few minutes, I take one of the balls and put it in the hot pan. I then grab my spatula and flatten it. Afterwards I put on my seasoning. Normally it’s onion, salt, pepper, and garlic powder. But today I added a little paprika to add a nice hidden spicy hit. I wait 5 minutes then flip it for another 5.

“Man, I love how easy it is to make smash burgers. They are thin, juicy, and take 20 minutes to make them”

It takes me about an hour to make them all. Looks like I bought too much meat again. After complimenting on how much food I should bring, I make 5 burgers in total. I wrap them up and put them in a bag

Once I cleaned up the kitchen, I went back to my room and took a quick shower, putting on my formal, dress clothes.

“Okay, I can do this Levi, just make sure not to cry in front of them”

Once I prepared myself, I grabbed the bag of food and made my way to the cemetery. Once I get closer, I see an older couple at my family's grave

“Good afternoon Mr. and Mrs. Smith. It’s nice to see you again this year”

With a lonely smile, I call out to them. Even though I say it's nice to see them. That's a complete white lie. They already made up the sin they have committed. Seeing them now just brings up emotions I buried deep within myself. There's no reason or need to bring those dark emotions into the world. There's enough darkness as is.

“It’s nice to see you again too, Levi…Look I know I said it every year but -”

“Stop, please. I know you never meant it to happen”

After a moment of silence, Mrs. Smith broke it

“Your right sweetie. I’m glad that your so understanding. But please let my husband to say it. Even though he says it every year. It will tear him up otherwise”

I wanted to say more, but I know Mother and Father would roll in their grave if I make things hard on them. They were not bad people, just made a really stupid decision that cost me my family, and them, well, years in prison and a lifetime of guilt. It's debatable who is suffering more right now.

“Alright, I don’t blame you for what happened. I blame the poison that was in your bloodstream at the time”

I watch Mr. Smith eyes water. Great, tears. Fuck me. Please don’t man. I promised myself that I’ll never let them see me cry

After he took a moment to get his emotions back under his control, his eyes went from me to my family's grave

“It may have been the reason why I crashed into their car, but it was my stupid-ness that allowed it in me in the first place….Like I promised them and my family, I haven't touched that shit since that day”

He then looks back at me

“And I will never touch it again. Ever”

With a smile, I nod my head. I know he meant it

After a few more back and forth, the old couple lay down the flowers and gave my family one more prayer before walking away, Mr. Smith silently crying as they left

I take a moment before I walk in front of the grave. After putting down the food, I read the engraved message

-A wonderful, loving, and caring childhood lovers-

-Kristal Gold 35-

-Gorge Gold 33-

-Princess Gold 6 months-

“Hey everyone. I hope you don’t mind that I came a little late today”

A soft smile on my lips as I sit down

“I got some homemade food this year too. I always regret that we only ate take-out when you three were still here”

I then take out the burgers, putting each one on a plate

“One for mother, one for dad, and one for you little sister”

I they give a small prayer before destroying my two burgers. Even though they were cold, the hidden spice added a nice little spark in my mouth

After I finishing eating, I threw away all the garbage and sit back down. Staring absently at the concrete block

I had so much I wanted to say. Why did this happen to you? Why couldn't you at least tell me my sister’s name. I had them put down princess. Why.…why….fuck

I wipe my eyes, stopping my tears from dropping

“Haaaa, I guess I’ll give you all an update with my current life”

With a deep sigh, I lay down next to the grave. This will be a long talk. I got a year to go over

“I currently work a desk job, I know, me, a desk job. I was always active and in every sport but the pay is really good……I’m still overweight. I know I promised that I’ll watch myself, but….yeah I don’t have any excuses, sorry……My coworker is having a daughter apparently. I know that she will be a heartbreaker when she gets older, based on who her parents are…..”

With my thoughts wondering, I start to blabber about everything and anything. As I stare at the sky, it slowly turns to black, stars and other lights over take the pervious endless blue

Before I realized it, my vision quickly blurs. I guess I was more exhausted than I thought. Keeping my emotions in control today was a little bit harder than normal

Once I close my eye, the soft green grass becomes extremely cozy, all the random background noise turn off, and I feel myself going into a deep sleep

“Yeah, I’ll rest for a bit here, I am really tired. I hope I have a good dream. Maybe one where everyone was still alive? Haha”

As I speak this out, I suddenly hear someone talk over me

“Okay fatty, I’ll help you dream. Dream forever at least! MAHAHA. Now that was a good joke right guys?”

*SLAM*

I feel something hard slam against my head, but before I can register the pain or the fact that something just hit me, everything goes black