Journal Entry #1

I don’t know who will read this. Ideally? Hopefully? Nobody. I mean, journals aren’t meant to be read by others unless you ask them to, after all. So, if you’re reading this and have any sort of qualms about personal details being only shared when their owner wants them to be shared, thank you for getting this far, but please put this down now.

But since you’re probably reading a weird bunch of papers with…admittedly really bad handwriting (turns out it’s hard to write with stubby padded fingers and makeshift pens made out of plant dye and ‘Grunger’ bones.

Oh, actually, if you don’t know what a ‘Grunger’ is yet, maybe I do want you to read this. Hang on. Wait, also, if you can read this, you also know what ‘English’ looks like.

Let me start over.

My name is Mei. No last name. I guess Felyn don’t have a sense of ‘family’, at least not in that way. When you’re born, you’re part of the clutter. Er, pack, like wolf-pack. We get raised in a community, sort of, and socialize that way. I have ‘parents’ but the term doesn’t mean all the stuff it’d probably mean to you?

That’s not important, sorry. Anyway, I started this journal, insisted on it even, to the others, because…one night, I just ‘remembered’. Who I used to be. What I used to be. How I used to be. ..Sort of.

Okay, how do I describe this.

…Anime terms. I HOPE you know what anime is, or this won’t make any sense. So, in an isekai, someone gets torn from their world and put in another. In reincarnation isekai, a person…um. Dies. But then they’re born again, or awaken in another world, in a brand new body.

So, that’s what happened to me, I guess. I…can’t remember the details, and everything is really fuzzy. I do remember…I was human. I also remember I…didn’t used to go by she/her, but wanted to. Wanted to so badly, but felt I couldn’t. But now I…can. Easily. …Okay, that’s enough of that…

I also remember other things. Computers. Video Games. Netflix. Anime. An ever-worsening political climate. Hamburgers with onion rings as a topping. Things like that, none of which exist here. …Well, I mean, the components for hamburgers probably exist but the ground beef would probably be ‘grunger’ meat or something and I guess I technically haven’t seen an onion around.

Sorry, I’m getting off topic again.

It…came to me. Kind of in a dream. Just this…entire other life…or the fact that I used to live one. There was a voice, too, but I can’t remember what it said. It sounded gentle though.

It’s…already tough. I’ve…been…I don’t know. Conscious? Aware? For, like, seven years now. And for a whole other lifetime and complex mannerisms and feelings to hit me all of the sudden feels…strange.

I’m trying to sort out my thoughts here, but to be honest, my head is starting to hurt, and apparently Felyn never have headaches because nobody seemed to know what I was describing that first night. …They’re still nice. Very kind. A little strangely strict at times but…there’s comfort.

I think I needed that comfort, because both halves of me are feeling really happy thinking about it.

Anyway…I’ll end this first journal entry here, ‘cause the dye is running out. I have to pick up so many plants to make just a couple pages…I’m just glad one of the boxes the clutter ‘reclaimed’ was full of books, and loose empty parchment.

It’s really nice being a girl and having a tail.

I’ll write more later.

—---------------------------------------------------------------

The skies were an eerie red, and even through the thick, grey clouds, the equally resplendent Red Moon shined through them. Rain and wind rippled across the forest canopies, piercing and pushing through the leaves enough to leave even anything on the ground below utterly soaked. Water coursed through divots carved through dirt, plants, and fallen trees, leaving miniature rapids flowing through what should’ve been just a forest floor. And a deep and heavy fog seemed to flow even through the intense raindrops, in stark defiance of natural physics, to make the surroundings even harder to see.

It had been doing this for hours, and it had been at least one since Mei had seen any members of her clutter.

The petite, humanoid black cat girl winced and tried, meekly, to raise the additional furs she was covered in over her eyes. Her bare feet struggled to push against the powerful gusts, but at least a combination of her padded soles and extended claws were enough to grip the ground and keep from getting tossed by the wind.

But even as she took every painstaking step one at a time through that wall of air…she could feel her legs shaking. Despite all the fur, both in terms of the long tunic and hood she was wearing, as well as her own natural fluff, the chill that came with those heavy winds and rain were starting to get through to her skin.

Her arms tugged a little tighter to a small bundle at her stomach, a dozen or so pieces of parchment wrapped several times in those same skins, which she had hoped were waterproof, and just in case, she had wrapped her little figure around them to keep them dry.

She passed yet another large tree, scattered broken branches surrounding its base, cleaved by the storm. They were in her way again…she’d have to climb over, or turn around. But no. She was…pretty sure this was the way her clutter had gone. Right?

Mei shut her eyes tight for a moment, her eyes welling up with tears, which dispersed into the rain. She was alone. She’d lost track of them. The people that cared for her. The only people she knew here. This stupid storm had destroyed her new home, separated her new family.

Frustration welled up in her chest, and to the best of her ability, the little black cat shouted into the storm.

“Mima Nia? P-parah? A-anyone? Are you there?! H-help! Please!” she shouted.

Her voice sounded childish. …Well, of course it did. But it was all she had.

And, there was no answer. Her words had gotten lost in the storm.

Thunder rumbled through the forest again. Heavy, booming. Unnaturally loud, even to her sensitive ears. There was no use in staying here, she reminded herself. She had to find shelter until things passed.

Steeling herself to the task of continuing forward, and mustering up just a little bit of her waning energy in the face of utter exhaustion, Mei continued forward. She had to shut her eyes once or twice, as rain bounced off her snout right into them, but she continued on regardless.

She had to. This was her second chance, and she didn’t want to let it end here.

BA-BOOOOOOOM. R-RRRRUMBLE. SNAPSNAP, CRRRRRRRACK!

Everything happened in something of a jumble. There hadn’t been much lightning that close to her, but apparently a singular stray bolt jolted from the sky, slamming into the massive tree Mei was trying to pass. Those crackling noises must’ve been branches snapping clean in two, high above, or maybe the tree itself splitting. Regardless, the bolt had jostled something from the tree. A lot of something.

As that massive bunch of branches fell, Mei had only the briefest time to look up, against the pouring rain and eerie fog, to watch the encroaching wood, and it was all she could do to throw herself against the muddy ground, her bundle protectively huddled against her stomach with one arm while another braced her head, before it all came crashing down.

Just before the weight of an enormous number of fallen branches collapsed down atop her, Mei was distinctly aware of one more hopeful thought, even if it was a bleak acceptance of her circumstances.

Please let me reincarnate again. And let me live a happier life.

And as one final thick tree branch conked her on the head, Mei immediately fell unconscious.

—---------------------------------------------

Journal Entry #3

I’m taking a moment to talk about just how cool it is to be a cat. Er, catgirl. But with fur all over. Hopefully you know what I’m talking about.

First of all, it’s the fur. It’s crazy soft, and I can just…hug myself? And pet myself. Sometimes I just kind of brush my fingers across my arm just to feel the fluff between it when I feel anxious, and it calms me down something fierce. Sure, it’s…kinda higher maintenance, but there’s some really clear streams near here that, with the help of some scented flowers, I can keep it pretty fluffy with.

Just to note, Felyn do NOT clean themselves with their tongues. Honestly…thank goodness.

Having big fluffy ears is nice, too. For hearing, especially. I can’t exactly measure how far away I can hear really clear sounds, but…for the record, I can hear things farther than I can see them. And I can see farther than I could before. So…there’s that.

The muzzle has taken a little bit of getting used to, just having my nose always just under my field of vision, but…one helpful thing is that if I just let my new-Mei thoughts take over a little, I hardly notice it. It’s like when you can forever only see two people kissing in that one picture after you thought about it, except I have the ability to flip a switch and see the vase? …Except it’s whether or not I notice my nose. …Does this make any sense at all?

Oh, and…the tail is great. It’s also fluffy like the rest of me, and…it…just sort of helps me balance? Which is, I guess, what tails are supposed to do. Honestly, it was embarrassing that morning after I ‘remembered’, being unable to stand up or even walk ‘cause my tail kept getting in the way, or rather, I kept getting in the way of my tail? But now…I never would’ve dreamed of having this good a sense of balance.

Speaking of which, climbing things is fun. I know why cats do it, now. I remember, faintly, having a fear of heights, and now that’s just gone. I can climb the bark of, like, a twenty-foot tree and tightrope walk across the branches. I can tree-parkour! That’s so cool! …Kinda tough to express in words in a journal, I guess. Maybe I’ll draw a diagram or something later.

Anyway, the fire’s going out, and everyone’s getting ready to sleep. The others keep asking me what I’m writing and in these weird words. Uh, I don’t have an answer other than I was learning to read all those books we found and trying to write like them. It’s…uh, worked for now.

…I…should be more careful about writing these in my hovel, though. Maybe I could climb a tree, and, like, write up there? …It’d be windy but maybe I could find a really flat rock to write on. Fantasy clipboard!

Anyway, this has been Mei. ...Hopefully I can write some more!

—---------------------------------------------

Mei awoke someplace warm. Soft, even.

It took her a few moments to blink her exhaustion from her eyes. She faintly remembered going in and out of consciousness. Being picked up and carried…somewhere.

But unlike the rocky walls of her hovel that she’d grown used to. The walls were a mixture of wood, stone, and tightly woven twigs…definitely a building of some sort. A home? But built in a more old fashioned way, for sure. From what Mei had read in the books her clutter had found, that sounded about right.

She was laying in a bed, beneath some soft and heavy covers, seemingly resting in the quiet corner of the room. Her body still ached all over, especially along her back and at least one leg, but she could curl her fingers and toes. She felt her ears softly twitch against her long, black hair, and felt a warm relief immediately flow through her.

She was still Mei. Still Felyn. Still herself, and still alive.

“Oh. O-oh dear, she’s awake. One moment, one moment…” a voice said from somewhere off to the side, followed by some hasty footsteps. Mei gently turned her head, the sound of water splashing about were accompanied by the approaching figure of…a smiling, human woman.

Her features were ever so softly age-creased, and a few tiny lines of her bright red hair were tinged with fading and gray, and she was clothed in a simple long dress, a darker faded green in color.

In her hands was a sort of ceramic cup. Mei’s nose twitched. Water.

“You are awake, aren’t you? …Oh, dear, can you understand me? I don’t believe I’ve ever met a Felyn before…”

Mei could. Every word. Strange. There must’ve been some kind of common dialect that everyone used, humans and Felyn alike. She’d worried, in the back of her mind, whether if she met anyone else, she’d be able to communicate, but…

“I-I’m okay,” Mei responded, her voice light and shaky. Her words terse, and with a parched throat and dry tongue, she realized almost immediately that she was thirsty, despite…well, all the rain. “Where am I…?”

“You’re in Deylind. A settlement a bit aways from the forests, I’m afraid,” the woman replied, a tinge of worry creeping across her kind face. “A merchant brought you in, naught but a few days ago. You were soaked through and battered and muddy and feverish, poor thing, and so we offered to take you in-”

“I did no such thing! Would’ve been fine if that nosy woman’d just tossed it back into the wild where it belongs,” said another, gruffer, masculine voice. In the distant corner of the room was a tall, broad man, filling out a well-worn off-white tunic, occasionally stained with what seemed to be working-grease. His back was turned, and Mei could hear the sounds of tearing leather and rope shuffling across wood. He must’ve been making something.

The woman quickly shot him a pertinent glare, before turning a gentle gaze back down to Mei, with a smile. “Don’t…mind him. You can call me Tarrine. Or Rine, if it’s easier. Ah, you really should drink…” The woman offered the water once more.

Aches and pains, albeit ones that felt a lot duller, rolled through her body as Mei sat up, and glanced down. She had wrappings, bandages, around her torso, albeit ones that looked fresh and clean, and she’d apparently been lent something of a long tunic as well…albeit one that seemed to fit her more like a baggy, hand-me-down dress. With sheepish, flattened ears, she gave the woman…Rine, it seemed, a look of appreciation, and took the water. It was heavier than she expected, and she found she had to hold it with both hands.

Oh, but the second she drank it, she shivered. Okay, so her body was really, really thirsty.

“T-thank you,” Mei murmured simply between drinks. The situation was still…weird and unusual. …Well, for new-her. Old-her? …Okay, so maybe she’d never come out of an injury and fever-coma surrounded by strangers before in either of her lifetimes.

She noticed the man in the corner pause for a moment to spare a glance, glare over his shoulder for a moment, before going back to his work.

A little unnerved, and taking another thoughtful sip as Rine pulled a stool to sit next to the bed, Mei met Rine’s caring gaze as it lingered on her.

“It’s…alright for me to be here, right? I-I can go…” Mei began quietly enough that she hoped the man couldn’t hear. She made motions to hand over that cup of water, though Rine gently nudged it back.

“Nonsense. At least not until you’re back on your feet again,” stated Rine, with finality. “The merchant said she found you all alone in the middle of the forest, not another Felyn in sight. Did you get separated from your family?”

Mei winced. “S-sort of. There was this big storm…”

Rine’s eyes went wide, and a hand covered her mouth. “O-oh dear. The Moon Flash. You were caught out in that? All on your own?”

“Moon…Flash?”

The woman’s expression again shifted to one of worry…and then relief. She reached a hand out gently, and then paused. And when Mei very gently nodded her acceptance, Rine gently stroked Mei’s head, between her ears.

“The Moon Flash is a magical storm that seems to occur once every couple years. It generally misses us by a safe distance…oh dear. There’s so much devastation every time one hits. You’re so lucky to have survived it!”

Mei nodded, and…felt a thought just kind of slip past her mind, for a moment. I survived this time, at least.

The small feline took another thoughtful sip of water, and went quiet for a moment.

“S-so,” she began, her voice a little…shakier than expected, “the merchant didn’t find any…other Felyn? A-at all?”

Rine gently shook her head.

“None. But, luckily, that includes that they didn’t see any others that succumbed to the storm. I’m sure your family is alright…”

Mei felt a weight lift from her chest. And, refreshed by just a little bit of water, felt herself tear up for a moment. “Good,” she said, softly.

Rine smiled, and gave one of Mei’s ears a scritch. “Until you’re better, this can serve as your home, okay? And perhaps you’ll be reunited with your family before long at all-...”

“Couldn’t be sooner, ‘f you ask me,” grunted the man.

“HALLEN,” Rine snapped, angrily standing upright as she glared at the man. He…Hallen, it seemed, glowered back for a moment, before letting out a resigned grunt and stomping outside, slamming the heavy, wooden door of the home behind him.

The woman stared daggers at the door for a second, before sighing, returning to the bed. “Please forgive him. My husband is under the mistaken impression that anything that lives in the forest is a beast that means us harm. …Anyway…”

Mei could feel the fur on the back of her neck stand on end, and her tail tuck around one of her legs from the bad energies in the room. But as Rine seemed to relax, so did she.

…Until an intrusive thought popped into her head.

“O-oh! My things! Did the merchant lady bring my thi- Owwwwwwwww…” Mei sat upright, and immediately felt every aching muscle in her body scream in pain. As she winced and layed back down, Rine only chuckled.

“Your things? Oh, you mean your little bundle of writings? Of course.” Rine reached beneath the bed, gently revealing and placing the small bundles of fur wrapped around a couple dozen journal entries, a bit mud-stained but seemingly scrubbed clean, into the small cat’s lap. She blushed.

“I hope you don’t mind. I did take a look through them, though I must say I couldn’t recognize the letters. It’s certainly not Script. Did you get these from a Mage? N-not that I mean to pry…”

Mei’s ears folded back in embarrassment, and she shook her head. “N-no. I, um, they’re mine. I kind of wrote them…”

And, in Mei’s head: Mages? Script? Let me just…tuck that back into my personal list of ‘things I need to learn’...they’re practically highlighted text.

“Oh my, you did? …I shouldn’t be so surprised. I simply didn’t know Felyn had their own language. Gosh, such a talent for writing, and so much at your age.”

Mei nodded, guilt flooding through her. W-we don’t, but…I can’t just say this is ‘English’. Okay, you know the plan. Just…switch your ‘New Mei Mode’ on and go along.

And with that, she just smiled, nodded. And replied with a simple, curt, “Thank you…”

As she took another drink of water, Rine simply watched her for another moment or two, before slowly standing up.

“I’m sorry for being a little…unsure of what Felyn eat, but I’ll be preparing a fish stew shortly. If you’re feeling up to it, would you care to have some?” she asked.

Mei’s stomach answered before she could with an audible growl. And, with a renewed sense of comfort despite the morning’s confusion, she was…again…starting to feel at home. A warm, big smile crossed her feline muzzle.

“That sounds really, really tasty.”