CHAPTER 11 - The Mentality of a Widow. Part 1.

"An accident?! Why didn't you stay to wait for an ambulance?!" Yuki said, wiping the blood from my right arm.

"My injuries are minor, I don't need medical attention."

"You don't have any glass fragments, or at least I haven't found any. You were really lucky, Saik," Noel said.

"Did Iris really come out unscathed?" Yuki asked.

"She came out unscathed; my body protected her from the glass fragments," I replied.

Noel let out a relieved sigh.

"You truly are a lucky charm for my family, Saik. No offense, of course."

"Ah, whatever."

I removed the glass fragments before arriving, so I'll be fine. The wounds aren't deep. After cleaning with hydrogen peroxide and alcohol for disinfection, I'll be fine. I'll have some scars and scabs, but apart from that, I'll be fine.

"I think we'll need more adhesive bandages," Yuki said as she applied bandages to my back.

"I'll get some more," Noel said.

Ah... To think that I would need help for something as insignificant as a glass cut.

Yes, I'm a normal person now. Ah, finally.

Putting aside that I'm being helped by ghosts, I'm a normal person.

Setting that aside, Iris turned out to be... dumber than I thought.

Our conversation wasn't very realistic. Iris didn't question me much and believed me quite easily. Alcohol is really affecting her.

She didn't question how I knew that she sold the engagement rings. Her brain is being impaired.

Ah, alcohol. I never liked its taste, it's disgusting. Why don't adults use drugs instead of drinking alcohol? Well, drugs also harm, but at least they taste better than alcohol.

Ah, right, alcohol is like a legal drug, just like cigarettes. No wonder.

"So, Saik, now that Noel isn't here, do you think there's hope for Iris?"

"There is, Yuki. We just have to be patient."

Knock, knock, knock

Ah, what a hassle.

I deactivated the bodies of Yuki and Noel and headed to the door.

I opened the door and saw a police officer in front of it.

"Good evening, young man."

"I suppose you're here about the accident. Don't worry, I already cleaned my wounds and all that. I don't need medical assistance."

"Yes, I can see that. We just want you to answer a few questions..."

I interrupted him; I'm feeling lazy, I want to have dinner... Well, technically I already had dinner, but I want to eat again.

"I'm not interested in pressing charges or reporting the man who crashed or anything like that. I'm too lazy for all that. And I don't plan on changing my mind. Can I help you with something else?"

The police officer squinted his eyes and smiled at me.

How odd.

"If that's your final word, then alright. Have a good night."

"Thank you."

I closed the door and sighed.

Damn it, he's a part of... Ah, what a hassle.

"Well, that was quick," Yuki said.

Too quick... At least they should act better, idiots.

They really are useless.

Ah, I need to prepare.

•

•

(Pov - Sylphie.)

"Mother, aren't you going to eat?"

"No... I'm not hungry."

She entered her room without saying anything more.

... Why does she look so sad? Much sadder than usual.

I can't smell alcohol... She hasn't had anything today, or at least I haven't seen her.

Plus, she bought a lot of food. She even gave me a lot of money to buy school supplies. Where did she get so much money...? I don't want to think anything bad about her. She couldn't possibly steal or sell her body... Or at least that's what I'd like to believe.

She was capable of rummaging through my things and stealing my money. If she's come to that point, of even being capable of stealing from her own daughter, I can't help but think that she might even sell her body for money.

I hate thinking about that possibility; I just refuse to believe that could happen, but...

"I don't know what to think about her anymore."

I love my mother, but her alcoholism is destroying her, and there's very little left of the loving mother I had.

"Mother..."

I sat down and rested my head on the table.

I don't know what to do with her anymore... I'm tired... She's getting worse every day.

"Father... We really need you."

My mother only listened to you; she'd never listen to me... Why did you have to die?

"It's not fair."

•

•

(Pov - Saik.)

Ah, the second day of school has begun.

"And I'm feeling so lazy. Ah, I hate school."

"Well, at least look at the bright side."

"And what would that be, Yuki?"

"That you're attending an elite school. Not everyone can afford to brag about that."

Ah, I guess you're right.

I entered the classroom and saw Sylphie taking her notebook out of her backpack, but when she saw me, she flinched. I guess my bandages surprised her.

She hesitated whether to approach me or not, but since she took too long to decide, I didn't pay her any more attention and went to my seat.

"Hey, at least say good morning!"

Sylphie's not my concern; I only care about her mother.

I glanced at her. She looks sad and disappointed in herself for not even being able to say "good morning" to a classmate. Well, she's not my concern, so I don't care.

I sat down and took out my notebook.

Ah, well... I'm ready now.

"Good morning, Saik. What happened to your arms? Did you have an accident? Are you okay?" Saoto asked.

I don't sense any other intentions from him. This guy is really a good person. What a bother.

"I just got cut by some glass when a window I was cleaning fell on me, that's all."

"I see. I'm glad it wasn't anything worse.," he said, smiling.

... It's hard for me to hate this guy, but he's annoying. I guess his nice-guy attitude makes me uncomfortable.

"Thanks for the concern, but I'd appreciate it if you left. You ruin my solitude, and I really enjoy being alone."

"Oh, yeah, sorry, that wasn't my intention. I hope you recover soon."

He walked away from me and returned to his seat, while I received judgmental looks from my classmates, especially from the girls.

Ah, whatever.

"Saik, he was just worried about you. You didn't have to be so rude to him," Yuki said.

"I'm sorry, Yuki, but I really don't want to get involved with him or anyone else."

"Yeah, yeah, I know, lone wolf. Ah, I'll never understand you."

I looked around.

Friend groups have already formed.

And as I planned, I'm excluded. I've become the solitary and quiet guy in my class. Well, there are others like me, including Sylphie, who's the only solitary girl in the class, but I won't pay them any attention.

Anyone would think that it's a bad thing, but it's very comfortable and relaxing for me.

I don't have to put up with annoying people.

I don't have to listen to people's problems.

I don't have to listen to others' loud voices that disrupt my thoughts.

Being a loner is quite beneficial for a guy like me. A guy who just wants to have fun alone and be at peace. Well, almost alone, Yuki is an exception. She's nice, so even though she's nosy, whiny, and easily irritated, I really enjoy her company.

"Hey, are you insulting me in your mind?! I got chills!"

I'm also not interested in getting a girlfriend... Although I won't say that I'm not interested at all.

If some weird girl falls for me, I'll accept her. I've always wanted to know what it feels like to have a girlfriend, but since I never fall in love and I'm not attracted to anyone, I never wanted to find out what it feels like, not even as an experiment, because my parents told me I should only have a girlfriend if I love the girl, so I haven't had a chance to experience having a girlfriend since I haven't loved any girl.

But now I'm willing to try, since I found out it's normal to have a girlfriend.

I've never had a girlfriend, so I'm a bit curious, but not too much.

It's not a priority.

Human relationships only serve for reproduction, and I don't want to have children.

But with that romantic story of Noel and Iris, and that love at first sight stuff, and even that love forces us to do things like giving up money, I'm interested in knowing if I can experience that.

Mmm... Oh, but... Will accepting any girl work? I don't know... No, I don't think it'll work. For love to grow, there must be sexual attraction or something like that. I have to accept a girl who fits my personal tastes.

What kind of girls do I like?

Mmm... I think it would be girls with strong personalities, who won't betray me and who don't depend on anyone. A girl who can stand on her own. A girl who won't kneel to anyone.

... Girls like my mother?

Ah... That sounds messed up on my part, but I think so. Have I inherited my father's preferences? Ah, why didn't I inherit intelligence? I only inherited useless things like appearance and eyes, things that don't matter. I wish I had inherited intelligence from my parents or something like that.

"Ah... Yuki is bored, Saik. School is so boring," Yuki said, stroking my ears.

Ah, I feel like a puppy. I'm not complaining, it feels nice, like a massage.

"You should've stayed at home."

Speaking in a low voice would make me sound weird if someone overhears, so I'm speaking very, very quietly.

I don't think the guy sitting next to me can hear me.

"And miss out on the fun?! I promised to help you make friends, and that's what I'll do!"

Ah... Even though I didn't ask for your help.

Friends are unnecessary.

They're not useful to me.

Why would I need friends?

For now, I don't need them. They're just a waste of time.

"It's the second day of classes. We'll choose the class president," the teacher said.

Blah, blah, blah.

Ah... And here I was looking forward to learning something that will never be useful to me in the future.

The class president, the idiot who will tell us what to do. What a bother.

"Any volunteers?"

Saoto, the popular guy, raised his hand.

I don't judge people by their appearance, only by their actions.

He's someone intelligent; I think he'll do a good job. Yes, he might be the typical handsome guy surrounded by girls, a guy who charms girls with his looks and charisma, but he's smart and also reliable, worthy of being a leader.

"I'll do it."

You have my vote, Saoto... Oh, wait...

Ram also raised her hand.

"I'll do it."

Mmm... Difficult decision.

On one hand, I think Saoto would do a good job. From what little I've seen, I've noticed he really pays attention in class. He takes school seriously and isn't just a pretty face.

On the other hand, we have Ram, the brain of the group. I think she has the necessary skills to manage a class.

Who should I vote for? I wonder if they're willing to buy my vote with food. Come on, come on, offer something; I'll vote for whoever offers the most delicious meal.

"And I also propose that Saik, the best first-year student, be the president."

... I'll vote for Saoto.

I raised my hand.

"With all due respect, I decline. If chosen, I won't do anything; I don't care about the consequences. If chosen, it'll be as if there's no president."

I lowered my hand, and everyone began to murmur.

It's not necessary to pay attention to know they're saying bad things about me.

"Ahhhhhhhh! You always find a way to ruin your school life even more!" Yuki shouted, pulling her hair.

I don't care about my classmates' looks.

If I cared about my reputation, I wouldn't have said that, but I don't care what others think of me.

The only thing that should matter to me is what I think of myself.

I shouldn't let other people's opinions of me affect me.

It's my life, and I alone have the right to judge my life. Only my opinion counts, not others'.

"Well... I guess we'll start with the voting."

•

•

Blah, blah, blah. The typical voting. It's not very complicated. Just write the name on a piece of paper and put it in a box.

I'll vote for Saoto, just because Ram tried to ruin my peaceful life.

Well... Is that childish of me? I let my emotions get the better of me... It doesn't matter much; either way, I was planning to vote for Saoto.

He's a good guy, I can feel it.

Even though he's the typical handsome guy who's always popular among girls.

"I've finished counting the votes. Saoto, you'll be the president. Ram, you'll be the vice president."

I could see a hint of disappointment in Ram's eyes. I admit, it was satisfying.

"Don't worry, Ram. Saoto received 11 votes, and you got 9. The difference was minimal."

"Just two votes difference..."

Ram turned to look at me, but I ignored her gaze and continued drawing a cute cat in my notebook.

So cute.

"Perfect, now the handsome guy will become even more popular and steal your chance of any girl falling for you. Seriously, I don't understand you, Saik!"

Don't bother trying, Yuki.

•

•

The first classes ended, now I can enjoy my food. As always, I used my first free period to sleep. Studying until 4 a.m. with Noel left me exhausted, but at least sleeping with so much sleepiness feels wonderful.

Ah, just imagining the smell of my food makes my mouth water.

When I started living with Yuki, I decided to learn how to cook. I've been doing quite well lately. I'm proud of myself.

When it comes to food and video games, my memory is excellent; I remember countless recipes perfectly, but when it comes to school stuff, my brain disconnects. Ah, brain, you're terrible with me. We're supposed to be friends, not enemies, idiot.

I took my food out of my backpack, and Ram put her hand on my table.

Wow, such nice nails. She has pretty hands and slender fingers. Compared to my hand, hers is very small. How adorable.

"Who did you vote for?"

"Isn't the vote supposed to be secret? Are you getting corrupt this quickly, vice president? That must be a record."

"Just answer."

"Ah, well... You're being aggressive. Let's play a game. Hide your hands behind you and raise as many fingers as you want. If I guess the number, you'll leave me alone. If I lose, I'll answer your question."

"... Tsk. Fine. Let's get this over with."

Well, that was easy. I suppose she knew I'd ignore her if she didn't do that and that's why she did it, so I'd answer her. If she lies, I won't answer; if she's honest, I will.

She did as I told her, and Yuki looked at Ram's back. Well, and without needing me to say anything. I think Yuki's mind is being corrupted by me. Well, it's an innocent game, it doesn't matter. It's not like we're doing something illegal.

"She has 7 fingers raised, Saik!"

"The answer is... 7 fingers."

My answer made her slightly surprised, and she sighed, annoyed.

"You're lucky I'm an honest girl... You won."

"Really? Today's my lucky day. Should I buy a lottery ticket...? Ah, I forgot I'm underage. What a waste of luck."

I grabbed my food and stood up.

You were honest, Ram, and that's something I really appreciate in people.

"I voted for Saoto, but it doesn't mean I did it for some stupid reason like hatred or revenge. You might think I got mad at you because you nominated me for president, but that didn't bother me. I voted for Saoto because he has something you don't."

"Ah, really? What is it? A penis?"

"Kindness."

I quickly realized Ram's strong and cold personality. It's not hard to guess that she's a tough girl to deal with.

On the first day of class, she was surrounded by people, but now no one approached her due to her personality. A boring personality that doesn't attract anyone, on the contrary, it just pushes them away.

Having her as president would be annoying.

"Goodbye. I'll go enjoy my solitary life."

I walked away.

Now I'll go eat.

"Saik, Saik, you need to make friends! Invite Noel's daughter to eat!"

"I wonder if the magic chest has been unlocked."

"Saik, don't ignore me!"

I left the classroom and bumped into a girl... Well, she bumped into me because she was running.

"Kya!"

She was about to fall to the ground, but I held onto her arm and prevented her from falling. I'd rather avoid unnecessary trouble, and if a bone breaks, it might be blamed on me.

"Sorry, I was in a hurry."

"No worries."

I continued on my way.

I don't want to waste any more time. Now I'll eat.

•

•

"Hey, Cristal, hurry up! The special sandwiches will run out!"

A girl yelled at the girl who bumped into Saik, whose name was Cristal.

"It's true! Let's go!"

She watched Saik walk away and scratched her head, trying to understand Saik's unique fashion style, as she found him very strange.

"That guy looks weird. Why doesn't he comb his hair?"