“Oh! A fight! So soon, how exciting!” The robot said, blinking its “eyes” repeatedly in red. It continued, “You look awesome!”

I’m probably looking pathetic. Come on, stupid chicken!

He dare not to voice his thoughts. The chicken stopped its advance out of the blue and started pecking the ground near the limit separating the forest from the stream as if forgetting what it should do.

The silence was almost embarrassing, but Mark could take advantage of the time.

“Why did it stop? Maybe it’s not aggressive.” He whispered to himself, but was the robot, Totvs who answered.

“Oh, it’s going to try to kill you, for sure. You should attack it first! Killing it is one of your missions.” the little ball said to him, blinking black lights this time. Irritation in its robotic voice.

“How the hell I’ll do it?” He was regretting leaving his Glock at home. He had permission to carry it, but he thought that one trip to the small city of Crystal Lake would offer no situation to use it. Deep in his heart, he knew he preferred not to carry the gun in any situation. Not anymore.

“What is this thing?” he asked, this time looking at the robot. The eyes of the machine blinked green and stayed in that color, a small hologram appearing in its front with a model of the big chicken turning 360 degrees. Then he started talking while a text appeared in his front.

“SCANNING APPLICANT...

IDENTIFIED:

FEMALE GALLIFIDS [LVL 1]

The Gallifids are an aviary species endowed with superior intellect. dominated the Oxium Galaxy after the former humanoid dominant species created A.I and robots with index fingers. The creature still retains many of its wild instincts, similar to the earthling house cat.”

The robot had a professorial tone, similar to the ones Mark had heard many times in the documentaries he watched in his school days. At the end of the speech, his eyes blinked and turned blue again, the color that seemed the common one.

Maybe if I turn and walk away really slow the beast will not notice. Mark was about to do just that when he heard a familiar sound in the distance.

It was a robot similar to Totvs coming in their direction, for a time he thought it was help, but the machine stopped at the side of the chicken and blinked green in its eyes, a little hologram appearing in the distance. It is identifying me. I wonder what it says.

The Gallifids turned its head in Mark’s direction and started to run with wings opened and cackling louder this time. Mark had little time to decide what to do, but in his mind, now the issue was how he would kill it than what he would do. It was kill or be killed.

When the creature was close to him, it jumped with its claws erect in the direction of his heart. He put his pan between him and the beast's natural weapons, just to see her beak coming in the direction of his shoulder and clenching in it.

He released a scream and pushed the beast to the side.

Adrenaline gave him the strength he needed, the beast stumbled on the ground and got up in a fast motion, making the dust fly into the sky. He could see a piece of his flesh on the creature's beak.

It tossed it into the air and swallowed it in one swift movement. Head turned slightly to the side, one eye visible behind the red lens. 

Mark discovered that a Chicken could have murder in its eyes.

Knowing animal anatomy was an essential part of Mark’s job, one he didn’t neglect, unlike French Pastry.

I will never make a decent macaron … concentrate, Mark. He knew he had some ways to deal with this chicken.

He could aim for its wings and make her already difficult flight basically impossible. But her armored feathers were an obvious obstacle. Could work, but it was a bet he would not make.

Not when he had already tasted the sharpness of the beast’s beak. Wet the feathers could be efficient with less risk.

Her eyes and face were impossible to hit with its helm. He could not even try to make her dizzy with the reflection in his pan, a normal chicken would get confused with that, but one with glasses probably not.

Her torso was his best bet. He knew exactly where all the organs of a chicken were and the heart of this one must be big. He had to find a way to get there without its beak tearing his face apart.

The legs! It’s obvious!

Mark gave two steps behind in the direction of the stream while the beast flew in his direction once again, repeating the same movement.

This time he was prepared, and when he defended himself with his pan in his left hand, the right one was already lifted hitting the chicken’s helm and dropping it to the ground.

The creature, just like a normal chicken weighed way less than it seemed and was thrown once again to the side, this time hitting the water. Mark was not the most athletic, but he was not a sedentary one.

Years working in kitchens required you to be lean and train your muscles, or be doomed to a life of back and knee pain.

Adrenaline was pumping hard in his veins, he was experiencing something he had not felt in an eternity. Facing a foe stronger, and still thriving. 

He felt like the times he had shown his bullies he was not someone to be picked on. He would have liked to see how the chicken was seeing him now.

Probably a crazy human with a lot of luck.

He left the water with fast back steps, and the beast followed slowly this time. Water in all its body. The cackling became longer and graver. The creature was in a rage. 

This time it didn’t try to jump at him; instead, it ran in his direction like a bull runs into a torero’s red cloth. Just like one Mark dodged to the side, losing the momentum to hit the creature with his knife, but hitting it with all the force his left hand could produce. 

A cackle of pain erupted from the beast's mouth and Mark could almost hear Totvs shouting in the distance.

“My human will tear your chicken up, Totvs!” The laughter of the machine disappeared while Mark concentrated once again on his task.

The last movement had made both of them fall to the ground. The Gallifids descending his beak nonstop in his direction, but staggering a little due to its wounded leg. Mark dodged some and blocked others with his pan.

In a lucky kick, he hit the other leg of the creature, and it fell to the ground. Mark got up enough to descend again with his knife pointed at the creature’s heart.

The hit was about to connect when the creature forced its clawed limbs into his belly, clenching and pushing at the same time. 

The pain was excruciating. He could feel something was not right. His shirt was wet and the pain was like a dentist’s needle on the palate, but without anesthesia. He had seen his fair share of belly wounds to know when one was mortal.

The push from the beast had thrown him just beside the bonfire he had made. The oakwood still with some places on fire.

His steak with fries was just beside him, if he extended his hands he could take it, but he had more important matters to attend to, like bringing the monstrous chicken with him to the grave.

The creature came half flying and half running in his direction, doing both tasks poorly. It jumped at his torso, once again clenching its claws at him. Then he released his pan and reached from the oak wood, not carrying for what burns he would acquire. It didn’t matter anymore.

He hit the beast’s injured leg at the part which connected it to her torso with all his strength. Once again it cackled, this time to the skies. Mark didn’t waste his chance. His knife came up and fast it went in the direction of the creature’s heart and he felt the knife penetrating the beast’s organ.

The grip of its claws loosened, and her face turned to the side, in an almost expression of surprise. An enraged alien was just like an enraged human, blind. A last cackle sounded from the beast, and it fell to its side.

“Die, you stupid fucking chicken,” He whispered, feeling metal in his mind. Blood, he assumed.

Totvs appeared in front of him, flying from one side to the other. Blinking in all colors, shouting happy to the ground.

“I told you, Totvs! I told! My human is the best!” The robot said pointing its antenna to the other one. Who responded in the most monotonous voice possible.

“Okay. Good luck with the integration. Goodbye, Totvs.” And went back to the sky, without any trace of rush.

“Yeah! Run! Loser!” Totvs screamed and then proceeded to face the steak and fries, ignoring Mark on his deathbed.

He wanted to say something or ask for help, but it was difficult with his mouth full of blood. He was slowly turning to the side when he realized the robot was whispering with its voice full of desire.

“STEAK AND FRIES [RECIPE GRADE B]

EFFECTS: SMALL HEALING CAPACITIES.

DESCRIPTION: Medium Rare steak with rustic fries. Delicious and Juicy.”

And it kept repeating it.