I parked in front of the house and paused. My hands wouldn't stop shaking as they let go of the steering wheel, even after trying to calm down. "Fucking stupid shit, fuck!" I yelled, hitting and kicking stuff in Dad's beloved car. I felt like an overcharged battery that needed to zap something or someone to unload and feel normal again.

"What would Dad do? What would Dad do? What would Dad do?" I whispered. He'd run. Or shout. Or shout while running. Let's not do that. Anything but that.

I took a deep breath and left the car, hoping I could make my way into the house unnoticed. I knew it was an hour earlier than agreed, and Dad wouldn't like that, but fuck it. It was the most responsible thing to do, I think. I wasn't used to being responsible.

While driving home, I wondered how I'd get to him without pissing him off too much and thought I could knock this time. Just this once. But in the hallway, I heard soft mumbles from the living room. It looked like I wouldn't have to break my habit of not knocking after all.

I stopped a step before the living room's opened door and waited, hoping to eavesdrop on a juicy conversation.

"Did I do this right?" a feminine voice said. I could have sworn I knew that voice.

"Let me check," said Dad. "Safety on, you're good to go! Hang on!" I heard him move around on the sofa.

"I can't believe we're about to do this!" she exclaimed.

"Come on, now!" commanded Dad. "Piston in cylinder! Stick it in!"

Damn! Dad was getting dicked right there! Priceless! I would have given a lot to see him getting screwed by some woman. If only it could have been by Mom, with a huge cock...

"Oh, you're so warm!" said the lady.

"Damn, you're thick, girl!" protested Dad. She giggled at his comment. "Ah!" he gasped. "You're stretching me out!"

"Did I hurt you?" the woman asked. "Am I... Too big?"

"Nah, a deep plowing's what I wanted. You're not completely in, are you? How much more is left?"

She took a few seconds to answer. "Halfway?"

"Then, go ahead, keep pushing! Oh! Stop! Reverse! That's too deep!" he complained, which made me laugh. Big mouth, tiny pussy, I thought. Didn't change too much from before.

"What are you waiting for? Move your ass!" Dad snapped.

"Can't we... Take our time?" she hesitantly asked.

"We haven't got all night!"

"Fine," she gave up, followed by faint butt-slapping noises.

I quickly glanced at the corner. Dad was kneeling on the sofa, a blonde woman fucking him doggy style. When I realized both faced away from me, I approached and leaned against the doorframe, enjoying the show. I couldn't see much besides the woman's cute ass. I could tell she was young and tall. I chuckled. Too bad I didn't have popcorn. "Who's the bitch, now?" I whispered. I displayed my naughtiest smile and took my phone out to film this. Even more priceless! That's when I noticed I calmed down enough for my hands not to shake anymore.

"Come on, harder!" requested Dad, clearly enjoying this.

"Sorry," she said. "I thought this would be easier."

"Put more heart into it. Your hips have to do the work!"

"But... What if I hurt you?"

"That's my problem. You know what? Fuck me like you wanted to hurt me, alright?"

"I can try," she obeyed but seemed to struggle.

"Ah! I said: Not so deep!" yelled Dad. "Faster, not deeper!"

"Isn't that," she started, before taking her breath already, "a bit too rough... For your first time?"

Ha! How could she be stupid enough to believe this was his first time? I wouldn't have trusted him on that.

"I got this," he said. "I'm tougher than you think. Keep going! Don't be scared to grab my hips and use your arms! Yeah, like that. That's working!"

"Will?" she asked, panting. "I can't... Keep up... For long..."

"Yeah, I'm getting there," he said. That's when Dad saw my reflection in the window. "What the fuck?" he yelled. He and his lady hastily turned around.

"Oopsie," I said, stopping the video. "Sorry to interrupt."

I confidently entered the room and looked at them. The lady had a huge erect cock with a condom on. It wasn't Mom, but knowing a cock that big was fucking Dad felt good. "Hi, Sarah," I said, recognizing her. "Rather daring of you to come here after the damage you've done. At least I'm glad to see you guys still have condoms! Mind to share?"

"Fucking kids!" yelled Dad. "You said you wouldn't come back before midnight! Leave! Right now!"

I shrugged. "You told Mom you didn't have an affair with Sarah. And you told me you didn't have any condoms left. Sorry, rubbers," I said, imitating him. "Oh, by the way, I think that one's yours," I added, getting that used condom from earlier and throwing it at Sarah's feet.

Sarah was beyond embarrassed at that point. She had grabbed her dress and awkwardly hid behind it, her cock bulging through the fabric. "Listen, Helen, I'm sorry... I should leave... But I don't understand. What's mine?"

"The condom! Found it in Dad's car today. It's probably better for everyone that you keep fucking at the office or in the car."

"What?" shouted Sarah, turning to Dad. "Who was with you in your car?"

Dad stood up, not even caring that he was totally naked, except for his socks. I took a good look at him and smirked. Too bad he was too hairy down there to see much more than a thick tuft of pubic hair, but it was clear enough that he had swapped. "A vagina suits you so much better," I defiantly said.

He walked past his young secretary, ignoring her. "You're so dead..." he said with a concerned voice.

I laughed. "You're like a chihuahua. You know, those tiny dogs? You bark all day but never bite."

"And you're like a mosquito: a skinny nuisance that wouldn't survive long without biting. Now, get the fuck out of my house!" he commanded me. "No, wait! What about the phone? Were you fucking filming us? Give it to me!"

I quickly typed on it, walking around the dining table to avoid Dad.

"Give me that fucking phone," he yelled, running circles with me.

I was so absorbed in my phone that I didn't notice him building an obstacle with chairs, which slowed me down enough for him to catch me. He was directly going for the phone, but I resisted and fought back. In our struggle, our bodies touched several times. He was fucking covered in sweat. Disgusting. Seeing I was about to lose that altercation, I sent my knee right into his naked crotch. I was pretty sure my knee wasn't only wet from sweat this time. Yuck!

Dad groaned and collapsed to the ground, allowing me to escape.

"Ahhh..." he moaned, kneeling, both hands on his crotch. "I thought this didn't hurt for chicks!" he complained.

"You're so dumb," I said. "How could you think anyone's private parts weren't sensitive? Here!" I threw my phone at him. "I uploaded the video. It's on the internet now. You can't delete it anymore. Harder, harder! Oh, not so deep!" I imitated him again. I turned to Sarah. "Don't worry, even I didn't recognize you from behind."

Dad used a nearby chair to help him up. He looked at me in silence with his typical angry face. I had seen that too much to be scared anymore. I knew he was all mouth.

"That's it," he finally said. "Now I will kill you for real." He slowly approached me, and I didn't move, standing my ground.

Sarah intervened and slapped Dad in the face before he reached me. The poor fuck didn't know how to react.

"Jesus!" yelled Dad. "What the fuck was that about?"

"That was for lying to me," she said. "And for fucking another woman. Consider yourself lucky I don't kick you between the legs as well! You'd deserve it!" She turned to me, displaying a sorry face. As if that would coax me. "Your mom was right, sweetheart: he's just a cheating pig. And you were right: this suits him much better than his small prick!"

"Glad we can agree on that," I stated, nodding at her.

"So what? You're going to leave too?" asked Dad. "Great, at least I'll get some peace!"

"Oh, no," said Sarah, pissed. "You'll still hear a lot more from me. And, Helen? You won't ever see me again here. Good luck! See you at work, Will!"

I watched Sarah grab her things, and I smiled as her naked little butt wiggled out of the room through the kitchen door. I had to admit Dad had great taste when choosing his women.

He sat back on the couch, his elbows on his knees, his head resting in his hands, and sighed. "Fucking women," he said. "I don't have balls anymore, but you're still somehow breaking them. Fucking glorious!"

I remained there and soon heard the front door close, indicating Sarah had left. Dad leaned back on the couch and pushed aside his pubic hair, giving his pussy a check. I stayed and watched him in silence as he touched and massaged his genitals. Without giving a shit, he stuck two fingers up his cunt in front of me.

"Dad!" I sighed, losing hope he'd ever change.

"Oh, you're still there?" he said, obviously faking surprise. "Do you think I care anymore? In one evening, you've ruined me two orgasms!"

I closed my eyes and shook my head. "Oh, poor thing..." I ironically said. "You forgot I hurt you too."

He shrugged, his fingers still busy. "You hit like a girl. It was nothing. Now, will you really stay and watch me get off? Or will you at least do me the favor of getting lost?"

"Dad!" I complained. "How can you be so..." I meant stupid but swallowed it. "Can you at least think about what's going on right now? Can't you use your two neurons and try connecting them?"

Dad froze and looked at me. For way too long. "You came early," he stated.

"No shit, Sherlock," I replied.

"Why?"

"Ah, finally!"

"Why are you back early? Is my car ok?" he asked.

"Your damn car is fine, but... There was an incident," I said, choosing my words wisely.

Dad stood back up. "Where is your brother?" he asked.

I slightly dropped my act, getting serious. "I left Evan at the clinic. He's waiting there with Justin. I came back to warn you we wouldn't be back by midnight. It's pretty crowded there..."

"I fucking knew I couldn't trust you! Didn't I say it?" he yelled. "I'm doing you a favor for a single evening, and you're already getting me in trouble! I fucking can't believe it!"

"That's what you're thinking right now? Really? That we've put you into trouble? You're unbelievable!" I replied, wondering how stupid I must have been for expecting anything more from him. I turned around and left the room.

"Where are you going?" asked Dad, following me.

"Hello?" I ironically asked. "To the clinic? Where else? Evan and Justin are there, alone, without a car. Do you think I'll let them walk for like an hour through town in the middle of the night? Unless a miracle would make you take your fucking responsibilities for once and go there with me?"

One of his shoes flew above my head and bounced on the wall. "You remind me so much of your mom," he yelled, grabbing his boxers. "Problems, always problems!"

"Yet you couldn't resist sticking your dick inside her and making kids, didn't you? Twice!"

"Well, that wouldn't happen now!" he grumbled.

"Hurry up," I interrupted him. "I'm leaving with or without you in two minutes."

"Don't worry," Dad said. "I'm coming to kill them both! And I don't care if there are witnesses!"

"You don't even know what happened, and you already want to kill them?" I asked.

"I guess Justin invited a girlfriend that knocked Evan up?"

"What makes you so sure it's not Justin that had a problem?"

"If it was Justin, it's Justin's parents that you would be annoying now. Why else would you need me to come?"

I sighed and didn't answer. "I'll wait in the car," I said before leaving. I anxiously fidgeted until Dad finally arrived.

"I'm riding her," he said. I hated that stupid fantasy of him that cars were women who needed to be driven by men.

"Nope, I'll handle it," I said, already occupying the driver's seat. "Hurry, you're wasting time!"

Dad sighed but gave up surprisingly fast. Was he taking this seriously? I started the car and drove in an awkward silence for a few minutes.

"So, will you tell me what happened?" he asked. I looked at him. "Keep your eyes on the road!" he yelled.

"Shut up, Dad," I said. "If you could be serious once in your life, now would be the time!"

"Why?" he replied.

"Because Evan and I need you right now!" I hated to admit it, but I did need him. More than I thought I would. If only to get some moral support.

He sighed. "What, then?"

"Tell me, honestly. You didn't want to have kids, right?"

He sighed louder. "Here comes more problems..."

"Dad!" I complained.

"Alright! No, I didn't want to have kids."

"Then why did you anyway?"

I could tell he took me seriously by how long he thought before answering. "We were young when we met, your mom and I. Younger than you. We liked each other and were curious. There wasn't internet like today, back then. And so, you know, sex is a powerful force that is hard to resist, especially as a guy. I mean, I bet you can understand, given how your right arm is becoming visibly stronger than your left by the day."

"Dad!" I complained again. Hearing him open up felt good. Like I discovered a new part of him until he became himself again. "Why do you have to ruin it? What then?"

"When your mom got preggo, she wanted to keep you, start a family, and all that shit. All I wanted was to take my shot and run. She forced me to stay."

"Was Evan also an accident?" I asked.

"Same as with you. For me, yes. Probably not for your mom."

"Then why didn't Mom take us with her when she left? If she wanted us and you didn't?"

"Guess," he said.

I frowned. "The pension would have been too expensive? Unless you just wanted to piss her off?"

"I hoped she'd come back for you," Dad calmly said. "I still sometimes hope she does."

"Keep dreaming! She'll never come back for you," I thought but didn't say. I sighed instead. "Why did you say you wanted to kill Evan and Justin earlier?"

"Because that's what a good dad does," he stated.

I laughed. "That's what a clueless dad does," I replied.

"What the fuck do you know about being a dad?"

"Back when Mom got pregnant, would having your dad yelling at you 'I'll kill you' help much?"

"He did yell!"

"But did it help?" I insisted.

"Who cares? What's done is done."

"Exactly! What's the point of yelling and throwing threats around if the deed is done and it doesn't help?"

"Helen, you're starting to piss me off with your questions! If it doesn't help Evan, at least it'll help me feel better! Good enough for you?"

Fucking selfish prick. It always was and always will be. I should have called Mom, and even though she's an hour's drive away, it'd still be better to have her around than him.

Dad's tantrum started a new silence. "So," I eventually started, "I've already done better than you? Right? Since you already had me at my age."

"Is this a competition, now?" he asked. " It doesn't count: you've only been having a dick for three weeks. Wait," he added, sitting up. "Stop my car!"

"What?" I asked, not understanding his sudden change of tone. "Why?"

"Stop right now! If I need to kill you, I don't want to die in a car crash!" I obeyed and parked where I could. I wasn't playing tough anymore. "Did you see Emma tonight?" he asked, getting angry again.

I slowly shook my head.

"For God's sake, Helen!" he exploded. "Are you trying to tell me you went with your brother and got that Justin bumped?"